Tangled Up in Daydreams

by Rebecca Bloom

  “These okay?” Lifting out a pair of blue sweats and a faded red T-shirt.

  “Fine.”

  “Do you want to try to clean up a little?”

  “I should.” Looking at the spattered blood on her arms. “Can you help me?”

  “Of course. Sit tight and I will run some water in the bath.”

  Renee went into Molly’s bathroom and ran a tub. Molly could hear every sound amplified. The rush of water, the swirl of a hand, the unfolding of a terry towel. Every quiet sound was a cacophony blaring in Molly’s ear. Even the whir of the air conditioner made the hairs on her legs quiver with attention.

  A few hours later Molly woke up and her hand felt like it had grown into the Super Bowl blimp. It pulsed like a vibrator, only it wasn’t emitting stimulating beats. Molly slowly lifted herself up and tread softly into the bathroom. Her hair was sticking out on the left side and everytime she moved her arm she felt the swelling pain. On the countertop was a bottle of Tylenol. Molly popped two more, peed, and then carefully wrapped herself into a black cashmere cardigan. Her mouth felt like sandpaper after priming a summer deck. All she could think of was orange juice and seeing if there was a chainsaw in the garage to amputate the aching wound. When she got downstairs the living room was overflowing with people. Renee was holding court from the couch with Abby, Lisa, and Corey. They were all in the midst of hilarity when Molly shuffled by and plopped herself on the couch next to Renee.

  “Hi, guys.” Trying to smooth her Medusa mane. “I guess our whole drink plan didn’t work out too well. Sorry.”

  “No worries. We brought the drinks to you,” Lisa answered as she got up and gave Molly a kiss on the cheek. “Margarita?” Tucking a wisp of her black bob behind her ear.

  “Actually, just some juice. I just took some pain pills the doctor gave me and I wouldn’t want to start drooling.”

  “Like senior prank night?” Corey got up to help Lisa and squeezed Molly’s shoulder. “To this day I have never seen anyone puke up so much in so many colors.”

  “Thanks. Nice to see you too.” Winking at Corey. “You were right there next to me, buddy. We both woke up facing the porcelain goddess.”

  “True, true.” Laughing as he walked into the kitchen.

  “How does it feel?” Renee asked, looking at Molly’s wrapped hand.

  “Like I wish I had a phantom limb.”

  “That bad?”

  “Kind of. I’ll survive.” Readjusting. “Abby, where is Scott?”

  “He had to work late.”

  “I haven’t seen you guys in so long. I think since the wedding.”

  “Well, that’s what happens when you move to LA, become fabulous, and start dating a rock star.”

  Renee tossed Abby a look, and Abby blushed with embarrassment. Her head of blond curls tumbled as she tried to recoup.

  “I’m sorry.”

  “It’s fine. I liked the fabulous part.” Smiling at her friend. “Hey, Corey!” Yelling. “Think you could bring some food in here as well? I should probably eat something.”

  “I’ll get it.” Abby got up and pulled down her light blue work shirt. “I brought over some snacks, which now that I think about it was kind of stupid seeing whose house this is.”

  “It’s a good thing. With the big party at the restaurant, there is zero food here. Plus, I never turn down snacks.”

  Abby got up to join the rest of the crew in the kitchen to assemble the poo-poo platter and Molly, feeling the effects of the medicine, tucked herself deeper into the couch.

  “You didn’t say anything about you know what to anyone?” Molly asked Renee.

  “No, of course not. I told your parents that they stitched you up and everything was going to be fine.”

  “Ha!”

  “Molly, just enjoy your friends tonight and we will go from there? Okay?”

  “Okay.” Leaning over and giving Renee a kiss. “Thanks. For this and before. I know you were trying to help and I am here for you too.”

  “Thanks. I feel a little shitty that I laid that on you about Alex.”

  “It does suck to know how absolutely awful my brother can be, but if you have learned to forgive him, which obviously you have seeing how your stomach continues to grow exponentially, then I can’t create my own drama with him. I don’t want to become one of those tsking friends who judge. It just is unfortunate that he lost some of his glow.”

  “I know, but it does slowly come back. New experiences, like our baby, kind of rebuff the surface and make everything shiny again. Maybe that will happen with you and Liam.”

  “Maybe, maybe I am not as forgiving, I don’t know.” Running her good hand over her hair. “By the way, how cute does Corey look? I love his hair longer.” Changing the subject.

  “I know. It almost makes me want to rekindle our torrid tenth-grade affair.”

  “What affair?”

  “You remember. We made out for, like, a week in February before it all got too weird.”

  “No, I do not remember. Are you sure? Because I had a torrid affair with Corey junior year for about a week in March.”

  “That little prick!” Renee laughed. “I bet he made out with Lisa and Abby too.”

  “Perk of being friends with a group of girls.”

  “Did he do that weird tongue twirl?”

  “Yes!” Shrieking with laughter. “Renee, what was that?”

  “To this day I have no idea.” Laughing harder.

  Corey, Lisa, and Abby all returned to the living room carrying trays of beverages and food. They carefully placed everything on the glass coffee table and sat back down.

  “What’s so funny?” Lisa asked as she took a sip of her margarita.

  “Did you ever make out with Corey?” Molly asked.

  “What are you talking about?” Corey blushed ever so slightly.

  “Of course I did.”

  “Me too,” Abby added. “Senior year fall.”

  “Senior prank night before the dueling pukers,” Lisa noted.

  “You slut!” Renee chided.

  “I deny everything!” Blushing more.

  “I can’t believe you made out with all of us,” Abby stated.

  “What guy wouldn’t have?”

  “So you admit it!” Molly shouted

  “Well …” Taking a large swig.

  “Can I just ask one thing?” Lisa interjected. “What the hell was that weird tongue-twisting thing you did?”

  Molly and Renee laughed even louder and harder, their giggles ricocheting around the room like rubber bullets. Soon all of the gang dissolved into the same hysterics and the evening progressed much the same way. At some point, Molly faded into the couch, and Renee and Corey had to help her upstairs. They settled her in her bed, turned out the lights, and left Molly to her dreams.

  Molly woke up feeling hot pink and fleshy. Everything felt tender, like lips stung by a jalapeño. Her mouth was the Sahara and she crawled from the bed, tipped her head under the sink, and drank greedily. She ran some water for a bath and eased herself out of her clothing, being careful not to bump her hand. She slid into the tub and the hot water wrapped around her. Molly held her hand out of the water and looked at her nails. Some were still caked with blood. She took a washcloth and methodically cleaned her cuticles. The cut didn’t hurt as much today—all that was left was a dull ache. Molly was used to dealing with those. Molly placed the washcloth on her head and rewound yesterday’s activities. Talking with her father, Elizabeth, Renee, being at the restaurant, getting the stitches, seeing her friends, and then, the potential disaster awaiting her. It had been too big of a day and Molly felt turned around. She was definitely struggling to find which end was up. Her head was lolling about somewhere by her feet while her toes brushed the ceiling.

  Molly thought about her parents and what this whole saga was doing to them. She could imagine them huddled together in their California King worrying about their only daughter. Wondering what they did to encourage her to g
et mixed up with a guy who lives on an edge not even they saw in their hippie pot-smoking days. Wondering if anything they say or do will push Molly one way or another, wondering if they should speak their minds or hold their tongues. Wishing that their daughter could have found some nice, normal man with a normal job and a less extensive list of problems. Wishing Molly had someone like Renee to come home to, someone who they knew would remain centered and supportive and forgiving in a way they would never fathom. Knowing that there was no way in hell Molly was going to listen to anything anyone says because she never has. Praying that Liam would love her better. Hoping things would get better.

  Molly took a deep breath and went underwater feeling the need to be submerged and held down. She wanted to feel weightless, to feel nothing. She broke the surface and ran her healthy hand over her face to brush the water from her eyes. She stared at the ceiling and counted the tiles. There were twenty-five yellow ones. It was right then that Molly knew she didn’t belong lounging in her childhood any longer. She was too old to be so young. And what if she was pregnant? What if some little thing was growing in her? Then what? What the hell was she going to do? Molly ran her hand over her flattish stomach and looked at her belly button trying to see what was inside. No way. It was just a bug, some sort of flu. She kept her hand there just in case.

  Molly got out of the bath twenty minutes later, her whole body a giant prune. That was one way to tone down the fleshiness she had felt when she woke up. Suck all moisture from her skin. Nice illusion. Molly threw on some black yoga pants and a blue ­T-shirt. She sat down on the floor and folded her legs under her. She reached for the phone and dialed Jay’s number.

  “Did I wake you?”

  “Sort of.” Her voice rolling with sleep. “Hungover and in serious pain.”

  “What did you do last night?”

  “Went out with Elliot and Maggie to some new club in Hollywood. Kind of fun, until Tom came in and started the whiskey train.”

  “You hate whiskey.”

  “Yes, but I love Tom.”

  Tom was a short, built guy with a shaved head and a tribal tattoo on his bicep. He and Jaycee had a yearlong flirtation going that went in circles.

  “And?”

  “And obviously nothing happened because I am talking to you, but somewhere last night I think I rolled my ankle.”

  “Oh, Jay. Do you think you fucked it up again?” Molly, worried.

  “I don’t know. I’m more into complaining about Tom.”

  “Jay.”

  “I’ll go to the doctor tomorrow if it still hurts.”

  About six months earlier, Jay had microscopic surgery on her ankle. Something to do with decaying bones. They pulled some out, put in some tiny pins, and sent her home with crutches and a cast. Molly drove her home from the hospital, trying to avoid any jarring potholes. She half carried Jay into her apartment and settled her on the couch. Molly went to the kitchen to fetch some water.

  “I still don’t quite get why you planned this surgery when your parents were out of town,” Molly called from the kitchen.

  “I didn’t. There was some emergency business thing they had to go to.” Adjusting the pillows. “My mom was going to stay, but I told her I had you.”

  “Thanks.” Handing Jay the glass and opening the bottle of pain pills. “I love playing nursemaid.”

  “I know. Plus, you know how my mom can cluck and I didn’t want her to make a big deal out of this.” Downing a few pills.

  “Jay, it is a big deal. You can barely walk and you won’t be able to drive for a few weeks.” Molly groaned. “I can’t believe I have to deal.”

  “You don’t have to.”

  “Who else will? Such a pain. I’m going to have to change my whole schedule.” Complaining.

  “Look, I’m sorry to put you out!” Whining. “Just leave and I’ll manage. Fuck!”

  “Sure you will.” Molly headed for the door.

  “Where are you going?!” Jay cried. “You can’t leave me alone! You wouldn’t! Please!”

  “You told me you would manage.” Molly eyed her friend and knew she had taken her little joke too far. There was terror all over Jay’s face.

  “Relax, Jay.” Kissing her friend on the head. “I’m just going to get my stuff.” Starting to smile.

  “What?”

  “My stuff to stay here.” Grinning. “You just have no humor today!”

  “Must be the anesthesia.”

  “Had you going there for a minute.”

  “Kind of.” Smiling. “You were being such a bitch.”

  “I would never leave you here all alone. Think of the guilt I would have to endure when they found you, prone on the floor with a head wound, and your nightgown bunched around your waist exposing your Hello Kitty panties.”

  “I don’t own Hello Kitty panties.”

  “Liar!” Molly squealed. “I saw them in your panty drawer.”

  “Stop saying ‘panty,’ I hate that word. And when were you snooping in my drawers?!” Laughing harder.

  “Panty, panty, panty!”

  “Stop!” Jay yelled.

  “Panty, I got your panties!” Molly, singing.

  “Seriously, it hurts to jiggle.”

  “I’m sorry.” Catching her breath. “I feel like I took some of your Vicodin. I’ll be right back.” Molly ran out of the house.

  Molly stayed at Jay’s for a few weeks, constantly shuffling clothes and beads between her and Liam’s pad and Jay’s while tending to her friend. Jay knew it was an inconvenience, but Molly never once complained and indulged in Jay’s every whim. Pizza fests, ice cream for dinner, eighties bad movie marathons, and their very own version of American Idol. But Jay also knew that a repeat performance of Molly as perfect nurse was not going to happen if Jay drank too much whiskey and fell over in stilettos she wasn’t supposed to be wearing. Molly would kill her if she reinjured her ankle.

  “I promise I will go to the doctor. I’m sure it’s fine.”

  “Okay, but you can’t mess around with your foot,” Molly scolded.

  “I know, Mol. Can we change the subject?”

  “Sure. How about this? I had a shit day yesterday.”

  “What happened?” Lighting a cigarette.

  “I thought you quit.”

  “How did you even know?” Jay, wondering.

  “Psychic.”

  “I have allowed myself one a day.”

  “Anyway, I sliced my hand open again and had to get stitches.”

  “Are you okay?” Her voice rising slightly with concern.

  “Yeah, I’m just a big klutz.”

  “Yup. Cute doctor at least?”

  “Yeah, right. That only happens on Friends.”

  “I know.” Sitting up and ashing. “Does it hurt?”

  “A little. I’ll survive.” Molly, picking at the polish on her toes. “I got your package.”

  “And?”

  “Fuck it. Let’s do it.”

  “Really?” Jay chirped.

  “Yeah. My dad thinks it looks great and convinced me to give it a go.”

  “YES!” Jay screamed. “I’m so psyched! This is going to be so cool!”

  “Easy, I think you just blew out my ear.” Laughing. “I’ll be back next week and we can get started.”

  “You are coming home?”

  “It’s where I live.”

  “Good. I’ll call the peeps right now, get the lease going, and tell my parents you are in. Molly, you won’t regret this. It’s going to be awesome.”

  “I know, partner.”

  “I like how that sounds.” Getting even more excited. “I’ll start on our business plan.”

  “What do you think for a name?”

  “I think we should keep Annabelle. It’s cute and already has an identity.”

  “Are you sure that you don’t want something of you in it?” Molly asked.

  “Definitely. When we open our second store for men we can use my middle name.”
/>   “Francesca?”

  “Frankie.”

  “I like it. You’re always three steps ahead.”

  “That’s my job. Okay, I’m so excited and I have to pee.”

  “Go, we’ll talk later. And take care of your foot.”

  “I will. Love you.”

  “Back at you.” Hanging up.

  Molly stood up and stretched. A smile formed across her face. It was the first in a while that seemed to have a mind of its own. Everything that had been burning before now just glowed and her color had mellowed to a dusty pearl. Today was a day of new beginnings. Today she would start afresh.

  ten

  Helen was sitting at the kitchen table reading the paper. Her glasses perched on the end of her slightly crooked nose.

  “Hey, Mom.”

  “Honey, how is the hand?”

  “Feels a little tight and sore, but not so bad.”

  “You were out cold when we got back last night.” Getting up. “Breakfast?”

  “Eggs would be cool.”

  Helen got up and began busying herself.

  “Is everything ready for tonight?” Sitting down.

  “Yeah, Dad was there so late and he left early this morning. I just need to go in and finish setting the tables. The flowers should be getting in about now.”

  “It’s going to be great.”

  “It better. It needs to be perfect. Besides it being a bunch of bigwigs from the Allen Conference, Food & Wine is covering it for the magazine.”

  “Cool.”

  “It’s great for Dad and the restaurant. They are doing photos and the menu for the October issue. Should get us on the map as more of a foodie destination restaurant.”

  “It will. Can I come help? I’m a bit of a gimp, but I can still set silverware and smile.”

  “Of course. We’ll go as soon as you eat. Dad told me Jay sent some pictures of a space. I love that she is so driven.”

  “Yeah, I called her and told her that I’m in. It seems a little insane and fast, but why not, right?”

  “Exactly. I’m proud of you. It’s going to be terrific.” Coming over and kissing Molly’s cheek. “It’s time to start something new.”