Unmasked Heart: A Regency Romance (Regency Romance: Challenge of the Soul Book 1)
Page 25
With a tug, she secured her bonnet and tapped her spectacles to a higher spot on her nose. Leaning into her mount, she forced the horse to catch up to William. Now they walked side by side.
His head pivoted in her direction. The handsome planes of his taut cheeks looked as if he chewed nails. He was angry at her, surely at her blood. There was no future for them.
Before their engagement, she and William were friends. Was that gone too? Gaia patted her brown saddle. "You don't need to be concerned. I'm not going to fall from my seat."
He opened his mouth, but then snapped it shut.
"William?" Panic laced through her. She'd lost all of him. She clutched the straps with a stronger grip. "You can tell me what you are thinking."
He looked away. "Just hang on to that horse. We'll be at the coaching inn within the hour."
William spied the inn at the top of the hill. The wind pushed at his back. Normally, it helped to make up time, as when he led his men across the fields of battle. He sighed and forced Magnus into a reduced pace.
Slowing his gait for Gaia, it would be a miracle if he got there before the post chaise left.
His insides raged, twisting his guts. This battle between what he'd learned of his father versus Gaia not telling him would surely kill him. If he'd barked out the questions in his head, she'd run from him as she did over his foolhardy assertions about Mary. His bloviating was a match to his father. How could she ever think William was any different?
He spied Gaia. A tense crinkle assaulted her forehead. Oh, how he'd love to reassure her, but there was nothing he could do to make up for Vicar St. Landon's cruelty. What could replace the love of a father for Gaia? His soul burned, for that was a question he couldn't answer, being St. Landon's son.
Gaia made her mount move closer to his. "Did you say something?"
The glint of her spectacles blinded him for a moment. He blinked a few times and thought of something safe, far from his vulnerable heart. "Why would your sister leave all her family and friends? Does she know what this will do to your family?"
Gaia hung her head, as if she examined the filly's hooves. "We have not been on the best of terms lately. She probably feels alone. Loneliness can lead one down the wrong path."
William tugged at his collar as memories of one of his father's sermons sparked. Reverend St. Landon would already condemn Miss Julia as naturally given to wantonness and evil. How many lives had he ruined? "We'll stop her."
"We need to talk about us, our fathers."
Magnus stumbled over a rock, snapping William's attention back to the trail. He didn't have the words to make things better, but one person did. God, give me the words, the right ones to say.
Did he whisper that aloud? Must be Gaia's influence.
Going around a fence and slogging across a dirt lane, he steadied Magnus then pulled to a stop. They'd arrived at the coaching inn. With a quick breath, he leapt down and stormed into the livery, towing both the horses. "Let me help you."
Before he could get to her, she'd slid down. Wide hazel eyes settled on him. What was she thinking behind those spectacles?
Resisting the urge to hold her close, he turned to the door. "We'll find your sister."
She put her jittering palm in the crook of his arm. The touch felt as if she was scared to put her fingers on him.
As he handed Magnus and the mare to a groom, he saw Stelford's stallion. Maybe the man caught up with them and kept a vigil. In spite of everything, Stelford acted like the friend, the brother he once knew. A sigh left his chest as the years of confidences came to William's remembrance. "Gaia, we aren't too late. Stelford's here. I guess he wasn't lying about wanting to make amends."
Her hand tightened about his forearm. She seemed to mumble Stelford, and then looked up at William with the sweetest eyes, wondrous windows that had to understand the delicate balance he now bore. Stelford, friend and enemy. "I am glad he told you. What a disastrous two days, to discover such secrets. I'm sorry."
"We'll talk of our elopement, once we stop this elopement."
He ignored the way her face scrunched up, and walked her toward the inn. Two days of chaos ended now. William pressed open the door and slunk inside. The scent of ale and cooked onions and mutton hit him. The crowded inn hosted many tables and travelers.
On the far side of the room, Miss Telfair sat alone, slumping at a rough-hewn bench and a dark-stained table, sipping from a cup. Clad in a chocolate walking gown, an innocent frilled collar, and a perfectly-pinned blonde chignon, she looked out of place, lost.
An arm tugged on his shoulder. He spun and spied Stelford.
"I followed the wrong sister." His former friend bowed to Gaia. "Good to see you, Miss Gaia Telfair. I bought off the driver to leave without all the passengers. The couple is stuck here until the next coach heading out tomorrow morning."
"Thank you so much." Gaia straightened her bonnet then marched toward her sister.
William grimaced at Stelford as his mind counted the lies shared between Elizabeth and this man. The scale didn't balance with this good. "Why didn't you leave?"
With a lift of his shoulders, Stelford shifted his stance. "I couldn't let your fiancée's sister come to disgrace."
Taking a slow breath, William focused on the Telfairs. He needed help to dissuade this elopement. If Gaia couldn't convince the sister, maybe the man would be a better route. "Where's the dance master?"
"Oh, that's what he is? I thought he looked the spinning type, all long and lanky. He took a room. Miss Julia Telfair hasn't moved from that seat."
"Good girl; already having second thoughts." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small sack of coins. "Give this to the dancer, and tell him to forget about this entire incident."
As he started toward the sisters, Stelford clapped his shoulder again. "I know we're not restored, but I hope we are on the path to reconcile."
William shook free. The Lord hadn't answered that prayer yet, and William didn't possess the grace to do it on his own. "Let's finish this, and we'll see."
Stelford dropped his head and walked away, rebuffed. Maybe now he felt a tenth of the spurn William had borne, trying to win Elizabeth's approval. Yet if there had been no Stelford, wouldn't Elizabeth have chosen another? William let the steam out of his nostrils. Elizabeth never loved him. And now, because of his father, Gaia wouldn't either.
Gaia stared at the girl who, next to Seren, had been her closest confidante. It was as if a stranger sat on the other side of the table, muffled in brown. Gaia gripped the edge of the wood separating them. "Why are you doing this?"
Her sister's eyes grew wide, and her tall posture sagged even more as William stepped near. "What is your fiancé doing here?"
"He came to help talk you out of this." Gaia gripped Julia's gloved palm. "The question is why you are here."
Julia pulled away, and lowered her gaze to the handkerchief she twisted around her thumb. "Eloping."
William sank next to Gaia and wove his fingers with her fidgeting ones, stilling them against the table. "For an eloping woman, you don't look happy."
Julia shrugged and started rolling the cloth tighter. Her brow raised as her chin lifted. "How am I supposed to look? Like Gaia? She's been proposed to twice."
"Twice?" William released Gaia's palm and rubbed his jaw. His shoulders dipped as he turned Gaia's direction. "Since your sister hasn't broken with me yet, we're still engaged. The botanist is free. Mr. Whimple is still available for you to go after."
"Oh, who cares about the leaf-searching man!" Water trickled from her eyes. "All my family's expectations have been on me. And my younger sister is the one to make two men come up to scratch." She patted her wrinkled handkerchief to her face. "What does that say of me?"
"Your fortunes are not tied to anyone." Gaia made her voice sound steady and strong, but fear for her sister set her spine trembling. "This isn't right. It's not like you to be this reckless."
With a roll of her eyes, Julia sat
back against the bench. "What? To be married before my little sister is reckless?"
William rubbed his neck as a stream of air left his nose. "Never marrying might be better than wedding someone who can't or won't cherish you."
Julia bit her lip then sat up, eyes wide. "Being an old maid is to be preferred? I should aspire to be a governess or companion to your children?"
Gaia's cheeks warmed. The thought of having William's children, of building a full life with him, had teased her mind long into the night. But that hope was gone, wasn't it?
Emotionless, thinned lips graced his face, his gaze boring into hers. "So, Miss Telfair, you'll cast your lot to the first one to propose?"
"That's what Gaia did. She agreed to marry you, because you asked. Everyone knows she...." Julia looked William's direction then closed her mouth.
Tapping his fingers against the rough oak of the table, William closed his eyes for a moment. So much emotion seemed trapped behind his calm exterior. If only Gaia could know his heart.
"Things change. Hearts change too," his voice was low, and he folded his arms. "And if you've found happiness, we should celebrate it, but you are running off with no thought of your family. The dance master might be a wonderful and deserving young man, but you are a genteel woman. Some might not look well upon this match. You have to have enough love for the rough patches. Do you?"
"No gentleman has asked." Julia wiped her nose and held the cloth, as if she could hide her wet face. "I'm tired of waiting."
The pain in Julia's voice made Gaia tear up. "You're a good person. The prettiest spirit when you're not fretting. You deserve to be happy."
William reached into his pocket and drew out his handkerchief. The monogrammed fabric whipped in the stagnant air as he offered it to Gaia. "Did this young man, knowing the disappointment an elopement will bring upon your parents and your younger sisters, have enough respect for you to ask your father's permission?"
Her head bowed. "No, but he didn't care if my shyness robbed my conversation. He drew words out. I know he cares for me." Julia's gloved hand fisted. "None of the gentlemen did. They each abandoned me."
Something about her sister's tone alerted Gaia. Was it a streak of defiance or fear? "I don't think you wanted them, Julia. You've been sabotaging these matches."
"You two should go, forget I existed like the rest of our friends and family will."
"No, Julia. You've had opportunity after opportunity. Even Elliot. What are you doing, sister?"
She peered at Gaia, her eyes drifting to the right, as if a thought consumed her. "You don't remember, but our parents’ marriage was not good. They argued, fought over things that shouldn't matter." Julia reared up and strengthened her voice. "No, I don't want to marry just anyone, but I fear being left alone. I hoped a gentleman would like me enough to lead me from my shyness, opportune me to converse. Then I'd know he truly cared about me, not my measly dowry, or looks that will fade."
"Only the dance master made you shed your facade?" A whip of air vented William's nostrils. His level shoulders hung lower and his gaze went high, maybe to the whitewashed ceiling. "I knew a woman, as beautiful as you. So lovely, it didn't matter that her conversation was small, as were her interests. She married, not for her heart, but to meet her father's expectations. The man possessed the right connections, but the things important to this groom did not interest her. She pretended it did, and the fool swallowed the act."
Julia rubbed her forehead. "Let me guess. They learned to love each other's differences and lived happily ever after."
"No. They both were miserable until one left the earth." He leaned in close. "She should not have pretended to be a certain way just to gain a husband. You can't be one way to attract someone, then change and expect a man to not care. Life is too short to make that kind of mistake."
No air of joke lay in his stiff demeanor. His torment over his marriage still sat on his chest. If Gaia could, she'd embrace him. William didn't deserve this yoke.
"You needn't marry." He took Gaia's hand in his, the first time since Mrs. Wingate's announcement, and kissed it. "With your sister marrying me... or her other beau, the Telfairs will be protected. Now you have time to make yourself happy."
"But what do I say? My fiancé's upstairs." Her cheeks flushed scarlet. "He's waiting for me."
Mr. Stelford marched into the front door and made hand motions, but nothing like what Gaia and Timothy practiced.
William nodded then leaned toward Julia. "Mr. Stelford has just returned from visiting the dancer. This honorable lad, who proclaimed to love you, has run off and left you for fifty pounds.
Julia fell onto the table, heaving with tears.
Gaia went to her sister's side of the table and scooped her up into her arms. "This is a blessing."
William glanced at Gaia. His gaze locked with hers. "When a man really loves you, he'll do what it takes to win you. He will try to earn your trust. He'll be patient and give you the world if you so desire. And he'll think of you and your family first. Running off would be a last resort, not the first. He'll even end a farce if he thinks it is for your good."
The intensity in his sea-blue eyes caught Gaia's breath. Her pulse raced as she hugged Julia tight. She lifted her sister's chin. "Rediscover what makes your conversation, your talents, sparkle. Show the world that you are not only beautiful, but also accomplished and witty. Let them love you like I do."
"But Gaia, Cheshire, I've ruined myself. The scandal will come out about this elopement." Julia wrenched from Gaia's embrace and banged her head on the table. "Now this scandal will impact all my sisters. I'm so sorry. I need to go away."
Gaia brushed her hair, stroked her cheek. "We'll be fine. William knows how to fix this. His family knows how to solve problems."
William looked at her as if she'd slapped him. He stood and adjusted the brim of his beaver hat. "I'm going to rent Julia a chaise to take you home. If we get this done quickly, no one will be the wiser."
After a final wipe of her eyes, her sister balled up her handkerchief and stuffed it in her reticule. "Please, send me home."
Thank goodness, Julia wouldn't toss her life away. Now if they could sneak her back to Chevron, life for the Telfairs could go on as normal.
But Gaia wasn't a Telfair by blood, so her life couldn't return to normal. It was time for it to be spectacular, but how could that ever happen without William being a part of her future?
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Return to Ontredale
WILLIAM ADJUSTED HIS greatcoat. The wind had picked up, and the air held the scent of rain. The sun had set about an hour into the route home. Gaia rode at his side, silent.
"I should've insisted upon you going back with your sister. You must be tired."
Gaia glanced up at him. "My brother is waiting for me at Ontredale. And we haven't had a chance to discuss anything."
He craned his neck to look over the tree line. He could make out the roof in the moonlight. "Well, Ontredale's not much farther. We'll even pass the path to the old vicarage."
A yawn left her mouth. "You suppose Vicar St. Landon passed judgment over my father there or at Chevron?"
Turmoil stirred in his gut; part shame, mostly guilt of his bloodline. "It's late. You and Timothy will stay, and I'll send you home by carriage in the morning."
She shook her head. Her straw bonnet bounced with the effort. "We need to talk."
He nodded and motioned for Magnus to speed up. The last thing he wanted was to allow his muddled thoughts to rein. Something awful like the truth was bound to come out.
Gaia slumped in the saddle. "William, Ontredale's over the bend. Pray, let's stop a moment."
Riding aside must've taken a toll on her. She needed to stop and rest. Tugging her mare's harness, he led them to a grassy knoll under a canopy of trees.
Gaia fell into his arms as he lifted her from her mount. "You are a very strong man, but what of your strength over the past?"
Patting away
her arms, he stepped back. "Well, Stelford, the backstabber, wants me to forgive him. I'm grateful he made sure the coach left without Miss Julia and the dancer, and that he's following your sister's carriage back to Chevron, but he and Elizabeth were lovers."
Coming closer, Gaia's sweet whisper made his spine stiffen. "Maybe you should forgive him, and I will forgive your father."
He couldn't help eyeing her as if she'd lost her mind. "Well, if I'm dolling out these measures, I should forgive my father, too, for selling my fiancée's father to certain death. Slaves have no right outside of England. They are property again. I'm the son of slaver, perhaps murderer."
Gaia shook her fists in the air as frustration overwhelmed her. "Your father is dead and so is mine. What of us? Tell me what you are thinking on the matter. I can't take not knowing your heart."
His jaw tensed, but he forced out the words that had stuck in his head since Mrs. Wingate's pronouncement. "Can you honestly say you can forgive my father for selling yours into slavery, for lording over the adultery, being judge and juror, like there is no grace?"
Her shoulders hunched as she looked at the grass beneath them. "I didn't know your father. The only memories of him I have are his sermons."
Not a good enough answer, but she'd initiated the interrogation; he'd ask about everything that blocked their path. "Gaia, how long have you known of this business? Were you going to marry me without telling me?"
"I intended to tell you, but you promised a long engagement. There would be no need to expose this sordid affair if we decided not to wed. I was to tell you after church, but you had to mix up your tinctures and nearly die. How could you be so careless? Don't you know I need… Mary needs you?"
"What did you say?"
She covered her mouth for a second. "When you insisted we elope, I came today to tell you. I had no knowledge of your father's hand in my father's fate."