by Barbara Gee
“I feel bad that I was sleeping while you were out here fixing breakfast for me.”
“I’m an early riser anyway.” She poured him a mug of coffee. “Want some orange juice, too?”
“Nah, coffee is fine.” He took a bite of the biscuits and gravy, closing his eyes in appreciation. “Heavenly,” he declared, forking up a second bite.
“Good. How’s your head this morning?”
“I can barely feel it. Which is good, because I’m going to have to exert myself later to work off this breakfast. Seriously, Jo, this is the best.”
“There’s more here if you want it.”
“You aren’t eating?”
“I had granola and yogurt earlier. Not to make you feel guilty or anything,” she added with a teasing grin.
“I don’t think there’s any amount of guilt that could tear me away from this.”
Jolene sipped her own coffee. “I wish you could come to church with me, but Virgil and Kay will be there.”
“Yeah, I figured as much.” He studied her as he chewed. “Did you have any revelations on that subject overnight?”
She shook her head regretfully. “No, but I do find myself hoping your PI will discover you were actually the only baby who was switched, so you don’t have to worry about the effect your decision will have on others. That would be one less worry on your plate.”
He gave a soft grunt. “I suppose. I wish I’d never found out about any of it. Then the only thing on my plate would be the concussion, and it would appear all I need for that is you.”
Jolene bit the corner of her lip. “I can’t help thinking about Virgil and Kay, though, and for their sakes, I’m glad you found out. Not only because it’s their chance to get to know you, their son, but you’ll probably have kids of your own someday. That would be such an unexpected gift for them.”
“So you wouldn’t be a big fan of me just keeping my lips zipped?”
She sighed. “I admit my personal bias is influencing how I look at it, and yeah, I’d prefer if you levelled with Vigil and Kay. But I would never betray your confidence. If you decide that keeping quiet for now hurts fewer people, I’ll respect that decision.”
Boone locked eyes with her, and although he knew she meant what she said, she still couldn’t keep from tearing up.
“It would be tough for you, though. To spend so much time with Virgil and Kay and not tell them.” He shook his head. “I can’t ask that of you.”
“You can, actually. You warned me I was going to want to un-hear what you told me, but I wouldn’t let it go. So me being in this position is more my fault than yours.”
“No. Nothing is your fault. It’s my dad’s. His, and the doctors who switched babies for money. That’s really what it boils down to.” Boone was beginning to see his path a little more clearly. “And if what they did all those years ago ends up ruining their lives, they only have themselves to blame. They made that choice.”
“Love blinds us to right and wrong, sometimes,” Jolene said gently. “That obviously doesn’t excuse what your dad did, but it might help you to eventually forgive him.” She split two more biscuits and covered them with more gravy. “I need to get going, but you can hang around as long as you want.”
“Thanks, Jo. Not just for breakfast and the bed, but for listening, and for caring. You’ve been a good friend to me.”
“You’re special, Boone,” she said, her eyes soft. “I don’t think you realize it, but you are. And now that I know who your parents are, I’m not surprised. Virgil and Kay are the best, and you’re their blood. It’s exciting to know there’s another Desmond in the world.”
Boone dropped his eyes to his plate so she couldn’t see how her words affected him. Was he a Desmond, or a Kendall? What was the phrase—nature versus nurture? At the moment he definitely didn’t want to acknowledge the nurturing influence of the man who had raised him, but his mom, Carla, had done nothing but love him all his life. Whether he shared her blood or not, she was the biggest factor in making him who he was.
Jolene gathered up her purse and phone. “Kay always cooks lunch for the group of us on Sundays,” she said apologetically. “It would seem odd to everyone if I didn’t show. Otherwise I’d make a picnic lunch or something and we could hang out.”
He finished his breakfast and pushed his plate away, giving her a smile. “You don’t have to worry about me, Jolene. I’ll probably head to the rink and get some skating in. I think Donovan was planning to have open skate most of the day, so maybe some of the families will be hanging out and I can spend some time with them.”
“Don’t do anything too strenuous,” she warned.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said. “Have a good day. If you want to get together this evening, give me a buzz.”
She gave him a smile over her shoulder. “I might just do that. Bye, Boone.”
He watched her go. And he wished—oh man, he wished for so many things.
CHAPTER 17
Lunch had been tough for Jolene. She’d tried to act relaxed and normal, but it was almost impossible. Now that she knew the connection, she could easily pick up on similarities between Boone and his parents. He and Virgil had the same attractive grooves in their cheeks when they smiled, and the same eyebrows and eyes, although Virgil’s eyes were hazel rather than the jade of Boone’s. The physical resemblance ended there, however, as their face shapes and noses were different. Boone’s jaw was a little more square, his cheekbones a little more defined. Boone had the dark hair Kay had had in her youth, according to photos around the house, and she and Boone both tilted their heads slightly to the right when listening closely to someone speak. There was probably more that she didn’t notice, and she longed to see the three of them together.
As soon as lunch was over and the clean up was finished, she told the others she needed to get home to get some work done. Hank begged her to go riding with the rest of them, but she gently told him it would have to be another day. It’s not that she wouldn’t have enjoyed a nice ride, it’s just that she knew the more time she spent with her friends, the greater the chance they’d pick up on her unease and want an explanation.
So she returned home, only to be bored and miserable. She cleaned out a few cabinets in the kitchen, and the space under her bathroom sink that tended to be a catch-all for things like half empty shampoo bottles and old make-up. But nothing she did took away the longing to see Boone again.
She told herself that time away from him was in her best interest. She needed to ponder things without his distracting presence, and get her physical response to him a little more under control. She also needed to somehow figure out how to stop getting a little bit more attached to him every single time they were together.
All afternoon she told herself that…and she made it until five o’clock before texting him.
Can I take you up on that offer to get together this evening? I’m tired of my own company.
He responded quickly.
Thank God. I’ll expect you and a Ty’s Pie here within the hour. Then we’ll do something active so I don’t feel guilty about eating sausage gravy and pizza both in one day.
We can ride bikes to a big butte a few miles away, and climb it if you want. It’ll be a good change of pace for you.
Sounds great. See you in a bit.
Five minutes later her phone dinged again.
Heavy on the pepperoni. Does Ty make breadsticks, too? I need to carb-load if I’m gonna be climbing a mountain.
Jolene let her head fall back against the couch and grinned. The man was appealing in so many ways, and his sense of humor was right up there. Twenty minutes later she picked up a pepperoni pizza and a bag of warm, cheesy breadsticks. Boone would be pleased, and that made her happy.
She parked her car in front of his cabin, hoping that because his place was clear at the end of the row, her visit would go unnoticed by the other staff who lived nearby. His front door swung open before she could knock, and she caught her breath. Dre
ssed in shorts and his usual tight tee shirt, the man was positively mouth-watering. It got her every time.
He smiled a welcome and relieved her of the pizza box. “Want to eat at the picnic table in the back yard?” he asked, heading that way but checking over his shoulder to make sure she didn’t have any objection.
She gladly followed, because the evening was beautiful, with only a slight breeze. He had already placed napkins, plates, and bottles of green tea out on the table, and they sat down across from each other.
“I’m glad you texted me,” he told her. “I spent the morning and a couple hours after lunch at the rink, skating with a bunch of the kids. It was great, but my evening was looking a little long.”
“Mine too.” She slid a slice of pizza onto her plate and opened her tea. “I tried really hard not to text you, though.”
He plated his own slice and cocked his head. “Why?”
She told him the truth, because she wasn’t the type to play coy and mysterious. “Because I think I might be getting a little too attached. I knew it would probably be best to stay away, but my fingers had a mind of their own and before I knew it, the text was sent.”
He chuckled. “Don’t punish the fingers. We’re friends, Jo. There’s nothing wrong with friends wanting to spend the evening together.”
“No, but the more time I spend with you, the more tempted I am to try to move out of the friend zone,” she admitted.
He gave her a slow smile. “I’m still not seeing the problem.”
Jolene gave him a glare that was decidedly lacking in heat. She opened the bag of breadsticks, offering him one. “In other circumstances it might not be a problem, but you’ve got a lot going on in your life already. I don’t want to further complicate it. Plus, you’ll be leaving soon, so starting something would just cause me grief in the end.” She gave him a wry smile and waved a breadstick. “And yet, here I am.”
He smiled approvingly. “As always, I appreciate your honesty. Not many people in my life are willing to be so open with me.”
“I’m pretty good at blurting things out,” she said ruefully.
“One of the many things I like about you. And I do get what you’re saying. I’m obviously not in a real good place right now. Too many things are up in the air. So, yeah, maybe the timing is off, and the friend zone is where we need to stay for now. But I’m still glad you’re here, and I hope we can keep spending time together. You’re good for me, Jo.”
She swallowed a bite of pizza. “I guess as long as we’re both on the same page about it, we should be able to make it work.”
Boone’s gaze held hers. “Since I don’t want to give up your company, I’ll do my best to stay on that page with you. But since we’re being honest about things, I’ll tell you something straight up.”
Jolene raised her brows, waiting, a shiver going through her at the look in his eyes.
His voice was low and smooth. “There will come a time when I will be ready for more, Jolene. I don’t know if it’ll be while I’m still here, or after I return to St. Paul. It could be tomorrow, or six months from now. But I do know it’s going to happen.”
She froze and stared at him in shock, eyes wide and heart pounding. He took a bite of pizza and grinned while he chewed. “Don’t worry. I’ll warn you when my pursuit is about to begin.”
“So I can run?” she asked, her voice sounding strangled.
He gave a lazy shrug. “You can run if you want. But, I’m pretty fast. And I don’t give up easily.”
Jolene pressed her palms against the table top to stop the shaking. “Okay, um, this isn’t exactly helping to keep my mind in the zone.”
He chuckled. “Just giving you fair warning. Friend.” He put another slice of pizza on his plate and helped himself to a second breadstick. “So where’s this mountain we’re going to climb?”
Jolene couldn’t help but laugh, glad for the change of subject. “I never said mountain. It’s a butte. Not even the biggest one on the ranch, but it’s right by one of the roads and easily accessible by bike. And there’s a great view from the top.”
“Can we watch the sunset from up there?”
She shook her head, her dark eyes sparkling. “No, for two reasons. One, I don’t want to ride home in the dark. And two, I’m afraid watching a sunset would be a little too romantic for friends.”
“Ah ha. You think sunsets are romantic. I’ll store that in my memory bank for use in the future. When the time is right.”
Jolene sighed and pushed her empty plate aside. “Don’t keep talking about that, Boone. If you keep bringing it up, I’m going to keep thinking about it, and the more I think about it, the more it’s going to mess with my head. Let’s just take things day by day, okay?”
“Day by day it is,” he said agreeably. “So how was lunch at the ranch house?”
Her eyes widened with excitement. “Oh my word. It was all I could do not to stare at Virgil and Kay the whole time.” Jolene eagerly described the similarities she’d noticed between him and his birth parents.
Boone listened closely, but didn’t respond.
“What are you thinking?” she asked.
He finished his pizza and put his plate on top of hers. “You still think I should tell them,” he stated.
She nodded slowly. “I love Virgil and Kay so much, and they deserve to know you’re alive. But that’s just me. You have to do what you think is right, and I’ll do my best to support you no matter what you decide.”
He leaned forward, resting his forearms on the table, his hands clasped loosely. “You brought up something yesterday that I hadn’t thought of before. I’ve been focusing on the immediate future, like what will happen to my mom when Dad goes to prison. I hadn’t thought in terms of legacies until you brought up grandchildren. The Desmonds believe their family tree ends with them, and it seems awfully cruel not to let them know it doesn’t. Assuming I do have kids one day, how can I deprive them of their grandchildren?” He pressed his fingers against his temples. “But it’s going to destroy my mom, and possibly any number of others. People I don’t even know.”
Jolene reached out and hooked her hands around his wrists. “I think you should put any decisions on hold until after your PI finds out for sure if there are more families involved. That seems to be your biggest hang-up.”
“Yeah. I’d say that’s probably true.”
“So let Doug do his thing down in Texas. And try to take the pressure off yourself while he does it.”
He nodded thoughtfully. “I agree that doing anything before we know all the details would be jumping the gun. But as far as taking the pressure off, it’s real hard to shove it to the back of my mind. Especially when I’m alone and not busy.”
“Which is why I’m here. A nice bike ride with a friend will take your mind off things.”
“So let’s do it,” he said amiably.
She stood and picked up their plates to carry inside. “One word of warning, before we close this subject for the rest of the evening.”
“And that is?” Boone prompted, folding the empty pizza box in half.
“You’re probably going to run into Virgil and Kay before you’ve decided what to do. In fact, it’s almost certain you will, because they’re anxious to meet you and I think a dinner invitation to all of us is imminent. I just want you to be prepared for that.”
“I’ll try to get myself psyched up. No more panicked sprints out the back door, I promise.”
Jolene smiled. “You’re going to like them,” she said quietly. “And they’re going to love you, even if they don’t know you’re their son.”
CHAPTER 18
They climbed the butte and sat up there talking to within a half hour of the sun going down. It was tempting to stay for the sunset after all, but the bikes weren’t equipped with lights, and Jolene couldn’t take any chances with the star athlete in her care.
Back at his cabin, Boone broke out the container of brownies she’d sent home with him the
night before, and they ate them while sitting on the front porch steps, talking once again about hockey. Jolene had a wealth of statistics stored in her brain, and Boone enjoyed quizzing her. After he conceded that she could give even him a run for his money, she pumped her fist playfully, then stood and said she needed to get home.
He said goodnight and leaned against the porch railing, watching her go. It seemed like each time he was with her was better than the last, and he wondered how long that could continue. Would things eventually become mundane, or would his heart always leap at the sight of her?
He pondered that for a while, thinking for the hundredth time how different Jolene Tolley was from the women he was usually surrounded with. There was no question as to which kind of girl he preferred, and it scared him a little. He was used to avoiding women and coming up with excuses for why he couldn’t hang out, but with Jolene, he wanted to be with her all the time. He couldn’t seem to get enough of her presence.
Her tail lights disappeared from view and he went inside to take a shower and get ready for bed. His noticed his phone on the table, where he had left it before their ride. He stopped and tapped the screen. As usual he had a bunch of texts, but they could wait. There was a missed call, too, and he checked the number, realizing it was from his PI, Doug.
The tension that Jolene had dispelled now came flooding back. Boone started playing the voicemail Doug had left, not knowing quite what he hoped to hear. The last few updates hadn’t revealed anything new, but this time Doug sounded excited. He said he’d had a major breakthrough, and was confident he would soon have all the information Boone needed. He promised to call again soon with a more detailed report.
Boone listened to the voicemail again, then went and stood under the hot water for a long time. He knew he should be glad Doug was making progress, but instead he felt filled with dread. The sooner Doug gave him the information on who was involved, the sooner Boone would have to make a decision. After that, he knew, life would never be the same.
The burden once again felt too heavy.
