Only Love Can Heal

by Rosie Harris

  ‘I know. And before we know what’s happened we’ll have a son in his teens!’

  ‘That reminds me,’ Robert said quickly. ‘I have managed to reserve a place for Russell at Danebury Prep School, in Windsor. He will be starting there next term. It’s a first class training school, for Eton …’

  ‘You have done what!’ Kate stared at Robert in disbelief. Her mind was racing ahead, wondering what Nanny’s reaction would be to such a revolutionary step.

  ‘If he stays where he is now he doesn’t stand a chance of passing the entrance exam for Eton,’ Robert said blandly.

  ‘What on earth are you talking about. He is already attending one of the finest private day schools in this part of Somerset,’ Kate exploded.

  ‘Their curriculum might be excellent for Marlborough or Winchester but not for Eton,’ Robert informed her. ‘I’ve looked into the matter very carefully and, believe me, I know what I am talking about.’

  ‘I am quite sure you do, but why on earth has he got to go to Eton?’

  ‘Much the best grounding for him. And after that, to Oxford or Cambridge and then into the army.’

  ‘Russell may not want to go in the army.’

  ‘Rubbish! He will be given a commission automatically if he has a degree, which means he will go straight to Sandhurst … He will be proud to serve in the same regiment as his father and grandfather.’

  ‘Well, you may be right but I think we should ask him what he feels about it.’

  ‘Nonsense! I have already made the decision, and I am sure Russell will thank me for it when he is older.’

  Knowing that Robert’s mind was made up, Kate didn’t argue further. Nevertheless, she was determined to have a talk with Russell at the first opportunity she could and see how he felt about it all. It was all very well for Robert to decide for him but she had reservations about the army being right for Russell. He might take after Robert in looks but he was more like her when it came to temperament and she was not at all sure that being a peace-time soldier was the perfect outlet for him. There were so many other careers available that he might enjoy much more.

  In this, as with so many other changes Robert made at Walford Grange, Kate was the loser. Robert built up such a glowing picture of what life would be like at boarding school and at Eton, that Russell was eager to go. The only person who seemed to side with Kate was Mabel Sharp who realised that once Russell went away to school then she would no longer be needed as a nanny.

  Kate hesitated to tell her that since she was now in her late sixties the time had come for her to retire but Robert had no such qualms.

  ‘I would say the time has come for you to be pensioned off, Nanny,’ he told her bluntly when she confronted him about his decision to send Russell away to school.

  ‘Give up!’ Her voice was filled with scorn, her hooded eyes bright beads of anger. ‘What would I want to do that for, eh? This is my home and always will be … thanks to Sir Henry!’

  Robert frowned. He knew Sir Henry had stipulated in his Will that in recognition of her long years of service, Mabel Sharp was to consider Walford Grange her home for as long as she lived.

  ‘Wouldn’t you like a little place of your own, Nanny,’ Robert persisted. ‘A cottage, or a flat, where you would be free to do just as you chose. I’m sure we could fix you up with something suitable.’

  ‘I’m sure you could … and you would like to,’ she told him sharply. ‘Walford Grange is my home, always has been and always will be. There’s no cause for you to try and fix me up with anything else. Sir Henry said I could see my days out here and that’s what I intend to do. And I’ll tell you something else,’ she went on, her mouth a tight line of determination, ‘the only thing that would make me change my mind would be if Miss Kate was to turn me out. Then, of course, I’d have no choice.’

  ‘Nanny, stop it! There’s no question of you being asked to leave. Robert was only trying to be helpful. He just thought you might like your own place, that’s all.’

  ‘Well, he’s got my answer and he was wrong, wasn’t he,’ the old woman answered belligerently.

  Within a year, the whole lifestyle at Walford Grange seemed to have changed. With Russell away at school all term, Kate had plenty of time to enter into all the activities Robert proposed. She was glad of any distraction that helped to deaden the overwhelming sense of loss she felt.

  She went on shopping sprees for new clothes with Eleanor. In the past, because she had rarely gone out, and seldom entertained, she had shown little interest in fashions, but now she began to take stock of her clothes and decided that most of them were dull and did little for her. Not satisfied with bringing her wardrobe up to date, Kate also had her hair re-styled so that even Robert was quite impressed with her new, elegant image.

  Robert was determined that Russell should also establish his rightful place in local society. With this in mind, he planned a gymkhana and invited not just their immediate friends and neighbours but opened it up on a grand scale to riders for miles around. The specially engraved Cup that was to be presented aroused considerable interest and Robert was in his element organising it all. It proved to be so successful that after he and Russell had presented the Cup and the other prizes, Robert promised competitors that it would become a regular annual event.

  Two years later, Russell, who was now at Eton, begged to be allowed to hold a pop festival in the grounds. Several of his new school friends had already staged one at their ancestral homes and they were now looking for somewhere to hold one in July to coincide with Prince Charles being installed at Caernarvon Castle as Prince of Wales.

  Robert was in complete agreement that Walford Grange should be the venue. A large meadow, with easy access from the main road, was made ready. An enormous marquee was erected and draped with red, white and blue bunting, the Union Flag and the Welsh dragon.

  The event caused so much interest that even the National newspapers sent reporters along and there was coverage on local radio and television news.

  Robert and Russell were elated by it all. And even Kate found herself walking round humming some of the tunes that had thundered out from the rock bands that had played non-stop for forty-eight hours to an assembled gathering that ran into thousands.

  Russell returned to Eton as a hero, cheered by those who had attended and envied by those who had not been able to be there. It had changed his entire personality. From being rather shy and nervous he was suddenly full of self-confidence. His place in the school hierarchy was firmly established. Everyone was eager to be invited to Walford Grange and the range of events staged there during the long summer holidays grew rapidly. Robert was always willing to help with any scheme suggested and parents, too, gravitated towards the Somerset mansion when it was learned that the entertainment there was always of the best.

  Chapter 18

  Kate was proud of Russell’s achievements at Oxford. He was an excellent scholar and his prowess at sports was equally rewarding. He had grown tall and filled out so that he now stood shoulder to shoulder with Robert and was almost as broad.

  Seeing them side by side, the one a younger replica of the other, with their burnished hair and green eyes, brought misgivings to Kate’s heart. She was afraid that Robert was moulding Russell too close to his own image. She sometimes thought that it was almost as if Robert was trying to relive, through Russell, the sort of childhood and adolescence he would have liked to have had himself. Robert was such an accomplished organiser, and cajoled Russell into doing whatever he wanted him to do so skilfully, that often Russell believed it to be of his own choice. She secretly hoped that just for once Russell would not take his father’s advice, and go straight into the army when he left Oxford, but follow a career of his own choosing.

  Her prayers went unanswered. There was never any doubt in the minds of either Robert or Russell that Russell would go into the Guards. He applied for a commission even before sitting his finals and as soon as his degree was confirmed he went straight to Sa
ndhurst.

  Kate’s one great fear was that once Russell’s initial training was over he would be sent to Northern Ireland. Ever since Bloody Sunday, three years earlier, the news from the wartorn North grew daily more disturbing. Terrorist activities were even being extended to the mainland with soldiers and civilians in Aldershot, and Birmingham, as well as in London, being killed by IRA bombs.

  The sight of him, looking so resplendent in his Second-Lieutenant’s uniform, brought a lump to Kate’s throat the first time he came home on leave. He seemed to be a reincarnation of Robert when she had first known him. The same brilliant eyes, decisive mouth, prominent nose and firm square chin with a cleft in the centre. The only real facial difference was that Robert sported a bristling moustache, and the colour of their hair. Robert’s, though now fading and streaked with grey, had been curly and a deep rich glowing red when he was in his twenties, whereas Russell’s was straight and sandy.

  Not only were they alike in looks and build but in their mannerisms and attitudes to life also. The only dissimilarity was that Russell’s self-assuredness seemed to stem naturally from within whereas Robert’s manner remained slightly pompous and self-imposed.

  Robert did everything possible to make sure that Russell’s first leave was something of an occasion. The entertaining was lavish. Friends and wealthy neighbours for miles around were invited over for drinks, or to dine. Even though it was rather late in the year for tennis, the courts were tidied up and matches arranged.

  On Russell’s last night at home they staged a splendid dinner for a select number of close friends and afterwards ten times that number were invited to a dance that went on until the early hours of the morning.

  Around midnight, as she sat sipping champagne and watching the whirling crowd of dancers, Kate caught sight of Russell and Melany Buscombe dancing together, Melany’s head resting on Russell’s shoulder. It made Kate feel suddenly old. It was hard to believe that Russell was now twenty-two and that he was old enough to marry.

  ‘Watching the love-birds? They make a handsome pair, don’t they?’ Eleanor commented as she appeared at Kate’s side. ‘I didn’t know that they were quite so close though, I must say.’

  ‘Are they close?’ A tremor of fear ran through Kate as she asked the question. She didn’t want to lose Russell yet, not even to her dearest friend’s daughter.

  ‘I believe they have been writing to each other.’

  ‘You mean while Russell has been at University?’

  ‘I’m not sure about that but certainly since he has been at Sandhurst.’

  ‘I had no idea …’

  ‘Well, Mother is always the last one to hear these things.’

  Kate turned her attention back to the dancers, looking for Melany or Russell, but she could no longer see either of them. She felt uneasy. It was impossible to overlook Melany for she was so tall, her long, dark hair piled up on top of her slender neck, revealing her fine aristocratic features, and making her look even more willowy. Where were they, she wondered.

  Questions boiled inside Kate’s head. Just how serious was Russell about her and would she make him a good wife. She could hardly wait to find Robert and have his reassurance.

  ‘I can’t think of a finer match,’ he enthused, his green eyes glittering, when she confided in him. ‘Just think what it would mean … the Buscombes’ lands joined on to those of Walford Grange, Russell would be the most powerful landowner in the whole county.’

  Kate turned away, her heart heavy with shock; aching with disappointment. He had not said one word about whether Russell and Melany were suitable for each other, only the resultant wealth and power such a liaison would bring. It sent her thoughts hurtling back to when she had said she wanted to marry Robert and her father’s opposition. Had he recognised, even then, Robert’s innate desire for power, and the ruthlessness with which he was prepared to pursue his aims? She wondered if Russell’s interest in Melany was just as mercenary.

  Her unease lessened over the next few months. Once Russell returned to his unit, Melany seemed to spread her favours amongst a number of eligible young men. When she mentioned this fact to Eleanor, her friend frowned and looked rather worried.

  ‘I am beginning to think she is a born flirt,’ Eleanor admitted. ‘She never seems to be with the same young man two days’ running. The latest seems to be Carlile Randell.’

  ‘I don’t think I have even heard of him,’ Kate frowned.

  ‘Probably because he is quite new on the scene. He has just bought Wherwell House.’

  ‘Oh!’ Kate looked suitably impressed. ‘Is Carlile the son?’

  ‘No, he’s the chap who has bought it. Made his money in oil, I believe. They say he is a multi-millionaire.’

  ‘How old is he for heaven’s sake?’ Kate asked in surprise.

  ‘Late thirties, early forties. Rather old for Melany, I suppose.’

  ‘Mm, I agree. Still, Melany is almost twenty so he can hardly be accused of cradle-snatching, I suppose. What is he like?’

  ‘Quite devastating. Tall, dark and handsome, looks a rogue but very dashing. He has impeccable manners and oozes charm. I can see why she is attracted to him.’

  ‘And is he serious or just playing around?’

  ‘It is very hard to tell. I don’t know very much about his background. He’s obviously well-educated but …’ she shrugged rather helplessly.

  ‘Let’s hope he doesn’t break Melany’s heart,’ Kate said thoughtfully.

  ‘I agree. Like all young girls she is pretty headstrong, so there is not much point in talking to her.’ She giggled. ‘Remember what we were like at that age?’

  ‘We were both in the forces, it was all so different in those days.’

  ‘Well, we were probably the same when it came to marrying. Neither of us married the men our parents thought suitable.’

  ‘You did, Eleanor … eventually.’

  ‘Yes, I suppose so. My first escapade though must have turned my mother’s hair white. And your parents didn’t exactly approve of your choice, now did they?’

  ‘They didn’t mind once Robert had his commission,’ Kate answered, her mouth tightening.

  ‘No, it automatically made him a gentleman when he became an officer, I suppose,’ Eleanor agreed drily. ‘He has certainly picked up the lifestyle without any problems.’

  ‘Robert’s an excellent farmer and a very good businessman,’ Kate defended.

  ‘Yes, and Russell has probably inherited those qualities as well as breeding and background so he has the best of both worlds. I would like to see him and Melany marry. Somehow seeing our Estate merge with yours would make me far happier than seeing them taken over by a newcomer like Carlile Randell.’

  Kate smiled non-committally. She knew that it was what Robert hoped for but for very different reasons. He wanted to see Walford Grange expand while he still had some control over it and she wondered how Eleanor would react if that happened.

  Russell seemed oblivious to the turmoil going on in the minds of the people around him. His interests lay solely in furthering his career in the army. And, at that, he was already making good progress. He was now a full Lieutenant and scheduled for a course at the end of which he would be promoted to Captain.

  Robert was elated by the news and never tired of telling Kate how right he had been to insist on Russell joining the army.

  ‘It has made a man of him,’ he boomed, twirling the stiffened ends of his bristling moustache. ‘Finest career in the world! And since he comes from a long line of soldiers it was only fitting that he should follow.’

  Since she knew there was no arguing with such facts, Kate kept her own counsel but she still hoped that in the not too distant future Russell would tire of the army and come home to Walford Grange. She knew in her heart that Robert would discourage such a decision because, just like her father, as long as he was fit he wanted to be in control.

  Although she had to admit that Robert did an admirable job in organising and
running the Estate she wished he were not quite such a tyrant. He had made such sweeping changes, that her father would hardly recognise Home Farm and the surrounding farmland, she thought wistfully. Most of the changes were beneficial and all of them were cost effective. He planned everything in much the same way as if he were fighting a battle. Cleanliness and orderliness were top priority and everything was done strictly to the rule book.

  She had been deeply grieved to see Greg Paxton leave Home Farm since she knew he loved the place almost as much as she did.

  ‘I never in all my life expected to be doing something like this, but I’m afraid the new Master’s ways are not mine,’ he told her bluntly when they parted. ‘I just can’t bring myself to change, not at my time of life.’

  ‘Then why not think it over again,’ she urged.

  ‘I have done nothing else but think about it ever since the Colonel took over. His ways are not mine and that’s all there is to it. No, it will be better for both of us if I go.’

  ‘Have you managed to find another farming job?’ Kate asked, her brown eyes dark with concern.

  Greg Paxton shook his grey head. ‘No one wants a man of my age. My eldest boy and me are taking on a small-holding. Sheep and steers, we thought. He’s got another job so we will manage all right. I hope, in time, to build the place up ready for him to take over. Not afraid of hard work, you know, Miss Kate.’

  ‘I know you are not, Greg.’ She smiled into the weatherbeaten face as she held out her hand. ‘Good luck. Come and see me sometime and let me know how you are getting on.’

  ‘I shall look forward to doing that,’ he told her as his gnarled hand closed over her soft smooth one. ‘We’ve known each other a long time. I remember you when you were a tiny girl with your first pony. I used to be that proud when Sir Henry allowed me to take you out on a leading rein …’ His rheumy eyes filled with tears and Kate found herself turning away, afraid he would see that her own eyes were also moist at the memory of those far off days.

  In her heart Kate felt angry that Robert was making such dramatic changes. She didn’t want them to be commercialised, couldn’t see the necessity of being the biggest or the most modern farm in the county. Anger flooded her when she recalled their most recent argument, that they should open up Walford Grange to the public.