Good Girls Ain't No Fun Boxed Set (The SIX romance and urban fiction volumes of the LOVE, SEX, LIES series)

by Jessica Watkins

  When I attempted to take off my heels, he told me, “Keep those on”, and I smiled pleasurably at his ability to make this moment even more intense.

  As he began lowering my body, he told me, “I’ve been waiting so long for this. I finally have you, and now I can’t figure out what to do to you first.”

  Once I lay over the steps in only my Chinese Laundry pumps, Jelani looked at me mindfully. You would have thought that he wrote the operator’s manual to my body, detailing every instruction on how to successfully please me.

  Jelani’s fornication began orally. He licked my great divide from front to back, making slow and wet circles around my clitoris, and then rapidly lashing it with his tongue, causing me to tremble and squirm from tension and pleasure. He ate with so much appreciation, as if it were an honor to taste me.

  With his hands firmly grasping my waist, he orally penetrated my body, forcing me to grind against his face. The sensation took my breath away and I began to succumb to the passion. I refused to fight him. If he wanted me in his face, that’s where I was glad to be. My hands secured his head as he continued his feast. I lay back against the step above me, looked into the heavens, and allowed him to gorge on my love.

  The pressure to burst in his mouth nearly brought tears to my eyes. My pleasure couldn’t figure out whether to exit my body in moans, cries, fluids, or tears; so it did all of the above. My sensations and orgasmic screams only made him eat with more power and purpose. I climbed half the flight of stairs attempting to take away his feast.

  When Jelani caught up with me, he grabbed my head and forced me to lay kisses on his chest as he secured his protection. I should have been ashamed at the way I thirstily anticipated his penetration. Jelani ignited a fire in me that had been dead for months.

  I melted when he infiltrated my secret garden. He fit into my pussy perfectly; like my ass in the perfect pair of jeans. Again, he was looking deeply into my eyes, daring me not to cum. He was like an orgasm messenger; equipped and ready to deliver. He dove into me so deeply; every stroke was a passionate attempt to convince me that we were right. My silky walls grabbed him and gave him kudos for a job well done.

  The only thing missing from this scene were the sensual croons of Maxwell and Sade, which epitomized the love and passion Jelani was giving me. Jelani was making love to me; slow, steady, and deliberate love. I felt drunk with it. I couldn’t get enough of it; yet at the same time, I feared it.

  I cried out to him; telling him how good it was and how great he was making me feel.

  “It’s yours, baby,” he whispered into my ear as he French-kissed it. “I promise it’s all yours.”

  His words and actions took my breath away. His love reeked of Bradley’s influence, so I spoiled my mind and body with it. I enjoyed the way he loved me, enjoyed the security of him on top of me; fucking me with admiration rather than vulgarity.

  He made love to me as if I were his. And prior to orgasm, it tasted so delicious and felt so right. As I began to orgasm all over him and he moaned words of encouragement into my ear, my body reacted with approval.

  However, when the smoke cleared, when thetwitches stopped, and I was able to watch him make love to me with a clear conscience, reality began to set in that a married man just genuinely made love to me.

  During the fifteen minutes it took for him to cum, I lay there telling myself that that was the last time Jelani and I could have sex.

  The sex between Jelani and I could only be taken so far and so deep before it was way out of line.

  We’ve reached that point.

  I wasn’t prepared to be a part of anything that disrespectful. The hurt in Bradley’s eyes as he found out about my infidelities has played repeatedly in my dreams, and it shouldn’t be so easy to bestow that hurt onto someone else.

  As I showered and thought of a quiet and gentle way to end things with Jelani, he entered the bathroom. I feared he wanted to join me, but he simply sat on the toilet in a bare chest and jeans with a blank stare.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Just finished talking to Evette.”

  I laughed to ease the tension that I felt. “Was it that bad?”

  “It wasn’t that bad.”

  “What do you mean?” My heart began to pound as Jelani sighed and put his face in his hands.

  “Man,” he groaned with irritation. “I just don’t want to go home.”

  “Why not?”

  Jelani then answered that things at home weren’t right between he and Evette; that lately he hasn’t been happy.

  “What’s wrong?” I was nervous. I really didn’t care what was wrong. I just wanted to make sure that it wasn’t me that was making him suddenly unhappy with his wife.

  “A lot of things,” he answered. “I’ve been hearing through our group of friends that she might be cheating. My feelings for you…”

  “Feelings for me?”

  “Yes, babe. My feelings for you.”

  “What kind of feelings?”

  “I care for you. I enjoy you. I anticipate being with you. I enjoy your company more than I do my own wife… I have feelings, which I shouldn’t have, for someone that I am not married to.”

  Suddenly Jelani looked more like trouble, rather than the passionate and intense person that I have been enjoying.

  “I think I should just leave the house for a while. Give myself time to get my head together.”

  Dread came over me. I didn’t know whether Jelani had significant reasons for feeling this way about Evette or not, but I needed to be sure that none of those reasons had anything further to do with me.

  “Chiiiiil', you better do somethin’!”

  I flinched at Cory’s squeals as I searched my medicine cabinet for medication. Jelani had given me a severe headache.

  He left about ten minutes ago, hugging me tight and kissing me softly before leaving.

  His affection scared the shit out of me.

  “I knoooow,” I whined. “What am I going to do?!”

  “Dump his ass, girl. As a matter of fact, get off the phone with me right now, call him before he gets home, and dump him.”

  “That would be so wrong.”

  “Worse than him going home and professing his love for you to Evette?”

  “What is she going to do? Beat me up? She isn’t my best friend or anything. I was dating her. She introduced me to her husband. What did she think would happen after she encouraged me to sleep with her husband, who is a great fuck, over and over again?”

  “Humph! You are soooo heartless.”

  It was sickening how this felt like déjà vu. Once again, I found myself easily deceiving someone and it felt disgusting. I couldn’t understand why I had such an emotional detachment to other people’s feelings when it came to sex.

  “I’m not heartless,” I told Cory. “It was just all a big mistake. I never thought it would get this deep.”

  “Of course you didn’t. It’s hard to think clearly when you’re getting so satisfied.”

  “So I should dump him?”

  “You don’t like him, do you?”

  “I enjoy him, but that’s it. I, of course, have no real feelings for him. The company was just nice.”

  “Then, hell yes, honey. Most definitely dump his ass-quick.”

  I sat on my bed regretting the obvious as I slipped into an oversized t-shirt .

  “I suck,” I told myself aloud.

  “You don’t suck,” Cory claimed. “Well, apparently you do suck, and quite well since you have married men leaving their wives.”

  Cory and I laughed as I told him, “Hush!”

  “I’m just sayin’. I’m glad I’m gay, chil’.”

  I was only able to talk to Cory for a little while longer before the Tylenol PM’s began to kick in. We said our goodbyes and goodnight’s, and made plans to have a drink tomorrow.

  Before allowing sleep to take over me, I decided to take the cowardly way out and sent Jelani a text that I hoped ended things
:

  Hey, baby. Tonight really scared me. I appreciate your feelings for me, but I could never have a hand in ending anyone’s marriage. I really enjoy you. However, it’s best that we end things here. It’s the right thing to do. I hope you understand.

  I thought it was short, sweet, and thoughtful. Surely Jelani would wake up in the morning fully recovered from his sexual hangover and realize that with Evette is where he wanted to be.

  Either that or he would realize that what he feels for me is lust and nothing more.

  I was glad to take either or.

  Thirteen

  Thursday, July 30, 2009

  LYRIC

  When I woke up this morning, I had thirteen text messages and ten missed calls from Jelani.

  Given the nature of his text messages, I opted not to return his calls. His text messages seemed very inappropriate for our situation. Jelani and I have only been sleeping together for a matter of weeks, but his text messagesmade it sound like we were in arelationship and had history. Hecontinuously said things like “What about us?”, “How could you do this to us?”, and “Why would you leave me just when things were going so great?” His words were too personal and made me extremely uncomfortable.

  The harassment continued while I was at work when I made the mistake of logging on to Instant Messenger. No sooner than I logged on, I began to receive instant messages from Jelani, as if he were sitting at his desk waiting for me to log in.

  [08:35] Naughty1979: Are you ignoring me?

  I thought there wasn’t any safer yet distant way to have this conversation, so I responded as I logged into my work email and began my day.

  [08:31] Flirtatious Nicky: No. Just waiting for you to calm down.

  [08:38] Naughty1979: So that’s it? We’re done?

  [08:39] Flirtatious Nicky: Don’t you think we should be?

  [08:40] Naughty1979: Hell no! I just told you yesterday that I have feelings for you.

  [08:41] Flirtatious Nicky: You’re married!

  [08:42] Naughty1979: Don’t leave me.

  My nerves began to freak out. I picked up the phone and dialed Tricey’s cell.

  She groaned and yawned as she said hello. “Hey, Lyric. What’s up?”

  I hadn’t told Tricey that I was sleeping with Jelani solo.

  Between my drama and her own, I hadn’t found a good time to tell on myself.

  When I took a deep breath before answering, Tricey interrupted by saying, “Oh shit. What happened now?”

  “Girl,” I said as I sighed. “I did the dummy and slept with Jelani… without Evette.”

  “Ooooo.”

  “I know.”

  As we spoke, Jelani began to get frustrated that my responses hadstopped.

  [08:42] Naughty1979: Please? Don’t leave me. Not yet. Is it because I’m married? I’m working that out. I never thought I would fall for you like this. I love you.

  Before I knew it, I logged off.

  Then I told Tricey about Jelani’s flirting and how, for the first time after losing Bradley, I felt content. In addition, I told her how I almost walked in on Evette and Bird getting it in.

  “Well, if she doesn’t respect her marriage, why should you?”

  “Exactly,” I said. “But it still don’t make it right.”

  “True.”

  Just then, my other line rang. I feared it was Jelani, but it was Cory. I answered and made the two calls a conference.

  “My two favorite love bunnies,” he greeted us.

  Then Tricey totally ignored my drama. “Hey, Cory!”

  “Hey, Pregnant Bunny!”

  Next, she asked him, “How are you, hun?”

  But I interrupted. “Um, can we get back to me and my scandal?!”

  Cory sounded all too happy for my misery. “Ooo, bitch, you have scandal?”

  “Weren’t we just talking about this last night?”

  “So you ended it with Mister?”

  “Yes.”

  Tricey said, “Hold up! I’m confused! What happened?”

  I explained to Tricey how good things have been with Jelani and I for the past two weeks; the attention, the sex, and the intimacy. I told her how he made love to me last night, and then confessed his feelings for me and disinterest in his marriage.

  “He claims it’s a mixture of things that has him feeling this way about Evette, but I don’t want that mixture to have anything to do with me!”

  “Right,” Tricey agreed.

  “So, I decided at that point that it was time to end things. I shouldn’t be sleeping with a married man anyway. That’s too much bad karma; especially after the whole Veronica and Bradley fiasco. Last night I sent him what I thought was a very sweet and thoughtful text message telling him how, though I enjoy him, we have to end things out of respect for his marriage. Then I woke up to a landslide of drama! He’s text messaging, calling, and instant messaging me! He keeps saying things like please don’t leave him and to give him a chance. Then he just told me that he loves me!”

  “Oh my damn,” Cory muttered.

  Tricey squealed. “What the hell do you have in that vagina of yours, girl?! First, Veronica was stalking you to death when you tried to leave her. Now, this married man can’t let you go. What do you be doin’ to these people?! Did you do voodoo on yourpussy?!”

  Cory and I laughed.

  “I just know how to love,” I replied.

  I wasn’t boasting. My ability to deceive has no influence on the way that I love. I am a woman of the fatherless tribe, so I love differently. I am submissive, attentive, and willing in my love. When I fell in love with Bradley, I was so appreciative to have a strong, powerful man in my life that it pleased me to no end to do anything to make him happy; even breaking Veronica’s heart. All my life there has been something missing in my heart, and I didn’t realize what it was until Bradley appeared with his ability to take care of me physically, mentally, and spiritually. There was nothing I wouldn’t have done to keep that security in my life.

  I was even willing to wash his feet as Lazarus did Jesus, because Bradley had also brought me back from the dead.

  I snapped out of my trance to check my cell phone. I knew Jelani had to have called. “This fool has called me five times!”

  “Just talk to him,” Tricey suggested.

  “I tried talking to him on instant messenger, but he messed that up when he told me that he loves me.”

  “Instant messenger is so distant,” Tricey argued.

  Cory rebutted, “That’s the point, love!”

  “Thank you, Cory.”

  “Both of you hens ain’t shit,” Tricey said. “Lyric, though you’ve only been sleeping with him solo for a few weeks, you have been with himand Evette for quite some time. You don’t know what kind of feelings he’s had for you all of this time. You have to be more careful with people’s feelings. Just because you’re emotionless doesn’t mean everyone else is.”

  In a sense, Tricey is right. I am unconscious of other people’s feelings. If I love you, I love you. If I don’t, I don’t, and there is nothing you can do about it.

  But in this sense, Jelani has just outright lost his damn mind.

  “I think you just need to leave the threesomes alone, honey,” Cory recommended. “First, Veronica and Bradley. Now, this hot mess. Just try having normal sex for once.”

  Cory had a point. I have done nothing in the past few years but cheat myself out of happiness. Because of my greed, I either ruin love or sow bad seeds.

  I have become my own adulteress, cheating myself out of love.

  LYNN

  “This chick gone make me whoop her ass and throw her in the baptism pool.”

  I giggled, but Vic didn’t find anything funny. She was pissed. Luckily, we were standing outside the church, so no one could hear her profanity.

  Once again, Taij came to Bible study. Once service was over, Pam bee-lined towards him. When Vic approached him to say goodbye, Pam gave her a smug look behind Taij’s b
ack.

  “She looked me up and down! I haven’t experienced that since high school!”

  “What did you do?”

  “What I went over there to do. That’s the father of my daughter. I can talk to him until my face turns blue. I finished my conversation and walked away.”

  I don’t care how hard Vic tries to act, I can see her jealousy from a mile away.

  “You shouldn’t have made it seem like you were so cool with him going out with her anyway.”

  “Lynn, he and I are not together. If he doesn’t date her, it’s going to be somebody else, or her and somebody else, considering how he gets down.”

  I gave her warning and disapproving eyes as I said, “Don’t do that. Stop bringing up the past. The man has obviously changed. He’s in church every week for God’s sake!”

  Vic simply rolled her eyes and before I could say anything else, Taij exited the church with DeSire close behind.

  “This is all too weird,” Vic whispered as Taij approached. “He needs to find another church home before I lose my religion.”

  Taij looked like a deer caught in headlights. I guess both Vic and I unconsciously wore disapproving looks on our faces.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing,” Vic quickly answered Taij as she picked up DeSire.

  “I’ll see you all tomorrow,” I told them as I quickly made my exit.

  Travis had been waiting in the car, and given the tension between us for the past week, I didn’t want to keep him waiting too much longer. I even opted to leave the children at home tonight in case Travis and I get into yet another argument since, every time we’re forced to be within ten feet of one another, we’re at each other’s throats.

  It is painfully obvious that I have fallen out of love with my husband. It is also painfully obvious that Travis is too egotistical to help me fall back in love with him. I am old enough to realize that marriage cannot be all about feeling butterflies in my stomach when I see him and hearing birds sing when we make love, especially after over ten years of marriage.