Alien in the Family

by Gini Koch

  Alpha Four was pretty amazing—deserts, yes, but they were beautiful, more than Earth’s. The seas were blue, and the industry was mature and functioning. Every part of the world was rich in something, and it seemed prosperous.

  The images on Victoria’s super-IMAX changed, and we saw the solar system. I’d seen it before, six months ago when ACE had moved through me to join Gower. It was an intricate and intriguing place, each planet moving in a strange dance with the others. Victoria showed us glimpses of the other worlds as well, each different from Earth, each one fascinating in its own right.

  She returned us to the palace and what I assumed was the royal city where the king would live. It was beautiful, impressive, lush. Nothing like a room in the Dulce Science Center or Caliente Base. A very little bit like what Martini Manor was like, but on a grander, better scale.

  Now we saw the people, and it was odd to see so many of them. They all looked pretty great to human eyes, though I could tell some were happier than others. In fact, it was clear that not all the people were happy.

  Victoria closed her hands and the images disappeared. “See what you would rule over? Alpha Four leads the other planets. You would be the most powerful man in this galaxy. You could do whatever you wished, bring your family here, do more than that.”

  “Like what?” Martini asked. “You showed me a lot of nice things. I saw the people making them happen. It’s not all perfect here.”

  Leonidas shrugged. “Then come rule us and make changes. The king’s word is law—you could enact any reforms you felt were needed.” I didn’t doubt that Leonidas had an entire list of suggested reforms on hand. If he was truly as Alexander had described, I figured Leonidas was praying Martini would say yes, because he’d finally get as king the kind of leader he was himself—the good kind.

  I tried not to think about what Martini was going to choose. He was a protector, had been all his life, and now an entire solar system needed him. A solar system I couldn’t stay in. The one thing I knew Adolphus had said that was true was that I’d failed the tests for marriage. Martini couldn’t be king here and marry me. But then, he was the person who’d really taught me that the good of the many comes before the good of the few.

  Queen Renata was next to Martini, and she whispered something in his ear. He nodded, and she whispered some more. He nodded again, then Queen Renata went and spoke to Christopher, Gower, and Michael.

  Martini looked around. Christopher, Gower, and Michael were next to him. “I’d like to see what the others in the bloodline have to say about this.”

  Christopher nodded and stepped forward with Michael’s help. “I respectfully decline the kingship of Alpha Four, for me and the descendants of my line. I will serve Alpha Four if my acknowledged leader serves or requests it, and I will not if he does not.” He put his hand on Martini’s shoulder.

  Michael helped his brother get to Martini’s other side. “I speak for my brother and myself,” Gower said. “We respectfully decline the kingship of Alpha Four, for us and all the descendants in our lines. We will serve Alpha Four if our acknowledged leader serves or requests it, and we will not if he does not.” Like Christopher, he put his hand on Martini’s other shoulder.

  Victoria and Leonidas looked back at Martini. “The others have declined,” he said. “You are the only hope our world, our system has. What is your decision?”

  Martini didn’t look at them when he answered. He looked straight at me. “I respectfully decline the kingship of Alpha Four, for me and all descendants in my line. I have another life, and it doesn’t belong here, so neither do I.”

  CHAPTER 56

  I MANAGED NOT TO BURST INTO TEARS. ACE is allowing Jeff access to Kitty’s feelings again.

  Thanks, big guy.

  Victoria was standing there in shock. Leonidas didn’t look shocked—he looked worried, and a little hopeful, at least when he glanced at Alexander.

  I took a deep breath, let it out, and felt in control enough to talk. “Think that covers the Earth blood. Alex, what’s your plan?”

  “I respectfully dec—”

  “Dude! Not a good plan!”

  He looked at me in confusion. “But . . . I don’t want it.” I saw Leonidas out of the corner of my eye—he was tensed and focused. I could practically feel him trying to influence Alexander’s decision. But no worries, that’s what I was there for, and unlike the Chief Councillor, there weren’t any repercussions they could use against me.

  “Alex, want has nothing to do with responsibility. You know why Jeff and the others declined? Because this world is no longer their responsibility—Earth is. But this is your world, and these are your people. Leadership isn’t about wanting—that’s what screwed up your great-uncle. Jeff and Christopher don’t want to have to run everything—they do it because they’re the best at what they do, and our world needs them.”

  “I don’t want to rule the way my great-uncle did,” Alexander said.

  “That’s a great start. But there’s only one way to achieve that.”

  He gave me a long look. “I thought I could stay with all of you.”

  I shrugged. “Unlock the freaking gate. I’m sure we’d be open to the occasional visit back and forth. Provided both sides called first and made sure their respective houses were cleaned and tidied.”

  “Alexander has already refused the crown,” Victoria said quietly.

  “So what? Unless this world’s ready to hail Queen Victoria, then they’d better hail King Alexander pronto. Or else I have a queen standing right down there who could probably rule this planet as well as her own.” Queen Renata grinned at me.

  “There is precedent,” Leonidas said. “From centuries ago. But since Alexander has refused the crown already, the people must agree.” He sounded worried.

  “Not the Poofs?”

  Leonidas pointed to one of the Poofs. “This one has accepted Alexander.” How he knew I had no idea, but I assumed they had their ways. The Poof so identified purred, loudly, which seemed to make both Leonidas and Victoria happy. This was really a freak world. “Therefore, the only remaining protocol would be approval by the majority.”

  The chanting started softly. It was started by our guys—Tim and Reader specifically—but no one seemed to notice. I didn’t mind. By the time it grew loud, everyone was chanting it. “King Alexander!”

  “Does that work?” I asked Leonidas.

  He nodded and smiled. “Yes. I believe we can safely say the majority of the population have approved the new king.”

  “Democracy along with the monarchy. Nice.”

  “It works for us . . . when the right monarchs are in place.” I noted Leonidas hadn’t projected that for the crowd. “Thank you.”

  I didn’t reply because Chuckie had helped Alexander get up the stairs to join us. “Nice display of calm.” ACE didn’t broadcast this. Thank God. “Am I a bad man to admit I was hoping Martini would accept the crown?”

  “No, I’d have been sort of hurt otherwise.”

  Chuckie grinned at me, then turned to Victoria. “Your Highness, here’s your son. Alexander, nice meeting you. Remember that the C.I.A. is now watching you.”

  Victoria hugged Alexander and started crying. I looked at Chuckie and raised my eyebrow. He gave me a very nice smile and an almost imperceptible nod. I was impressed and hoped the bugs worked long range. It was Chuckie, of course, so the likelihood was high that they would.

  Alexander laughed. “What can I do to thank you?”

  “Well, start with no longer making us the dumping ground for all your freaking problems.” I thought of something. “ACE, remove the Alpha Four Ozone Shield. Leave the ones up on the other worlds, though.” My voice was projecting again. I looked up and saw a shimmering high up in the sky that broke apart and disappeared.

  There were gasps of horror from the crowd. “Oh, you don’t like that? Well, here’s what Earth doesn’t like. We’re really freaking tired of being the Alpha Four trash bin. That’s over now. Deal
with your own parasitic superbeings. We’ll tell you how, if you want to send an emissary, Alex. One that we approve and who doesn’t come disguised and to do damage to us.”

  Chuckie nodded. “Earth has more weapons than perhaps you’re aware of. Don’t put up another PPB net around us; don’t interfere with us any more. We like the A-Cs we have, and if you asked nicely about immigration, we might consider letting you come on over. But we will exterminate with extreme prejudice anyone coming to make us your battlefield ever again.” He was talking to Alexander but looking at Leonidas. I got the impression they were communicating on the super-smart-guy channel in some way.

  Alexander nodded. “Your requests are fair, even the removal of the Ozone Shield. Once we know the parasitic threat has truly stopped, we can put it up again. And, perhaps, share it with you as well.”

  “That we would appreciate.” I looked around. “Time for us to go.”

  “Already?” Victoria sounded shocked. “But you just arrived. None of you from Earth have been here before. You are that uninterested in other worlds?”

  “Hardly. We’re hot and heavy for the new world experience. We’re also battered and banged up, and some of us have things to do and all. We know the way here now, if you catch my drift.”

  “I will open the gate to you,” Alexander said. “You will be able to come when you choose or have need.” He looked a little lost. Victoria still looked shocked. Leonidas looked as though he was fine with our taking off.

  I spit in my hand and held it out to Alexander. “Spit.” He looked at me like I was crazy. So did Victoria and Leonidas. Chuckie started to laugh. “Dude, spit. It’s gross enough.” He spit, gingerly, in my hand. I grabbed his hand and shook, did the whole gangsta thing. It was really impressive in a totally icky way. Alexander tried not to gag. “It was spit or blood. You’re bleeding but I’m not, so . . .” He nodded. I figured he was afraid he’d barf if he talked. “Pinky up.”

  “What?” he asked weakly.

  I raised mine. “Pinky. Up. How hard are these instructions?” He did as I said. I wrapped our pinkies. “Earth and Alpha Four—we have each other’s backs from now on. Agree?”

  Alexander looked at Chuckie. Who grinned. “Agree and say the same thing.”

  Alexander nodded. “Yes. Earth and Alpha Four, we have each other’s backs from now on. Agree?”

  “Yes.” I shook our pinkies. Alexander still looked confused. Victoria looked more shocked. Leonidas looked as though he was trying not to laugh. I looked at Chuckie. “Aliens are weird.” I let go of Alexander’s hand. He wiped his on his shirt. I wiped mine on his shirt, too.

  “What was that about?” he asked me.

  I shrugged. “We could do the whole long diplomatic crap and argue over pieces of paper for decades, but it all comes down to the spit shake or the blood oath and the pinky swear. They’re as binding as any piece of paper and, honestly, probably work better.”

  “We are allies now?” Alexander seemed very confused. Leonidas, however, looked quietly pleased.

  “Yeah! See? The first thing you did as the new king was create an alliance with Earth. Dude, you rock!”

  Chuckie coughed. “I’ll send you a note about the ramifications, Your Majesty.”

  “Thanks, Charles. I think I’ll need it.”

  “I believe I’d like a copy as well,” Leonidas said.

  “Absolutely.” Chuckie and Leonidas were smiling pleasantly at each other. I got the distinct impression they were weighing and examining each other in a lot of ways I was missing. “Are you staying on as King Alexander’s Chief Councillor?” Chuckie asked finally. He didn’t sound as though he was going to disapprove if Leonidas said yes, but I also wasn’t sure if he’d disapprove if Leonidas said no.

  Leonidas shrugged. “That’s up to His Majesty.”

  “And the people,” Alexander added.

  Either ACE had projected this or Victoria or Leonidas had, because I heard murmuring from the crowd. They seemed pleased.

  “Oh, I’m sure the people will be very happy with Chief Councillor Leonidas staying on,” Chuckie said. “From what you’ve said, he has the people’s well-being foremost in his mind.”

  Leonidas gave Chuckie one of their formal little head bows. “From what we’ve seen, Mister Reynolds, you function in a similar capacity.” Even knowing they’d been spying on us for a long time, it was still a shock to hear him use Chuckie’s name as if they’d been introduced.

  I tried to figure out how what someone in the C.I.A., even Chuckie, did could be compared to what Leonidas did, but before I could, Alexander’s face lit up. “Maybe you could stay here and become my adviser?”

  Chuckie looked interested. I could guess that some others with us were, too. And, surprisingly, Leonidas didn’t seem against the idea. “That could prove helpful. I’m sure we could learn a great deal from each other.”

  Chuckie opened his mouth. I beat him to the reply. “No.”

  “No?” Chuckie and Alexander chorused. The unison thing was getting to me. Too many alpha males in small spaces equaled bad for Kitty’s sense of propriety.

  “No. Because you have to learn to do it on your own. Could Chuckie stay and help you guys out? Sure, he’d be awesome. Some of the others would, as well. But you need to rebuild Alpha Four, not rebuild it into Earth: The Alpha Four Experience. Maybe once you’re stabilized. Let’s see how you do on your own before we send one of the guys we need to you, okay?”

  Alexander nodded. “That makes sense.”

  “It does?” Chuckie asked.

  “Yes. Besides, I think Alexander has a Chief Councillor here already who knows what’s going on in this solar system a lot better than any of us, even you, would.” Leonidas gave me a pleasant smile. “And I don’t want said Chief Councillor learning even more about us than he already knows.”

  His eyes narrowed, though his expression remained pleasant. “I don’t follow you.”

  I snorted. “You’d learn as much from Chuckie as he’d learn from you. That’s great, but now’s not the time. You all need to prove that we can trust you before you get to pick this particular brilliant brain.”

  Leonidas gave me a long look. “Understood.” He cleared his throat, straightened up, and bowed to Alexander. “Your Majesty, if you are willing, I would be happy to stay on as Chief Councillor.” It was clear from what he did and how he said it that this was an official moment of protocol, and that the response wasn’t in question.

  Alexander gave the little head bow. “It would be an honor for us if you would remain in this position of responsibility, respect, and confidence.”

  I could feel the crowd around us relax. “You sure this is the right way?” Chuckie asked me quietly.”

  “Yes. You can spend your summer vacation here another time. Now shut up, and let’s go home.”

  Is Kitty ready? ACE asked politely.

  I looked around. Almost. “Victoria, what happens with the Poofs?”

  There was much Poof mewling and whining at this question. One of the Poofs, the one Leonidas has identified as Alexander’s, jumped onto his shoulder. The others scattered—back to Martini, Christopher, Reader, and Michael. Poofikins stayed with me. The last one whined and jumped onto Chuckie’s shoulder.

  Victoria chuckled. “They are attached.”

  “I’m not from Alpha Four, and I’m also not marrying in,” Chuckie said.

  She shrugged. “Attached Poofs pine without the one they are attached to with them. Harlie was listless for close to fifty years. If it is attached to you, it’s yours. Take it as our gift of thanks.”

  “Thanks, I think.” Chuckie seemed confused.

  “You named it, didn’t you?”

  He shrugged. “Calling it ‘it’ or ‘you’ seemed stupid.”

  “What’s its name?”

  He coughed and mumbled something.

  “What? Missed that.”

  He glared at me. I stared him down. “Fluffy.”

  I ran through all t
he things I could say. “Fitting.”

  “Yeah.” Fluffy purred at Chuckie. “Fine, yeah, back in the pocket.” Fluffy disappeared.

  Victoria smiled. “They attach to the one who names them.”

  I hadn’t considered Poofikins a name, but, apparently, it was. Worked for me. “You sure you can spare them, though? Tenley’s been around a while, right?”

  “Yes, but they can live for hundreds of years.” I heard Martini groan. “We will be fine with the two we have. And, if not, we can always ask one of you to visit.”

  “Wow, Poof breeding. A new career option. Has to be better than this saving the world stuff.”

  “Is there money in it?” Chuckie asked.

  “Doubtful, but who knows?” Victoria laughed. “You think strangely.”

  “Welcome to hanging with humans.”

  Tito bowed to everyone. I hugged Alexander and Victoria and shook hands with Leonidas. Chuckie tried to shake hands with Victoria and Alexander, but they both hugged him. I thought about it. “I’m sure everyone else would like to say good-bye. Would you mind walking down to them? Under the circumstances, I mean.”

  “Of course.” Alexander headed down with Tito’s help, Victoria went after him. Leonidas, on the other hand, stayed put.

  “Mister Reynolds, before you go . . .” Leonidas gave Chuckie a hug, in a manly way, but it lasted a lot longer than normal. I was positive he was whispering something in Chuckie’s ear. Of course, the fact that Chuckie nodded when they were done, then winked at me, was a clue, too.

  “Do I want to know?”

  “Tell you later, boss girl.”

  “Yes, you will.” We went down to the others. Leonidas still stayed put. As we walked, he started talking. Sounded like the typical “bad things have happened but we’ve overcome, and we have a great new king and he rocks” speech. There were no hints that Alpha Four might want to retaliate or argue about our taking down their ozone shield. I hoped that would remain the case, but I wasn’t prepared to place a bet on it.

  Michael was done with his part in the farewell hugging, and his Poof was sitting on his shoulder. I thought about it. “So Paul didn’t name the Poof who was with him during the fighting?”