by Kathryn Moon
I swallowed hard and folded my arms over my chest to resist the sudden inclination to go running back into the den and start petting the poor girl and purring in her ear. I needed to be the opposite of a pushy alpha.
“I’ll try and be more…natural around her,” I said, and Leo beamed at me.
“She wants to be comfortable around you all. It’s happening.”
I nodded. “It just takes time. I know.”
Leo slid spoons into the prepared bowls and then wrapped his arms around my waist, our noses brushing. “Love you.”
I sighed, and my hands cupped his jaw, our mouths grazing softly together. I wanted more, but with Lola in the next room, it was not the time to start something with my beta that I wouldn’t get to finish.
“I love you too,” I rasped.
Leo leaned back, lips parted like he was about to speak, but instead he smiled and nodded, slipping away and taking dessert to Lola in the den. Cyrus walked into the kitchen as Leo left, his eyes slanted in a private smile as he moved to me.
“Struggling?” Cyrus asked.
“I don’t know why. It’s not like they haven’t had their share of relationships I wasn’t a part of, didn’t need to be a part of.”
Cyrus nodded. “Yeah, but Lola’s not taking them for a ride. This one’s more serious. I do okay with it at the magazine. She’s different there. I don’t see the cracks while we’re working.” Cyrus looked me over with a slower stare. “You need to get out for the night? We could go…for drinks? Find some music maybe?”
I shook my head and combed my hair out of my eyes. “No, I…I prefer to be here. Is that perverse?”
“It’s a little masochistic,” Cyrus said fondly. He stepped in close and I accepted his full kiss. “But I understand.”
I grabbed my own loaded bowl of sugar and cream and chocolate, and returned to the den with Cyrus close at hand, my eyes immediately turning to the bundled young woman in the arms of my beta.
“Can I help you?”
My head whipped around to find Lola hovering in the doorway of the formal dining room. Her hair was damp from a shower, but there was no mistaking the scents. Rake and Leo had kept Lola to themselves all afternoon. She was dressed in something a little sleeker than the usual woman’s standard of a Little Black Dress, a more contemporary and boxy silhouette, but the fabric leaned into her curves, giving away hints of her shape.
“I’m…I’m trying not to overdo it,” I said, looking back to the table I was dressing. “But do you think candles would be nice?”
The dinner party, if it could be called that, was my idea. It was just a few extra seats shy of being a family dinner, but the nature of the event had convinced Carolyn to come, as well as Lola’s cousin, David. Lola had been slipping in and out of the house for the past two weeks—basically as often as Rake and Leo could convince her to come—and while she joined the pack for meals, she still seemed slightly ill at ease. I was hoping tonight might change the atmosphere just enough for her to feel less like she was intruding on the pack, and more like she could see herself as a part of the company.
The dining room was long and somewhat narrow, thin mirrored panels along the walls to give the space more depth and warm sconce lighting. We’d have more than enough room at the table with just the nine of us, and I’d taken advantage of the extra space with careful floral arrangements.
“I like candlelight,” Lola said with a nod. She padded into the room barefoot and stood across the table from me. “These are beautiful,” she added, reaching out to touch the flowers I’d pulled from the gardens, spindling ferns mixed with low dark buds and blooms, and thin long-stemmed herbs hanging out of vases. “You’ve taken so much time on this dinner.”
“I have more fun planning than I do at the events, to be honest,” I said, and then rushed to correct myself. “Not that tonight will be stressful, of course. David’s an old friend.”
Lola smiled at that and shrugged. “I’m already a little nervous.”
“Because it’s the whole pack?” I asked, frowning. She’d seemed more at ease in the past week, less watchful of her surroundings in the house and less inclined to stiffen when one of us entered the room.
“No. Because I don’t think I’ve ever been to a dinner party before. Not one that wasn’t really a potluck,” she said, grinning.
I glanced down at the plates and tableware I’d already laid out. Maybe I needed to simplify a little. We didn’t need the full set of china.
“If you go to the mirror three to the left of you and press in, you should find the candles inside,” I said.
Lola turned to the wall and moved to where I pointed, pressing against the surface. “Oh, that’s cool!”
“If you choose a mix of lanterns and candlesticks, I’ll make us both a drink to help burn off our nerves. How does that sound?”
Lola hesitated, her face barely in profile, and a dark cloud settled on my shoulders. She didn’t want an alpha making her a drink. That monster Wes was hunting had turned her inside out, had shown her the worst of my designation. And I didn’t know how to prove to her that I wasn’t a threat.
“A drink sounds nice,” Lola said, reaching into the hidden cabinet. “Better not make it too strong though. I don’t drink much.”
The cloud evaporated. “Two very mild drinks coming up,” I said, hurrying out of the room to head for the bar.
Trust would come with time and good experiences. That was what tonight was for.
Lola was tucked between David and Leo in the corner of the long couch—red lips curled in an almost permanent smile, cheeks rosy from dinner, and a long series of drinks. There was a glass in her hand against her lap, ice melted and the contents forgotten.
“You’re watching her,” Rake whispered in my ear.
My eyes flicked to him, his chin landing on my shoulder and Cyrus close on his other side.
“I know,” I whispered back, face flushing.
“Cute,” Rake said, his smile smug. I shook my head minutely.
Rake probably wouldn’t announce my interest in Lola. He wouldn’t want to jeopardize her comfort with our pack. But he wouldn’t let me forget he knew either.
“…So I let them carry on trying to fit that juniors dress on their horrid mannequins…” David rattled on in his story and Lola’s giggle sounded from the corner, her head leaning against Leo’s shoulder.
David’s attendance at the dinner had been a roaring success. Rake and Leo didn’t seem surprised by Lola’s almost effervescent mood, but it was clear on Matthieu and Wes’ faces that they were as awed to see the generally subdued young woman in stitches and smiles. Lola took another sip of her drink, one of many I’d made for her throughout the night by her own request.
She wiggled forward between the two men, Leo’s hand wrapped around her side, and set the drink down with a thunk before dropping back into Leo’s chest, allowing him to pull her closer. Her gaze was drowsy and warm, body limp and relaxed, and I realized with a quick glance around the room that it wasn’t just me staring. My entire pack’s focus was drifting to her.
With a quick glance at Carolyn, I wondered if there was a subtle way to remind Matthieu to pay attention to his girlfriend.
“Would anyone like another drink?” I asked, rising up from the end of the couch.
Carolyn raised her wine glass, lips pressed in a thin line, as a few voices echoed their thanks.
“I should actually be going,” David said.
“Oh, David,” Lola cried, smile falling.
David rose and smoothed down his suit, reaching out his hand to his cousin. “I know, but it’s late. Downtown streets will be a mess with the partiers if I stay any longer.”
“I’ll walk you out,” Lola said, swaying as she rose up from the couch.
She’d worn heels for the dinner but kicked them off almost immediately when we moved to the couches, and now she bounced along behind David as he made his goodbyes and they headed for the doors, a little drunk but not
terribly so. I wasn’t sure if it was all women in formal wear and bare feet that I found arousing, or just Lola.
I carried a tray of glasses with me to the bar, and realized from where I stood I could see out of the living room and to the front door clearly. Lola and David were standing close at the door, Lola’s smile easy as David said his goodbyes. I poured wine, refreshed Matthieu’s bourbon and ice, and when I looked up again the cousins were still speaking. Except this time Lola’s head was dropped, her smile gone. David had her hands in his, his head cocked to try and catch her eye.
Liquid splashed against my hand and I shook myself, wiping tonic water away with a rag and spilling some of the drink back into the sink. Rake would forgive me.
I took the drinks back to Carolyn and my pack, Carolyn relishing the undivided attention of the moment by telling some story regarding her and Matthieu at an event. I slipped away before Rake could pull me back down the couch and headed for the front door where Lola was watching David meet a cab on the road. Her lips were turned down as she stared out the window, but when she caught my reflection in the glass a new smile bloomed.
“Are you all right?” I asked, soft enough the room of people nearby wouldn’t hear us.
She nodded and turned away from the door. “David just got me in the feels is all,” Lola said with a soft shrug.
Her lips were a vivid red, eyes shadowy, but her hair was down and mussed with waves I wanted to run my fingers through. Instead, my hand was caught by hers, a gentle squeeze of her fingers around my palm.
“Thank you for inviting him, by the way,” she said.
“Of course,” I said, giving in to the urge to pull her closer by her hand, leading her back to the others. I was holding her loosely, she could pull away if she needed to, but Lola followed along at my side, warm shoulder brushing against my arm.
“I suppose I should’ve expected as much, dating one of the city’s most desirable alphas,” Carolyn continued, rolling her eyes at Matthieu.
“Just the city’s?” Matthieu joked, his shoulders tense, eyes tracking Lola as her hand slipped free from mine and she practically skipped back to Leo’s side.
“You have a constant flock of sycophants, Matt,” Carolyn said. “I didn’t realize I’d have to defend our relationship so much.”
I glanced to Rake just as he rolled his own eyes.
“The one I don’t understand is Wes,” Lola said, before Rake could say something petty to Carolyn.
Wes, who’d been left to his own quiet devices in an armchair facing the couch, raised his eyebrows and glanced at us in question.
“Wes?” Carolyn echoed with a puzzled frown.
Lola stretched her long legs out on the couch as she leaned back into Leo’s chest, nodding and grinning wickedly. “Where are his sycophants? With the way he smells, I would’ve thought he’d have a non-stop pussy parade following him around.”
Matthieu choked on his scotch, and Cyrus belly laughed at the announcement. I found myself laughing too as Wes shifted nervously in his armchair while Carolyn gawked at him.
“Bravo!” Rake cried, leaning forward and clapping his hands together. “I concur. And on that note, how does he smell to you?”
Lola sat up, adorably puzzled. “Why? Does he smell different to you? Like…sex on the beach, but not the drink.”
Leo’s eyebrows shot up, and his grin was giddy as he glanced down at Lola. She was expressing interest in one of us. Or maybe not interest, but appreciation. An alpha. Wes. Our too often overlooked protector.
“Amazing,” Rake said with delighted awe. “He smells sweet and fresh to me, but it doesn’t make my mouth water.”
“Doesn’t make my mouth water either,” Lola said in a soft mutter with a slight giggle as Leo barked a laugh and dragged her up onto his lap, burying his smile against her throat.
I wanted to dive in next to them, to soak up their sweet faint scents. I joined Rake, let him anchor me with a hand on my thigh, and Cyrus stretched an arm out over both our shoulders.
“Oh now I understand it,” Carolyn said with a twist of her lips as she stared at Lola. “I couldn’t picture you with Rake at all, you seemed so timid. But now it makes sense! Anyway, every time I see you, I get that song stuck in my head. The old silly one, umm…” Carolyn hummed and waved her hand with thought while Matthieu frowned at her. “You’ll know it. Um, ‘Her name was Lola, she was a Show—’”
Wes sat forward, a sudden growl echoing in the room, startling Carolyn into silence. I glanced at Lola, and dread landed heavily in my lap. She was sitting up, stiff and pale, scooting away from Leo quickly as he reached for her, her back heaving with breaths.
“Lola, it’s all—”
And then she was up off the couch, legs scrambling clumsily as my entire pack stood as if we might catch her. She ran for the bar, straight to the sink, and heaved. Leo raced after her, framing her back and stroking her hair away from her face.
Carolyn sat gaping at us all as the warm, happy mood of the party suddenly died.
Not a very good idea after all, I thought.
Twenty-One
Lola
I kept my face buried in the pillow long after waking. I had a slight pinching headache from drinking more than usual the night before. Mostly though, I had a serious case of ‘never going to look anyone in the eye again’ for how the dinner party the night before had ended.
A warm hand stroked up my back beneath my t-shirt, the bed sinking under added weight.
“So are we hiding in here all day?” Rake asked, curling up against my back.
I was in Leo’s room, sprawled out on his mattress. I’d felt Leo get up out of the bed earlier in the morning, but I’d been pretty determined to be ignored. Not that I could reasonably expect Leo to let me just waste away in his bed for days on end.
I rolled over and winced at the sun. Rake pulled a pillow from the pile behind my head to lay over my eyes.
“I should go back to my apartment,” I said.
“Hey. No. I’m not here to drag you out of bed, okay? I just wanted to see what was on the agenda for the day. You want something for your stomach, or coffee for your head?”
I swallowed hard. “I want everyone to stop feeling like they have to see if I’m okay all the time.”
Rake was quiet for a moment. “Really? Because this seems like a pity party. And those usually like a bit of extra coddling.”
Fuck. I threw the pillow off my head and sat up, trying to ignore the pound in my head and the wobbling churn of my stomach. I glared down at a smirking Rake, and a moment later my lips twitched in answer. Sneaky omega had called me out. And he was right too.
“Okay, fair,” I said with a slight nod.
“So ginger ale or coffee?”
“Both. I’m gonna go brush my teeth eight times in a row.”
“Want me to bring it up to you?”
“No, I’ll come down. I want to apologize to everyone,” I said, moving slow and careful to the edge of the bed.
“Lola, that didn’t call for an apology!”
I waved my hand back at Rake as I jogged for the shower. I loved Leo’s shower, a deep blue tiled corner of his bathroom with a waterfall shower head and more thick glass tiling for the wall to let light in. I grabbed the spare toothbrush I’d been using while I spent the night and stripped quickly, turning the water on just shy of scalding before stepping under the spray. I’d gotten more used to having Rake’s scent on me, but I went ahead and used the scent cancelling products Leo had in the shower for me. Rake didn’t seem offended when I did, and they helped clear my head when I was feeling shaky.
I wrapped a towel around myself and stepped out of the shower to find Leo sitting on his sink counter waiting for me, a can of soda in one hand and a mug of coffee in the other.
I opened my mouth, and he shook his head. “Don’t do it, gorgeous.”
“You don’t even know what I was going to say!”
“Yes I do,” Leo said, arching an eyebro
w.
I swallowed hard and crossed to him, stepping in between his open legs and letting him pull me to his chest, my chin resting on his shoulder. “But Carolyn… I should explain.”
“Matt took Carolyn back to her place last night, and no, you really don’t need to do that. Carolyn was trying to antagonize Rake or Matthieu, or…I dunno. She didn’t realize what she was stepping into, and I’m sure if she were here she’d want to apologize to you too. So just let it go.”
“All right.”
“All right. Now, everybody wants to see that you’re okay for themselves, and Wes went and got groceries first thing this morning, including those seasoned potatoes you’re weird about—”
“Potatoes are a vital corner of the food pyramid,” I said, leaning back to defend my spuds.
Leo grinned and shook his head. “They don’t have their own corner, Lola.”
I reached up between us and made a triangle with my forefingers and thumbs. “The three main food groups are noodles, pizza, and potatoes. The chunk in the middle is your baked goods.”
Leo leaned back with his loud laugh. “I’d be really worried about you if I hadn’t seen you eating asparagus like it was going out of style last night.”
“I’m an equal opportunity eater. And you’re a really good cook. Now let me finish getting dressed. I need to chug this ginger ale and belch in private.”
“That’s my girl,” Leo murmured, pecking my lips and then sliding away and out of the room.
I sighed and stretched as the door shut behind him. Keep it together, I thought, staring at my own reflection. For Leo, Rake, and the pack, if not myself. I could crack when I was alone like this, but I was sick of making Leo patch me up when I was wobbling.
When I made it downstairs, dressed in a t-shirt dress and my hair a wet mess on the top of my head, I found that Caleb had brought up the flower arrangements from dinner. Wes and Leo were at the stove, and I moaned at the perfect morning smells of grease and meat and good rye bread.
