The Omega's Finest Baby

by Louise Bourgeois

  “Because we all figure you’re going with him, but now he won’t be here, he won’t be anywhere, so you won’t be . . . I guess I’m trying to say that I’m glad that it’s at least a year before I have to start worrying about losing you.”

  “It won’t be a year. It won’t be ever.” Bill closes his laptop. “I’m always going to be here. I’m not going anywhere.”

  ***

  Desmond opens his mouth to say something to Alex, but stops when there’s an almighty shriek from the kitchen.

  “What the hell was that?”

  “Hey.” Alex reaches over and lightly punches Desmond’s arm. “No swearing in front of the babies.”

  Desmond glances down at Matthew and Elizabeth, who are led on their play mat on the floor in front of them - Elizabeth is too enthralled by chewing on her stuffed toy and Matthew is sleeping. He looks up at Alex and just about resists the urge to roll his eyes.

  “They’re fine - they didn’t hear.”

  “That’s no excuse. I don’t want their first words to be bad ones.”

  “They won’t be talking for months, Alex. Even if they had heard this, they’d probably have forgotten it already so it really doesn’t matter either way.”

  “That . . . I . . . No.” Alex points at Desmond. “No swearing in front of the babies.”

  “Okay. Okay.” Desmond holds his hands up and then leans over to press a kiss to Alex’s forehead. “I promise I’ll behave. Now, come on, princess; let’s see what’s got Daddy Neal so excited.” He picks up Elizabeth and wanders through to the kitchen where he finds Neal hunched over his laptop and muttering excitedly. He walks over and stands just behind Neal. “What’s going on? I swear you just about burst my eardrums.”

  Neal looks up at Desmond and grins. He points towards the screen.

  Desmond leans in slightly, being careful not to jostle Elizabeth too much, and reads what is on Neal’s screen. His frown deepens as he reads through the words and then reads through them again just to be sure.

  “Isn’t that great?”

  Desmond scans through the information again before standing up. He chews on the inside of his lower lip as he thinks carefully about what he’s just read. He’s so caught up in his thoughts, in fact, that he completely misses it when Alex walks into the room, holding Matthew tightly.

  Alex frowns slightly when he sees Desmond and then looks to Neal for some kind of explanation.

  Neal shrugs. He stares worriedly at Desmond for a few seconds before looking back at Alex.

  “Calvin is pregnant.”

  “Oh.”

  “Isn’t that such good news?”

  Alex opens and closes his mouth a few times before speaking.

  “Well, they’ve wanted it for a while now so it’s good they finally get it, but . . .”

  “But what? You can’t think this is a bad thing.” Neal narrows his gaze slightly.

  “No.” Alex shakes his head. “They deserve it.”

  “Then what’s the problem?”

  Alex sighs lightly and shakes his head before walking over and handing Matthew to Neal. He turns towards Desmond and looks down at Elizabeth (she’s still enthralled by her toy and has no idea what else is going on) before putting a hand on Desmond’s shoulder.

  “Are you okay?”

  Desmond snaps himself out of his daze and looks at Alex. He hesitates for a few seconds before replying.

  “Like you said, they deserve it. I just thought that when it happened, I could be a lot happier for them than this. I thought everything would be good and I’d be able to celebrate with my best friend, but it’s not all good. I don’t know if any of it is good.”

  “They’re having a baby,” Neal mutters. “It doesn’t matter how angry you are with him, you should be happy for them getting this. I’m sending them flowers,” he turns back towards his laptop, “and they’ll be from all of us.”

  Desmond smiles fondly at Neal and then looks at Alex.

  “I just wish it was easier than this. I miss him and I wish we could still share everything, but it’s different now.”

  “Are you mad at him?”

  “I . . . I’m not mad at any of them, not really, but it’s all changed now and I just don’t know how to . . . act with them now, not even my best friend. It’s . . . something like that."

  “It’s okay.” Alex smiles softly. “You still care and I’m sure you’ll fix it soon.”

  Desmond opens his mouth to reply, but Neal interrupts them.

  “I don’t mean to disturb you, but,” Neal turns around in his seat, “do you think five bunches of flowers is too many?”

  ***

  “Why didn’t he tell me?” Brandon chews on his nails as he stares at the computer screen. “Do you think he hates me?”

  David stands back in the doorway to the office and just stares at Brandon for a minute before slowly shaking his head.

  “Idiot,” David mutters and takes a few steps forward.

  “What?” Brandon turns around and looks at David. “Why would you say that?”

  “He probably didn’t tell you he was pregnant for the same reason you weren’t going to tell him you were.” David walks over and puts a hand on Brandon’s shoulder. “He didn’t want to make you sad.”

  “He’s my best friend and he’s finally getting something he’s wanted so badly. Why would I be sad?”

  “Because he’s having a baby after we just decided not to have ours, after we spent so long worrying about it, after we went through hell making that decision and actually going through with it. I guess he didn’t want to make you think about that again so soon.”

  Brandon sighs lightly and looks down.

  “I’m not . . . It’s different to what I was going to do, though.”

  “Why?”

  “Because if he hadn’t overheard then I would never have told him, he would never have known; he would never have had to feel sad about it or even just think about it. He’s . . . Even though he didn’t tell me about this, I’ve still found out. I still have to think about . . . I still feel . . . I still might get sad. I might have gotten sad, even if he’d told me himself, but now I have that on top of feeling like maybe he doesn’t care enough about me, which is bad after he’s been so great about being there for me through this whole thing.”

  David takes a few seconds to try and process exactly what Brandon has just said. He shakes his head and kneels down in front of Brandon.

  “He’s probably crazy, just like you were when you weren’t going to tell him about what we went through. Like you said, he’s your best friend and he’s happy - I know you’ll make that the most important thing, regardless of what else you might potentially feel.”

  “But he . . .”

  “Call him.” David takes his phone out of his pocket and holds it out towards Brandon. “I’m sure he’ll tell you the same thing.”

  Brandon takes the phone from David and just clutches it tightly for a few seconds.

  “What if he . . .”

  “No. Call him.” David squeezes Brandon’s hand tightly for a second. “You’re probably both going to cry because that’s what you do now, but it’s going to be okay. One thing I am absolutely sure has never changed is how important you two are to each other so call him and have him tell you that for himself.”

  ***

  “Should I call him? I think I should call him.” Mark reaches out towards his phone, but then draws his hand back again. “No, I shouldn’t; he hates me now.”

  “Oh, my god.” Tomas throws his head back and groans loudly - he’s had to hear Mark complaining about this for what feels like forever now. “Call him.”

  “You think?” Mark chews on his lower lip and frowns slightly. “Even though he hates me?”

  “He doesn’t . . .”

  “Yes, he does. He doesn’t speak to me that much anymore - he hates me because I left even though I bet he won’t hate Bill for staying and . . .”

  “Mark!”


  Mark’s eyes widen slightly and he stares at Tomas.

  “What?”

  “For the love of god, shut up and call him. He does not hate you. If you want to start talking to him more, you could reach out too. Even if it doesn’t start now, you obviously still care about him and he’s got something good right now so you should call him to say ‘congratulations’ at least.”

  “You really think so?”

  “Mark, just pick up the damn phone.”

  “Okay.”

  ***

  “That’s bullshit.” Charlie bangs his hand on the desk.

  Dave glances over at Charlie, but soon turns away and shakes his head - he really doesn’t want to have to deal with . . .

  “It’s fucking ridiculous.”

  Dave sighs heavily - of course he wasn’t going to get away with not hearing about any of this. He closes his eyes and tries to hope that Charlie just needs to rant and doesn’t want to involve him in this conversation in any way.

  “Are you even listening to me?”

  Dave makes some kind of non-committal sound to show that he’s listening, but he still doesn’t want to have to actually talk about this.

  “Then you have to think this is bullshit. I mean, he was the worst of us.”

  Dave puts a hand over his face and tries to tune out Charlie’s insane ranting, but it doesn’t work and he hears everything loud and clear.

  “It’s not like he’s fucking crazy enough to think that he did nothing wrong like Desmond. He cheated and lied like the rest of us. He stayed for all those years, doing all that wrong, for some shitty little reason. He says he went through hell, but he still did it for all that time and I know he’d do it again for his... He wouldn’t have said a fucking word about any of it. He’s a fucking liar and fraud, that’s what he is.”

  “None of us would,” Dave mutters.

  “Bullshit. He would have lied forever; we would never have done that. He’d do the same thing over and over again even now, even after he knows the hell it’s caused. Fucking . . . He got nothing bad out of this and now he gets to have a fucking baby. What do we get? A hell of a lot less results and having to live in fear every day that we’re going to lose our jobs over this.”

  “I’m not afraid.”

  “Maybe you should be.”

  “Why?”

  “Because we could lose it all - everything we’ve ever gotten and more - because of some stupid decisions we were forced into when we were kids.”

  “Now, you’re talking bullshit.”

  “How . . .”

  “No.” Dave points at Charlie. “You made those decisions, the same as me, the same as George, the same as Lee, the same as Mike, the same as everyone else. Yeah, it was stupid and, yeah, we shouldn’t have done it, but you cannot blame it on youth. You made those decisions - take some fucking responsibility for your actions.”

  “How the fu . . .”

  “Don’t you dare.” Dave stands up. “You did wrong. We did wrong. We deserve every last little bad thing that is coming to us. George was your friend once; he was my friend too and I hope he still is. Don’t take it out on him because he decided to do things differently to you in the end. You knew everything he did, all along, and you have no right to only get pissed at him now. He stood by his best friend all those years and maybe he was an idiot for it, but I know you and I know you would do the same damn thing given the chance.”

  “He’s getting away with it.”

  “You fucking idiot.” Dave shakes his head. “We all got caught - none of us are getting away with it - and every single person who looked up to him, which is basically everyone I have ever met, is looking down on him now. Tell me he’s coming out of this with something good.”

  “He’s got the man he loves.”

  “You’ve got me.”

  “They’re having a baby.”

  “We could do that. I don’t relish the idea, but it’s not impossible.”

  “He . . . I . . . Damn it!” Charlie bangs his fist down on the desk.

  “You are so wrong about all of this, Charlie, and I cannot listen to it anymore so I’m leaving. Call me when you’re done being pissed.”

  ***

  Dave hangs up the phone and seriously considers throwing it against the wall - this isn’t his responsibility anymore. Yes, he might still technically be Calvin’s boss on an international scale and until the very end of the year, but with no more big projects on his schedule and none at all for at least the next year, he shouldn’t have to answer questions about Calvin’s decisions anymore, but here he is, having at least seven conversations in the last twenty minutes about Calvin’s news. He groans loudly when his phone starts ringing again - he really doesn’t get paid enough for this.

  ***

  Franc rests his chin on the top of Tim’s head as he quickly reads through the information on the computer screen again. He smiles fondly and glances down at Tim.

  “Maybe you still have another year as the head of the department in you.”

  “Please.” Tim rolls his eyes and closes down the computer. He turns around to face Franc. “I’m done with all of that now.”

  Franc raises an eyebrow, but chooses not to comment - he’s heard Tim make claims like that before and then go back to work with undying enthusiasm the next day. He shakes his head and presses a kiss to Tim’s forehead.

  “What do you think, though?”

  “About them having a baby?” Tim shrugs lightly. “Good luck to them. It’ll be hard, but when has that ever stopped Calvin especially from doing anything? Besides, if you want something and you can have it and you’re going to give everything for it, like we’ve all heard they will, then you should get it. It shouldn’t be any different for them.”

  Franc smiles fondly and touches a hand to Tim’s cheek.

  “Besides, it’s probably going to be an epic baby and epic babies should always exist.”

  Franc can’t stop himself from laughing.

  “You think their baby will be epic?”

  “It’ll have all the good genes - of course it’ll be epic. Not as epic as our baby will be, but . . .”

  “What?”

  Tim winces and puts his hands over his ears.

  “I think you broke my head.” Tim slowly lowers his hands. “What are you doing?”

  “What am I doing? What are you doing?” Franc puts his hands on his hips and takes a few deep breaths. “You can’t just say something like we’re having a baby and expect me to just say nothing about it.”

  “I always thought it was something we’d do eventually.”

  “Eventually, but not right now. Right now is . . .”

  “Why would you think it was happening now?”

  “Because you said our baby ‘will be’ like it’s already . . . So it’s not happening now?” Franc stares at Tim.

  “No, it’s not happening now, unless you’ve got something to tell me.”

  “No, I don’t have anything to tell you. Why would you think I did?”

  “I think you need to relax.” Tim reaches out to lightly squeeze Franc’s arm. “Maybe you should sit down.”

  Franc frowns slightly and looks around the room, but can’t see any seats close by so he sits down on the floor instead. He puts his hands on his knees and concentrates on breathing deeply.

  Tim just watches Franc for a few minutes before speaking again.

  “If it’s not something you really want, then we can talk about it - it doesn’t have to mean the end of anything.”

  “I . . .” Franc looks at the floor for a few seconds before looking up at Tim. “It wasn’t something I thought we’d even talk about yet and now you’re saying it definitely will happen? It’s a big thing and I wasn’t ready to think about it or to talk about it.”

  “Then let’s not talk about it. We’re not that old yet; we’ve got time. It might be a few more years before it happens - it doesn’t have to be a big deal now.”

  Franc stares at Tim f
or a minute.

  “Really?”

  “Unless you’re going to tell me that this is never going to happen, then we don’t need to talk about it again until you’re ready."

  Franc is quiet for a few minutes before nodding slowly.

  “Okay. Okay, let’s not talk about it now.”

  Tim smiles. He’s going to say something else, but he doesn’t get the chance before Franc is speaking again.

  “But if you wanted to start practicing now, for making those babies, then I’d like that.”

  ***

  Benjamin reads through all the information on the screen in front of him and slowly shakes his head. This is exactly the kind of thing he’s come to expect from Calvin over the years. He is happy - Calvin is his friend, after all, and he has wanted this for a while - but he’s already starting to think about how much he’s going to have to deal with this, with all of Calvin’s drama, and, while he doesn’t mind having to do that again, he’s beyond relief that at least he’s had a year off from dealing with it.

  ***

  “Dude.” Chrys smacks Lee on the arm and points at the computer. “Do you see this?”

  “Yes, Chrys, I can read.”

  Chrys glances at Lee through the corner of his eye and then shakes his head. He looks back at the computer screen.

  “Maybe we should send something.”

  “You already called. Why do we need to send something?”

  “Because they are our friends and they are having a baby - it’s the nice thing to do. If anyone else we know has a baby, though, we’ll go bankrupt sending all these gifts.”

  “This makes five people we know who have had babies recently or will be and it’s two relationships so . . .”

  “Yeah, but it’s three babies, and if Calvin and George have twins too, it’ll be four. And if you count Max and Ollison, too, then . . .”

  “No.” Lee points at Chrys. “No gifts. You can save that for when the baby’s born.”

  “You’re being mean today. What is your problem?”

  “Why is this such a big deal to you?”

  “I’m trying to be nice. That’s what you do when your friends are having a baby.” Chrys just about resists the urge to roll his eyes.

  “Friends? We barely know them.”

  “What?” Chrys shakes his head. “We’ve both known George for . . . for so long that I can barely remember anymore.”