Montana Secret Santa

by Debra Salonen

  Krista couldn’t feel her toes by the time she walked into Jonah’s living room and headed straight to the fireplace. She took a few seconds to greet River Jack and Bear, but a few seconds later she was perched on an ottoman, stocking feet inches from the lovely fire.

  Jonah joined her, two cups of herbal tea in hand.

  Bindi jumped to her pillow on the couch and closed her eyes with a weary sigh. She’d been a huge hit with Harry Monroe’s younger siblings. “That was so smart of you to bring Bindi.”

  “It was her idea.”

  “Of course. I forgot. You’re a modest genius.”

  He snickered but didn’t say anything. Instead, he settled on the rug in front of the fire and took her left foot in his hands. He gently peeled down the three layers of socks she’d worn inside her fur-lined boots and raised her foot to his cheek. “Ye gods, woman, have you no circulation?”

  “I was outside for hours. Give me a break.”

  He massaged her foot to get the blood flowing. Tiny pinpricks in her toes made her wince. “You need to take better care of yourself. Why didn’t you go inside with the others?”

  Honored guests, including Harry’s parents and the Secret Santa members, had been invited into the fire house for refreshments after the choir finished singing and the last image in the slideshow faded to black. “Do you want to know the real reason I didn’t go in?”

  He nodded.

  “Because I don’t cry in public. It’s a rule.”

  He made a face. “Whose rule?”

  “Mine.”

  “It’s a dumb rule.”

  She jerked her foot out of his hands and curled it under her. “I beg your pardon.”

  He shrugged and reached for her other foot. “Emotions happen. They remind you you’re alive and you care about something enough to give a damn. Tears make us human.”

  He yanked off her stockings and began to ply her sole with his strong, powerful thumbs.

  “Are you saying that by preferring to keep my emotions private, I’m somehow less human than people who weep publically?”

  “No. I’m saying it’s okay to cry to in public. I certainly wouldn’t think any less of a person who did. If I broke down, would you think less of me?”

  She stared at his hands tenderly massaging her icy toes. “I can’t believe we’re arguing about this. Why are we arguing? We did something good tonight. I’m proud of us.”

  “Me, too. Your slideshow was amazing.”

  “The tree was spectacular. The best display in town.”

  He let go of her foot and eased backward to rest against the sofa, taking his mug with him. “It turned out well. Montana Secret Santa is in the black, and from the promises I was getting all evening, we could be looking at a very healthy budget to start off next year.”

  Wiggling her toes in front of the fire, she sighed with relief as the warmth took hold. “Frostbite averted. Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  They sat in silence, only the sounds of the fire popping and Bindi snoring in the background. Krista was exhausted—physically and emotionally—but there was something she had to get off her chest before he left.

  She couldn’t ask outright—it would hurt too much if he said no, so she took her usual businesslike approach. “What if we have an emergency Secret Santa request come in? Are you sure you have to leave? I don’t want you to go simply because you think I don’t want to introduce you to my family. That isn’t the case.”

  His left eyebrow rose in question. “You do want to introduce me to your family?”

  Too soon. Too much room for disaster. “I would prefer it if we’d been seeing each other for the past year. Or two. I know them and I’m afraid meeting them will make you run in the opposite direction with barely a peck on my cheek on the way past.”

  “Is there something you’re not telling me? Are they zombies?”

  She jabbed his boot with her big toe. “Did you see the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding? If they were filming next week, they’d call it My Big Fat Jewish Puerto Rican Christmas. I know them and I live in Montana. What does that tell you?”

  “It tells me you’re unsure about our relationship—which you have every right to be. Everyone says the holidays are a terrible time to get involved with someone new. That’s partly why I’m leaving.”

  “What’s the other part?”

  “I’d rather not say.”

  “Why?”

  “It’s personal. Something I have to do for a friend. An unofficial Secret Santa thing.”

  She crossed her arms and waited but he closed his eyes and softly hummed some stupid Christmas carol. Off-key.

  His eyes flew up. “I almost forgot. I have a small present for you. I know we said we wouldn’t do this, but how could I give the other volunteers a gift and not you?”

  She groaned, which made Bear lift his head and look at her with genuine concern in his eyes. “I’m okay, boy. Go back to sleep. Sorry.” She was really going to miss this dog when her dog-sitting days were over.

  Jonah sprang to his feet and disappeared down the hallway. He returned a few minutes later with a vibrant red gift bag adorned with the image of a giant white cup of hot cocoa with a heart made of tiny marshmallows in the center.

  “This is adorable. You know me well.”

  “I’m glad you think so. Reach inside.”

  The thing her fingers touched was a solid object with hard sides, about the size of a medium note pad. She ripped off the plain brown tissue wrapper to find a book entitled, How to Train Your Beagle.

  He held up his hands. “Not everybody’s a natural like me.”

  She pretended to pitch it at his head. He ducked, but both knew she was kidding. “Thank you.”

  “There’s more.”

  Next out was a plastic tub of diet doggie treats. “I’m beginning to see a theme.”

  “I want them to love you. And I want your stay with them to go as smoothly as possible.”

  She actually felt touched by his thoughtfulness. “That’s very sweet. Thank you. And my future charges thank you, too.”

  A handsomely wrapped box the size of a tie box held a fuzzy alpaca scarf, obviously hand-knitted. She put two fingers into one of the obviously intentional holes and looked at Jonah, questioningly.

  “It’s for Jack. I had the alpaca lady… um… Serena James come out and measure him. He loved the attention. Remember me talking to her at the stroll? You feed his leash through the holes so the scarf stays around his neck.”

  She remembered feeling a tiny bit put out that he’d struck up a conversation with the beautiful vendor while Krista had been talking to Amanda and Tucker.

  Guilt made her blush. “It’s quite beautiful.”

  Jonah beamed. “I knew you’d get it. There’s one more thing in there.”

  She looked but didn’t see any boxes or wrapped packages, but on closer scrutiny, she spotted a plain white envelope lying flat on the bottom of the bag. If he hadn’t pointed her to it, she would have thrown it away with the bag.

  She set the bag aside and moved to Jonah’s side, although she chose to sit on the couch instead of the floor. The little girl who loved presents wanted to rip open the envelope to see what it contained, but the grown woman who had been disappointed more times than she cared to remember took her time easing one finger under the flap.

  “And they say molasses is slow in winter.”

  She stuck her tongue out at him. “Fine. Here goes.”

  The envelope gave a satisfying ripping sound, which dropped the two pieces of paper inside straight to her lap. She picked up the top one and turned it over. An airline ticket to Fiji. Open dates with her full name typed on the passenger line. She grabbed the other. Exactly the same, except in the space for the passenger name was the initials: TBN. To Be Named.

  Her jaw hung wide for several seconds until she shook her head and said, “How is this possible? You can’t have a ticket without names and dates and flight numbers.�
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  “You can if it’s a private jet. You don’t have to declare your passenger list until you set up the flight plan.”

  “Really? Why Fiji?”

  “I heard you mention to one of the Santa ladies. They were talking about exotic destinations and you said, “I’ve always wanted to visit Fiji.”

  Her cheeks turned hot. Her exact words had been, “I’ve always wanted to honeymoon in Fiji.”

  He moved to the spot beside her. “These are your tickets. You get to pick who you take with you. It doesn’t have to be me, although, of course, I would love to go with you.”

  No pressure. No proposal.

  She didn’t know whether to be relieved or hurt.

  Relieved. Naturally.

  She dropped to her knees beside him and put her arms around his neck. “You’re the smartest man I’ve ever known. This is a great gift. Thank you. January will probably be crazy at work, but maybe February. Would that work for you?”

  He kissed her with the same passion she’d be dreaming about the whole time he was gone. When they came up for air, he said, “I’m retired remember. Well, sort of. I have one small thing to clear up after Christmas, then I’m all yours.”

  She wished she believed that.

  And who knew? Maybe after the first of the year, when life went back to normal, they’d give this relationship thing another try—without all the pitfalls and land mines of the holidays.

  She scrambled to her feet and held out a hand to Jonah. They didn’t have a lot of time but they had tonight. And she had a thank-you in mind that would knock his socks off.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The day after Christmas

  Krista took a sip from her mug and looked around Jonah’s mother’s spotless kitchen. She’d finished washing and drying the last of the pots and pans a few minutes earlier, having left the gigantic mess untouched the night before.

  “We did it, doggies. We hosted a dinner for eight and survived to tell about it.”

  Her mother had opted to keep her vacation rental house for the family to stay in. Since the place wasn’t pet friendly, Krista had opted to sleep at Jonah’s parent’s house. As high-end as the rental was, she found everyone seemed to prefer the comfortable, welcoming hominess of the Andrews’ place.

  Cooking a complete meal in a strange kitchen had tested her culinary skills to the max, but she’d somehow pulled it off, with a little help from her friends.

  Dessert had been a delightful trifle courtesy of Louise Jenkins. “My granddaughters love this. I simply doubled the recipe.”

  The prime rib had been perfect thanks to Tucker Montgomery, who cooked and delivered the gorgeous hunk of meat, medium rare, with time to rest—Amanda’s gift to her since she knew how badly Krista was stressing about the meal.

  “Tucker’s grilling one for us on the super high-tech grill he got from Santa. He can do two just as easy. That way all you have to do is the sides.”

  Krista and her sisters had pulled together salads, garlic mashed potatoes, a variety of vegetables, and a cornbread recipe Mom insisted had belonged to her grandmother. Everything had come off beautifully. Afterward, they’d bundled up Bindi, put leashes on all the dogs—including Jack’s sporty new scarf—and walked around Marietta.

  As a family.

  On the most beautiful Montana Christmas day she could have wished for. The only thing—the only one—missing was Jonah.

  He’d sent her a link to a video clip of him playing Frisbee on the sand with his niece and nephew. She’d had to fight back tears. Which, naturally, her mother had spotted.

  “You like this guy, don’t you?” Mom asked, linking arms to let the rest of the group keep walking.

  “Yes.”

  “Do you think he might be the guy?”

  “It’s too early to tell, Mom. We’ve only known each other a few weeks, and his life is in California. That’s where he’s headed in the morning. His brother will be here around eleven to stay until Jonah gets back.”

  When that might be, nobody could say. Krista honestly didn’t know if she had a date to the masked ball or not.

  “Well, my darling, let me give you a piece of advice. Don’t do what I did. If he’s the one, then make whatever sacrifice you need to be with him.”

  Krista had been too shocked to speak at first. “Mom, you’re a feminist. A mover and shaker in Hollywood. Your name is on a line of perfume, makeup, and clothing. You’re at the top of your game. Everyone says so. Are you telling me you wished you’d stayed in New York with Dad, instead of becoming Sabrina Gates?”

  The look on her mother’s face at the time hadn’t made sense. Nor had her comment, “The satisfaction you derive from success is fleeting, Krista. Like fame, it’s a flash in the pan, so to speak. Love is what lasts.”

  They hadn’t taken the discussion any further because someone—Diego, most likely—started a snowball fight that stirred up the dogs and got Bindi barking. They’d finished off the evening watching the latest movie Mom had produced. An action-adventure buddy film with a surprisingly sweet romantic side.

  “So, we’ll see you at the vacation rental in the morning, right?” Dad had reminded her as they’d headed to the door. “Your mom and I have something important to tell you, so don’t be late.”

  Krista had been expecting everyone to stick around Marietta for a whole week—as promised. But plans changed. Diego’s girlfriend had a fashion shoot in Paris and she talked him into joining her. Big surprise there.

  Her sisters met a couple of cute skiers on the flight to Bozeman and decided to greet the New Year in Vail. Since Dad’s throat problem was still an issue, Mom had decided to take him home to LA to see a specialist she knew. That left J, who rarely shared his plans with anyone. All she knew was he would be on a train in the morning.

  Three hours later, shocked, numb, her gut a knot of vipers she wished like hell she’d had the foresight to get in her car and drive in whatever direction offered the least chance of a blizzard, instead of being the dutiful daughter who never questioned why the need for a final powwow.

  Her parents’ news had taken everyone by surprise. Even the best of actors couldn’t have faked the shock and fear and grief she saw on her siblings’ faces.

  “Mom, no way,” she’d cried, rushing to her mother’s side. “We need to get a second opinion.”

  “Or ten,” Diego had shouted.

  “You can’t be dying,” Branna said. “You look too good.”

  Krista still hadn’t come to grips with the idea that her mother’s quality of life was in peril and might—no, would—be in sharp decline very soon, but her mother and father had laid out her diagnosis and prognosis with businesslike candor. It had crossed her mind that they must have rehearsed.

  She couldn’t remember driving back to the Andrews’ house, but somehow she made the trip without running over anyone. She got all the way to the kitchen before her knees gave out and she sank to the floor in a puddle of abject despair.

  The dogs crowded around to see what was going on.

  Her hand trembled as she rested it on River Jack’s head. The dog leaned in, as if sensing her need for comfort.

  “Mom’s sick,” she whispered. “It’s b-bad.”

  She couldn’t bring herself to repeat the words.

  Bear and Bindi crowded closer. “This is so damn wrong.”

  The tears started again, along with raw, aching sobs that made poor Jack whimper and try to climb onto her lap. He knocked her off balance and she wound up landing hard on her elbow but she didn’t care.

  “What am I going to do? I offered to move home to help her, but Dad says that’s his job. He’ll let me know when they need help. But I have to do something. I can’t just carry on like nothing’s happened, right?”

  The same way she always did. Pretending. Maybe I’m an actor, after all.

  Pretend to be happy and eventually it won’t be pretending. Even if you’re in love and the man you love isn’t answering his phone.
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  Bindi’s sudden, piercing yodel nearly broke the sound barrier and triggered a heart attack. Nerves askew, cheeks wet, raccoon eyes—no doubt—she held her breath as the outer door to the mudroom opened, followed a second later by stomping feet. A man’s head popped around the doorway. “Anybody home?”

  The dogs abandoned her to greet their long lost sibling. Daniel, not Jonah. And while, the brothers shared some resemblance, Krista knew at a glance this handsome man was not the right handsome man.

  *

  Two hours and a whole box of tissues later, Krista felt as mushy as the overcooked pasta Daniel had attempted to cook for her. But other than providing a surprisingly tolerant and nonjudgmental shoulder to cry on, he hadn’t been much help.

  She tried Jonah’s number again.

  Daniel refilled her wine glass. “Krista, here’s what you need to know about my brother. He has a huge heart—and his brain’s not bad either—but when it comes to emotions, he’s easily freaked out and even easier to hurt.”

  “I hurt him? How?”

  “Mom says he thinks the only reason you started dating him was to try to score some kind of nanotechnology packaging for chocolates.” He shrugged. “Dumb, right? Like some big shipping company doesn’t have that covered.”

  “Sage’s chocolates?” She remembered joking with one of the Secret Santa ladies about picking Jonah’s brain after Christmas. And maybe the thought had crossed her mind when Amanda first suggested Krista take her place with the group, but she honestly hadn’t thought of it since. “Jonah thinks I was trying to use him to benefit Blue Sky Promotions?”

  “Seems so. But one has to wonder why? Who gives a damn about temperature-controlled boxes?”

  “Actually, the issue is bigger than you think, but it’s only important to someone like me who has been trying to convince a local chocolatier to take her company to the next level. Sage put me on hold until after the holiday rush, and I may have mentioned my need for specialized shipping containers, but I didn’t expect Jonah to drop off the planet to make one for me.” She sat forward, hand clenched around her wine glass. “He honestly thinks that’s the only reason I’ve been seeing him?”