It Was Always You

by Scarlet Rose

  Jessie’s eyes were piercing me, her nostrils were flared…she knew what I was saying, but she was waiting for me to actually use the words.

  “Jess, it has to be you. I need to pretend that I was married to you the whole time. Kylie would never be able to fight against a woman who has been a part of my life for ten years.” I said.

  Jessie didn’t reply. She continued staring at me like she’d seen a ghost. I thought I’d made a mistake. It was too much to ask, even of someone like Jessie.

  “All we have to do is get married, for a few months and play ‘house’. Maybe give a few publicized interviews and Kylie has no proof of anything anyway. I never texted or emailed her, there are no photos of us together.” I added, but Jessie still hadn’t said a word.

  “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come to you with this. Forget I said anything. I’ll find someone else.” I said quickly because the color was draining from Jessie’s cheeks.

  “I’ll do it!” she snapped, her eyes wild.

  “What?” I asked.

  “I said I’ll do it. I’ll marry you and pretend that we have an actual thing going. I’ll do it for you, Leo.” she replied. “Of course I will.”

  I felt a huge burden lift from my shoulders, and my first instinct was to pull her into my arms and kiss her. But that would have been inappropriate. Besides, Jessie knew me too well. She knew all my faults and all my inadequacies. I would never be good enough for her.

  4

  Jessie

  Leo and I were married in three days. He was able to pull some strings and get the certificate for us. Neither did we actually have to go to a registrar’s office, and neither was the date correct. According to our certificate, we had been married for six months.

  Everything happened so fast since that night at the bar that I could barely keep up. Now, I was married to Leo Cormack, a dream I had often fantasized about in my head, but the reality saddened me.

  This was not the marriage I had pictured for us. The only reason he asked me to marry him was to help him save his company. The last thing Leo wanted was for the company to fall into his cousin Marcus’ hands.

  He organized for all my stuff to be moved from my apartment to his stately Tudor home, In a neighborhood, I would never have been able to afford. Even though Leo and I were friends, we came from very different worlds.

  I still didn’t know how exactly we had become friends in college. All I could remember was that the two of us naturally gravitated towards us each other in class. At the time, we were both sleeping with other people, but we were hanging out with each other more than our partners.

  And it continued for the next ten years. We spoke every day. We met each other at least four to five times a week. In my world, there was nobody as important as Leo was, but I still couldn’t tell him I wanted more. If in ten years, he had given me no indication that he had feelings for me too…what was the point in confessing my love now?

  It was only when I had arranged all my clothes in Leo’s massive walk-in closet that I had the opportunity to stand back and breathe while I stared at them. Leo was in the house with me, making phone calls downstairs to business associates. He was still trying to get confirmation from clients who would stick with him no matter what.

  What was I doing here? I saw my clothes neatly arranged and hanging beside his. I could sense trouble.

  We were going to share a house together. Would we sleep in the same bed? To what extent would Leo go to prove to people that we were in an actual happy marriage? Why had I agreed to do this? What more was I capable of agreeing to?

  Leo appeared behind me at the door. I caught him from the corner of my eyes.

  “Hi.” he said softly, and I turned to look at him. He was standing there in his dark jeans and shirt with the sleeves rolled up. His hands were stuffed in the pockets of his jeans.

  “You look all settled in.” he said.

  I smiled but couldn’t say anything. I was beginning to grow frightened of my own feelings now.

  “Thanks again, Jessie, for doing this. You know it means the world to me. If there is anything I can do for you…absolutely anything…”

  We were staring at each other, me in wonder and Leo in gratefulness. He looked much calmer now that he had a plan.

  “I’m fine, Leo, thanks. I don’t need anything. I just wanted to make sure that you knew I can’t give up my job. I still have to go to the office every day.” I told him, trying to distract myself from my own racing heart.

  “Of course, yes, I wouldn’t expect you to. I’m not that kind of husband.” he said, and a broad smile cracked on his handsome face. I wanted him to kiss me, to take me right there in the closet. Now that we were technically married…I shook my head, trying to drive those thoughts out of my head.

  “I’ve arranged for an interview. Tomorrow evening with E News.” he told me.

  “An interview?”

  “Yeah, just a short interview to introduce you to the media and public as my wife. I’m sure you’ll handle it.” he explained.

  I nodded, fidgeting with my hands as I stood there. What else did I expect? I should have known what I’d signed up for.

  “I’ll make sure they’re not too hard on us, especially you. Having you there, telling them your side of the story, will help me gain the sympathy vote.” Leo continued. I nodded.

  “Yeah, sure, just tell me what to say. We should get our story straight before we go on air.” I said. Leo nodded and smiled.

  It was late evening, and I was already tired after the day’s moving and unpacking. My mind was still racing with thoughts of him, and I felt like I needed a break.

  “I think I’m going to go to bed early tonight.” I said.

  Something had changed between us. I could feel it. We had become more formal with each other. Neither of us was laughing too much. It was like we both knew that things could never go back to normal after this, no matter how much we tried.

  “Sure. You should take this room, my bedroom. I’ll be sleeping in the guest room down the hall.”

  I gulped, my throat had gone dry. So, we weren’t going to be sharing a bed. It made sense. I had moved all my stuff in here so that if anyone ever walked into this room, they would see all our things together. But that didn’t mean that we had to share the bed too. Leo had no intention of taking advantage of the situation, that wasn’t the kind of guy he was.

  A part of me wished that he was.

  “Goodnight, Jessie, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for you.” he said, smiling at me.

  “Goodnight Leo, you don’t need to keep thanking me.” I told him, and then he walked away.

  5

  Leo

  I woke up the next morning to the smell of coffee and eggs in the air. Jessie was cooking breakfast.

  I put on my jeans and went to the kitchen to find her there. She was wearing a slinky silk blouse with spaghetti-thin sleeves. I could sense she had no bra on, her nipples pebbled softly under the material, making my cock move. I should have put a shirt on, I thought.

  Her shorts were tiny, riding up to the top of her thighs. Her butt moved cutely as she stirred the scrambled eggs.

  “Morning.” I said, and she looked over her shoulders. Even this early in the morning; Jessie looked fresh as a daisy, beautiful without any makeup on, the tops of her cheeks red.

  “Hey, you. Coffee?” she asked, and I sat down at the breakfast bar. She brought over the pot of coffee and poured it into a mug. She knew I liked my eggs scrambled as much as she did.

  “Sorry if I woke you. I’m in a rush, don’t want to be late for work.” she spoke.

  I felt dizzy, sitting there, watching her cook breakfast for me. I could get used to this. Her face being the first thing I saw every morning. My house filled with the sound of her voice…with the smell of her.

  She filled two plates with the eggs and buttered some toasts and brought them over to me.

  “How are you feeling today, Jess?” I asked as she sat down ac
ross from me.

  “Me? I’m fine.” she replied, and her eyes drifted over me.

  This wasn’t the first time she was seeing me shirtless, but this time her gaze seemed to linger on my abs for longer. What was she thinking? I was too nervous to ask her. For ten years, I hadn’t made a move on her in fear of being shot down. I couldn’t lose her. I couldn’t risk it.

  “About the interview this evening.” I reminded her, and she nodded while she drank her coffee.

  “I think I’ll manage just fine. You can take the lead.” she replied.

  “And I just wanted to warn you that…” I didn’t know how to tell her.

  “That we need to act like a couple in love?” she asked, a soft smile grazing her face. I ran a hand through my hair, grinning.

  “Don’t worry, I’m good at acting. I’ll manage. I think we should hold hands throughout the interview.” she added.

  “Yeah, that’s a good idea.” I said.

  “And we should stick to the story that we met in college, that we’ve been in love with each other ever since.” she continued.

  I could feel my muscles starting to freeze up. She was hitting too close to home. I didn’t know how to look at her without giving my feelings away.

  “Yup.” was all I could manage.

  “And that a year ago, we finally found the courage to confess our feelings to each other and we had a quick wedding.” she said.

  “Yeah, we wanted to keep it simple and personal. I’ve already spoken to Liam and Nate, and they said they’ll confirm to be witnesses if they’re ever asked.” I told her.

  Jessie was drinking her coffee, not meeting my eyes. This was proving to be uncomfortable and strange for us both. These past ten years, I had tried so hard not to mess up our friendship…and there was a high possibility that this was precisely what I was doing now.

  Would I end up losing Jessie after this?

  How could we be friends once this was over? Once she’d seen exactly what I was capable of doing to get what I wanted.

  She stood up, walking over to the kitchen sink to deposit her empty plate and mug. I followed her with mine. Our arms grazed when we placed the dishes in the sink, and I felt a shot of electricity run up my spine. Like someone had pulled the reigns on me. My face whipped around to look at her, and she was looking at me too.

  This wasn’t the first time I was touching her either, but somehow this time it felt different. She was my wife. Jessica Andrews was the woman I had married. At least according to my marriage certificate.

  She stepped away from me like she’d been burned.

  “Jessie…” I said, stepping towards her. I didn’t want to frighten her.

  She looked at me nervously, tucking in her hair behind her ears. I knew she’d felt that spark too. There was electricity running through both our veins.

  “I should be going. I need to get to work.” she mumbled. The closer I got to her, the more she leaned, arching her back over the kitchen counter in response.

  “Maybe we should set some ground rules. I don’t want to end up hurting you, Jess.” I said.

  She shook her head, licking her lips with worry.

  “You’re not going to hurt me, Leo. I’ll be fine. This will all be over in a few months. Then we can get back to our normal lives. What matters now is your legacy.” she said, but her voice was small and weak.

  I could feel an irresistible urge to touch her, to run my hand along her legs. But I knew I couldn’t do it…not without completely ruining our friendship.

  “Yeah, you’re right, which is why we need rules.” I stated, in a deep guttural growl. Could she see the desire in my eyes?

  “I don’t believe in rules, Leo. We don’t need them. We’re not children.” she said and swerved around me, getting away from me before I could do anything. I should have known. She was going to avoid any hint of taking this further.

  “I’ll meet you at the studios after work. Hope you have a nice day, Leo.” she called out as she rushed to the bedroom. I just stood there, feeling like I should have found a way to make her stay.

  6

  Jessie

  I was nervous at the studio. The whole day at the office, I’d thought of very little else. This was the first time we were going to publicly acknowledge the fact that Leo and I were now husband and wife. It sounded crazy in my head. I refused to believe that anyone would buy it. People would see straight through us.

  I’d picked out a simple and classy blue knee-length dress, and I made sure my short shoulder length hair looked neat and in place. Despite how famous and newsworthy my best friend was, I had always managed to stay out of the limelight.

  Leo seemed at ease under the harsh glare of the studio lights. He wore a dark gray suit for the occasion, tailor-made to suit him to perfection. He was freshly shaved and smelling divine.

  The interviewer, a girl called Milly Stevens, who I saw on TV a lot, settled down in a chair in front of us. Leo grabbed my hand as we took our seats, settling in close beside me so that one side of my body pressed tightly against his.

  While the crew made their final arrangements, Leo leaned into me, allowing his lips to softly graze my earlobe.

  “You’ll do fine, Jessie. I trust you.” he whispered and squeezed my hand.

  Moments later, the cameras started rolling, and Milly began the interview. I was glad for Leo’s presence, glad for my hand in his. I wouldn’t have been able to sit through even the first few minutes of this interview if I wasn’t holding on to him for support. Just like he did, I trusted him too.

  Milly began by asking us simple questions about our relationship, the most obvious ones.

  “We were all in shock to hear that you are in fact a married man, Leo.” she began.

  I looked at him, at the natural, comfortable expression on his face. He looked like a man who would not be fazed by anything.

  “I thought it was time that I broke my silence. There has been a lot being said about me in the media, I’m being publicly put on trial based on someone else’s words. I’ve kept my silence all this time, but in the interest of my wife’s sanity and mine, I thought I should finally say something.”

  Milly turned to me.

  “I understand, Jessica, that you and Leo have known each other for a long time?”

  “Nearly ten years, yes. We met in college, and we’ve been best friends ever since.” This bit was easy because it was true.

  “And you’ve been married six months?”

  “Yes, a year ago, we confessed our feelings to each other, and it was the most natural thing to do. There is nobody in the world who knows me or loves me, the way Leo does.” I replied, feeling the words chocking me heavily. If only it were true…

  Milly smiled. Had she bought it?

  “And what did you think of what Ms Kylie Musgrave had to say about your husband?”

  I breathed in deeply. I’d rehearsed these lines all day.

  “I thought it was laughable. I was aware that they knew each other, that they’d met socially at parties, but I also knew that she was exaggerating. Those three months that she claims my husband spent with her; we were still on our honeymoon in the Maldives, and when we returned, Leo and I were spending a lot of time together. He couldn’t have been with her at the same time.” I said.

  This was only half-true. Of course we were not on our honeymoon, but it was true that we spent a lot of time together. I knew for a fact that Kylie was lying because Leo and I were together, and he rarely ever saw her.

  Milly asked him some questions next, and he followed up the story with more details about our supposed marriage. I didn’t know how I was doing, but I could see that he was doing very well. Not once did he take his hand away from me.

  “Well, I have to say, that the two of you look very much in love.” Milly continued, smiling more fully now.

  Had we really managed to pull it off?

  “I wouldn’t have said anything, but I know how the scandal has been affecting her. I
don’t want Jessica to come under attack just because of some lies someone else has said about me. I don’t wish Ms Musgrave any ill, but I would appreciate it if she didn’t attack me personally.” Leo replied.

  I tried to keep calm. The interview was going to come to an end soon.

  Milly said her parting words.

  “I wish you all the best Mr and Mrs Cormack, and a happy marriage.”

  Leo and I thanked her, and while the cameras were still rolling, he turned to me, leaning into me.

  Before I realized what he was going to do, his lips were on mine. I gasped lightly as our mouths fuzed and I felt his tongue slide in. It was a quick kiss, but smooth and gentle. Leo made it seem, for the cameras, that he’d been kissing me all his life. When the truth was that this was the first time it happened.

  I was breathless as he smacked his mouth away from me. I could have cried out from the feelings rushing through my veins.

  Milly was smiling at us, then the cameras stopped rolling and Leo stood up. I remained sitting there, in shock, feeling disoriented.

  I had fantasized about our first kiss for ten years, and now it finally happened, in front of the whole world when I least expected it.

  The worst part was that it hadn’t meant anything to him.

  7

  Leo

  Jessie was angry with me.

  Since we kissed, she had barely spoken a word to me. She put on the show, just like she was supposed to. Held my hand out of the studio and all the way to the chauffeur driven car that was waiting for us. But on the ride back to the house, she said nothing and kept her face turned from me.

  Now, she zoomed past me and straight to the kitchen. I followed her, hoping I hadn’t ruined everything.

  She looked beautiful, even when she was angry. I’d always noticed that about her. She clambered around the kitchen, banging shut cupboards and slamming pots and pans together and eventually she dumped a load of pasta in a pan to boil.