His Rebel Heart

by Amber Leigh Williams

Adrian’s forehead creased. “But—”

  “Whatever you want from me, I can’t forget,” James said evenly. “I never forgot you. I certainly won’t forget the child we made together. And however selfish you might think I am for saying and doing so, I’m not slinking away and pretending that this never happened. I’m not staying out of the way. I want to meet him, Adrian.” Alarm broke apart in her eyes and he hurried to say more. “I want to talk to him. Know him.”

  “James, you can’t.”

  “Why not?” he demanded.

  “Listen to yourself,” she said. “All I hear is I want. What about what he needs?”

  “He needs a father,” James stated. When a lightning flash of indignation crossed her face, he lifted his brows. “Are you telling me he’s never asked about me? He’s never been curious about where he came from? Did you tell him I died—fell off a building, got trampled by bulls...?”

  “Of course not. Don’t be ridiculous!”

  “But he has asked, hasn’t he?” James knew he had her there. “He is curious.” When she was silent, he swallowed hard because his next thought perturbed him quite a bit. “Is there someone else—another man you’ve shared him with, trusted him to? Someone he thinks of as a dad?”

  Her eyes turned thoughtful and his heart banged away at his chest, knowing the answer.

  “Yes.”

  When he cursed again, a small smile ticked at the corners of her mouth. It was the first waver of mirth he’d seen from her. “Only...he calls him Granddaddy.”

  Van. She was talking about Van. Inwardly, James breathed a sigh of relief. “That’s good,” he said after a moment. “I always liked the old man...despite everything. But it’s not enough. Tell me it’s enough for the kid and I’ll walk away right now.”

  “It has to be,” Adrian told him. “For his sake, James, it has to be.”

  “For his sake...or for yours?”

  She gaped at him. Then she raised her hands to her head. Her fingertips kneaded at her temples as she huffed in frustration. “I know what’s best for him. I’m his mother. You left and—you’re right—I couldn’t care less what your reasons or excuses for it are. You can’t take it back, no matter what you say. There’s nothing you can do to fix it.”

  “That may be true for us—you and me,” James acquiesced. And wasn’t that a crying shame? “But Kyle is another story, and you know it.”

  “What I know is that you have to respect my wishes, as his mother.”

  James blew out a breath, prayed for patience. “Damn it, Adrian. Kyle needs me. Some part of him needs me.”

  “You don’t know him,” she said, leveling a finger at him. “So don’t for one minute think that you know what’s best for him. You broke my heart, James, but I’m a grown woman—I learned to deal with it and move on. He’s just a boy, and if you think you’re going to get close enough to break his heart, too, you’ve got another think coming!”

  He advanced on her, closing what little space there was between them. “You know what? The same goes for you if you think I’m capable of hurting a kid, particularly one who belongs to me.”

  “He’ll never belong to you,” Adrian shot back. “Not if I have anything to do with it.”

  He smiled because he knew without a doubt that he would prove her wrong. He’d prove his worth, both to her and Kyle. He’d earn his place in their lives, just as he’d earn his place in Fairhope. “We’ll see about that.” And just because it would catch her off guard, he hooked an arm around her waist. She stumbled into him, navel to navel, and gasped as his lips lowered to her ear. “By the end of this, you’ll both know you can count on me. I promise you that.”

  She balled her hands against his chest and twisted out of his grip. “Let go.”

  James obeyed. Spurred by the awareness that had flashed briefly across her face, he let his smile soften. “See you around, li’l mama,” he said in an undertone as he slipped by her, close enough to get a whiff of her scent. It was the same as it always had been—subtle, sultry with just a touch of sweetness. He trapped it in his lungs on his way out, striding confidently as he faced the blinding streams of sunlight.

  * * *

  “HE’S INSUFFERABLE.”

  Briar Savitt sipped her tea, not responding to Adrian’s heated words. The tea was infused with chamomile. Adrian’s friend had taken one look at her when she brought Kyle to Hanna’s Inn that evening and ordered her to sit while she put the kettle on the stove.

  In her checkered apron and high-necked silk top, Briar looked every bit the calm and collected innkeeper. Which was why Adrian had sought her out instead of Olivia, the matchmaker, or Roxie, the hopeless romantic. She’d needed a place to go that evening to avoid home and, more to the point, her neighbor. The inn offered the warm light of comfort and good food, and Briar was always willing to lend a sensible and sympathetic ear.

  As an added bonus, Kyle loved picking her husband’s brain. Adrian could hear Cole’s deep voice from the next room, followed by Kyle’s laugh and the squeal of Cole and Briar’s baby girl, Harmony.

  The homey noises soothed some of the frazzled edges Adrian had been struggling with for hours. She picked at the corner of the lemon square on the plate in front of her. She didn’t know how much she would be able to stomach tonight with her insides twisting and turning. Briar lifted the kettle from the trivet in the center of the round kitchen table to refill Adrian’s mug.

  “James Bracken might be a lot of things,” Briar said thoughtfully, “but I don’t think even he’d stoop so low as to drop the paternity bomb on Kyle out of the blue, if that’s what you’re worried about. Not without your say-so. He’d be a fool to, at any rate. Especially if he’s telling the truth about wanting to earn a place in Kyle’s life. You don’t do that by force.”

  “I wish I could believe that,” Adrian said, drinking the soothing tea. “You don’t know him like I do. He used to be rash, impulsive...he certainly didn’t listen to authority.”

  “I remember,” Briar said with a nod. Adrian sometimes forgot they had gone to the same high school. Briar and Olivia had graduated a couple of years ahead of her. “My mom and his were both involved in the church. The reverend’s death hit us all hard. And I’d hear the gossip about James when I came home from college for summer and holidays.” A line appeared between Briar’s brows as she studied the place mat in front of her. “Grief isn’t an easy thing to bear, especially when it comes suddenly.”

  Adrian pursed her lips. Briar would know all about grief, as her mother, Hanna, had died of cancer when Briar was fresh out of cooking school. “Be that as it may. It’s been eight years since he left. Longer since his father died. He’s a grown-ass man and I’d be a moron to buy that as an excuse for his behavior anymore. And besides, he didn’t leave me in the lurch because he was grieving.”

  “I know,” Briar acknowledged. “I’m not trying to make excuses for him. And I do agree that caution is your best plan of action as far as he’s concerned—particularly for Kyle’s sake. However, I have a hard time believing he’d come back to Fairhope unless he really did think he had something to prove, something to fix. It takes a great deal of courage to come back or to redeem yourself. Especially in a place where you experienced or were the cause of as much upheaval as he was eight years ago.”

  Adrian shook her head. “I don’t have it in me to feel sorry for him. I spent two months as his coping mechanism because his arrest cut off his other means of dealing with his problems, those of the substance variety. It took me a long time to accept the fact that that’s all I was to him.”

  Briar frowned, glancing toward the living room where they could both see the baby crawling haltingly across the rug, encouraged by the dark-haired man and the enthusiastic boy. She sighed and lowered her voice. “That’s justifiable. But after seeing Cole cut off from his son the way he was for so
long, knowing what it did to him...I’m sorry, I have a hard time agreeing that you shouldn’t at least let James try to earn a place in Kyle’s life, even just a small one.”

  “This is different,” Adrian told her. “Cole didn’t deserve to be apart from Gavin the way he was. Nothing in James’s past tells me that I should trust him.”

  Briar took a sip of tea and added, “So what are you going to do? You aren’t really going to send Kyle to The Farm to live with your parents, are you?”

  “No,” Adrian agreed.

  “You can’t keep them from seeing each other,” Briar pointed out.

  “I realize that,” Adrian said darkly. “And I’ll deal with that, too. Even if I have to set up an electric fence on the property line to zap James if he gets within five feet.” She felt too tired now to contemplate that particular quandary. “Is Liv still sick?”

  “She was here this morning,” Briar said. A small smile pulled at her mouth. “Asking about ginger. For nausea.”

  “So she is still sick.”

  “Yes, but...” Briar let out a laugh as she set down her mug with a clack. “Come on, Adrian. You and I have both been there. The first trimester is hardly a walk in the park.”

  “First tri...” The words trailed off as Adrian finally put the pieces together. She gasped and sat up straighter. “No! Olivia’s pregnant? I can’t believe this.”

  “Neither can she, bless her heart,” Briar admitted. “But she and Gerald are married. They’re happy. They just bought all of her grandmother’s land in Silverhill. It’s not like they don’t have the room, the heart or the capacity for a baby...”

  “Sure,” Adrian said. “But it’s Liv.” She shook her head when Briar raised a brow. “I guess I just never thought of her as a mother. Especially not so soon.”

  Briar tilted her head. “Did you think of yourself as one?”

  Adrian blew out a breath. “No. Not until I was.” Glancing toward the living room again, she felt the knots in her shoulders loosen. “Not until I felt the first flutters, those first kicks. And then not completely until I held him the first time, until he looked at me...”

  Briar smiled warmly. “And look at you now. The best mother any little boy could ask for.”

  “Thanks for that.” She’d needed the vote of confidence, Adrian realized.

  “Bring Kyle for breakfast tomorrow,” Briar said. “There will be quiche and beignets. Olivia and Gerald will be here, as well. You can avoid James for a bit longer and we can tell Liv she has another shoulder to lean on.”

  Adrian nodded. The promise of breakfast at Hanna’s surrounded by friends who were as close as family cheered her immensely. “We’ll be here.”

  “Hey, ladies!” Cole called from the living room. “Come see this.”

  Briar and Adrian walked into the living room in time to see Harmony standing on chubby bowlegs, her tiny hands clasped tightly in Kyle’s. The boy’s eyes were wide and bright on hers as he called out words of encouragement. Cole, grinning like a fiend, hovered close at Harmony’s back. When she took a halting step toward Kyle with little assistance, Briar shrieked and clapped her hands.

  Cole looked to her and they exchanged proud, bittersweet smiles before his eyes found Adrian’s. “She did it for Kyle.”

  They made a picture, the two giggling children. Adrian’s heart gave a little squeeze.

  “She loves him,” Briar said when her daughter held her arms up insistently for Kyle and he obliged by picking her up with a “Hoorah!” for her efforts. “Every time she sees Kyle, she lights up. And no wonder. He’ll be a bona fide heartbreaker before long.”

  “I know,” Adrian muttered sadly. “What the heck am I going to do?”

  “I’m still trying to get over the fact that my baby’s eating solid foods,” Briar said woefully. “I can’t imagine her growing up, dating, getting married...”

  “Liv’s right. Denial works wonders sometimes,” Adrian told her. “I’ll be sticking to it.”

  Cole walked to her, the proud papa smile not quite worn off. “Everything all right?” he asked, seeming to read past the nostalgic gleam to Adrian’s troubles.

  Adrian patted him on the arm. He was a damn good man. It hadn’t taken long for her to grow to love him, too. “Nothing a trip to Olivia’s tavern won’t cure.”

  His expression sobered as he narrowed his eyes on her face, a glimmer of doubt flickering in his dark eyes. “What do you say we all meet there tomorrow night? Liv mentioned it’s Monica’s night off, so Briar’s helping out behind the bar and her dad’s coming by to spend a few hours with Harmony.” He wrapped an arm around his wife’s shoulders, bringing her in close to his side. “I know we could both use a night out.”

  Adrian could, too. “I’ll talk to my parents, see if one or both of them can watch Kyle for a few hours. Anyway, it’s getting late. I know you’ve got to put Harmony down for the night and bedtime is fast approaching for her knight in shining armor, too.”

  “I’ll walk you out,” Cole offered. He followed them to the door of the inn. When Kyle bounded ahead down the front steps of the porch, Cole grabbed Adrian’s arm. “You sure you’re okay?”

  She hitched the strap of her purse higher on her shoulder, avoiding his gaze. The man could spot turmoil from a mile away. Probably because he’d been through the worst of it. Adrian had a fair sense that if she told him not just what was bothering her but who, he’d go storming off to take care of her business for her. “I’m fine, Cole. I promise.”

  Unconvinced, he searched her face. “You know if you need anything...”

  “I know,” she said with a small smile and patted his hand. “Good night.”

  CHAPTER FIVE

  CONCENTRATING ON ANYTHING but his son proved to be problematic for James, even with the grand opening of Bracken Mechanics right around the corner. The morning following the bombshell at Flora, James met Priscilla Grimsby at the offices of the local newspaper to talk about Fairhope’s newest business venture.

  Fortunately, the reporter skimmed the more sordid details of his past, even after she learned that he had been born and raised there. Though she did seem interested in the fact that his father had once been the town preacher.

  James frowned as he drove back to the garage, wondering just how many of those gritty details about his past would end up in Priscilla’s business column. Like her brother, Byron, she’d seemed quite interested in generating as much positive press as possible for Bracken Mechanics. He hoped for the best and put it out of his mind.

  The latter part proved easier than the first with Adrian and the blue-eyed child they had made together lurking at the forefront. He hadn’t the first clue how to prove to Adrian that he could be a good father, much less that he deserved her respect and trust.

  Regret was a barb he’d come to know all too well—regret over his father’s death, over how badly he had let things get between him and his father before the accident, over how far James had gone to avoid the resulting grief and loss...

  However, none of it compared to the regret he felt now knowing that Adrian had had to raise their son alone while also dealing with the heartbreak and humiliation she’d spoken of the day before. She’d faced it all on her own. Suddenly, his leaving looked an awful lot less like doing what was right and a lot more like the coward’s way out...

  Hell, if only he had known. Things could have been different. He would have made things different.

  His thoughts circled and spiraled, then circled again until the sun was hanging low in the west and he’d done all he could at the garage for the day. Scowling, he took one last look around. It was coming together, no mistake. Still, there were things that needed to be done, including hiring a couple of guys to help out. A fellow mechanic. A tow truck driver. Maybe somebody to man the phone and handle administrative tasks.

&
nbsp; As he locked the doors and pulled the grate over them, a mud-caked Dodge pulled into the parking lot and parked next to the tow truck. James noted the gun rack in the truck bed and the two nuts hanging by a silver chain loop off the back exhaust pipe. He crossed his arms as the driver door opened and a familiar figure jumped to the ground from the raised cab. James scanned the faded jeans, the plaid shirt and the red-bearded face and shook his head. “I’ll be damned,” he said as a smile stretched across the man’s mouth.

  Dustin Harbuck took off his sunglasses as he approached James in dirty work boots. “Jim Bracken,” he greeted James. Dustin wore a battered camouflage baseball cap with a shiny, silver fishing hook clipped onto the front of the bill. Stretching out a large hand, he pumped James’s fist. “Been gone long enough, brother?”

  They weren’t brothers. In fact, they’d only been friends for a brief stretch of time. All the Harbuck boys were more than a little rough around the edges and daredevils to boot. A few of them had even served time behind bars, but over the months between the fateful wreck that had changed James’s life and his departure from Fairhope, James had grown to rely on Dusty and his bad influence to cope with life as it was then. Through their shared antics, they had grown as close as two small-town rebels could.

  In fact, it was Dusty James had gone to at the end of that fateful summer. Dusty hadn’t hesitated to give James enough money to get him as far away from Fairhope as he could manage on a limited budget. He hadn’t asked questions, either.

  James looked at Dusty and saw the first friendly face of all those ghosts he had left behind. Without a word, he embraced him hard. “It’s good to see you, buddy,” he said, and meant it.

  Dusty thumped him on the shoulder. He stepped back and surveyed the beard and tattoos that covered James and laughed. “The big, wide world’s left its mark on you.”

  “Seems so,” James muttered, turning his tattooed left hand until the art on the underside was revealed. “How’s life been treating you?”

  “Decent enough,” Dusty said with a nod. He glanced over James’s shoulder at the locked garage. “Clint told me he’d heard a rumor you were back in town. As shocked as I was to hear that, it wasn’t anything compared to how I felt when I heard you’re trying to throw together a new business.”