Cop Out

by KC Burn

  Kurt didn’t quite know why Davy looked almost ashamed. Or guilty. Maybe….

  “Did you want to talk now? I doubt we’ll be interrupted by my well-meaning family.”

  “Can I kiss you first?”

  Oh. He felt a little throb in his groin. It was too soon for him to be even thinking about sex, but it was nice to know everything worked.

  “Yes, please.” Kurt couldn’t wait until they could do more than kiss. It felt like he’d been waiting a lifetime for Davy. “Oh, wait… it’s been, like, three days since I brushed my teeth.”

  Davy gave him a funny little smile. “We’re in a hospital. We’re not playing tonsil hockey.” Davy nibbled at his jaw before moving those soft lips to his and nibbling there.

  Kurt returned the kiss, perversely upset Davy wasn’t trying for a more intense kiss.

  “If I move over, will you lie down next to me?”

  “I don’t want to hurt you.”

  “Please.”

  After a few painful seconds, Kurt carved out a Davy-sized spot on the narrow, uncomfortable bed. Davy placed his arms gently around Kurt, and he was able to relax.

  “So, talk,” Kurt invited.

  “Where to begin? I went to a counselor, like you suggested. I wasn’t going to. I was actually quite pissed at you. Jon finally convinced me it was a good idea. I… uh… may have told Jon everything too.”

  Oh. That should be interesting next time he was in Jon’s presence. “Go on.”

  “Well, I learned a lot about myself and my relationship with Ben. I also learned that I ended up blaming you for a lot of things Ben did; a type of transference, I guess. Also, you helped me through some bad times, and it was a little emasculating even as I was beginning to care for you. I felt like I was betraying Ben, I felt stupid for wanting a straight guy—a straight guy who’d seen me at my worst—and I was afraid I didn’t know how to function on my own. Until that night at my house, I didn’t know you were attracted to me. But then, my attraction got mixed up with anger… and I was simply awful to you. I hope you can forgive me.”

  Snuggling a little closer to Davy’s warm, thin body, Kurt sighed. “I’d already come to the conclusion neither of us were ready for our encounter. I, well, I’d never been attracted to a guy until I met you. I wasn’t even sure if what I was feeling was true sexual attraction. I struggled with what I felt for you, until that night, when Andrew made me so fucking mad. But it happened, and although I regret what came after, it was the best sex of my life. Partly because I was already in love with you, although I sure as hell hadn’t admitted that to myself.”

  As Kurt spoke, Davy propped up on one arm to look incredulously at him.

  “Oh, my God. I feel terrible. You’d never been attracted to a guy before? You’d never had sex with one before? Holy shit. I thought you were so deeply in the closet that, because of all the shit I was going through, I hadn’t noticed. Made me so mad.” Davy closed his eyes. “Oh, Kurt. I can’t believe it. I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

  Kurt snorted. “Did you not hear me? Best. Sex. Ever. I could have done without the big dramatic fight and you not returning my calls.”

  Davy flushed fire-engine red. “I’m sorry.”

  “And, the day I got your test results… let’s just say I’ve had better days. It never occurred to me to use a condom.”

  “I’m sorry about that too. I was so ashamed when I realized I hadn’t used a condom. Ben and I had been monogamous, hadn’t used a condom in years. But I should have protected you.”

  Those words should have sent Kurt’s hackles up, but he was starting to realize a relationship meant protecting each other, because you couldn’t bear for your partner to hurt.

  “Honestly, until I opened that envelope, my only thought had been that I couldn’t get pregnant. Maybe I should have sent you mine too?” The etiquette of that still escaped him.

  Davy shook his head. “You get departmental testing, right? I wasn’t worried about you. And I didn’t want you to worry about me. I should have called or wrote a note, but I was scared. I thought you’d have gone home and realized you hated me… or the sex….”

  “I love you, remember? Even my mom knows. I couldn’t have asked for a better initiation. Except that I never got to touch you. Suck your cock.” Something poked at Kurt’s side and Davy squirmed. He grinned. It was getting easier to read these signals. Just needed to use the cock as a barometer. But then, he remembered his transgressions, and his own cheeks heated.

  “So, uh, I think the whole point of this discussion is that we want to be together, right?”

  Davy nodded.

  “Well, uh, I should probably tell you a few things too. Before we make any decisions.”

  Kurt kept nothing back, not the drinking, not the erratic behavior, not his coming out, not Ian’s reaction, and not his interlude with Justin. When he was done, he searched Davy’s face, wondering what he thought.

  “Let me get this straight. You came out, because of me. You texted me every week to let me know you were thinking of me, even though I never returned any of your messages. You left me that beautiful rose, which I dried and still have. Knowing you were out there and still thinking of me helped me—more than I can ever tell you—work through my issues. You thought I never wanted to see you again. You don’t hate me because I let you go through that all alone. And yet you think a hand job from a stranger will make me think twice about loving you?”

  “Uh.” Kurt wasn’t quite able to process anything other than Davy saying he loved him.

  “Oh, Kurt. Most guys in your situation would have fucked anything and anyone that spread for them. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful you didn’t. But I don’t blame you for Justin.”

  The words were finally filtering in. This was really happening. The pain in his chest was absolutely nothing compared to his overwhelming need to be kissing Davy. He wrapped a hand around Davy’s neck and pulled him down, meeting his lips in a hungry kiss.

  Davy moaned, and forgot about his “no tonsil hockey in the hospital” edict. Kurt sighed into the kiss before sending his tongue to duel with Davy’s.

  They were both panting when Davy lifted his head. “God, I want you.”

  “Not here, though, eh?” Regret laced his tone.

  Smiling down at him, Davy trailed his fingers over his forehead, smoothing into his hair. “No, not here. At home, later.”

  “Home?”

  “I know we have still have some things to work out, and dating… well, the more I think about it, the more I realize we were dating, but neither of us were aware of it. So, I want you to live with me. I want to take care of you, help you recover. I want to be there for you when you get home from a long day.”

  Live with Davy. He’d hated his apartment for months, and he could admit it now—because it didn’t have Davy. He’d always felt comfortable in Davy’s place, felt at home. The thought of being there all the time filled him with joy.

  “Are you sure? My hours are weird, and often long. I might have to cancel plans last minute.” Being a cop was hard on a relationship.

  Davy snorted and kissed his forehead. “Uh, yes, Kurt, I know that.”

  Oh, yeah, of course he did. He’d lived with a cop for ten years.

  “But about that, I’m not sure… no, never mind.”

  “What?” He sure as hell wasn’t going to make this kind of commitment if he didn’t address Davy’s reservations, first.

  “Maybe we should wait to discuss this.” Davy buried his face in Kurt’s neck.

  “No. I’m awake, you’re awake, and I want to know what you’re concerned about.”

  Davy stayed in that position so long, he began to wonder if he’d fallen asleep again.

  “I’m scared. You’ve been injured twice now, and we both know that you could have been killed,” Davy mumbled against his neck.

  He twisted his head, ignoring the stretch of muscles that went down into his chest, and managed to kiss the top of Davy’s head wh
ile he sorted through his thoughts. “I know it’s hard. The waiting, the worry of seeing a cop at the door. It’s why there’s such a huge divorce rate. And you have to know I’m not a fan of getting injured. I do what I can to avoid it. Probably I should just refuse these damned task forces. Homicide isn’t usually quite as dangerous.”

  “Wait. You got hurt on a task force?” Davy propped himself up again and stared down.

  “Yep. This time.” His injuries had been more coincidental than anything, and last time, well, no one had been out for revenge on him.

  “No more. Please. I think… I think I can handle it, if you don’t do that.”

  “Okay. I’ll talk to my boss.” There would be time to discuss the future of his career later. Kurt loved his job and was good at it, but he didn’t want to be one of those sad divorce statistics. He already knew what it was like to live without Davy, and it was fucking ugly—they both deserved some happiness, and he wasn’t going to lose it for anything. If Davy truly couldn’t handle his work, they’d find something else for him to do.

  “Then yes, I’ll do it. I’ll move in.” And he wasn’t even scared. It was right, it was good, and even the pain of losing Ian’s friendship and respect would be easier to bear with Davy’s love.

  Dimples blazing, Davy kissed him, gently at first, then morphing into something wild and hot. Davy’s hand snuck below the thin blanket and smoothed a palm up Kurt’s bare leg, underneath Kurt’s oh-so-attractive hospital gown. But Kurt couldn’t argue with the easy access. Injudiciously, he reached for Davy’s groin and groaned… in pain, before he fell back. Davy released him instantly and broke their kiss.

  “Oh, Kurt, I’m so sorry.”

  Sweat popped out on his forehead and sadly, his cock deflated.

  “Nope, don’t be sorry. But I am going to need a bit more recovery time, I think.”

  Davy snuggled back against him, pressing light kisses against his shoulder, thin chest heaving as he let his arousal fade away. Davy’s breathing evened out, and he slipped into sleep.

  Warmer and more content than he’d been in months, Kurt let himself sleep too.

  “Hey, squirt, wake up.”

  Kurt’s eyes flew open. “What the fuck, Mike?” Who woke the guy recovering from a GSW?

  “I’m guessing that’s the boyfriend, eh, squirt?”

  Davy was still warm and asleep beside him. Did Mike lie about not caring, now that he was confronted with visual proof his baby brother was gay? Kurt thrust his chin out at his brother. “Yeah, so what?”

  “Jeez, who pissed in your cereal this morning?” Kurt’s stomach growled. “Oh, I see. You’re grouchy when you’re hungry. Anyway. Mom’s on her way up. I’m guessing she won’t consider this conducive to your recovery.” Mike’s finger waved between him and Davy. “And the rest of the family is with her.”

  Sudden tension thrummed through Davy, and he knew Davy was awake and aware. Through the open door, Kurt heard his family’s voices. Davy did, too, but he didn’t leap out of bed in time. His hair stuck up all over. He looked guilty and terrified and stunned. Kurt just wanted him to cuddle back up beside him—his side was all cold now—but he refused to release Davy’s hand, and after a few seconds, Davy stopped trying to pull away.

  Mike looked him up and down. “What’s your name, boyfriend?” he asked as Dylan and his sisters trooped into the room ahead of his parents. And halted, all of them staring at Davy and their twined fingers.

  “Davy,” he whispered.

  “Mike, lay off.”

  Mike turned his icy gaze on Kurt. “Squirt, he hurt you. He wasn’t there for you.”

  “I know, big bro. There’s… things you don’t know, and I hurt him too. But we’ve worked it out. We love each other. I’m moving in with him.”

  There was a collective gasp from the women.

  Mike’s glance flickered over Davy and back to Kurt. Kurt looked up for Davy’s reaction, stunned by the sweet, warm smile Davy directed at him.

  Erin pushed past Mike, giving him a swat on the back of the head. “Stop pretending to be dad. Hi, I’m Erin… Davy, mom said?”

  She hugged him, Davy looking terrified and gratified all at once.

  By the time the nurse came in to kick out his excess visitors, Davy had grown a lot more comfortable with his loud, rambunctious, and affectionate family. In fact, Kurt had a suspicion Davy was looking forward to being part of a large family. Although he might change his mind once he ended up in a room with all the significant others, nieces, and nephews. His immediate family could be overwhelming, never mind the additions they’d made over the years.

  He just wished Ian could see his way clear to come visit, and he said as much to his mom.

  “He’ll come around. He was here, when you were in surgery. Worried about you. I don’t know what’s got into that boy, but he’ll come around.”

  “I don’t know, Mom. Is he avoiding you too?”

  “I never see you younger boys as much as I’d like. Too busy with your partying and dating and work.”

  Work. Yep, that was certainly his issue. Not partying or dating.

  “I guess that will change, at least once Dylan is married.”

  His mother gave him a long look. “I’ll be expecting you and Davy to be making regular appearances too. And of course, we’ll all help get you moved in and settled. After all, you won’t be able to lift anything for a while.”

  “Thanks, Mom.”

  “Baby, you just worry about getting better.”

  Davy came back to his side after his family left to grab some lunch. “I like your family.”

  “They like you too.”

  “All except Ian.”

  Kurt’s nostrils flared. “My mom says he’ll come around.”

  “But you don’t believe that.”

  Did he? He couldn’t believe Ian would throw away their kinship over this, but he’d heard a lot worse stories. “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”

  “I’m sorry. I feel like it’s all my fault.”

  “No. Don’t be sorry for what we found. I’m not. I love you.”

  “I love you too. You’re getting tired. I’m going to let you sleep, go back to the house, get it ready for you.” Davy gave him a swift kiss and broke off with a mock glare when Kurt tried to deepen it. “Sleep, you.”

  “Or what?” Kurt asked suggestively.

  Heat filled Davy’s gaze. “I’ll think of something. But whatever I come up with, you won’t get a chance to enjoy unless you get better, got it?”

  Kurt never knew he’d like having someone take charge sexually the way Davy did, nor would he have expected it of his boyfriend… lover… partner… before he’d experienced it. But he loved it. Loved Davy. Smiling, he kept his gaze glued to the admirable curve of the ass he couldn’t wait to touch, until it disappeared from view.

  A year ago, Kurt had been lower than he’d ever been, but if it weren’t for that shitty, shitty time, he’d never have this elation, this love.

  Epilogue

  Simon stretched, fingertips almost touching the ceiling. He only had a few splotches of paint on him, whereas Jon, Rick, and Davy all had multicolored streaks. “I’m going to go out and pick up some pizzas. I’ll be back in a few.”

  “Wuss.” Kurt shifted his position on the sofa as Simon raised a brow.

  “You’re just lucky you’re still recuperating. Otherwise you’d be doing all this painting yourself.” Simon threw a water-soaked rag at Kurt’s head, which hit with a wet slap.

  Davy laughed and sank down beside Kurt. “I think it’s time for a little break. We’ve all been working hard.”

  “Me too. Supervising is hard work.” Kurt grinned at his lover. He moved in right after he got out of the hospital, and it had been a couple of weeks, but they’d slipped back into their easy comfort with each other, like they’d never been apart, like they’d always lived together. Some things were new—Kurt now accompanied Davy on his bimonthly visits to Ben’s mom, he canceled his g
ym membership, and Sandra started telling Oliver about his Uncle Kurt.

  Even better, though, was the reintroduction of blowjobs in his life. God. Blowjobs had never been so good. He’d quickly found he liked giving them as much, maybe even more than receiving. Davy in the throes of orgasm was more gorgeous and gratifying than anything he’d ever seen.

  Which was why he was looking forward to getting rid of their friends as soon as humanly possible. Kurt’s doctor okayed the more energetic stuff yesterday—it had been killing them both to wait—but Kurt had wanted to keep it a surprise, and Davy got stuck late at work. He couldn’t cancel the painting party, but man, every time Davy moved, Kurt’s cock responded. He could not wait to get his man alone.