She didn’t know Tate, but she’d immediately wanted to help him. And had. Even if she wasn’t so alluring, that simple act of kindness would have made her impossible to forget.
The rest of the guys were being loyal to Danica. Hadn’t even accepted that she could—or should—be replaced.
Did that mean Malakai didn’t care about her as much? Did the fact that he couldn’t see beyond the opportunity for her and the band make him heartless?
He didn’t think so. But he also knew he didn’t think like the other guys.
Life was fucked up. Shit happened. He’d had to find a way to keep moving forward after failing people he loved. After realizing he hadn’t done enough. Tate was his second chance. A kid who needed a protector. Who needed to be saved from himself.
Looking out for Tate wasn’t easy, but Malakai had to do it. Wanted to.
The drummer was too fragile for the world he’d been dragged into.
And maybe that’s why he couldn’t stop thinking about the girl.
He had a feeling she’d need him too.
Chapter Five
The night had been weird. Shiori stretched and rolled on her side, glancing over at the empty bed. Which had been empty all night.
Coming to the hotel with Danica had been awesome. They’d talked a little about performing together, about the new choreographer, about big crowds, and crazy stuff that happened on tour.
But they hadn’t talked much about Shiori replacing Danica. About when that would happen. Or if it would happen at all.
The one time Shiori brought it up, Danica pointed out that Shiori’s contract wasn’t dependent on Danica leaving for an extended period. Technically, her presence could help free up Danica for any side projects.
Then Danica changed the subject. She wanted to know more about Shiori, but there was only so much she could say.
A little while after Shiori pretended to be asleep there was a soft knock at the door. Then a man in the front room, keeping his voice too low for Shiori to make out a single word.
Since then things had been quiet, so maybe Danica had fallen asleep on the sofa with him. Going out there to check shouldn’t be a big deal, right? Shiori was supposed to sleep on the bus last night. With a bunch of men she didn’t know.
Putting that off had been easy. After seeing the fight she’d been about ready to call this whole thing off. Her reason for wanting to know Brave and Alder was scrapped. She might as well go home.
Seeing the brothers talking had given her some hope, but they were…broken. There wasn’t a better word for it. She’d been so close to her sister. Missed her so much. If she had the chance to be with her every day, like Brave and Alder were, she’d be so damn happy.
It wasn’t like they didn’t know what it was like to lose someone. They’d both lost their older brother, Valor. They had every reason to fix whatever was wrong between them. From what she’d read about them, about Alder saving Brave’s life, they came off as closer than ever.
Reality wasn’t so pretty.
But maybe she was wrong. She was desperate to be wrong about them, and that was the only reason she hadn’t taken the next bus home.
Climbing from the bed, she glanced out the window, watching thick snowflakes fall as the sun began to rise. She shivered as she opened her suitcase, dressing quickly in simple black jeans and a band t-shirt. A Winter’s Wrath T-shirt actually. One she’d gotten a year ago for her birthday. She wore it so often it was a little faded, but the soft material felt good on her skin.
And would be perfect for the rehearsal. A rehearsal she’d decided she had to follow through with.
Seeing Brave and Alder talking once after a fight wasn’t enough. She had to give them another chance. This was too important to make any rash decisions. If she had to give up on them, who else did she have?
She’d be alone in a fight she wasn’t sure she could win.
But she’d do her best. In the end, there was only one goal.
Hiro being with her. Where she could protect him.
There was still time to see if she didn’t have to fight alone. She refused to waste it.
Pulling her hair into a high ponytail she headed into the main room, hesitating when she spotted a shirtless man standing in the middle of the room with a tray of coffee and fruit.
He shot her a big smile as he carried the tray to the round table by the picture window. “Good morning.”
“Good morning.” She could hear the faint sound of the shower. Must be where Danica had disappeared to. “I don’t think we’ve met.”
“We haven’t. I’m Jesse. Do you want some coffee?”
“Sure?”
“And this is the part where you introduce yourself.” He let out a light laugh when she stared at him. “Tate does the same thing. You could talk to him for an hour before he tells you who he is. Since you’re a fan, I’m guessing he wouldn’t have to tell you.”
“No, but…” She shook her head and grinned. “That’s a good point. I met both him and Malakai and didn’t introduce myself.”
“And you still haven’t introduced yourself to me.”
“Oh. Umm…Shiori.” She stuck out her hand. He gave it a light shake.
“A pleasure to meet you.” He poured coffee into two mugs. “How do you like yours?”
“Lots of cream and four sugar.”
His eyes widened. “Really?”
Why did it feel like a test every time she talked to these people? “Yes. Is that bad?”
“No, just surprising for a model. Danica takes some fake sugar shit and got Alder on it too. She talked me down to three sugars, so don’t tell her I’m taking extra this morning so you don’t feel left out.” He tore open eight packs, dumping them into the cups. “So what do you think of the band?”
His question caught her off guard. She grabbed the offered mug and took a gulp. With so much cream it was the perfect temperature. And braced her enough for an honest answer.
“I’m not sure.”
“Fair enough.” He took a few swigs of his own coffee and dragged out a chair by the table. Once he was settled, he eyed her curiously. “You don’t strike me as a metal chick.”
“Well, I am.” She pulled out another chair and faced him. “What’s your favorite band?”
“I should say Winter’s Wrath, but I’ll have to go with Limp Bizkit.”
Just the name of the band had her wanting to throw something at him. “Lame.”
“Really?”
“Yes. I think you should be fired. They aren’t even close to being metal. Or music. Or worthy.”
The bathroom door opened and Danica came out, glistening from her shower, wrapped in nothing but a towel.
She grinned at Shiori. “Girl, you just gained yourself a fan. Jesse, you’re such a jerk. Some people do like Limp Bizkit. Like me.”
“But they aren’t metal fans. You have an excuse, babe.” Jesse’s tone became all sweet. “I love you, anyway.”
Danica rolled her eyes. “Uh huh. Nice try. For that, we’re listening to them on the way to the bus.”
“Please, no.” Shiori shuddered at the thought. When she was little, her sister used to rant about how they’d ruined Woodstock ‘99. Neither had been old enough to know anything about the chaos that had ended the epic event, but her sister preached the metal blogs like gospel.
“You so owe her now.” Danica laughed and came over to the table as Jesse fixed her another coffee. “By the way, I’m sorry I didn’t warn you about him. He’s not supposed to be here. I was hoping you’d sleep a bit longer so I could introduce you.”
“I always get up early, but it’s all right. I need to get used to this.” Shiori wrapped her hands around her mug and looked down at the light brown coffee. “I thought I was ready, but I’m happy you had me sleep here last night. It’s…a lot to take in.”
“I know. But you’ll be fine. They’re good guys.” Danica gave Jesse a pointed look. He grabbed his coffee and disappeared into the bed
room. “Sophie didn’t give me details, but she implied you have some connection with Alder and Brave. Do you want to talk about it?”
Shiori bit down hard on her bottom lip. Sophie had said she needed to tell Danica something, but sharing details would be up to her.
And she wasn’t ready.
Soon, hopefully, she would be, but she still wanted the option to back out if she needed it. Back out without Brave and Alder knowing anything about her. About her sister and Hiro.
“Will you be mad if I say no?”
“Not at all. I know you have your reasons. And you’re more than a fan or you wouldn’t be here.” Danica finished off her coffee and stood. She made a ‘get up’ motion with her hand and Shiori stood. “Baby, this rehearsal is another audition. You can’t show up like that.”
“I can’t?” She smoothed her hands over her jeans. They were well worn and she knew she could move in them. She could dance in heels, but why bother for rehearsal? Danica always wore boots. Shiori didn’t have boots. Her black Chucks had seemed perfect.
“No. You can’t.” Danica motioned her to follow to the bedroom. “You’re close to my size. Let’s find you something that will make an impression. I hear one more person refer to you as ‘the replacement’ after this and I’ll lay them out.”
Being ‘the replacement’ for Danica didn’t seem like a bad thing. But she wouldn’t argue with her. Having someone like Danica to give her pointers was a once in a lifetime thing. No way she was passing it up.
A wardrobe change, hair and makeup overhaul, and Shiori was given the stamp of approval. For their breakfast meeting.
Which would take place right before they headed to rehearsal, but Shiori still felt weird going to a small diner with thick black eyeliner and a revealing outfit.
Thankfully, neither Sophie or Reese even blinked at her wardrobe. Or Danica’s, which matched hers. They looked like they’d both walked out of some anime. Danica could pass as a goth Sailor Moon.
And with all the red, Shiori would be Sailor Mars.
Only that chick was tough.
One look from Reese and Shiori wasn’t sure she belonged on Danica’s team. Or even standing in her shadow. She sat back as Sophie ordered for her and Danica, watching them silently.
Shiori hadn’t paid any attention to the order, but she was expecting yogurt. Or eggs whites.
Instead, the waitress set a blueberry muffin, waffles with syrup and whipped cream, and a bowl of fruit salad in front of her.
Prepared for another test, Shiori looked at Danica.
Who slathered butter on her own muffin as she spoke curtly to Sophie. “I’ll look at the contracts.”
“When?”
Danica tightened her grip on her knife at Reese’s curt question. “Excuse me?”
“I know I’m not your manager, but Sophie and I work together when it comes to your involvement with Winter’s Wrath. This delay is unprofessional. Shiori has been brought in to take your place. I need to know how much time she has to prepare.”
Ignoring Reese, Danica looked at Sophie, her eyes darkening with anger. “Is that why you went to the guys without me? I haven’t agreed to anything.”
“And you wouldn’t have. I’ve seen you discussing this with Alder. He doesn’t want you to go, but he pretends to encourage you. Danica, time’s up. Those contracts need to be signed today. I needed him to understand—”
“Not like this. After last night—”
“Because of last night. I knew seeing Alder lose control would make this so much harder for you!”
Through the window, Shiori could see Jesse standing by the band’s van. She wished she could be out there too. The back and forth between Danica and Sophie was hard to listen to. Why was she here? If Danica refused to leave they didn’t need her.
Of all people, it was Reese who spoke her very thoughts. “Sophie, I get why you wanted to give the band a nudge, but it’s not fair to drag Shiori into this.”
“Whether or not Danica leaves, having someone else on stage will draw the attention you’re looking for. Shiori has a place in your vision for the band. We need to clarify what that is.” Sophie glanced over at Shiori. “I can find you other work. I’ve told you that before. Do you still want this?”
Do I? It was humiliating, having people talk around her like she wasn’t there. Like she didn’t matter. Any other model would be seriously considering her options.
If she wanted to see more of the men, if last night wasn’t enough, then she had to accept nothing was guaranteed. But every moment mattered. Unless she was ready to tell them all exactly why she was here, she’d have to accept being the understudy. An understudy no one seemed to want.
“I want to dance for the band.” She met Sophie’s eyes and gave a short nod. She’d come this far. She wasn’t turning back now. But she didn’t like the position they’d put Danica in. “We have a month, right? Let the band decide what they want to do. Danica is one of them. I get that my performance might make her feel better about leaving, but it’s clear there’s more involved.”
Sophie inclined her head. “There is. But you don’t need to worry about that. Go on stage and focus on what you need to prove. This has become much more complicated than it needs to be.”
“No. This is my life you’re messing with. If you find that complicated, too fucking bad.” Danica shoved her plate away and stood. “Shiori, I’m sorry. Please know this isn’t your fault. But I have to go talk to Alder before this goes any further.”
Without Danica there, things got really uncomfortable. For the rest of the meal, Reese and Sophie talked business, trying to include Shiori now and then, though she had nothing to add.
Finally, it was rehearsal time and Sophie drove her to the rented space. They walked up to the second floor of a building on the edge of town, which looked like it had once been a ballet studio.
The stage was set. Speakers were placed in every corner, one end of the room crammed with the drum kit, amps, mic stands. At the other end roadies and bodyguards stood around chatting, but silence fell as she crossed the threshold. All eyes were on her, watching her through the mirrors lining the walls.
They knew why she was here.
And they hated her for it.
They hate that Danica might leave. They don’t hate you.
Sure felt like it, though.
Jesse approached her, an apologetic smile on his lips. “The sound won’t be great, but there’s plenty of space to move.” He gave her hand a little squeeze. “You’ve got this.”
She returned his smile, guilt weighing heavy on her chest. He shouldn’t be encouraging her. She’d been brought here as more than a performer. Her whole purpose was to prove the band didn’t need Danica. That they’d be fine with a replacement.
But if Shiori wanted to stay, she had to prove all that and more. Because convincing the band and the fans was one thing.
Convincing herself? A whole different story.
Chapter Six
Brave was not a nice person without sleep. Standing behind the studio they’d rented, he watched Skull, their oldest roadie, take a long, very satisfying drag on his cigarette.
Maybe secondhand smoke would kill the cravings. Coffee definitely wasn’t cutting it. And he’d had three cups. Black and hot enough to burn his tongue because he wanted it to hurt.
Things that hurt made sense. Physical pain he could handle.
Emotional shit? Not so much.
He’d been better off completely numb. Worrying about his brother, telling anyone how fucking scared he’d been…shit, at this point, no one cared what he thought.
But he’d done that. He’d pushed them all away.
Job well fucking done.
“What’s eating at you, boy?” Skull let out the smoke slowly, his lips curving slightly as Brave stared at his mouth. He chuckled and held out the cigarette. “Go ahead. A few puffs won’t kill you.”
Brave took the cigarette even as he shook his head. “The guys might i
f they catch me.”
“Bunch of hypocrites, the lot of them.” Skull folded his arms over his chest, not speaking until Brave inhaled deeply. “Life was simpler when they all hated you.”
Snorting, Brave opened his mouth to reply, but the smoke caught in his throat, sending him into a coughing fit. He bent over. Gasped in air.
As Skull laughed his ass off and pounded on his back. “You were saying?”
“They—” Another ragged cough. “—still hate me.”
“Then why would they care if you slowly kill yourself with this shit?” Skull had retrieved his cigarette at some point and went back to smoking like the damn thing hadn’t nearly suffocated Brave. “And before you call me a hypocrite, remember I’ve been doing this for almost forty years.”
“I smoked for fifteen.”
“Then you quit.” Skull’s lifted his shoulders like he couldn’t care less. “I won’t get on your case, Brave. You’re a grown man and lectures didn’t work when you were a cocky little shit, never mind now.”
“How about some advice?”
Skull’s lips slanted up slightly. “Might be able to manage that.”
Dropping his gaze to his knee length, worn leather boots, Brave swallowed hard. “I suck as a brother.”
“Yes, you do.”
“Thanks,” Brave said, dryly. “What am I doing wrong?”
“You’re trying to make years of damage disappear. Alder needs you, but he also needs to heal.” Skull dropped his cigarette and crushed it under his boot heel. “And that won’t happen if he’s still trying to hold everything together for you. Fix yourself. The rest will come.”
With that Brave was dismissed. He headed inside as Skull ambled off to the roadie van.
Fix myself? Brave tugged the length of suede binding his hair, letting it flow loose as he reached the rehearsal room. He had no clue what Skull meant, but he didn’t have time to figure it out. The band was all he and Alder really had anymore. Maybe they could build on that.
Stepping into the room he spotted Alder with Jesse and Danica. On the makeshift stage, Connor was tuning his guitar, laughing at something Tate said to him from behind the drum set.
Diminished (Winter's Wrath Book 2) Page 6
