Irresistible Desire (A Savannah Novel)

by Danielle Jamie

  I find my mother and father’s faces in the crowd and they’re both beaming with pride. The man they care so much for is finally proposing to me. I’m suddenly blinded by flash bulbs going off all around me. Great, this is going to be all over the news tomorrow. I always imagined this moment being romantic and intimate, just between Logan and I; not surrounded by glaring women and a ton of strangers that I didn’t know.

  I force a small smile on my face and stare down into Logan’s eyes, he looks so nervous. I can just imagine all the thoughts bouncing around in his head right now. I take in a deep breath, and slowly let it out trying to find the strength to say something, anything. All I can get to come out of my mouth is, “Logan?”

  “Savannah Elizabeth Livingston, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

  I glance around at everyone watching me and try to swallow the lump in my throat. I reply simply with, “Yes.” Logan jumps up and sweeps me up in his arms kissing me passionately. Not caring at all about the thousands of people all around us. His rules about PDA have just flown out of the window, as I agree to be his wife. Caught up in the moment I return his kiss and when he finally sets me back on the ground my head is spinning. I suddenly feel another set of arms wrap around me, I recognize the perfume. It’s my mother.

  “Oh, I am so excited, it has been so hard keeping this a secret from you sweetie, Logan asked your father earlier this week for your hand in marriage, isn’t that the sweetest thing? Very old fashioned.” My father stepped around my mother and pulled me into a hug. “Congrats sweetie, you’ve found an amazing man. I know Logan is going to make you very happy.” He kisses me on the cheek, and walked away to talk to some paparazzi, probably wanting the first statement on my engagement.

  “I cannot believe this really happened,” I manage to spit out. I glance down at my hand, regarding the massive diamond sitting on my left ring finger. It looks to be a three carat, princess cut diamond, surrounded by smaller diamonds in platinum gold. “The ring is beautiful… I pray I don’t lose it.” I laugh nervously.

  “Don’t worry sweetheart, I imagine he has insurance on it, so if you do somehow misplace it, he can get a new one.” We talk for a few more minutes as people walk over and congratulate. I feel like I talk to more people in that ten minutes, than I did the rest of the night. I need to get away from these people and their prying questions, so I excuse myself, feigning the need for the ladies room.. I just start walking towards the bathroom when Brooklyn jumps in front of me and drags me inside.

  “What the fuck just happened?” Brooklyn spits out through clenched teeth, with a look of pure shock and rage pouring out of her eyes. “I cannot believe Logan pulled a stunt like this Savannah. I am telling you, this proposal is nothing but a big publicity stunt! Logan knows better than anyone, the perfect way to ask you to marry him would have been at the ocean, just you and him. Not. Like. This!” She quickly wraps me in her arms and whispers into my ear, “You don’t have to agree to this Savannah. I know you would never want to hurt his feelings, especially in front of all of these people.”

  “I’m okay, really I’m fine. I admit it’s not my dream proposal, but he had his heart in the right place. He probably wanted to make this night special. It’s a really important night for him and his company. I don’t think he would ever use me to get more press time for this party. That’s ridiculous, he wouldn’t do that.” I feel like I am trying to convince myself as much as I am her.

  When we walk out of the ladies room, Logan was waiting for me, my mother must have told him where I was. He links his fingers between mine and leads me over to the lobby. There was press everywhere, “They want a statement on our engagement,” he grins, flashing his pearly white teeth at me.

  “What about the announcement for the winner? Shouldn’t we be in there while they pick the winner?” I ask, mainly as an excuse to get away from the press, I couldn’t care less who wins.

  “It’s fine. All the guys from my agency are in there, along with the guys from Sunset. I think they’ll survive without us.” He quickly turns back towards the paparazzi and their probing questions.

  They want to know if we’ve set a date set, if this was a spur of the moment proposal, or had been planned. Perhaps the most shocking question of all is whether I’m pregnant. Would I seriously be downing flutes of champagne all night if I was? After what feels like an eternity we’re finally finished with the fire storm of questions and head back inside to the party. It was only around twelve thirty, but I imagine people will be partying until the early morning hours. I find Brooklyn leaning against our table, talking with Reagan and Megan. They finally decided to rejoin the party, after the drama of Logan’s proposal.

  Logan’s phone is buzzing in his pocket and I can tell he wants to answer it, “You can get that, I’m going to go show off my ring to Reagan and Megan they haven’t had a chance to see it yet.” I kiss him quickly on the cheek and head over to them. I glance back at Logan and see his face turn a deep red as a consequence of the text he’s reading; I hope it’s nothing serious. He’s having such an amazing time and I don’t want anything to ruin his night.

  “What the hell Savannah? I leave for what? An hour? To come back and find out you’re engaged?” Reagan grabs my hand. I glance at Megan who looks in awe over my giant rock.

  “I’m sorry! You’re the one who ran off for hot elevator sex with Miss Megan over there.” I say winking in her direction.

  “That is a big ass diamond!” Megan squeaks as she admires it up close. You are one lucky bitch, you know that right? I swear every woman around here wishes they were you right about now... The future Mrs. Logan Sanders.”

  “Well I am definitely not wishing that, I would rather walk across hot coals than marry him.” Brooklyn blurts out. All this champagne has gone straight to her head.

  Megan and Brooklyn glance over my shoulder, both wearing puzzled expressions. I turn around to find we are being approached by one of the many women who has been staring me down all night. She stops a few feet away and extends her hand out to me, she was holding a hotel key card.

  “Logan is in room 267, he asked me to bring you this and to have you meet him there.” She says dryly with a phony smile plastered across her face. I take the card from her well-manicured fingers and as soon as I did, she spins on her heels and stomps away.

  “Well that was odd,” Brooklyn says, watching the woman walk away, completely confused. “Well you better go see what lover boy wants, he probably booked a suite for you two tonight.”

  “You have a ride home?” I ask Brooklyn. She came with Reagan, but it looks to me like he’ll be leaving with Megan. “If not I’ll go up and talk to Logan, let him know you need a ride home and I can have his driver take you back to our place?”

  “I’m fine.If Reagan can’t, I can always call a cab. I’m bored out of my mind anyways, I think I’m going to go to Vertigo and have a few drinks.”

  I smile. “Okay, as long as you’re sure. I’ll see you in the morning I guess.”

  We all say our goodnights and I zigzag through the crowd of people that still fill the ballroom. When I finally make it to the lobby, I slip off my heels and carry them to the elevator -my head is spinning from all the champagne and I really don’t feel like spraining an ankle tonight. I walk past a couple getting hot and heavy against the wall by the elevators, they are so wrapped up in each other they don’t even acknowledge me waiting there.

  Finally I hear the electronic tone and the doors slide open, I quickly step inside and push the button for floor twenty six. On the way up, I lean against the wall of the elevator in an attempt to try and stop the small space from spinning, knowing that in the morning I’m going to wake up with the world’s worst hangover. I glance down at my left hand and admire my engagement ring, watching it twinkle under the bright lights. I always imagined getting engaged to Logan, but never in a million years thought it would be this soon. We’ve been together for four years, but he always said he didn’t want to
settle down until after we were both stable in our careers. There’s no way of knowing if he wants a long engagement or a wedding in the near future. I guess we have a lot to talk about, but not tonight, tonight we will celebrate.

  The elevator came to a stop and the doors open up to a group of people dressed in nightclub attire waiting to get in. I excuse myself and squeeze past them, heading down the hallway to Logan’s room. My head is still foggy; I haven’t been this drunk since my days at UCLA and it’s making fumbling through my purse to retrieve the key card more difficult than usual. I find it and shakily slide it in to see the light flick to green. At least I’m alert enough to get into the room, I laugh to myself. I bet I’m a sight to see, walking around the Roosevelt hotel barefoot and stumbling around with my heels and clutch in my hands.

  I enter the room and look around the suite, Logan isn’t in the living area. He must be in the bedroom setting up our romantic night. I cannot wait to be with him… a week without sex is killing me. My vibrator just isn’t cutting it. I start towards the bedroom door when something catches my eye, a pair of women’s, red high heels sitting by the couch, and a lipstick marked glass of champagne. Panic instantly starts running through my veins, like ice sending chills all over my body. I am sobering up quickly, as my stomach starts to twist into knots.

  I slowly tip toe over to the door of the bedroom and stop in front of the door, my hand hovering over the doorknob. This cannot be happening, someone must have slipped something into one of my drinks and I’m just hallucinating. I can hear a woman giggling on the other side of the door. A million thoughts begin to flood my brain. Maybe Logan gave the room to one of his business partners to use

  and I got here before he could let me know. There has to be a logical explanation. A man doesn’t pledge his love to a woman in front of thousands of people, and moments later cheat on her, does he? That only happens in the soap operas Brooklyn watches. Not in my life.

  I finally let out the air I’ve been holding in my lungs. I didn’t even realize I was holding it as I listened to the noises and voices on the other side of the door. I freeze when I recognize Logan’s voice, telling her to go deeper. This is not happening. This is not happening! I just keep saying those words over and over in my head as tears begin to fill my eyes, feeling like acid on my skin. Taking a few deep breaths I finally regain my composure and turn the doorknob, I don’t think there is any way I can prepare myself for what I am about to see. I just need to open the door quickly and face what I find on the other side of it, stalling will not ease the blow I am about to face.

  *****

  Chapter 6

  *****

  My entire body shakes as I push the door open. As soon as I step into the bedroom my feet freeze to the spot and I can’t move. It feels like I’ve been sucker punched in the stomach and I can’t process what I’m seeing. I can’t move or even breathe. My eyes are locked on the bed, where Logan is laying, still dressed in his tux. Between his legs lies a red headed woman with long wavy curls obscuring her face. She is in her bra and panties, with my fiancé’s dick in her mouth.

  I finally snap back to reality and slam the door against the wall with a forceful blow that echoes across the room. The red head sits up quickly and Logan snaps his head towards the doorway, his eyes landing on me in a combination of panic and fear. The girl turns towards me with a smile creeping over her face, “So glad you could finally join us Savannah.”

  “What the fuck are you talking about Cara?” Logan barks at her as he sits up, fixing his pants.

  I can feel the tears pooling in my eyes again and I’m trying so hard to speak, or scream, anything, but the lump in my throat will not go down. I feel like I’m about to be sick. Panic has consumed my entire body; I should have just walked away. Why did I come into this room? I knew what I would find. I cannot believe this is actually happening to me.

  A single tear streaks down my cheek. I’m finally able to mutter out a, “What?” to, I guess her name is Cara, otherwise known as the red headed slut who was just giving my fiancé of about an hour, a blow job. In a room I thought was booked for a romantic night to celebrate our engagement, no less.

  Logan looks like he should have steam pouring out of his ears, “What did you just say? I want answers NOW!” He yells.

  She turns towards him and nonchalantly remarks, “I said it was about time Savannah got here, I sent Amanda down to the ballroom to give her the key card to the room after I sent you that naughty little text,” a devilish grin on her face, “I figured that since you’re engaged to her now, she could join in on our sexual rendezvous.’

  Logan leaps off the bed and runs towards me, grabbing my hands. I’m frozen again, trying to process the idea that this was all set up and the fact that it’s not just tonight that my boyfriend has been sleeping with this woman.

  “Savannah, it’s not what it looks like. She seduced me, preyed on my weaknesses. Please, say something!”

  “You really don’t want to hear what I have to say,” I manage between breaths, my words shaky.

  “Come on Logan, did you seriously think I would just sit back and continue to be your ‘fuck buddy’, once you got engaged to this bitch? You had the nerve to propose to her at the party, in front of me and who knows how many other woman you’ve screwed.” She slides into her dress and stands to stare at Logan, her hands resting on her hips, “I knew right then and there I was going to make you hurt as much as I was hurting, so…I booked this hotel room, asked Amanda to help me get Savannah up here. I knew as soon as I sent you a picture of me here, ready and willing to fuck your brains out, you would come running back to me. Your predictability and weakness for sex helped me make this plan a reality.”

  “You...stupid…bitch!” Before I can blink Logan is in her face and I’m scared of what he’ll do. I’ve never witnessed him be violent with any woman before, but he was so angry right now that there was no telling what he would was capable of.

  “STOP IT!” I scream at them, “I don’t care who did what tonight. I loved you Logan and to know that you could ever do something like this to me…it’s…it’s unbearable!” I take a few more steps into the room, walking towards him and Cara. I look her in the eyes with such intensity that if looks could kill, that bitch would be on the floor. “You want him so bad, you can have him. I’m done.” I grab the ring Logan gave me, the one that was supposed to symbolize love, trust and commitment, when in reality it was nothing but a fancy ploy to cover up his lies and betrayals. I yank it off my finger and toss it at his chest.

  He catches it and, stuttering his words, begins to plead for me to wait and give him a chance to explain. I’d heard and witnessed enough in the last ten minutes to seal our fate for a lifetime. I was done with Logan Sanders and as I walk out of the bedroom, I vow to never set myself up for this kind of heartbreak again. The tears run down my cheeks in rapid streams as I run to the elevator, pressing the button frantically and pleading with it to open. I hear Logan yelling my name down the hallway as he runs towards me and I close my eyes in an attempt to drown out the sound of his voice. A voice I cherished until about five minutes ago. A voice that now causes instant nausea to wash over my body. The doors finally open and I jump inside, pressing the button for the lobby. Just before they close Logan appears, pressing his hand against the door, and forcing them to stay open.

  His breath is erratic and his face flushed, “Please Savannah, don’t do this… don’t run away from me. We can talk about this, I’ll do anything to fix this, just please don’t go.”

  I don’t know what comes over me, but before I know it my hand is cracking against his right cheek with a loud slapping sound that echoes throughout the small elevator. My hand must be burning, yet with the adrenaline and pain of the night, I feel little more than a tingling sensation. Logan’s eyes grow wide and his mouth sits open, but nothing is coming out.

  “Goodbye Logan” I manage to spit out at him as I shove him away from the doors, to my surprise he stays back an
d watches the doors shut in front of him. I lean against the wall and slowly slide to the floor, pulling my knees up to my chest and dropping my purse and shoes drop to the floor with a thud. Wrapping my arms around my knees I cry the entire ride, my shoulders shaking vigorously as I sob for what feels like an eternity. Finally the elevator comes to a stop and the doors slide open. I slowly climb to my feet, grabbing my shoes and purse from the floor. I wipe away my tears, smooth my hair and try to regain my composure.