Shattered Heart

by Carol May

  “Doing what?” I ask.

  “Are you really that stupid that you can’t keep up with the conversation? My goodness, his standards are falling. You can call him but I think you will want to hear what I have to say before you do.”

  With a look of confusion, all I can do is sit and try to piece things together, why her face seems familiar. How she knows H. Am I in danger? Think, Charli, think. The bad feeling is easing away. Normally, I would be glad about that but the bad is being replaced with a feeling of fear.

  She can read me. I had no idea I am so transparent. “Don’t be afraid. I really didn’t mean to scare you. Here is the way it is going to happen. We ARE going to have our little talk. Then, what you do with the information you learn is of little consequence to me. I do hope for your own sake that you have enough sense to run away when we are finished.”

  Penny looks at me, “I thought it was time we met. So, I came to Miami. I don’t know how to say this any other way than to just come out and tell you, Houston does not love you. He might have thought he loved you for just a little while but he doesn’t.”

  Standing up, I can’t decide if I want to attack her or escape this horrible place. Reaching a decision quickly, I realize she isn’t worth any type of physical contact. (If I ever touch her, my Midwest girl that learned to defend herself against her two brothers might take over. She is locked and loaded that’s for sure.) I walk toward the door. I don’t have to listen to this crazy woman. Stopping, I draw my shoulders up to give myself all the stature possible, turn and give her a scathing look. (Hello, city girl).

  With that I address her in a tone that I hope matches my facial expression. “Listen! I have no idea why, you think, you control who Houston loves or doesn’t love but let me assure you, you don’t know anything about me or my relationship with him. You are wrong. He does love me.” (Ha! Take that. I love my city girl!)

  Looking me up and down. Her gaze rests on my chest. With a shrieking laughter, she retorts, “I see you have a copy of my necklace.” Reaching up, to caress the piece of jewelry that means so much to me, I stand trying to draw strength from the love Nigel and Penelope shared.

  Let me guess, he gave it to you while you were sitting somewhere romantic between his legs leaned back against his chest. I also bet that he had just finished a romantic story about Nigel and Penelope.”

  Stunned, I move my head in acknowledgement. I manage to utter, “Yes.” What she just said makes the small pit in my stomach suddenly becomes a crater.

  “No!” Did I just yell the word no out or was it in my head? Standing there, my mind is working in overdrive. No, no, no. Pull yourself together. There is an explanation. Don’t do this. I feel like I am going to be sick.

  With a snarl, and a wicked grin that would please the devil himself, she asks, “You’ve figured it out, haven’t you? or at least a small piece of the story.”

  It’s not a quirk of fate, is it?” I ask turning away from her as the bile rises in my throat. It is taking every ounce of my energy to keep my hands from flying to my mouth. I will NOT run away. Both my Midwest/city girls agree. We don’t run from anything. Somewhere way down inside me, they have melted into one. She has her hands on her hips and is looking at me with her best what the hell look. We can do this. Think about our feelings for him. Big deal this bitch knows things. We know how he makes us feel. Apparently we both have secrets. We haven’t shared ours, either. Drawing on my inner strength, I face her with a look that I hope scares her. My icy, cold eyes (at least I hope they are) are meeting hers. Sneering at me she responds quickly, “OOOO, quick to deduce, good skill. You are going to need it. Especially, if you think you are going to travel in these circles. Now, why don’t you come back over here, sit down and we can finish our conversation.”

  Standing in the middle of his office, I’m deliberating my next action. The thing I want to happen is to wake up from this sickening nightmare. That’s it this is one of my horrible nightmares. I’ll wake up any minute. Contemplating my next action, for a minute or so, I walk back to the navy sofa and sit down.

  “Excellent, you need to hear what I have to say. He isn’t the man you think he is. Let me guess, the Houston you know is kind, caring,” raising her eyebrows “a considerate lover, one that makes you wonder where he has been all your life. He puts your needs first doesn’t he? You thank the powers that be that he came into your life.”

  I will not let her see what she is doing to me. I manage to stammer an agreement. I really don’t know what I am saying. My new mid-city girl attitude needs to lay low. Obviously, I need to hear what she has to say no matter how it is breaking me inside. If I’ve learned one thing in life, in order for me to rise from the ashes of whatever this is that is happening, I must take on the qualities of a phoenix, burn completely to rise as a new woman.

  “Now let me tell you about the Houston I know. He will do anything to get ahead. His company is his only true love. She is a jealous mistress, believe me. Because of this, he has become a master of deception. The Houston Donovan I know and have known for twenty years is consuming. He makes me forget who I am. I learned if I want to be with him, loosing my identity is the price I must pay. He is almost a punishing lover. Taking care of my needs wasn’t a question. He always did that but HD’s, I’m not referring to Houston Donovan’s but the needs of Highland Diversified, eventually won out. It’s almost as if I am an afterthought. By the expression, I see you are trying to hide, you understand what I am talking about. Have you realized that his’ company’s initials are the same as his name? Did he tell you that we called him by his first name until he entered college? Sitting listening to her, it’s as if I’m paralyzed. My body won’t or can’t, I’m not sure which, follow the directions my head is giving. Barely, shaking my head, I look at her with a totally shocked face. Finally, managing to say, “I don’t want to hear anymore.”

  “You might not want to hear more but we both know you are going to listen, aren’t you? We both know what that burning desire for him is like. Now, you understand that I really do know him.” The only motion it seems my body is capable of is nodding in agreement that yes, I would continue to listen. “I’ve known him a long time. My brother and Houston were good friends. It started when they were in second grade. Houston’s parents divorced when he was really young, two I think, or maybe he was three. Oh well, doesn’t matter. Anyway, Hugh was at the house a lot. His mother was a mess. She would leave him with a nanny/babysitter and be gone for days. So he came to our house. Even when his Mother began moving the men in, he came to us. It was almost as if Houston was my brother. Just like the old saying, my brother but by another mother. The two of them did everything together. They got into lots of trouble but they got away with so much more. I was always the little sister hanging around. They didn’t really pay much attention to me. Believe me, I paid attention to them! Ben, the big brother that I worshiped, and his friend, oh yes, I knew all of their secrets. There were many.” With a smile, I call almost sinister, she adds “I still know a great many of their dirty little secrets. Secrets that I am sure they both think are long forgotten. Oh, the companies, even a small country or two, I could bring down if I was ever to choose to.” With a pfff and a wave her hand as if she is dismissing the thought, Penny continues, “Like I would want to?” Continuing on, “I don’t know how much of old grandfather Nigel’s story he told you but I want you to think, do you know Houston’s full name?“

  Slowly shaking my head, she said,” I’m not surprised because he hates it. His full name is Nigel Houston Donovan.” You can imagine what kids called him when they found out his first name. Up until he went away to college, we all called him Nigel. His mother still does.

  This woman is crazy. I don’t know if I can believe one thing she is telling me. Right now, that is not the issue. Houston is the issue. “Where is he? Tell me the truth.” I am beginning to panic, the more she talks the worse I become. “You just said you stopped him from coming home to me. How did you sto
p him?” What if this woman had hurt him? You hear about those kinds of things happening. “Did you hurt Houston?”

  With a sinister laugh, only one word escapes her ruby red lips, “No.” Sweetie, I did tell you the truth. He went home. I came to see him. A little surprise. I was in town and thought I would drop by to say “hello.” He had no time for me!”

  “You are lying. You just said you were in town and just dropped by to see Houston. A few minutes ago, you implied you came to Miami to meet me. So which is it?”

  Closing her eyes and just barely shaking her head, in a voice dripping with sarcasm, Penny asks “Can’t you keep up? I thought you were clever! Back to my story about earlier. He was rushing around talking to Nash. Don’t look so shocked. Of course, I know Nash. I know Jeff, also. Unless he has taken on new bodyguards, I know all of them. He was discussing some nonsense about telling someone something. Anyway, he sent Nash on an errand.” Pointing to the sofa, “While I sat right there, where you are, he went into his bathroom to shower and change. He left me alone. It was almost as if I didn’t exist.”

  Looking over at his desk, sneering as she speaks, “I walked over to his desk and his cellular devise was just laying there. I was shocked. Houston rarely leaves it laying around, as I’m sure you know.” Still looking toward his desk, she shrugs and continues, “For some reason, he must have turned off the password protection because when I touched it…”

  That term, cellular devise, flashes back to me. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I have heard Houston call his phone that. I think it might have been one morning when we were showering. Closing my mind to what this horrible woman is saying, I think back.

  Snapping her fingers, “It woke up just like that. I’ve always been a quick thinker. So, I seized the moment. I went to his recent calls and there was your name. Imagine my surprise when it said video chat?”

  Sitting there with an indescribable expression, a cross between hatred and pride, she continues. “First, pretending to be Hugh, I sent you a text to come to him. I gather he was going to surprise you by picking you up in the limo from what I read of his conversation with Jeff. Then, I sent Jeff a text not to pick you up. That plans had changed. I told him to take the night off. I ordered that new taxi for you.” Smiling an evil smile she continues, “He came out of his bathroom smelling so good, looking so good. I knew he couldn’t be here when you got here. So, I told him you had sent him a text that said you felt bad. That you needed him. You can bet he took off out of here as fast as he could.”

  Looking at her with all I can muster. I force myself to focus on Penny. “Why are you doing this to me?” I manage to squeak out. From what I see in her eyes, I am beginning to think this woman is deranged. She says, “I have my reasons. I’ve always loved him. At first, it was an infatuation as usual with little sisters. He was always around. Then all of a sudden, he wasn’t. I didn’t find out what happened to their friendship until I was older.”

  We sat quietly for a minute. “We were celebrating me returning to work, tonight.” Suddenly, I feel like it was important for her to know how long we had been together so I randomly blurt out, “We planned on celebrating our six month anniversary, also.” Looking at me as if I have sprouted two heads, Penny repeats me as if she is asking me what I have just said, “Six months? What?”

  “I’ve known Houston six months next week.” Sighing, I want her to know, I’m not giving up easily. Finally my new inner girl is taking over, my mid-city girl is stepping up. “I said we have been together six months. Practically from the day we met, we have been together.” Now, it’s my turn. Reaching up to my neck, I finger the necklace, trying to draw strength from anything I can. Seeing the smug look on her face change to disbelief, I continue.

  “I love Houston. Whatever the two of you have “shared” in the past, I would think is over. You just said he acted as if you didn’t exist. Well, maybe from his view, he doesn’t see you as anything other than his past. You are correct. He does put his company first. What businessman on his level doesn’t? How would it have grown to be the size it is now? How could he be one of the richest men in America if not the world, if he didn’t put Highland Diversified first? Any woman, including myself must understand what loving the man that owns a company the size of his means.” Glancing over my shoulder, I realize we are no longer alone. Turning around, there he is. Jumping to my feet, I want to rush to him and feel his powerful arms wrapped around me.

  Penny shoots him a quick question, “Houston, what are you doing back here?”

  Somehow the way he answers her almost expressionless stops me from moving to him. “You know exactly what I am doing here, I found out from our doorman, to my surprise that Charli had left in a taxi. I wondered why she would do that. That is when I began to put two and two together as they say. I rushed back here because I realized that I left you in my office and that unfortunately, Charli was more than likely with you.”

  Taking a deep sigh, “Oh Hugh, I had this all under control. Why did you come back here?” Rolling her eyes she answers her own question. “I know you just said you came back for her. Thinking with the wrong head again, Houston? You just can’t keep it in your pants, can you? That has always been a problem for you hasn’t it?”

  She rattles on, “While you were in the shower, I sent Jeff a text from your phone telling him that his services wouldn’t be needed.” Pointing at me but keeping her eyes on Houston, she says, “then I sent a taxi for your little love bug here.” Standing in the doorway of his office, by the dark expression on his face I can tell Houston is seething as she opens her mouth to speak.

  “Penny, I want you out of this office and my line of sight, right now! I will handle this discussion between Charli and myself.”

  “Like you have handled the last six months? Come on Houston, six months? She doesn’t even know the real reason your paths crossed, does she?” With the fiercest look I have ever seen, he bursts into the room as if he is a Marine storming the enemy but with the roar of a lion, he yells, “NO!” Not coming to where we are but going to his desk, he jerks open a drawer, removing something. It looks like some type of book. For just a minute I’m not sure who the enemy is, me or her. Looking at him, I begin to realize this isn’t the Houston Donovan I know. I’ve never seen him this angry. As a matter of fact, I am not sure I have ever seen anyone at his level of anger. What I do understand is, he needs to calm down. With this knowledge, I calmly say “Houston.”

  Turning slowly he looks at me as if it is the first time he had seen me tonight. With a voice as tender as I have ever heard escape from his lips he says, “Charli, we need to have a conversation but it doesn’t need to be here. It does need to be between the two of us.” Looking over at the woman across from me he adds, “Only the two of us. You can leave.”

  “You have got to be kidding? I am not about to miss this little scene. You owe me that much Houston. If you have what I think you do in that book, my suggestion would be for you to put it back.” Continuing to hold the book that I now plainly see has some papers sticking out of the side of it he walks away from his desk. I understand this is the emotionless, world dominating Houston not my sexy, passionate Houston. This definitely isn’t the same Houston walking to me that has been so kind and loving. The tone of his voice is firm but one I don’t recognize.

  Penny is right. I don’t know this Houston. I’m not sure I want to know this man, either. Tipping my head just a little to the left, I am fighting with myself not to gasp as I watch this man walking toward me.

  Holding out his hand to me, I stand. Looking at him searching his eyes for my Houston, he says, “Charli, you are stunning tonight. I am sorry for what is about to happen. I ask you no not ask but beg you in advance for forgiveness. Please know that when we began I never meant to hurt you.” “Whatever you have to say to me, just do it here. Now, get it over with.”

  With a curt businesslike nod, instead of guiding me to the door, taking me by the elbow, we solemnly walk toward the conf
erence table. I stumble. Is the room spinning just a little or is it me? How could this be happening? Three hours ago, I was the happiest woman alive. Wrapping his arm around me, Houston leans across me pulling out one of those cream chairs at the very same table I fantasized about just a little ago. Standing there. I take a deep breath, close my eyes and sit down. This horror isn’t a dream.

  Opening them, I see the despicable woman sitting across from me. I’m still trying to place where I’ve seen her. Our eyes are locked in what feels like a battle. A battle, I fear I am loosing. Houston sits down at the head of the table unbuttoning his grey suit jacket. Even though he is tieless, he looks natural sitting there. As he looks at me first, then at Penny, his facial expression is unreadable. This is the businessman. This is a side of him I have never seen before. I’m not sure I ever want to see it again. I don’t know which of us is causing the expression.

  Turning to me, businesslike and almost emotionless he speaks. “I want you to understand, I started this between you and me with one objective. I wanted to get to know you. I wanted to spend time with you. Somewhere along the way, I developed true honest feelings for you. The passion we share is real.”

  “Houston, you are scaring me. Please tell me whatever you think you must say.”

  The things you are going to hear will forever change your thoughts of me. I understand that but you must hear them.” Pausing for a second, he begins. “Charli, the story I told you is partially true. Remember, when I told you about my name. What it was based upon? How I created a lie? Then, I used that same lie to my advantage?”

  Looking at those chocolate eyes, “How could I forget that night?” Unconsciously, I found myself reaching up to touch my necklace. I had used that exact same motion to give me comfort several times these past few months. Now, I’m beginning to wonder if the necklace was special at all. At this very minute, I wasn’t sure what it was.