He was getting close.
I captured his lips as he thrust over and over into me, triggering my own release. Exhausted, I dropped forward onto his chest. I didn’t have it in me at the moment to stand up. My legs were like Jell-O. If I tried to move, I’d end up on the floor.
His hands caressed my back, the soothing motion helping to bring down my racing heartbeat. “I thought I’d never get to have you in my arms again. How glad I am to be wrong.”
“I missed being with you like this. You have no idea how many times I wanted to sneak you off somewhere for a bit.”
“Really?” He looked down at me. “I thought you’d kick my ass if I tried.”
“I might have. It couldn’t just be about sex. I needed to know you better. All of the time we spent getting to know each other helped me realize how good we could be together.”
“Yes, we can.”
He kissed me long and slow. When our mouths parted, I could see the exhaustion setting in.
“Let me help you get dressed and I’ll head home. You need some rest.”
I went to the bathroom and grabbed a washcloth to clean us both up. Colin lifted his hips and I pulled his sweats back into place before straightening my own clothing. When I looked up his eyes were half closed. “Stay with me. I can’t get to my room without Greg’s help anyway.”
That same vulnerability I’d heard in his voice earlier was back, but this time I think it was even more honest—uncensored. Colin was too tired to try and hide how he was feeling. He was always so guarded, hiding behind this wall, always trying to be strong and deal with everything alone. The fact that he was letting his guard down was encouraging.
His eyes slid the rest of the way closed and his breathing took on a soft, even cadence. The slow rise and fall of his chest settled something inside me. The possibility of losing him had been very real, something I wasn’t sure I would have been strong enough to face. Yet every day he strived to prove how strong he was. The stress on him had to be overwhelming. The only thing I could do was be there when he needed me. To be his rock.
Those thoughts continued to parade through my mind as I sat there, watching him sleep, until Greg came back from Tanner’s.
The next few weeks passed in a similar fashion. I’d go to Colin’s place for dinner, sometimes Greg would join us and other times he’d leave us alone for a while, but we would spend time doing normal stuff that other couples did. It was a good balance. It gave me the chance to get to know his friends better.
Each night without fail, I stayed until Colin was ready to go to bed. He didn’t appear to be sleeping very well. Even though he was making progress, he was always so tired; dark circles forming underneath his eyes, his attention span limited, and his energy levels consistently peaked and troughed with little to no effort.
I continued with my own physical therapy too. My shoulder was getting stronger every day. It felt good to have more mobility. I was able to do more than I had when I started. While that was a plus for me, I noticed the frustration building in Colin. He was tired of being stuck at home Tired of waiting for the moment he could start therapy and see progress of his own. I firmly believed that a small part of him still feared not being able to return to his unit, and I wasn’t sure what he would do if that happened.
Weeks passed in the blink of an eye. The day for Colin’s cast to come off had finally arrived.
If only I knew that one step forward would send us two steps back.
Chapter 20
Colin
Danielle and Joey arrived early to pick me up. The cast came off a week ago and the doctors finally felt it was safe to start physical therapy. There hadn’t been any indication of nerve damage on the scans, but they still weren’t sure whether I’d regain enough function to return to a combat role.
“Ready for this?” Joey asked from the back seat of the SUV.
“I’ve been ready for weeks.” I turned in my seat and winked at her. “I can’t wait to walk on my own. No wheelchairs. No crutches . . .”
A soft hand landed on my arm. “Don’t push too hard.”
“I won’t.”
But the sooner I could do things on my own the better.
We pulled up and Joey jumped out to open my door. I shoved down the frustration; after all, she was only trying to help.
Danielle brought around the wheelchair from the back and ducked under my arm to hold me up while I put all my weight on my good leg. Finally, after a lot of maneuvering, I put my ass in the chair.
“Nate and I will be back to pick you guys up in a bit,” Danielle said, followed by Nate’s little giggle from the backseat.
The sound was so sweet and innocent, it was hard to keep the smile from my face.
“We’ll meet you out front,” Joey said.
“’Bye.” Joey turned the chair and Danielle called out. “Do what you’re told, Colin.”
“Don’t I always?” I winked at her and let Joey wheel me inside.
We were greeted by the receptionist, and once we were checked in, Joey wheeled me down the hall to a waiting area. A tall woman with blonde hair, pulled into a tight bun, waited for us. She immediately introduced herself.
“Sgt. Maj. Colin Dunham?”
“That’s me.”
“Great. My name’s Renee and I’ll be working with you for the next few months.”
Hmm. No rank. “You’re not part of the Army?”
“No.” She shook her head. “My husband is. When the Army stationed us here last year, there was an opening for a therapist. And here I am.”
She took notice of Joey. “And you are?”
“This is my girlfriend, Sgt. Joey Brant.”
Joey’s eyes lit up. It wasn’t something we’d talked about, but with everything we’d been through together over the last few months, it seemed only fitting.
“It’s nice to meet you.” Renee gestured to the hallway in front of us. “Let’s head down to one of the examination rooms. I want to do a quick evaluation of your movement levels and ask a few questions before we get started.”
Joey pushed me down the hall. All I kept chanting in my head was “soon.”
Soon I’d be out of the miserable wheelchair.
Soon I’d be off crutches.
Soon I could walk around and take my girlfriend out to a restaurant without it having to be a big deal.
Soon.
Joey had convinced me to bring the wheelchair. She was afraid that I’d be too exhausted to hold myself up on the crutches when we were done. After seeing how tired she was after her first day of therapy I agreed, even though I wanted nothing to do with the chair anymore.
A little of my steam fizzled when each movement Renee made to check my mobility hurt like hell. Even so, I was determined to push through the pain. Eventually we went back out to the main workout area to start using resistance bands. I’d complete a few reps and when the weight was too light, Renee would change the band to increase the resistance. After the first few levels, it took more effort to push the band away from my body. That didn’t stop me from asking for more. If I didn’t push as far as I could go, I’d never get back to my old life.
By the end of the session the muscles in my legs were twitching. I reached for the crutches to get myself up just as Joey pushed the chair up next to the table I sat on. I had no plans to get into it but the moment I put weight on my leg, it buckled. Joey was ready and pushed the chair underneath me.
“Fuck,” I snapped. “I shouldn’t need this damn chair anymore.”
Renee sat on the edge of the leg press. “Did you believe that after one session of therapy, you’d be able to walk again?” Her brows were drawn while she examined me.
“No, but I’ve used the crutches before, why wouldn’t I be able to use them now?”
“Your leg has been stationary with little to no weight on it for the last six weeks. It’s going to take more than one day for you to be able to put your weight on that leg. Plus, you pushed yourself today.”
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“I didn’t. I could handle everything we did.” A hand curled around my shoulder, giving it an encouraging squeeze.
“Colin, I did it too,” Joey said.
Renee nodded. “Everyone does on their first day. They expect their body to work the same as it did before. We have to work up to that level, otherwise you’ll push yourself too far and your therapy becomes ineffective.”
“That’s what Derek told me,” Joey said.
“He’s right. You made it through some of our lighter bands today, but that’s only the beginning. I want to see you two hours a day, three days a week. As you progress, we’ll adjust the schedule.”
The idea that this was only the beginning was a blow, but I was determined to find a way to push through. “I’ll be here. Can I ask you a question?”
“Sure.”
“Do you think I’ll be able to return to duty?”
“Honestly, that depends on you. According to your records, the doctors haven’t seen any evidence of nerve damage and I haven’t seen anything today to give me cause for concern—all of that is a plus. But you have to put in the work and follow directions. If you can do that, I think there is a very good chance we can get you back on active duty.”
That was what I needed to hear. The frustration of earlier dimmed enough to bring back a little of the hope I had when I arrived. Now I had to hold onto it.
“You can do it.” Joey kissed me on the cheek.
We said our good-byes to Renee and set up my appointments for the next few weeks. Danielle was waiting out front, exactly like she said.
“How’d it go?” she asked, coming around to help me into car. Joey looked on. I knew she wanted to help but she still didn’t have the strength in her shoulder.
“Hard, but I’ll get there.”
“Don’t push too hard,” Joey said, climbing into the backseat.
“I know.”
“Who’s hungry?” Danielle asked, putting the car into gear. “I figured you could use a little more time out of the house.”
That quickly, the frustration returned. There was no way I would let them wheel me into a restaurant. I’d force myself to stay upright if I had to. “Sounds good to me.”
“Me too.”
Danielle pulled into the parking lot of a diner and I did a quick assessment.
Small parking lot.
Check.
Flat surface to the door.
Check.
No steps.
Check.
I could do this. I had to think of it like an extension of the therapy. The women climbed out and went for the wheelchair. “I’m going to use the crutches,” I called when the back door opened.
“Are you sure?” I couldn’t see her face from where I was sitting, but the concern in Joey’s voice rang clear.
“I’m good. I just needed a little rest. I’m good now.”
I wouldn’t even let them help me out of the car. Instead, I put all my weight on good leg and hoped for the best.
Joey’s eyes were wide the entire time. I placed my other foot down and almost cried out as pain radiated up my leg, but I bit the inside of my cheek to keep quiet. Slowly, I hobbled along to the restaurant, hoping like hell that they were following me because if I stopped and turned, I would collapse. Thankfully, by the time I’d reached the door, Joey had caught up and opened it for me. Danielle was a few steps behind, Nate and all of his stuff in her arms.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Joey asked in a low voice.
“I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?” I kept moving. “Table for four,” I said to the hostess. She led us right to a booth near the door.
“Because twenty minutes ago you almost collapsed when you tried the crutches, and now you’re sweating.”
“It’s hot. I’m fine.” My tone was short but I really didn’t want to get into it, or hear a lecture about not pushing myself too hard. I knew my body better than some therapist I just met.
Joey slid inside the booth first. Danielle was about to set Nate in his seat at the end of the table when Joey spoke up. “Can I hold him?”
Danielle smiled and gave Nate to Joey. She cooed and played with him in her lap. She’d make the perfect mom someday. She was a complete natural, and Nate took to her instantly. For a moment, I imagined her holding our child. I shook the thought from my mind. We had a long way until we got there.
When our lunch arrived, Joey put Nate back in his seat. The conversation between Danielle and Joey was easy; like they’d been friends for years. It was a good sign when one of the most important people in your life cared for the woman you could see yourself spending the rest of your life with as much as you did.
Throughout lunch, the pain in my leg increased—not that I mentioned it. I’d take some Advil when I got back to the apartment. For now, I tried to focus on other things. Anything to keep my mind off my leg.
Getting back to the car was harder, even with the rest I’d had. I barely made it and I had to grip the door handle to hold me up. Joey snuck up behind me and wrapped her arms around my waist.
“You’re going to hurt yourself,” I said.
“Not as much as you if you don’t stop trying to do things you aren’t ready for,” she snapped.
Danielle unlocked the car and I forced myself to climb in without any assistance. Joey groaned behind me, but said nothing as she climbed into the backseat. By the time we got home, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to make it into the apartment. Joey had already figured out that I was struggling and helped me as much as she could inside when Danielle dropped us off. Greg was still sleeping. He’d worked the overnight shift in the clinic for the last week.
Between the two of us, we made it to the couch. The first thing I did after sitting down was prop my leg up on the table. Some of the pain dissipated. My head dropped to the back of the couch.
“What can I do?” Joey asked.
“There’s Advil in the bathroom.”
“The doctor’s didn’t give you anything stronger?”
“They did, but Advil will be enough.” I didn’t mention I’d flushed them down the toilet. I was done with all of the heavy pain meds. I needed a true measure of how my leg was feeling.
“I’ll be right back.”
In no time, she was back, placing the Advil and a glass of water in my hand. Lifting my head, I swallowed the pills. She took the glass from me and I lay my head back down. I may not like her having to wait on me, but it did make me happy to know that she cared enough to do it.
There was movement to my left. I figured Joey had gone to put the glass in the sink, until I felt fingers at the waistband of my sweats and seconds later, Joey’s soft hand wrapped around my dick, pulling off a couple of strokes. My cock hardened in seconds. But that was no surprise. From the moment I met her, every time she touched me I was hard in seconds. I cracked one eye and saw her kneeling between my legs. My other eye snapped open.
“What are you doing?” Not that I didn’t already know, but we’d only been together a handful of times and not once had she made any move toward giving me a blow job.
“I think you already know what I’m doing. I’m going to help you forget about the pain until the Advil kicks in.”
As the wet heat of her mouth engulfed my shaft, my eyes rolled into the back of my head, pleasure pouring through me.
She was right. I completely forgot about the pain in my leg as her tongue twirled around the tip. I loved when women did that, but for some reason, the knowledge that it was Joey’s mouth made it a hundred times more incredible. Her hand joined her mouth, moving in tandem and it took everything in my power to keep from thrusting up into her mouth.
My balls drew closer to my body. “Oh, fuck, Joey. I’m gonna come.”
Not that I expected her to pull off, but I was still impressed when she continued to draw her lips up and down my shaft, pulling me over the edge faster than any woman ever had.
I bit my lip to keep from screaming out and waking Greg. The last
thing I needed was him running out to check on me and finding us like this. No one but me was ever going to see Joey on her knees. My vision blurred for a moment as the orgasm ripped through me.
She finally released me and came to sit next to me. I wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her down to my chest.
“That was unbelievable.” And it was. I was still trying to catch my breath.
“I’m glad I could help.” She snuggled in closer.
While I never wanted it to end, we were on the clock. Before I knew it, I’d have to watch her ship out. I had to hold on to her as much as I could.
I didn’t know how I would handle being the one to stay behind this time. But we still had time, even if it was limited, and I wasn’t going to think about it until I absolutely had to.
Chapter 21
Joey
The days passed faster than I would have liked. For the first couple of weeks, Colin scheduled his therapy to coincide with mine so we could spend as much time together as possible. I always finished first and would watch while he completed his last hour, his frustration evident in the crease of his brow and the clenching of his jaw on the car ride home.
Each and every day he pushed himself further than he should. His muscles would twitch and shake, and sweat would pour off him. Renee kept reminding him to take it one step at a time, but Colin kept barreling forward like a runaway train, determined to take his first steps without the crutches.
I entered the room quietly, not wanting to disturb their session. Renee and Colin were over by the parallel bars. She wanted him to practice putting his weight on his leg, using the bars to support himself and take most of his weight. That was too slow for Colin. He took one step with all of his weight on his leg and my breath caught in my throat.
His leg buckled beneath him.
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