Errant

by Armas, Florian

  “Hi Codrin,” she said, passing with no other reaction, and I caught a trace of a malicious smile on Bucur’s lips.

  Codrin nodded without a sound, and I was unable to react in any way. After a few more steps together, he turned, whispering, “I forgot to say something important to Vlaicu.”

  He missed lunch, but still had to come to the council. Pale and with a chilly calm, he stayed silent and never glanced toward Saliné or Bucur.

  “Codrin,” Mohor finally reacted to his lack of presence. “We need your opinion, too. You will go with the army,” he avoided the word lead, not yet sure about who would lead what.

  “I have nothing to say,” Codrin shrugged.

  “We are discussing the marching plans,” Mohor insisted, surprised by his answer.

  “It’s too early to make a decision. I am waiting for some important information.”

  “It seems that we don’t deserve to be informed that is it too early to discuss this,” Aron snapped, and I saw that Mohor was angry at Codrin. “We should stop bothering you.”

  “Any discussion brings something useful,” Codrin said, calmly. “Why should we stop it?”

  “Such as what?” Mohor seemed now as calm as Codrin, but I knew better.

  “I didn’t know that Tohani castle is so close to the border and to both the northern and southern roads to Mehadia, for example.”

  “And why is this so important?” This time Mohor was ironic.

  Codrin either did not recognize or ignored it, and answered blandly again. “If we burn the castle, their desertion rate will increase. The faster the better.” Mohor frowned, but this time he was listening; Vlad had already explained to us that some Knights might prefer to stay home, to defend their lands or enter in agreement with us. “They already have some desertions. It happens after a lost battle. Remember what happened with your army. Theirs is better organized, but not by much.”

  I was not sure it was the best argument, but I did not interfere.

  “And you ‘organized’ our army in one day,” Aron snorted.

  “In an ambush, the level of organization counts for less. Continue with the plans,” Codrin let him know that things were closed, and he would not tolerate another distraction. There was a sudden power in Codrin’s voice that pushed Aron to react in a strange way: he gaped, saying nothing. Codrin’s reaction surprised everybody – I saw it perfectly in the sudden glances going back and forth around the table. The council continued as if Codrin was not really there.

  The same thing happened at dinner. I was surprised that he accepted the invitation. Strange as it looked, he was physically present at all events without any protest – a silent ghost.

  “Saliné, could you please tell me what happened?” I asked her after dinner.

  “Nothing happened,” she tried to avoid the discussion.

  “You seem to be much closer to Bucur,” I said, cautiously.

  “It’s better like this,” she shrugged.

  “What’s better like this?” I insisted.

  “There is nothing between me and Bucur, but I can’t have another period like...” Her voice faded. “Like I had. You don’t know how hard is for me. And it is better for Codrin too, he must forget me. We will never be together; you know well why.” There was a slight reproach in her voice, but I did not react. “Don’t think that it was easy for me to let him see...” She stumbled, but I understood that she let Bucur get closer to her in front of Codrin on purpose. “But I hope it will be easier to face my fate, even when I did not ask for it. Codrin will leave for two months, and with his anger, it should be enough to forget me. He must forget me, so I can forget him, too.” Again, the slight recrimination, and again I did not react; everything I could say, she knew already. “At least I have a purpose for everything I am doing, my family, but Codrin did not deserve all this.”

  She could have been right, there was some truth in her words, yet deep inside me I knew instantly that everything was wrong. My inner warning was illogical, like any other feeling, and even worse, I knew that things could not be changed for the moment without harming Saliné even more, and I was suddenly afraid. This time it was the result of my own logic. Nothing can be done for a while... And it is my fault too, I should have talked more with her after Bucur revealed what Codrin said to us about her marriage. She will calm down while Codrin is away. And Bucur will be gone too. Two months... It may be enough to regain her inner balance. I wish to know what is in Codrin’s mind. Small as it is, they still have their chance to be together. This time, I had to work in reverse, and find a way to keep some slight bond between them.

  “I am glad that you feel better,” I tried to please her, and stop her self-recrimination, and my own thoughts. “I hope that Codrin is well, too,” I said without thinking, and there was a nervous reaction from her.

  “Codrin can’t be well right now, mother, because of what I did, but he will not let us down.” There was no doubt in her voice, and I realized that she might know him better than me. “He may choose to leave after the war, at least for a while. Maybe he will come back, and Vio will be luckier than me.”

  Embracing her to offer some soothing, I was the one in tears.

  Mohor was already in our bedroom when I entered after leaving Saliné, and he stared at me. “What happened to Codrin?”

  “The same old story, Saliné,” I shrugged, trying to avoid another hard talk.

  “And what is new in the old story?” he stubbornly continued, and I could not blame him.

  “Saliné decided to underline that they don’t have a future together.”

  “He already knows that.”

  “Yes, he already knows that,” I tried again to avoid a straight answer, not sure how to handle the new thing.

  “Jara,” he said gently.

  “She used Bucur to create a rift with Codrin. The next two months away from Severin should do the rest. Don’t think that it was easy for her.”

  “Not the best time,” he sighed.

  “Maybe not, but I can’t change things back. Codrin will not let us down,” I repeated Saliné’s words, to assure both Mohor and myself.

  “Well, it’s in his interests too,” Mohor said thoughtfully. “We gave him only twenty-five hectares of land for his victory in the battle, just enough to keep him close. He said nothing, but we all know that he was not, let’s say, impressed by our gratitude. We agreed that it was the best way. Didn’t we?” He glanced at me, and I just shrugged, the ‘best way’ did not convince me at all, but Mohor found an unexpected ally in father. Both wanted to be sure that Codrin would not achieve Knighthood before Saliné’s wedding, so he could not claim our promise – we could not afford to fulfill it, and we needed Codrin. “As agreed, we give him a hundred hectares from Mehadin’s land and make him a half-Knight, if everything goes as planned.”

  “And if it doesn’t?” I asked, annoyed by his condition; it was something new.

  “Who knows what happens if it doesn’t,” he shrugged evasively. “After Saliné’s wedding, we will make him Knight. He deserves it, but only after the wedding. I don’t want more complications. Codrin has a strong sense of allegiance. I know, it goes mostly to you and … Saliné. And just when I made the right step, sending Bucur away,” he complained again about Saliné’s decision. “Keep Saliné and Bucur separated or out of Codrin’s sight until the army leaves Severin. I have no other embassy to send Bucur on.” He stopped, unsure how to continue. “Aron said something vague about strengthening our bonds if the thing with the Devans fails.”

  “And Bucur told Saliné that the marriage contract with Devan may be cancelled. There is nothing vague in their strategy. Aron and Bucur should not know about that. Codrin insisted on keeping his warning between us.”

  “I could not hide such a thing from Aron. He is my Spatar, and part of all important decisions.”

  “Am I part of those important decisions too?”

  “You should not ask that. Sometimes I keep things from you, b
ut not the important ones. You are doing the same, mostly with things related to Codrin. I understand that. You should understand me too. I agree, it was wrong to pass over our agreement without telling you, but as you said, I can’t change things back.”

  “We can’t change them back, yet we should be prepared if Codrin finds out. Saliné will not tell him, but Big Mouth may use that lever at his own convenience. And the best lever he has is that he knows our information came from Codrin. Bucur underlined that to Saliné. And if Bucur knows, who knows how many others do.”

  “Yes, that would be the most inopportune thing,” Mohor agreed, too late, that it was wrong to let Aron know about Codrin being our source.

  Vio became upset after a while; Codrin’s absence was affecting her. She tried several times to reach him, yet all she could get were a few words and some ruffling of her hair. Codrin always spoiled her, even when our relations were cold, yet for some unknown reason, this time she was included in the general chill set by Saliné.

  “Mother,” Vio complained, after three days of keeping her chagrin inside. “Why is Codrin so upset? He no longer speaks to me.”

  “It’s my fault,” Saliné whispered, visibly unhappy. “But I can’t help you now.”

  “Spend less time with Bucur,” Vio snapped, and I saw Saliné whitening, unable to answer. “You don’t deserve Codrin.” Vio ran to her room, and without a word, Saliné left me too, stumbling on her way out, leaving me speechless.

  Vio is no longer a small child. Why did she say that? Does she want Codrin, too? It could be a solution in the long term, but now? And Saliné... This is what I was missing.

  A day later, I found Vio’s room empty, late in the evening, when I wanted to see if she was sleeping well. We were about to alert the guards, when Codrin arrived with her almost asleep in his arms – they had spent the evening reading and talking together. Despite all his own sorrow, Codrin felt that Vio was upset, and came back to her.

  Knowing now what was in Saliné’s mind, I thought the next day was the right time to speak with Vio.

  “Mother, Codrin has changed,” she said, and I could read the worry in her voice. “He is still gentle and friendly. Still my brother, but something has changed. He is … it’s like his blood is cold, like he doesn’t want to live anymore. I am… I am afraid.”

  “Vio,” I said, taking her in my arms. “Codrin is upset, now. Nothing more. It will pass.”

  “Saliné and Bucur…” she said furiously, but I covered her lips with my fingers.

  “Shh… It’s not what you think. I will explain to you later how Saliné is trying to help Codrin.” I stared at her until she no longer tried to react. “He is just upset, but he understands that nothing can be done, Saliné will marry the young Devan. We need that alliance to survive, and it is not easy for her. You know it. They both know it. Sometimes there is a delay until one’s heart agrees with one’s mind. Codrin is in that state now. It will pass,” I tried to assure her again. “Please don’t tell him anything.”

  My girls did not speak to each other for a few days, and I did not interfere, leaving things to settle by themselves, afraid that any discussion would make the matter worse. Saliné was too distressed to react in any way, but Vio was too young and nice to keep silent for long, and she made the first step.

  Encouraged by his opening up to Vio, I decided the next day to finally risk talking with Codrin, and went into his room, late in the evening.

  He stared at me with cold eyes. “I thought I could have some privacy in my own room.”

  “Codrin, we have to talk.” I raised my hand to touch his face, but he stepped back from me.

  “To talk, we have the council. Everything happened because of your intrigues to make Bucur the second marriage option for Saliné. Now please excuse me.”

  Anger filled me, and sadness because it was not true, and I breathed hard to calm myself, but I did not try to answer; it was not the right moment, nothing could convince him in that spirit of mind, and from that evening, he slept with the soldiers, outside the castle. Appearances were saved by the need to be closer to them, as he explained us in the next council, and that allowed him to avoid dinners with us.

  I skipped dinner too, walking with no aim in our garden, that was too small to liberate my mind from harmful thoughts until Mohor came after me, and I just yelled at him when he asked what had happened.

  “They leave in three days,” I told Mohor, trying to make him aware that our army was still without an official commander. Formally, it was Codrin, but Aron’s request to lead, and Mohor’s indecision, had turned everything upside down. We were with father in our restricted version of the council.

  “There is only one solution,” he sighed, and I stared at him with expectation. “I have to lead the army.”

  Mohor was not a real commander, and he knew his limitations, so in the end it was almost the same thing as before, a compromise trying to please both Codrin and Aron, by avoiding a formal subordination between them.

  It will not help… “Who will convince Codrin to come with you and Aron?” I asked.

  “You?” Mohor frowned. “Vio? We can’t use Saliné,” he sighed, trying somehow to hide his indecision behind her rift with Codrin. “I hope he is mature enough to pass over that obsession with Aron.”

  “Is Aron mature enough?” I asked.

  “I look after Aron, you look after Codrin,” he said.

  “Can you?”

  “Mohor,” father stopped us, “the main thing is not who leads whom, even when we should be clear that Codrin leads the army. The main thing is that Aron tried to assassinate Codrin.”

  “That’s not true,” Mohor reacted quickly with some anger in his voice – he was really surprised. “Aron had his revenge and you should not take everything Codrin says as true.”

  “It’s true,” father said, staring at Mohor. “And I saw the proof,” he added, before Mohor could protest again.

  I was not aware of any proof, yet father knew of it, he would not use such a cheap trick to convince Mohor. Why did he keep it from me? I had the uncomfortable feeling that I had been sidelined by Codrin long before our actual rift. He did not trust me…

  “I have to talk with Aron.” Mohor neither accepted nor rejected father’s version.

  “You will not talk with Aron,” father spoke evenly, in the commanding voice that he used rarely, and Mohor moved uncomfortably in his chair. “If Aron learns that Codrin is aware of his assassination attempt, everything will blow up. We should be content that Codrin was mature enough not to answer in kind. He took a great risk.”

  “You should have told me,” Mohor spoke slowly, giving me the feeling that father had not convinced him yet; there was a delaying strategy in his statement.

  “Not even Jara knew about the proof,” father said. “Codrin feared that she would let you know out of loyalty and then Aron would be informed too. It had happened with some other things, and we have a crisis right now between Saliné and Codrin that was stirred by a clever ploy, using knowledge that Aron should not have had. Aron is playing his own game, with interests that are diverging from our own. He is becoming a liability. A powerful one, and with all that loyalty you keep from the help he provided in the past, you must control him. The faster, the better.”

  “Are you schooling me?” Mohor retorted coldly, something that had never happened before with father – there was a good chemistry between them.

  “What bothers you more? That I am schooling you or that I am right?” father asked, his voice calm as usual.

  “I trust Aron.”

  “Everyone can be trusted up to a point. Aron is at that point now. We see it in his moves. Why are we having this issue with the commander right now, in the middle of a war?” father asked.

  “Because Aron deserves a second chance.”

  “Not because half of our Knights conspired with Aron against you?”

  “That too,” Mohor acknowledged dryly, and he looked more upset by father�
�s words than by the facts themselves. “I proposed a solution.”

  “Your proposal will become a solution only after you set the rules for the campaign,” father contradicted him. “We already know Codrin’s role. What do you plan for Aron? How you assure Codrin’s safety?”

  “Do you think that Aron should go too?” I asked, worried that Codrin could be harmed.

  “We have no choice,” father said, and I saw a glimpse of relief on Mohor’s face. “It’s too late to confront the Knights now. When the war ends, you must do it,” father glanced at Mohor. “And Codrin will be your best ally.”

  “Who will persuade Codrin? Things are cold between us right now,” I sighed.

  “I will do it,” father said, “after Mohor convinces me he is able to cover Codrin’s back. We have the best commander in our hands,” father stared at Mohor, “and this war is just the overture.”

  “I will give Ban and half of the guards to Codrin,” Mohor said, after a long pause. “We must keep Aron’s men away from Codrin in battle, but this should be the commander’s task.” He stared at us, but no one reacted; he was avoiding the main threat. “I will warn Aron,” he said in a rare display of tension, his voice edgy and harsh, “but I can’t guarantee anything more. And I have to give something to Aron, too.”

  “What something?” I asked, putting more pressure on Mohor; he was starting to move in the right direction, and it was good that he had acknowledged his partial lack of authority over Big Mouth.

  “After we conquer Mehadia, Aron will take over.”

  “Aron will take over the city and the land to organize your possessions, but not over the army,” father underlined, and Mohor nodded, visibly annoyed.