by Cora Davies
"I don't think I could sleep after... well, after everything."
Once upstairs, Eli changed into a clean pair of jeans and a dry work shirt, while Claire made herself comfortable on the recliner. He turned on the news and handed her the remote.
"I'll be back as soon as I can," he said, leaning down and pressing his mouth against hers for what was supposed to be a quick kiss. But her lips were eager, and he found himself struggling with his decision to go back to work. Gentle vibrations started on the floor as the band downstairs began to play. He pulled away, then kissed her once on her forehead before leaving.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Bacon.
Claire stretched and pulled the blanket over her face, shielding herself from the sunshine. Why was there so much light? It was like all the trees had been cut down, letting the sun in at full power. And why did it smell like bacon?
She rubbed her arms; they were bare.
She remembered. Her disastrous date with Ben, the fight in the parking lot. Eli.
Her body tingled as she thought of him kissing her in the kitchen, carrying her around his house, taking her into his bedroom. The things he had done to her body.
She would have sunk deeper into the mattress if it possible. A voice chanted in her head.
Eli likes me.
Eli likes me.
Eli likes me.
Claire's stomach growled, a bacon smell side-effect. She sat up and yawned, catching her reflection in the mirror over the dresser. She wanted to dive under the covers. The curly hairstyle may have been cute the night before, but this morning it was a mess of knots and tangles. Black makeup smudged around her left eye like a raccoon.
Claire crept to the bathroom, grateful that it was in Eli's bedroom and not off the living room. She slid the door closed quietly behind her. She turned around and saw a note taped mirror above the sink.
Claire
Clean towel and more comfortable clothes.
Eli
On the counter was a pair of flannel pajama pants and a t-shirt sitting on top of a towel. Claire fingered the collar of the shirt for a moment, giddiness almost overtaking her, before slipping out of her clothes and getting into the tub.
Ten minutes later Claire emerged from Eli's bedroom, a little more put together. He sat at the table, a textbook and spiral notebook open in front of him. In the center of the table sat a stack of pancakes and a plate of bacon. She stood motionless in his doorway for a moment, watching him as he wrote. His expression was one of clarity whenever he read in their group sessions, and alone he was no different.
Eli stopped writing and took a sip of water. He spotted her, and his eyes traveled over her body, an unreadable look on his face.
"What?" Self-conscious, Claire settled into the chair next to Eli, bending one leg underneath her.
"Nothing. It's just, wow. Those clothes never look that good on me." Eli still watched her; Claire was sure she could feel his gaze on her skin. She blushed. "Do you want coffee?"
"Coffee would be divine," Claire said. Eli stood and pulled two mugs from the cabinet and filled them with steaming coffee. She cleared her throat. "I didn't snore or hog the bed, did I?"
"Snore no. Hog the bed? I didn't give you a chance." Eli set a mug in front of Claire.
"What do you mean?" She poured the creamer, watching until her coffee turned the perfect shade of beige.
Eli put a few pieces of bacon on his plate. "I was the one hogging the bed and snoring in your ear."
Claire laughed. "I slept really well, so whatever you did..." She trailed off, taking a sip. In her mind, she saw the assertive Claire from the night before. Had she actually told Eli, "touch me?"
She had. But regular, boring, insecure Claire was back that morning. Unable to move. She could do nothing except sit and drink her coffee. She wished Eli would touch her again.
Her mom always said when Claire or Rachel wished for something. "Wish in one hand..."
She set her mug down and looked at him. She would have to make it happen.
"What?" Eli asked.
She did not have the courage, and he did not make a move for her. Had the moment had passed? A lapse in judgment for them. Again. The adrenaline. The excitement.
"Last night," Claire started. She ran her finger around the ring of the mug. "Do you regret-"
Eli stood, pulling her out of the chair, her body quivering with anticipation. His fingers were under her chin, tipping her face up to his. "I regret many things in my life, but I don't think you could ever be one of them."
His thumb stroked the line of her jaw. He pressed his mouth against hers.
No magic was lost in the light of day. Eli's kiss was just as needy as it had been in the dangerous hours of darkness. She grew more aware of his touch and all the sensations he created.
His fingers ran through her wet hair. His hands pressed on her back, pulling her so tight against him, they might as well have become one.
Then, as if a spell moved them forward in time, they were in his room, peeling off their clothes. Naked against each other. Kissing. Touching. Flesh upon flesh.
His hands and mouth at her breasts more feverishly than they had been the night before, and he laid her gently across his bed. A hand left her breast to travel to her sensitive peak and he stroked it in tight circles. His mouth on her neck, before reaching her earlobe. Warmth. Kisses. Teeth. "I want you, Claire."
Her toes stretched for the sky as his stroke rocked her from the inside out. "Please."
"Please, what?" Eli asked against her ear. "I want to hear you say it."
"Please," she whispered, her hips moving against the strength of his hand.
"Tell me," Eli said.
"Take me. Now," Claire begged.
He lay against her, touching her for another minute before she heard the rip of foil. His hands at her knees, they opened for him. He climbed between her legs, massaging the sensitive spots on her thighs. He moved forward, his thick tip resting at her entrance. Just like the night before, now she swore if there was an interruption, she would wrap her legs around him and keep him with her.
Eli leaned his hard chest against Claire's peaked nipples, pressing into her. She pulled herself further over him, crying out at the stretch. It had been too long.
"Slow, Claire. Slowly," Eli murmured against her ear, pulling out of her, then sliding deeper yet. Pain unleashed pleasure that had been hiding for too long. With each thrust he entered her further until she was sure he buried himself completely. "Open your eyes."
She did as he told her, surprised to see his face so close to hers. He studied her as he moved in and out of her heat, pinning her down into the mattress each time before leaving her body again.
Each time he pressed, she gasped, filling in a way she had not been filled in so long. Within seconds, any pain that existed was gone, leaving only pleasure. Pure desire.
"Faster, Eli."
Eli smiled, pressing his lips against hers before dropping his face to her neck, teasing her collar bone with his teeth. "You feel so good."
As his pace quickened, so did the pressure building inside her. Eli murmured against her ear complimenting her body. Her tightness. Her skin. Claire could find no words.
Robert never whispered to her or even looked at her in bed. She did not realize that sex could be that enjoyable, instead, assuming it was only an experience pleasurable for men. But she did not believe that anymore.
Stop thinking about the past. Eli is worshiping your body in the present.
Eli moved, standing and pulling Claire to the edge of the bed. He stood between her legs, and held her knees back and entered, pushing inch by ever-throbbing inch inside.
"Oh my, God! Please tell me no one is downstairs, because I'm going to scream," Claire said between breaths.
"Do you want me to stop?" Eli asked, a teasing glint in his eyes.
"Don't stop. Eli. Don't stop," Claire begged, and with that, Eli thrust with a new force. A moan grew inside her
belly, reaching her throat and turned into a scream as it left her mouth. "Yes!"
Her climax already running through her body, Eli wrapped his arm around her knees, allowing his hand to travel. His thumb found her pulsating clitoris and flicked it at a rapid pace.
Only moments earlier, Claire thought she was in the throes of the most amazing sexual experience possible, but she was proven wrong as she crashed over an even bigger wave. Eli joined, his cock spasming inside of her, and Claire watched his expression lighten from concentration into bliss. He stilled for a moment, studying her face.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" Claire asked.
"You are crazy beautiful; you know that right?" Eli asked. Claire rolled her eyes, turning away. His hand pulled her chin to face him again. "I mean it. You are a goddess."
Claire could think of nothing to say. Her eyes pricked with tears that she blinked back. She would not ruin this moment by crying. When Eli said things like that to her, something inside of her believed him.
Eli pulled out of Claire, reaching for her hand and pulling her to her feet. He turned her around, holding her close in an embrace. She never wanted him to let go. He bent down and kissed her neck, then whispered in her ear, "I think we need another shower."
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Eli woke, his arm asleep. He moved to roll over, but Claire's head lay on his shoulder. To wake her or not to wake her? That was the question.
The month since Valentine's Day had been the happiest Eli could remember in many years. Every free moment on the weekends, he had spent at Claire's. Their days outside exploring the paths through the forest around her home, their evenings by a bonfire, and the rest of the hours in Claire's bedroom.
They still avoided conversations about the big stuff. What were they doing? Did she want to be serious? Did she want to tell her kids?
Eli should not have gotten involved with Claire. The thought hit him every time he left her house. But as long as they kept their relationship casual and to themselves, Ben would not be a problem. But every time he saw her, he forgot all the reasons they should not be together, and only thought of the reasons they should.
The problem was, as each day brought new memories, Eli was further convinced he did not want to keep their relationship quiet. He wanted her to bring the kids up to the brewery for dinner a few nights a week. He wanted to dance with her at Jack's wedding. He wanted to rebuild her damn kitchen.
They discussed everything else in the world. They talked about their childhoods, school, their ambitions in life. About ex-lovers. Claire's four years in the Air Force.
"I thought about joining the Marines when I got my GED," Eli had told her one night by the fire. "But it would have been about me getting away from my dad - not doing something for the greater good."
"I joined for a fresh start," Claire said. "Sure, I love my country - I would have found another way to get a fresh start if I didn't - but I joined for me. For my marriage."
Claire always seemed uncomfortable when she spoke about her marriage. Eli did not push, and he did not mention what he already knew.
One night while they lay in bed, Eli talked to her about moving to Seaside Cove and running a garage with his father -- leaving out all the illegal details.
"My dad's partner screwed him over in Johnsonburg and we lost everything," Eli said. "We moved here because he thought he had a good deal on the garage."
"Did you like working with your dad?" Claire asked.
Eli sighed. "He was a difficult man."
"What about your mother?" Claire kissed his chest.
"Once she was gone, she was gone."
He glanced at her alarm clock, four in the morning. He slid her head off his shoulder. She rolled over, and he waited to see if she woke. Claire breathed heavily again within seconds.
He moved his arm, wincing as the blood rushed to his fingertips. He should drive home and go back to sleep until his shift started that afternoon. But the bed was too warm. Claire's body too soft.
He placed his arm over her, and she snuggled into him. He drifted to sleep.
A pounding noise from outside the room woke Eli. He sat up, looking at the clock. Almost six, he heard the shower running through the cracked door. The early morning fog cleared from his head, and he recognized the pounding as knocking.
"Claire," he said, stepping into the bathroom and pulling his shirt on, "someone's at the door."
"What?" She peeked around the shower curtain. "Right now?"
Claire shut the water off, then she threw the curtain open. She put her short robe on and wrapped her wet hair in a towel. They walked into living room.
Claire peeked out the blinds. "It's Robert and the kids." She looked back at Eli, indecision in her eyes.
"Should I disappear?" he asked reluctantly. He did not want to leave. He wanted to stand next to her and announce his presence to Robert.
"It might be confusing for my kids."
"Yeah," Eli said. About her kids, not the ex. Her children came first, as he wished he had come first for his mother. "I'll be in the kitchen if you need me."
He stepped into the kitchen, closing the swinging door behind him. He leaned against the remaining counter and crossed his arms, listening.
"Claire Bear," a man said.
Claire Bear? Eli glowered. Robert. Eli had an urge to walk out there and stand at Claire's side, turn it into a pissing contest. He wanted to show Robert who was there now, taking care of Claire. But without Claire's permission, he stayed rooted to his spot.
"Whose truck is that?" Robert asked.
"What are you doing here?" Claire asked. "Hey sweetie, are you in your jammies? Do you want to go back to bed till we have to leave for school?"
A child's voice answered, too quiet for Eli to understand.
"I got called in," Robert said. "I've been texting you."
"My phone must be dead."
Eli listened to the shuffling sounds, doors opening and closing. Claire's voice was hushed; Eli could not make out the words.
"See?" Robert said. "No harm, they can go back to sleep for a few hours till you take them to school. So, you got a guy in here, Claire Bear?"
"A friend." A flutter of unwarranted irritation passed through Eli at her statement. "Where are you going, Robert?"
The kitchen door opened and a lanky man with light brown hair stepped into the room. Robert looked familiar as he walked straight to Eli, hand extended. "Robert Smith."
"Eli Dunlan." Eli begrudgingly shook Robert's hand.
"Eli Dunlan," Robert said, dropping Eli's hand, his brow furrowing in concentration. "Why does that name sound familiar?"
"Bridget," Eli said, remembering the night he had shown up at Bridget's house to surprise her. Recognition slammed over Robert's face.
"Oh, so what? Claire's like a payback fuck?" Robert chuckled.
Eli's hands fisted at his sides. He pushed the anger aside. Children slept in the next room.
"Excuse me?" Claire stepped in front of Robert, her hands on her hips. "What the hell's your problem?"
"Do you know?" Robert asked, smirking at Claire.
"How's the wrist?" Eli asked. He avoided Claire's gaze.
Robert took Claire's hand and she pulled it away. Eli stepped beside her.
"I was dating a woman last fall; do you remember?" Robert asked and Claire shrugged. "It turned out she had a boyfriend. He was a little on the poor side, real slow. Bridget was just using him for a good time, until I came along."
Robert could say whatever he wanted about Eli, he heard it all before. Robert's opinion, whatever Bridget might have said about him, none of that mattered.
"When I got to Bridget's house that night, Robert was sneaking out of her bedroom window. He fell off the roof, and broke his wrist," Eli said. He forced out a laugh. Of all the damned stupid coincidences.
"Wait, what?" Claire stepped away from both of them, backing into the refrigerator. Robert moved towards her, and she raised her hand. "You. G
o. You brought the kids over so you could go to work. Go."
"Claire Bear," Robert said, reaching for her hand again, and Claire jerked it away.
Eli stepped in front of Claire. "She said go."
Robert shrugged and walked out of the kitchen. Eli did not move until they heard Robert's truck speed out of the driveway.
"So, Bridget," Claire said. She looked angry with her lips pursed and brows pulled together.
"Claire," Eli said, "I didn't know he was your ex-husband."
"Eli-" she said, sounding tired.
"I'm not some sadistic fuck, Claire," he whispered. She needed to trust him. She touched his arm, then dropped her hand.
"I know you aren't," Claire said, pinching her brow between her fingers. "I'm not mad at you, Eli. It's this town. This town is too small. First Ben, now Bridget."
"They're other people. They aren't us," he said, tipping her chin so she looked at him.
"Eli, don't say us."
"Why?"
Claire sighed.
Eli pressed a light kiss on her mouth. "It's me and you. No one else matters."
"Mommy?" The kitchen door opened and Claire's daughter, Ella, stepped into the room. Claire pulled away from Eli and walked over to her. Ella stared at Eli with big brown eyes. "Who's that?"
"Go back to bed, sweetie. I'll be there in a few minutes to tuck you in, okay?" Claire bent down and kissed Ella on the forehead.
"Okay, Mommy." Ella smiled at Claire before pushing the door open and walking into the living room.
"Other people matter," Claire said, turning back to Eli. "My children matter."
"I didn't mean your children," Eli said, grabbing her hand. He was messing everything up.
"Eli, we're moving too fast-"
"I like you," he said. He pulled Claire against him, and she sighed, hugging him back. He was falling for her - faster than he thought it possible to fall. Not even that. He realized, he accepted a long time ago he might never fall in love.
