Come Back to Me

by Chris Paynter

  “That was the last time you saw her?”

  “Yes,” Meryl whispered.

  “Oh, honey.”

  Rhonda moved closer and put her arm around Meryl’s shoulders. “I wish this was some Hollywood movie where she really would arrive at your door on a big white horse. And why does it always have to be white? Can’t we have a big black horse?”

  Meryl laughed.

  “There. At least I got a reaction out of you. What you’ve told me makes me despise your father that much more. And I didn’t like the man in the first place because of his manipulative ways.” Rhonda ducked her head to meet Meryl’s eyes. “Do you want to tell me the rest?”

  Meryl didn’t trust herself to speak, so she shook her head.

  “You sure?”

  “I can’t.” Meryl’s voice cracked.

  “It’s all right. I understand.”

  Meryl stood up and took both their glasses. “More wine?”

  “Better not. You remember how it is with me. One glass is just enough. Two make me stupid.”

  Meryl poured another glass for herself, filling it nearly to the top.

  Rhonda watched from the couch. “You okay?”

  “I’m fine.” Meryl took a long drink.

  Rhonda stood. “I need to get home. We’re having a meeting bright and early Monday morning, and I need to get a lot of work done between now and then. Seems Owen isn’t pleased with our latest mock-ups.”

  Meryl went to Rhonda and gave her a hug. She started to withdraw from the embrace, but Rhonda pulled her close again.

  “I love you,” Rhonda said.

  “Love you, too.”

  She walked Rhonda to the door.

  “Try to get some rest, Meryl. You look exhausted.”

  “I will.” She leaned against the doorframe and watched Rhonda stride down the hall to the elevators. “Be safe.”

  Rhonda waved in reply.

  Meryl closed and locked the door. When she sat back down on the couch, Malachi jumped from the chair and into her lap. Meryl stroked his head, but it must not have been to his taste. He flounced to the other end of the couch.

  She rested her head on the cushion. A suffocating loneliness enshrouded her. She wasn’t happy, and she wondered if she’d ever be again.

  Rhonda was right.

  Meryl hated when that happened.

  Chapter 13

  Angie took The Pride of Youngstown out late Sunday afternoon. She hoped to enjoy the solitude she’d heard most writers craved. The sun descended on the horizon, casting its late light across the water. She took the boat out a little farther so that the coastline was barely visible on the starboard side. She continued pointing her boat toward the setting sun as if she could enter the great ball of orange and allow the heat to swallow her.

  Noise filled her head. She raised her face to the light filtering through the glass in front of the ship’s wheel. She attempted to clear out everything in her mind except for her memories. She replayed the times she and Meryl had made love, and then in her imagination, fit fleeting moments of ecstasy into the lives of her new novel’s characters.

  Angie cut the engines and stepped down into the cabin to the refrigerator for a Coke. She climbed back to the deck and sank into the captain’s chair. She ran her fingers across the ship’s wheel, still pleased she’d replaced the original metal one with a wooden wheel to add to the allure of the boat. As she caressed the wheel, she formulated a new chapter in her mind. She was about to jot down her ideas in a notebook when her cell phone vibrated at her side.

  “I swear to God, if that’s Sally, I’m tossing the damn thing into the water.” She unclipped it and smiled when she read the number. “Hey, Mrs. Torelli. Did you have a wonderful vacation in Italy?”

  “We did,” her sister said. “It would’ve been better if we could’ve left the kids at home. The only thing we heard from them was ‘we’re sooo bored’ the entire time there.”

  “But you love them and couldn’t live without them.”

  Silence.

  “Jan?”

  “I guess you’re right,” Jan said with a sigh. Then she giggled. “You know me too well, don’t you?”

  “I think I know you better than Rick does sometimes, even though that man worships the ground you walk on.”

  “You may have a point.”

  “But you had a good trip?”

  “Yes, except we wish you could’ve made it, too.”

  “We’ve been over this. I don’t think our family there would accept me any more than the ones at home do.”

  “You don’t know—”

  “I’m thirty-two now. I don’t want to go through that crap again. Ever.”

  “Dad still asks about you.”

  “He’s only called me twice in all these years. He’s made it clear he won’t go against Mom.”

  “He loves you, Angie.”

  “Can we talk about something else?” Angie crushed the empty Coke can in her hands.

  “I’ll drop it. Sorry.”

  “It’s okay. You always mean well.”

  “When can I come down there for a visit? I miss you.”

  “It’s been a little hectic meeting this latest deadline.”

  “Right. Sometimes I forget what you do for a living. Hang on a sec.” Jan sounded muffled, but Angie still made out the words. “Anthony Michael Torelli, is that where your coat goes?” There was some grumbling in the background. “I didn’t think so.”

  Angie chuckled. “You do realize who you sounded like just then.”

  “I’m ignoring that comment. Back to visiting you. When’s a good time? I haven’t seen you in months.”

  “I’m not sure.”

  “Okay then. Don’t be surprised if I show up unannounced.”

  Before Angie could respond, Jan’s voice rose.

  “Anthony, I’m on the phone. Damn it,” Jan cursed. “I have to go, sis. Sorry.”

  Angie set her cell phone aside. She turned the engines over and pointed the boat toward Key West. Thoughts of her family prevented any more forays into writing. She suddenly felt very tired.

  * * *

  “Is there anyone else I need to call this week to reschedule?”

  Meryl glanced up at Wade sitting across from her desk. “Grisham?”

  “Called his agent Friday afternoon.”

  Meryl paged through her appointment book. “How about Patty Cornwell?”

  “I tried Monday. I had to leave a message.”

  “It’s Thursday. Please try again today. I want you to talk to someone live to avoid any mix-ups.”

  Wade made a notation on his legal pad.

  “Did you get in touch with purchasing? I’m assuming everything’s set?”

  “Yes. You’re on a flight leaving LaGuardia at ten-fifty Saturday morning. Straight flight into Miami. You’ll arrive there a little after two. You have about a three-hour layover.” Wade looked up from his legal pad. “I apologize for that. Purchasing said it was the best they could do.”

  “Don’t worry about it.”

  “Your next flight leaves at five-ten, a commuter into Key West Airport. You should be there in a little under an hour.”

  “What about hotel—”

  “Done. You’re staying at the Southernmost Point Resort. You’re booked for a week, but they’re leaving the room open for an additional week if you need to stay longer.”

  “What are we paying you again, Wade?”

  His face reddened. “I could always use more.”

  “I’ll see to it when I return.”

  “Anything else I need to handle?”

  “I was about to mention a rental car, but I think I’ll walk and take cabs while I’m there.”

  Her phone rang. She glanced down at the caller ID and frowned.

  “I need to take this.”

  “Right.” He closed the door on the way out.

  She picked up the receiver. “Yes, Mother?”

  Soft sobs echoed over the li
ne.

  “Mother?” Meryl straightened in her chair. She gripped her pen a little tighter.

  “They’re giving him three weeks,” her mother said, choking on each word.

  Meryl struggled for words. “I’m sorry. Sorry for you.”

  “Please don’t make me beg you to come home, Meryl.”

  Meryl snapped the pen in half. Ink spread across her appointment book. “Shit.” She searched her office, trying to find something to blot up the ink.

  “Did you hear me?”

  “Yes, I heard you.” Meryl pulled open a drawer and grabbed a wad of tissues. She pressed them onto the stain. It didn’t do any good. In the process, she dipped the cuff of her blouse into the ink. She bit her lower lip to keep from screaming out in frustration.

  “I didn’t raise you to be like this.”

  Meryl let her next words escape her lips without thinking. “Maybe you didn’t, but Father and Grandmother sure did a hell of a number on me.”

  “When will you let that go?”

  “Never,” Meryl said.

  “Meryl…”

  “I’m leaving on an assignment Saturday. I’ll call you when I get back to New York.”

  “It may be too late.”

  “I’ll call you when I get back.” Meryl hung up the phone. She rubbed at her sleeve with the tissue, only spreading the stain. She threw the tissues in the trash. “Damn it!” She held her head in her hands and tried to choke back the tears.

  A quiet knock forced her to clear her throat and wipe her face. “Yes?”

  Wade opened the door a crack. “I reached Ms. Cornwell’s agent and spoke to her. We’re rescheduled for the first of next month.”

  “Good. Thank you.”

  “Is everything okay?”

  “Yes. I’m fine.” Meryl smiled weakly. “Thank you for all of your work on this trip.”

  “You’re welcome. Anything else?”

  Meryl noticed the time. “Wade, I’m sorry. It’s six-thirty. Please go home.”

  “You’re sure you don’t need me?”

  “There’s nothing more for you to do. Please go and enjoy what’s left of your evening.”

  He hesitated and then shut the door.

  Meryl stepped over to the blinds and shut them. She pulled out her gym bag from the closet, changed into her sweats, and dropped her blouse and suit into the bag. She’d seen her therapist the night before and sure as hell didn’t want to call him again. At least she wouldn’t hurt anyone by taking out her frustration on some free weights.

  * * *

  “I’m so happy for you, Angie. And I’m pleased you stood up to Sally,” Ev said while she flagged down refills on their Cokes. It was lunchtime on Friday, and they were having burgers at Sloppy Joe’s. “What was your inspiration to return to lesbian fiction?”

  “How do you do that?”

  “Do what?”

  “Give me that look, knowing I could never lie to you.”

  “It’s not so bad, is it?” Ev poured ketchup on her fries. “My mother was full-blooded Cherokee. I couldn’t keep a thing from her, either. She had this way of seeing right through me.”

  “Really?” Angie asked sarcastically.

  “I guess I have the gift, too.”

  “If you want to call it that.”

  “You’re avoiding the question. I know you don’t want me to keep staring at you, but if that’s what—”

  Angie held up her hand. “No! God no.” She put her burger down and wiped her hands on her napkin.

  “Uh-oh. This seems serious.” Ev put down her burger as well.

  “It’s Meryl McClain.”

  “Okay…”

  “Which I’m sure the Native-American seer in you already sensed.”

  “I didn’t need my mother’s gift to figure that one out. You’ve been out of sorts since her review hit the paper. And even more out of sorts these past few weeks after her article about Zach England’s identity.”

  “You could say that.” Angie stared down at her food.

  “I don’t think that burger will help you figure things out.”

  “The review and the article brought up so many things for me. And I can’t keep the thoughts inside. I have to write. It’s a compulsion.”

  “Maybe this will be cathartic for you.”

  “I’m scared about going through the pain, too.”

  “But that’s how we grow.”

  Did Angie want to dredge up the most painful memory of her past? She glanced across the table at Eve, took a deep breath, and plunged ahead.

  “The second semester of our senior year, I found out that Meryl was engaged. A friend who was also a journalism major mentioned it to Jacqueline within my earshot. This friend had no clue what kind of relationship Meryl and I’d shared. I found out when and where the wedding would be. I swore I wouldn’t go, but the sick part of me wanted to know. I think I needed to feel more pain.” Angie blinked away unexpected tears.

  Ev gave her a reassuring look.

  “I drove up there. I wasn’t sure why. I still don’t know why, other than maybe to put it all to rest. When I got there, I realized what a huge mistake I’d made. I got out of my car when the church bells rang. Meryl stepped through the door with her arm on his. In my mind’s eye, I can see her on those church steps in Mount Lebanon like it was yesterday. And then she saw me and did something I’ll never forget. She touched her hand to her heart”—Angie mimicked the action—“and raised it to me. ”

  “Oh.” Ev put her fingers over her mouth.

  “Her father pointed in my direction, and two security guards rushed over and shoved me into my car. They told me if I ever bothered Mrs. Alberson again, I’d be arrested. I almost threw up, hearing her called that.”

  “I’m so sorry.” Ev pulled out a tissue from her purse and handed it to Angie. Then she got one for herself.

  Angie wiped at her eyes and balled up the tissue in her hands. “Want to hear something funny?”

  “That would be wonderful right about now, although by the way you said that, I’m not sure I’ll think it is.”

  “Since that day, I haven’t watched the movie, The Graduate. Want to know why?”

  “I think I might know, but go ahead and tell me.”

  “Every time Dustin Hoffman pounds on the glass above the chapel where Katherine Ross is getting married, screaming out her name, I remember that day eleven years ago. And I feel like such a fucking coward. I should’ve done the same thing. I should’ve marched into that church and rescued Meryl. But I didn’t. I let her go.”

  “She made her own choice as to what life to live. You have to remember that.”

  Angie whispered, “I still should’ve done it.”

  Ev took Angie’s hand and held it until Angie looked up at her. “It’ll be okay. Writing about it should help, don’t you think?”

  “We’ll see.”

  Ev checked her watch. “I’m sorry I can’t stay longer, but it’s three-thirty and I’d better leave to pick up the boys at school.” Ev turned over her bill and put her money on the table. She slid out of the booth. “Try to have some fun this weekend. Why don’t you go to the CC tomorrow night with Sage?”

  “Maybe.” Angie pulled out some money to pay her bill.

  “Let’s get together next week for coffee. How does Tuesday morning sound? About ten?”

  “I’ll walk over to your place, and we’ll go to Joe Joe’s and make fun of everyone paying five dollars for a cup of coffee.”

  “And then laugh at ourselves because we’re two of those fools?”

  “Yup.”

  “I’ll call you Monday.”

  They left the restaurant together. Ev gave Angie a hug, got into her minivan, and pulled away. Angie walked home, keeping her head down, not wanting to have any connection to the tourists strolling along Duval.

  Chapter 14

  Meryl marveled at the blue-green water below as the plane drifted into its descent. Maybe this would be just what she ne
eded: a week or so in what appeared to be a tropical paradise. Most of the time, she’d search for the elusive author. But she planned to get in some relaxation, too. Come to think of it, how do you search for someone who wants to remain unseen? Zack England, whoever he or she was, had obviously done a damn good job of remaining faceless over the years.

  She picked up her laptop case and tugged down her carry-on from the overhead compartment. After exiting the airport, she hailed a taxi and gave the driver the name of the hotel. Trying to ignore the musty smell of the backseat, she took in her surroundings while he drove about ten miles over the speed limit.

  Meryl checked into the hotel. Like a lot of places in Key West, it was lesbian-friendly. Before she went up to her room, she asked the desk clerk if there were any nice lesbian nightclubs in the area.

  “Try the Cozy Conch about seven blocks down the street. It’s the best one in town. The owner whipped it into something special once she bought out the place a few years ago.” The woman’s gaze traveled from Meryl’s face, down her body, and back up again. “I get off work at nine. Want me to walk you down there?”

  “I think if you point me in the direction, I should find it just fine.” Meryl picked up her luggage.

  “Need any help with that?” The clerk gave her a crooked grin.

  “No, I’ve got it. Thanks.”

  In her room, she grabbed a hot shower and a nice, cold drink. She’d venture out later to take in some of the notorious Key West night life. Meryl hoped for a relaxing time at the Cozy Conch. She’d start snooping around for Zach England tomorrow.

  She took a sip of her drink and said a silent prayer. Please, God, don’t let anyone else hit on me while I’m here.

  * * *

  “Hey, sweetie.” Sage kissed Angie on the cheek before taking a seat next to her at the Cozy Conch bar.

  “Glad you could make it. I was beginning to wonder.”

  Sage raised his hand at Christi.

  “Mimosa?” Christi asked.

  He placed his hand on his chest in feigned indignation. “Am I that predictable?”

  Angie and Christi answered “yes” at the same time.

  “I should be offended, but since I love you both so much, I’ll ignore it.”