A Step to Nowhere

by Natasha A. Salnikova

  “Manhunt!” somebody yelled from the top floor. Peaceful life turned into catastrophe in front of my eyes. It looked like somebody was going to throw a bomb at the city. People ran from somewhere; cursing and yelling came from everywhere. The siren kept approaching and Steve grabbed my hand. His eyes were round with fear.

  “It’s for me,” I said. I couldn’t believe my words. It seemed as if everything was over. It was so peaceful here. Did I have to run again?

  “We can’t hide at Ronald’s and put his girlfriend in danger.” I pulled the gun out of my belt.

  “You can’t fight an army!” Steve pulled me to the car. “We’re getting away!”

  Before we reached the car, a man with a black beard jumped into it and raced away. Only gravel sprayed in the air.

  “How did he start it?” I yelled.

  People passed us, some were armed and it scared me like hell. What if they started shooting? Because of me? The “keep cool” attitude didn’t work.

  “Let’s go after them!” Steve screamed.

  I preferred to wait for Ronald, but dozens of police cars changed my mind. I ran after Steve. The roads were narrow here with many benches, gazebos, and trees. It wasn’t difficult to run around the impedimenta, but cars couldn’t do it. They dropped behind us.

  I ran again. Fourth time in one day. When I get back … if I get back, I’ll start running in marathons. I shouldn’t waste an experience like this. I was good at it, apparently.

  We flitted along with the panicking crowd, trying to outrun the cars. We turned into a narrow alley where no car would fit and ran into another courtyard with dragons and elves on the walls of the buildings, then another one. This one wasn’t bright, but looked like Ronald described the city before irnaners. Gray, gloomy houses, ditches on the road, overturned benches.

  We joined the crowd and burst in the walls of some airless place that looked like a barn. Inside, were wooden walls and a crowd of reeking, tattered people, who were pushing each other. A man stood with his back to me. His clothes were wet; drops of sweat streamed down his bald head. Steve pressed against me and I felt responsible for him. As if he was my younger brother or could be. I pulled him into this mess. It seemed I had developed a sense of guilt, but it still wasn’t my fault I came here. Somebody should have helped me!

  I heard coughs and whispers from all directions.

  “… What happened?”

  “…We didn’t have them here for ages, why today?”

  “… Pard!”

  “… I would ask you …”

  “… I hear that somebody from Planet Two sneaked in the corporation and then ran from there.”

  “… It can’t be! Tirrez!”

  “… I don’t believe it. Who told you that? Who told you this undura? It’s notless.”

  “…I heard they need organs.”

  “… What does it have to do with organs? What organs? They want to steal the machine.”

  “…. I’d say, let them take that pard. What do we get from it? Listen, what if they’re here? Among us?”

  “… That’s right! That’s why the dogs are here!”

  “... They should leave! We have enough pard without them! We have irnaners up to the top!”

  “… Don’t you care about them irnaners. They don’t do nothing bad, but they help us some.”

  “… They hide here too. They will take our people because of those spies. I heard they smell different. We would recognize them if they were here.”

  “… Not just smell. They look different.”

  Steve glanced at me and pressed his finger to his lips, even though I wasn’t going to yell – Hey! Can I introduce myself? I’m Sam laser-eyes from Planet Two! Yes, that’s me!

  I wasn’t going to introduce myself in any manner, but it was still nice to feel support, even if this support was shaking, pressing against my side like a dog during a thunderstorm.

  We smell different. Look who’s talking.

  One more man ran into the barn. He was old, his hair stuck out, his eyes were hazy. He looked high. What did they do to cause such an effect?

  “They’re coming here!” he yelled.

  I saw a gun barrel near me. The man who was holding it, pointed to my gun with a nod. I took it off safety.

  “We have more arms here,” he said. “We can do some dogs.” He spat on the floor, in the little space between us.

  “Please, don’t!” a woman begged on the other side of me. “They will kill us all.”

  The man bared his teeth.

  “Irnaners,” he barked. “Before them, no one stuck their noses here. They whine and they draw the dogs here. I haven’t seen you before.” He narrowed his eyes looking at me. “Newbie?”

  I nodded. Steve dug into my hand.

  “Please.” The woman folded her hands in a praying gesture. “I have two kids out there. I can’t die.”

  “They’ll get you anyway,” the man groaned. “You’re not …”

  He didn’t finish. The door of the barn squeaked and opened. All heads turned there … My heart stopped …

  In the threshold, there was Jason.

  He had something like an AK-47 in his hands (I had seen it in movies). He had a bulletproof vest, as far as I could tell. He slowly examined the crowd of scared people. One by one. The silence was sticky and bitter. No one moved, no one said a word. Only the man near me stepped from one foot to the other and raised his rifle a little. I prayed for him to not shoot before I’d shown myself. This man came for me and I didn’t want anyone to be hurt. I wasn’t suffering from extreme nobility, but it didn’t seem right. It was my fault after all, getting into this crap. I should get out of it myself. I shouldn’t involve people who didn’t have anything to do with it. Enough making excuses, calling myself a victim.

  Before I had time to raise my hand as I moved away from Steve, Jason raised his hand. Steve’s eyes became wide; he shook his head looking at me.

  “Not you.” Jason pointed to someone in the crowd. “Not you.” One more person could take a breath. “No, not you, not you, not you.”

  His eyes locked with mine. I’d known him so well. I’d known his habits, fears, likes. He relied on me for everything. His look was always filled with love, loyalty, kindness. That Jason, from my world. The look of this Jason was hard and cold, like the blade of a knife. It didn’t have hatred, only ruthlessness and confidence that my Jason lacked. I would give anything to see him now. I wanted him to hug me, as he’d always done in times when my emotions flew over the edge. It usually followed some stressful situation and he called everyone else an idiot and I was the best. Why didn’t I love him?

  Why are we always late to appreciate people who aren’t outstanding with special characteristics, but who make our lives better without asking anything in return? Racing after a dream, we miss the opportunity to just live. We don’t value destiny’s gifts, looking for something bigger, better, and worthy of our individual and unique personality.

  Steve grabbed my arm and squeezed it. I smiled at my lover’s double, removed the hand holding my arm, and stepped forward. I was scared, but they had to wait a long time to see my fear.

  “No one has ever insisted on having a date with me with such determination,” I said. Jason screwed his eyes. “I prefer French food and I’d like to change. Do you mind?”

  The crowd parted before me, whispers followed.

  “… Is it her?”

  “… She’s from Planet Two?”

  “… Pard!”

  “… Does she look familiar to you?”

  “… She’s just like us! Like us!

  “… Oh, mother of Mar! She’s from Planet Two!”

  “… Don’t touch her, idiot!”

  Jason didn’t move from his spot. When I approached him, he grabbed my arm, and pulled me out of the barn to the street. The door slammed with a bang. I turned around and saw dozens of eyes staring at me through gaps in the cracked, wooden boards. There were about a dozen hunters in
black. Their outfits looked different from the ones I’d seen before. They had high collars covering their necks, gloves, heavy boots, and helmets. They rather looked like our soldiers and maybe they had been. They also could reflect our S.W.A.T. Both were bad for me. Jason was a leader here, even though his uniform wasn’t black, but dark-green, darker than the police had.

  Without saying a word, just looking into my eyes, he lowered his weapon and it hung on his shoulder. He pulled my gun out of my hand (luckily I didn’t have time to use it) and pushed it behind his wide, leather belt. Then he turned me with my back to him, twisted my arms, and put handcuffs on me. They squeaked quietly, locking around my wrists and I thought that their handcuffs were more advanced than ours. This was the world where the Middle Ages walked hand in hand with inventions of the new century.

  “You’re not going to read me my rights?” I asked. There was no answer.

  I expected the man to push me on my back, but he circled around me, so I could take a look at him, and nodded to the soldiers. They parted and I went to the car with Jason. His colleague, the one who tried to shoot me on the road, opened the car door for the backseat.

  “This planet produces such fine gentlemen,” I said, and with a smile, I got into the car. The man didn’t say anything. The door shut before my face.

  CHAPTER 20

  The men didn’t talk when we left The City of Lost. Jason contacted someone, using the flat little thing that looked like a phone. “We have her,” he said.

  We have her.

  Her—was me. Samantha Bristow—a law offender. A criminal. Samantha Bristow wasn’t dangerous anymore. The city and the country could rest peacefully.

  I looked at the back of the men’s heads through the glass partition that was separating perps like me from representatives of the law. The glass hadn’t been cleaned for days, or maybe months. Fingerprints, dry saliva, even a couple of wads of old chewing gum were covering its surface. Fortunately, the backseat didn’t stink of sweat or smoke, otherwise I’d get sick. The visual level was enough.

  I wasn’t scared anymore, even though I should have been by all logical accounts. They caught me and were taking me to some place that wasn’t going to be a banquet in honor of my visit to Planet One. They weren’t going to take me back home. They most likely were going to take me back to the corporation and finish me off. Kill me. Neither the word kill, nor the pleasant opportunity of being killed had any effect on me, because I was with Jason. Yes, of course, my boyfriend and this guy only looked like each other, but they looked absolutely identical and I couldn’t make myself believe that Jason, even this Jason, would hurt me. Especially, because he let me go the first time, by Velma’s house. Maybe he didn’t recognize me. I looked at his dark hair and remembered how we met.

  My friend Aisha was the one who initiated it. She’d always set me up with someone or at least tried to. She was married, with two kids who were born two years after college, and she couldn’t accept the fact that I was single and could do whatever I wanted with my time. She wanted us to be equal, so we could talk about kids and men driving us crazy. She reminded me about my biological clock, about me not getting younger, and that everyone was married and had kids, but me. She cared about my fate as a wife more than I did. I should note that Aisha wasn’t the only one sticking her nose in my business. My mom would win the lead. I tolerated my friend because she was funny about it, but everyone else had gotten a mental or verbal middle finger. Aisha had known about my insane (there was no better word for it) feelings for Ray. She didn’t know him, but called my attitude toward men “Ray check”. She was right. I compared all the guys to him and no one could handle the competition. I met young and not that young men, the ones Aisha somehow found for me, but they rarely could make it to the second date. Sometimes I would bring men home for sex. I’m a human and not really a moral type. I brought them, but they had never stayed overnight. Jason was Aisha’s last hope, she said. If she had known how glad I was to hear those words, she would smack me silly.

  I liked his looks right away. His eyes were brown and I had a weak spot for this color; his hair was dark. He was tall and had wide shoulders. I had to admit that he was better looking than Ray, even though Ray was handsome. But it was not all about looks. Jason was a very good looking guy, but he didn’t have the charisma and energy that Ray radiated.

  It was a regular meeting, nothing romantic. At Aisha’s birthday party. She arranged the seats, putting me and Jason together, but we settled across the table from each other and exchanged glances all night long, to my friend’s happiness. It seemed that she’d forgotten the reason people came to her house because she watched us like a mother cat. I didn’t think about Ray that night, except for comparing the two guys in the beginning.

  We ate, danced, laughed, and wished happy birthday to the birthday girl. When it was time to go home I had little doubt that Jason would accompany me to the car. He only drilled me with his eyes and didn’t initiate it. By that time I’d poured enough champagne and wine into myself to lose all shame. I didn’t have much anyway. I was almost thrusting myself upon him, when my caring friend passed in front of me.

  “Jason!” she said, planting her hands on her hips, “Sam is leaving. Alone. Do you want her to go outside on the empty street and face criminals, who are just waiting for their next victims? To the world where every step can become a tragedy? Do you want to be responsible for that?”

  That’s how she talked, my friend Aisha. That was one of the qualities I liked about her and I forgave her sense of righteousness.

  I wanted to object, tell her that I have a pepper spray and any criminal waiting for me had better look further, but Jason jumped up as if he’d been kicked.

  “Sure, sure. Sam, I’ll walk you out.”

  We said good-bye to everyone and entered the elevator. Aisha and her family resided on the twenty-first floor. It could be a long and boring ride. Especially if one present male didn’t do what was expected from him and one present female was frankly drunk. It was not like I drank a lot or often, but the stars connected that way on that day. What could I do? So, somewhere between the floors, I turned to him and asked, while rocking on my unconfident legs.

  “What are you waiting for?”

  “Huh?”

  “Are we going to kiss or do you not like me?”

  Jason blinked and wanted to answer, but didn’t have time for it. I pulled him closer and kissed him.

  The next day I was, of course, embarrassed. I tried to explain that I’d never done anything like that, but Jason only laughed, assuring me that he liked it. I should note that I liked it, too. At that moment I liked his looks and manners. It seemed so unusual, touching and romantic when a guy didn’t attack you at the first opportunity. I guess for me it was so unusual that I, myself, asked him for a second date. Then it was the third. How do you like that? Three days before he felt comfortable enough to invite me.

  “We’re almost there.”

  I shuddered.

  “What?”

  “We are almost there,” said the confident and firm Jason from Planet One. What if it had been him in that elevator?

  “So what?” I moved my arms behind my back. They had started getting numb from the handcuffs. I didn’t want to make jokes or ask questions. I didn’t want to talk to him. What if he was going to tell me my fate? It wasn’t going to change anything. I had to reconcile with the fact that I was going to be killed and I wanted to do it alone. I didn’t need them bothering me.

  “I just wanted to let you know that we only follow orders,” Jason said. “We were ordered to capture you and deliver you to the appointed location.”

  His colleague looked at him sideways. Hmmm. What was their relationship?

  “I know your double on my planet,” I said without any goal in mind. Just said it out.

  “It’s not going to help you,” Jason’s partner said.

  “I’m not trying to manipulate you, if that’s what you think.” I tried to si
t more comfortably, lifted my legs onto the seat, and brought my knees to my chest. It wasn’t really comfortable, but I stayed in this position. “It’s just interesting. You look like two drops of water. Jason and I were going to get married.”

  Now both hunters looked at each other.

  “You know my name.”

  I rolled my eyes.

  “What part of the sentence couldn’t you understand? My boyfriend, whom you have the honor of looking like, has the same name as yours. How else could I learn your name? Do you understand now or I should spell it out for you?”

  Jason suddenly started to laugh.

  “Careful!” his partner screamed when the car swerved from the road.

  “I don’t remember when people talked like this. Rude!” he said through tears. “I don’t remember talk such as this from any live person.”

  I understood what he meant, but if I’d started to bite, I couldn’t stop. Especially, since he’d helped me with his reminder about their orders.

  “Do you talk only to ghosts?” I asked. “I can understand that. With that facial expression, any live person would try to stay away.”

  “What facial expression do I have?” Jason, it seemed, found my flat sense of humor rather amusing, because he was dying from laughter and his partner gripped the handle over the door.

  “You look like somebody dropped a brick on your foot and you’re about to finish off half of the city.”

  I didn’t say anything funny to my knowledge. Absolutely; I wanted to needle, not to joke. As one could understand, I wasn’t in a joking mood for many reasons. Jason though, started to laugh even harder. He even had to get off the road and stop at the curb. His partner turned to me, and then looked at Jason, who dropped his head on the wheel so I could only see his shaking back, and then the second man laughed, too. Probably in a different situation I would join the fun, as it usually happened, but if one considered the goal of my destination, throbbing hands, and the start of a headache, one would understand why I was waiting for the hysterics to die. Jason’s partner calmed down first, then my boyfriend’s double. He turned to me, wiping the tears and snorting.