Love on the High Seas

by Yasmin Sullivan

  She hadn’t forgotten about becoming a joke for his friends or about what he’d accused her of being in his office. But even if those weren’t fatal offenses, she still didn’t see how she could manage her life with him in it. Even once summer started, there would be summer classes and articles to get done, and she would be trying to squeeze in time for her novel.

  Beyond that, Philly had had another seizure two days earlier. He was already on a low dose of anticonvulsants, so he would have to have more follow-up, which meant more trips to the doctor.

  How could she have a relationship? She had to put an end to her involvement with Jeremy Bell.

  She didn’t want to fully admit it; perhaps that was why she’d let herself be carried along. When she was with him, everything she felt on the cruise came back: fluttering in her stomach, throbbing through her heart. And what she had started to feel with him wasn’t going away. It had gotten into her like an intravenous drip, and she couldn’t bleed it back out. It was the ache of tenderness, of affection, of...

  Angelina got up from the desk in her room and went to the phone. She dialed Safire’s number. She hated the idea of getting advice from her younger sister, but this was an area in which Safire had significantly more experience.

  After four rings, she hung up. Safire wasn’t home, like a regular twenty-three-year-old on a weekend. She’d come by earlier in the week—toting her latest beau—and had dinner with them. She should have talked to her sister then, when Safire had prodded. But at the time Safire’s teasing inquiry hadn’t inspired confidence. And just as well. She knew what she should do.

  As long as she had to be around him, her emotions would show, and she would be susceptible to the way he affected her. She shivered from his fingertips, and she couldn’t retain control when his arms were around her. She couldn’t stop what she wished or yearned for or felt. That didn’t mean that things could work out between them.

  Angelina no longer had Jeremy’s cell phone number, but she knew where he worked.

  That night, she changed and got into bed, ready for the next day but unprepared to dream of a being held by a bold African slave with warm brown eyes.

  The next day, she called from her office to see when Jeremy might have time to speak with her, and on Tuesday, when she didn’t have to be on campus, she headed across town. She could have done it on the phone, but he would take her more seriously in person, and she needed to get a result.

  Dr. Bell could see her in between his appointments that morning. In fact, he called her into his office almost as soon as she had seated herself in the waiting room.

  She held her breath through his brief embrace and then extricated herself.

  “I won’t bother you for very long,” she said, taking a seat in the chair facing his desk.

  “Is everything okay? Is Phillip okay?”

  “Yes, he’s fine. You know he had another seizure last week, but he’s on the medication. Dr. Carter says that they can adjust it until the seizures stop.”

  Angelina shook her head as if trying to wake herself up. How had she gotten on this subject?

  “Philly is not why I’m here. I needed to speak with you.”

  “And you don’t have my cell phone number?”

  “I don’t know what I did with it.”

  “Here, put it in your phone.”

  “No, that’s not why I came.”

  “Give me your phone,” he said, holding out his hand. “I’ll put my cell phone and my home phone in it for you.”

  She held her ground. “No. That’s not why I’m here.”

  “Look, Angelina, whatever happens between us, I hope that at least we’ll be friends. You should have my numbers.”

  “Write them down for me.”

  He did and then handed her the sheet of paper. Without looking at it, she folded it up and put it in her purse. When he sat looking at her, she knew she finally had his attention.

  “What brings you here?”

  “Jeremy, you’ve been wonderful to my family, and they all just adore you.”

  “But—?”

  “But I don’t think I should see you anymore.”

  “Because?”

  “I’ve had a chance to think about it. Whatever could have happened between us is marred by what happened before—by what your friends said and by what you said here.”

  He started to cut in, and she held up her hand.

  “Even without those things, I just don’t have the time to see anyone right now. And that’s not going to change during the summer, when I have summer classes and research.”

  “You won’t have to teach this summer or any other summer, unless you want to.”

  “Yes, I do. But that’s not the point. The point is that I can’t manage all of this. And I know that you’re great with Philly and Alex, but they’re young, and they’re getting attached, and that’s not a good thing if things can’t work out between us.”

  “As I said before, if we’re nothing else, then we’re friends, Angelina. I—”

  “It can’t work out, Jeremy. So what can this be for you other than a tryst, really?”

  “This is far more than a tryst, and you know it. And I understand that you don’t have a lot of time. I haven’t interfered with your work, have I?”

  “No, you haven’t. But there will always be work and home—at least for as long into the future as I can see. You can have someone who doesn’t come with all of this responsibility. You should. You like to go out. You have a life. You need a Safire, and I’m not her.”

  “You can’t tell me that you don’t have feelings for me.”

  She didn’t quite know what to say to that, but she was not going to go down on a technicality. She clasped her purse against her chest and refused to show what had come to life inside her. He couldn’t see that this hurt her, that losing her dream of him, of them, felt like she was ripping off her own arm, like she was losing him all over again. She sat back and crossed her legs, calm and staid.

  “I’m not prepared to have feelings for anyone right now.”

  “Okay,” he conceded. “I’ll give you time to figure out how you feel, but I’m not going anywhere. If you need some time to get used to the idea, say that. But you can’t say you don’t want me.”

  “I don’t want time, and I don’t want you. This isn’t a good idea, and you can’t force me into it. I don’t have time for games, especially ones I can’t win. And this can’t work.”

  “It will if you give it half a chance.”

  The intercom on his phone beeped, and he picked it up.

  “Okay...I’ll be right there.” He hung up. “I have to see someone now, but I won’t be long. Please wait for me.”

  She said nothing but waited until he left the office before getting to her feet. It hadn’t gone at all as she had hoped, and as long as she expected him to concede, she would be out of luck.

  She grabbed her purse and headed out of the hospital. If he insisted on coming around, there was little she could do about it. Eventually, he would see that she didn’t have time. Eventually, he would get tired.

  She got in her car and slammed the door, realizing then how frustrated she was. She hadn’t achieved her goal. She hadn’t even come near it. He had heard her request and tossed it aside, determined to pursue his own course. What would it take to get through to him?

  In the meantime, she had wasted the morning when she had work to get done for the next day. She headed back across town so annoyed—with herself, with Jeremy—that the car felt hot. If he thought he would simply nudge his way in and ignore her protest, he was in for a surprise.

  She focused on papers for the afternoon, glad to find that Alex had gone out looking for work.

  She stopped when Philly got home from school, followed soon by a disappoint
ed Alex. It was time to get dinner ready, so she let Philly go outside to play for a while as she pulled some chops out of the fridge and got them on the stove.

  She got back to grading early, leaving Philly downstairs with Alex and Aunt Rose. When she heard a knock at her bedroom door, she assumed it was one of the boys.

  “Come in, sweetie.”

  “Sweetie?” a deep voice said.

  She turned in her chair to find Jeremy looking at her.

  “I thought we should finish our conversation, Angelina. I’m sorry I had to interrupt us. They told me I would find you up here and that I could come.”

  He closed the door behind him and stood looking over her room.

  “I don’t think it will do any good. Perhaps you should wait for me downstairs. I’ll be down in a minute. We can talk in the kitchen.”

  “Worried about how this might look to your family? I don’t think they care, Angelina. I think they want you to be happy.”

  Instead of turning around, he came toward her and pulled out the other chair at her table. When he was finished looking around her room and reading the titles on her bookshelves, he turned to her, staring. His eyes were dark and brooding, and filled with something she couldn’t identify.

  “It’s okay if they get used to me being up here with you, Angelina.”

  “I have an example to set, Jeremy.”

  She stood to walk them both downstairs. Only he also stood, and before she knew what he was going to do, he had crossed the short distance toward her and taken her in his arms, backing her to the bed. He lifted her onto the bed and then followed the line of her body, placing himself above her. His mouth covered hers and muffled her protest.

  “Jeremy, we can’t.”

  “I know, my love,” he said and buried his tongue inside her mouth.

  Against her will, her mouth opened for his, and when his knee nudged her thighs open, they disobeyed her, as well. He tugged at her long skirt, bringing it upward as his hand cupped her rear, bringing her against the thick crease in his pants. Her hips tilted forward, ignoring her command to remain still, and her arms settled around his shoulders, flouting her edict to move away.

  With his manhood pressing deliciously against the center of her body, her throat let out a muffled whimper, and her hips ground upward. She breathed in his heady, masculine scent, and all of her thoughts were lost to the virile presence of his body covering hers.

  He moved himself up and down along her womanhood, reaching between them to massage her breast. She sucked in her breath and moaned quietly.

  Her sound drew a garbled groan from him, and he lifted himself slightly, running his hand down over her upraised skirt to the panties beneath. What he felt there made him inhale sharply and claim her lips again before placing himself back against her.

  He pulled himself up onto his elbows, running a hand along her cheek.

  “I’m sorry, Angelina. I’ve been wanting to do this for so long that I couldn’t resist. Come home with me tonight. Let me make love to you. You’re so wet, so ready. I want you so badly.”

  With more willpower than she knew she had, Angelina pushed him backward and squirmed from underneath him. Her skirt was hitched up to show her panties, and she tugged it down, trying to regain a semblance of dignity.

  “No, I told you this can’t work, and now you see why. I can’t saunter off in the middle of the evening. And I can’t have a strange man up in my bedroom.”

  “I’m not a strange man, and I would have you home by morning. I think Alex can help with Aunt Rose tonight. But—”

  He raised his hand to quell her protest and casually lifted himself from the bed.

  “But I said I wouldn’t rush you, so I won’t. Take some time to get used to the idea of us being together.”

  He went back to the table and sat down.

  “We’ll get a little extra help for your great-aunt so that you don’t have to worry about taking a night off here and there, and don’t put in to teach this summer. I know you’ll have articles to work on and Phillip to look after, but that’s it.”

  “Don’t give me directions, Jeremy. I’m not going to shirk my responsibilities—”

  “No one is saying that, but a little extra help so that we can have some time with each other is a reasonable request, not a direction, and I can afford it. And I can help more than you give me credit for. By the way, when do I get to make the lamb?”

  “You’re not listening again.”

  “I’m listening to everything—everything you say and everything you don’t say.”

  “Look—” she started. But he cut her off.

  “If I needed a Safire, I’d be out looking for one. What I want is you.”

  “No. It’s just leading us both on when it won’t work.”

  “Think about it, love,” he said. He kissed her before heading out the door.

  After he was gone, Angelina balled her fists up and pounded them against her thighs. If her body had listened to her, he might have taken her seriously, but she had acted like a wanton hussy, letting him lift her skirt and feel what was underneath.

  He thought he wanted to play homemaker, but he had no idea what was involved, and in the meantime Philly and Alex were getting more attached. She herself was getting used to having him underfoot all over again. And she did want him—it was like a toothache. She wanted to play with him in a tropical rainforest and feel his arms about her and get lost in his warm brown eyes. But that was all fantasy.

  She had to get a hold on her emotions and do what made sense.

  Chapter 18

  “Do these go in the dishwasher?” Michelle asked.

  “Everything goes in the dishwasher,” Jeremy said. “There’s nothing it can’t handle.”

  Alistair came into the kitchen. “Thanks for the magnificent eats. Can I help?”

  “Nope. Miss Daisy needs no assistance.”

  “I know you didn’t just call me Miss Daisy,” Michelle said.

  “Miss Daisy is the new dishwasher,” Alistair said, and he and Michelle laughed.

  “Laugh if you will,” Jeremy said, “but Daisy’s got it going on.”

  “You guys go ahead,” Michelle said. “I’ll find you when I’m done.”

  In Jeremy’s bedroom, Alistair lounged back on the sofa and kicked his knee over the arm. Jeremy took his carry-on out of the closet, opened it on the bed and started tossing items inside.

  “Why are you going home?”

  “I don’t know. I’ve been spending time with Angelina’s family—her brother and cousin and great-aunt. It makes me appreciate having parents who are still around. So I thought I’d go see them, see what trouble Eddy’s up to.”

  “Is she going?”

  “No, but I wish she was. My parents are going to love her.”

  “You sound certain they’re going to meet.”

  “No, just wishful thinking. Any news for your mom?”

  “No. Just ask her when she’s coming.”

  “Next month.”

  “Huh? How do you—? Oh, it’s her birthday. Oh, snap. I almost forgot.”

  “Just tell her I’ll see her next month.”

  “Who?” Michelle asked, plopping down on the bed.

  “My mother,” Alistair said.

  “Any message for your family?”

  “No, just say hello for me.”

  “You know,” Jeremy said, “next time we all go together. And I don’t mean for Thanksgiving or Christmas.”

  “Yeah,” said Michelle. “Let’s go for a week over the summer.”

  “And I’m bringing Reggie.”

  “And I’m bringing Angelina.”

  “And her brother and her cousin and her great-aunt,” Alistair said and laughed.
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  “Actually, yes. It’s about the only way I would get her to go, anyway, if she’s still talking to me at all.”

  “Do I hear trouble in paradise?”

  “Well, she keeps telling me to get lost, if that’s trouble.”

  Michelle and Alistair laughed, and Jeremy found himself laughing along with them. It was a rather absurd situation. If only he could get her to just give him a chance.

  “Oh, and she said that all it could be for me is a tryst.”

  “Ouch,” Michelle said. “Maybe she has your number.”

  “Trysts can be good,” Alistair said. “But—”

  “But that isn’t what I want with her,” Jeremy admitted.

  “Could it just be the thrill of the chase?” Michelle asked. “I mean, you’ve never had to work to get a woman before.”

  “No, it’s not that. I’m really serious about her.”

  “Is that why you don’t listen when she says to get lost?” Michelle asked.

  Jeremy sat down on the bed and looked at her. “It’s that, and it’s how she responds to me when we’re together. That keeps me hoping.”

  “Well, we’ll hope with you,” Alistair said.

  “Thanks.”

  The next afternoon, Alistair gave him a ride to the airport so that that he could get home to Houston, Texas. His younger brother, Edward, picked him up because his visit was a surprise for his folks.

  Edward was shorter than he was, with big dimples in his grin, which was usually twisted to the side in some bawdy humor. Edward was filled out like he was, athletic like he was, and a lady killer in an Oxford shirt and pleated slacks. He still had childhood hidden in his face, which didn’t match his lewd sense of humor and constant pursuit of the ladies, but it helped him with the latter.

  “Hey, Biggie,” Edward said.

  He threw his arms around his older brother and gave him a bear hug, and Jeremy felt as though he was home. He stayed at Edward’s overnight and surprised his mother in the morning.

  At his parents’ house, his mother nearly dropped the bowl of greens that she was carrying when he and Edward walked through the door.