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Planet Lolita

Page 15

by Charles Foran


  20—-12-21 8:59 pm

  Me (to her first, him second): Thai Airways Flight 321, departure HK 10:30 am, December 22. Airport arrival time: 9 am. Travel time to Chep Lap Kok: 30 minutes. Meet you at elevator: 8:30. PS: Manga okay. We peed together in the sink

  “Oh my God,” Mom said when she saw my hair.

  “Well, well,” Dad said.

  “Greetings, parentals,” I said. On the countertop I deposited my laptop and phone, for confiscation.

  “Who did that to you?” she said.

  “Manga, I bet,” he said quickly.

  “I’m a homeless Thai boy who stole an amah’s baseball cap,” I said, adjusting the visor. The cap read JESUS TALKS PILIPINO instead of TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS. “It’s the perfect disguise.”

  Dad held out a toasted English muffin. “Hungry?”

  “A little.”

  Mom sighed. She dangled a SARS mask before my face like a dead rat being held by its tail. “The driver won’t take you—won’t take any of us—if we aren’t wearing these.”

  “What about my breakfast?”

  “Eat fast.”

  In the car, I said one thing only from behind the gauze. “Now I’m an evil sock puppet too.”

  “You won’t have to wear it for long,” Dad said.

  At the airport I said one thing only as well. “What if you need to reach me in Bangkok?”

  “I’ll call the hotel,” Mom answered.

  “I didn’t bring my phone either,” he said. “We’ll pick up China knock-offs with local numbers, to keep in touch.”

  “Not that you’ll be apart,” she said to him. “Day or night. Even for a second. Correct, Jacob?”

  “Correct.”

  “I want a Hello Kitty keychain with mine,” I said.

  In the dying moments of our Hong Kong life I removed my sunglasses for a final look at the Kwok-MacInnes parental team. They weren’t talking, or touching, or acknowledging any shared concerns. And really, what could such an unlikely pair have in common? Not a time zone or continent. Nor a language or dialect. Certainly not their genderless offspring. Given her mongrel looks, she’d most likely been adopted, perhaps from the Mother Ginger shelter in On Klang, Thailand. Now, defeated by her vicious tendencies and XXX thoughts, and with their own plans in flux—a dog could be kennelled far more easily than a daughter—they were giving her back.

  “We’re a super-cute mixed family,” I said. “A magazine photo shoot.”

  They both stared.

  “We’re the future. Everyone envies us!”

  Her hug dissolved into sobs and quivering limbs and, by the weight abruptly forced upon me, near collapse. “This is it, Sarah,” she whispered through her SARS protection.

  “Your biggest mistake?”

  I felt her nod.

  “I didn’t mean to,” I said for her only.

  “What?”

  “Get epilepsy. I didn’t mean to.”

  She choked.

  Don’t send me back! I added to myself. “It’s a tsunami, Dad,” I said to him. “It just is.”

  “Better make our way to the gate,” he replied.

  PART II

  The Big Mango

  News > Local News

  HK RESIDENT DETAINED AT AIRPORT

  Published: 22/12/20— at 16:52

  Online news: Breaking story, 57 minutes ago

  Police at Suvarnabhumi Airport detained a 47-year-old Hong Kong resident and Canadian national for questioning after an incident at passport control.

  Kwok Ka-Shing, arriving from Hong Kong with his 15-year-old daughter who cannot be named under Thai law, was held for more than two hours after first refusing to submit to a medical examination for SARS, and then turning belligerent.

  Informed by immigration officers that he required a letter from the girl’s mother to enter Thailand, Mr. Kwok invited authorities to call a number in Hong Kong belonging, he claimed, to his wife. When officials were able only to leave a message with an unidentified woman, he was detained for further questioning.

  Mr. Kwok, described as agitated and possibly intoxicated, mistook the question for an accusation that he had been lying about the relationship, and had other motives for travelling with a young female described by one witness as “unusually pretty.”

  On being corrected—immigration officials deny Mr. Kwok’s allegation that he was physically assaulted—he pleaded the obvious resemblances between himself and the girl, whom he called “90 percent mine.” The youth said she would text or FaceTime her mother to confirm her status, except that neither she nor her father had a phone or computer in their possession.

  Kwok Ka-Shing was admitted into Thailand after agreeing not to make a formal complaint, and to submit to a check by police within 48 hours. He provided the name of a five-star Bangkok hotel.

  Senior Officer Aroon Pradchaphet, head of airport security, issued a statement: “Contrary to perceptions, Thailand is not an open port for sexual predators or human traffickers. A policy of vigilance must be maintained, especially with regards to children.” Sex with any prostitute under the age of 18 is prohibited.

  Asianbootycall.com recently ranked Thailand the top destination for sex tourism for the seventh straight year. Bangkok districts Patpong, Soi Cowboy, and Nana, along with the coastal town of Pattaya, are prime red-light areas. For four years running, the upmarket magazine Travel&Relax has also named Bangkok the “world’s best city.”

  Your comments:

  Viewfromkhaosan

  22/12/20— at 16:53

  Don’t believe the cops or tourism spin. This country is a brothel, and welcome to it, Kwok Ka-Shing and your unusually pretty daughter! She’ll be raw meat for the ravenous.

  14 people liked / 61 people disliked this comment

  redmeatboy

  22/12/20— at 16:54

  Guess that’s my cue. Old enough to bleed, old enough to need. And to put out, and shut up about it. Hope she’s worth the bother, dude. 203 people liked / 13 people disliked this comment

  warriorqueen

  22/12/20— at 16:57

  Discuss: assholes like redmeatboy have small dicks and no brains. But yes, juicy girls and ladyboys are Thailand’s top tourist attractions.

  11 people liked / 109 people disliked this comment

  redmeatboy

  24/12/20— at 16:58

  Want to suck on it anyway, WQ? Bet you do.

  45 people liked / 2 people disliked this comment

  pussyhound

  22/12/20— at 17:04

  This comment has been removed from the server.

  Sis

  MESSAGES EDIT

  20—-12-22 3:50 PM

  Check out the creeper with his … girl? At the reception.

  He’s cute! For an old guy, lolz

  She’s hot too, but a little young?

  SOOO jealous of these skinny

  Asian hoes

  Shut up, you’re not even fat.

  I got thunder thighs!

  Haha okay, but what’s he saying? You’re closer.

  “I am no longer with her mother.” Ew wait, he’s her dad!

  Why is manager lady being such a bitch?

  Oh no, stop staring …

  Shit! The chick totally saw us! Don’t look!

  Gotcha. I can still hear though! Hotel wants them to take two rooms. Dragon manager said “Your daughter will be more comfortable.”

  Gross! Maybe he is perv!

  Wait … she wants one room only … weird, she seems so stressed, I want to know more!

  OMG, did she just wave at me?

  No way!

  Don’t look up! Pretend you’re texting!

  I’m freaked!

  Lol, I AM texting!

  True lmao

  TEXT MESSAGE SEND

  Tweets

  Jules Critchly @honkersandmash 20h

  Waiting out the rain in B-kok with the crop-haired teen dream curled up in the windowsill across the way

  Expand Reply Retwe
et Favorite More

  Jules Critchly @honkersandmash 20h

  She sits and sits, watching the Chao Phraya below, tears on the windowpane. Must be sadly

  Expand Reply Retweet Favorite More

  Craig Naylor @londoncalling288 19h

  @honkersandmash Is she a Siamese cat in five-star incarceration?

  Retweeted by Jules Critchly

  Expand Reply Retweet Favorite More

  Jules Critchly @honkersandmash 19h

  @londoncalling288 She’s a prisoner of the rain, and maybe of someone I can’t see, beyond the window

  Retweeted by Craig Naylor

  Expand Reply Retweet Favorite More

  Craig Naylor @londoncalling288 19h

  @honkersandmash One night in Bangkok will make a teen dream crumble …?

  Retweeted by Jules Critchly

  Expand Reply Retweet Favorite More

  Jules Critchly @honkersandmash 18h

  @londoncalling288 Lost her to the sinister dark and afraid for the sill being empty come morning

  Expand Reply Retweet Favorite More

  www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kdgt1ZHkvn8

  Welcome to Bangkok, City of Creeps and Beggars

  krautwithcellphone . 53 videos

  991 views

  4 likes, 0 dislikes

  Published on Dec 22, 20—

  My cab stops at hotel security gate and this homeless girl knocks on window, asks for ten American dollars. Ten baht maybe! Nice garbage bag for poncho! Cab pulls up out front of lobby and this pair—aging pretty boy with underage fuck-fuck—slide into back seat before I even step out. The look he gives me! Too bad—the camera captures all.

  Please subscribe, comment, like and favourite. Support me and i will make more great videos.

  Follow me on: Google+

  https://plus.google.com/117212072906036286362

  Facebook+

  http://www.facebook.com/helmut.rikker.helmutrikker6393 videos

  All Comments (3)

  Meowmeow 18 minutes ago

  PYT, I agree—but check out the terror in fuck-fuck’s eyes! Where was Big Daddy taking her, I wonder?

  Danukh 23 minutes ago

  See how security guard shoo that girl away, like she is wild dog? She is probably Klong Toey street kid, no parents or home. Thai men who are animals.

  Getrealquick 29 minutes ago

  Great videos? I think not. Kraut, please use your phone for the only thing it’s good for—to stop up your gob.

  www.facebook.com/davidwu11867

  David Wu

  Monday December 22

  via mobile

  [PHOTO]

  SARS refugee, and sprog of Cool Kwok, iPod chilling on lilychan couch. (don’t tell her I snapped her; am told she is moody teen!)

  9:54 pm

  Tag Photo . Add Location . Edit

  Like. Comment. Stop Notifications. Share. Edit

  Lily Chan, Mint Wattana, Gun Boonliang, JR Chu, and 27 others like this.

  Mint Wattana

  poor child misses her mother and sister. Talk to her, grown-ups!

  Mon at 10:10 pm . Like

  Lily Chan

  wah, such an ice Queen Jacob married. All over now

  Mon at 10:12 pm . Like

  Gun Boonliang

  you want i should put my Pancake in taxi and bring her here? She is also moody teen, and can keep sprog company

  Mon at 10:18 pm . Like

  Mint Wattana

  i ask Jacob. Weird, him leaving iPhone back in Fragrant Harbour

  Mon at 10:21 pm . Like

  Lily Chan

  terrible what happened at airport—5th degree!

  Mon at 10:24 pm . Like

  JR Chu

  hotel manager no friendlier

  Mon at 10:24 pm . Like

  Gun Boonliang

  everybody know—sneak young sexstar into five-star, with cameras and security? No chance

  Mon at 10:25 pm . Like

  Mint Wattana

  bad baby boys

  Mon at 10:26 pm . Like

  David Wu

  we shouldn’t jaw about Jacob behind his back. Should not even be Facebook chatting—can just talk instead!

  Mon at 10:28 pm . Like

  JR Chu

  Facebook more fun. Say things can’t say to ACTUAL face!

  Mon at 10:28 pm . Like

  Mint Wattana

  she has perfect face, sprog of Kwok

  Mon at 10:29 pm . Like

  JR Chu

  problemo there, such a PYT … MAJOR …

  Mon at 10:30 pm . Like

  Lily Chan

  any of you meet his soon-to-be-ex? Bitch on wheels

  Mon at 10:31 pm . Like

  Gun Boonliang

  got your eye on Cool Kwok, Lily? Rebound, anyone?

  Mon at 10:32 pm . Like

  David Wu

  friends and party animals—NO MORE behind back chat! Jacob can read this later … and NO chinglish chatroom lol! We grown-ups now

  Mon at 10:33 pm . Like

  Aroon Mookjai

  pepsi here. Party at Lily’s B-kok pad, and I not invited? Someone mention pussycat on couch???

  Tue at 00:14 am . Like

  Mint Wattana

  No invite to creepshits, Pepsi. Sorry

  Tue at 00:15 am . Like

  JR Chu

  I know we not supposed to chat, but Little Kwok needs someone. Her daddy is proper fucked up!

  Tue at 00:16 am . Like

  Aroon Mookjai

  cool Kwok proper fucked up, and I not around to share? What, my drugs not good nuff?

  Tue at 00:17 am . Like

  Gun Boonliang

  poor man letting off steam. Leave him be. And Aroon—you still out there?

  Tue at 00:18 am . Like

  Mint Wattana

  two in morning, bad baby boys—time for bed. And someone tell Jacob to take his poor daughter home to hotel!

  Tue at 2:14 am . Like

  www.facebook.com/davidwu11867

  David Wu

  Tuesday December 23

  via mobile

  [PHOTO]

  At last, she rests! An angel, asleep on a couch (don’t tell her about this photo either!)

  2:18 am

  Tag Photo . Add Location . Edit

  Like. Comment. Stop Notifications. Share. Edit

  Aroon Mookjai, Gun Boonliang, Mint Wattana, and 20 others like this.

  Tweets

  Jules Critchly @honkersandmash 3h

  Jet-lagged in B-Kok rain rain rain. Only the river and the Siamese teen never sleep. Her room light just went on! Come to window lonely girl

  Expand Reply Retweet Favorite More

  Hotel Excelsior, Bangkok

  From: Assistant manager

  To: Kwok Ka-Shing, room 1214

  cc: Kiet Suttikul, chief of security

  Sent: December 23, 20—, 1:18 pm

  re: Disturbance in corridor

  Dear Honoured Guest!

  Thank you for patronage of Hotel Excelsior. We esteem and welcome you to Bangkok treasure by the Chao Phraya.

  Earlier this a.m. a guest staying on floor 12 reported a teenage girl in corridor. This girl, who we identified as Kwok Xixi, also registered to room 1214, spent long period outside room, lying on back listening to iPod. Other guest, worried there was problem with lock, called the front desk. Maid on duty confirmed 1214 door was open, but girl wished to stay in the hallway, better not to wake up her father. She also made somersaults in public space.

  If there is problem with the room, please inform. Room 1214 has two queen beds, as requested. May we suggest you permit daughter to use hotel pool and fitness facility? Both are supervised, and Hotel Excelsior has security cameras in all restaurants and bars, hallways, and elevators. If she stay inside the hotel, she can be safe.

  Thank you!

  Ms. Isra Wongsawat, assistant manager

  WATER TAXI, CHAO PHRAYA

  Audio track of iPhone video, made at 15:4
9, 23/12/20—Hey Mish! Cruising the mighty Chao Phraya on another Irish day in Bangkok, all damp and drizzly and pint-slurping gloomy … Ever seen water so shite brown? Wait, I’ll give you a closer look … (shouts) What was it Gogarty said after swimming the Liffey to avoid the Brits—“I was just going through the motions”? … Shite ‘n’ onions! I got spray on the screen … wait, let me clean it off … (whispers) Christ, listen to the chatter behind me between this one with the afternoon-after tremblies and his wee Thai girl …

  Him: I’m worn right out, kiddo. And feeling blue. But we’re out here now, aren’t we, cruising for those monks?

  Her: The maid got angry with me … (inaudible)

  Him: Maybe I had too much to drink … (inaudible) My friends all like you. Mint wants to take you shopping.

  (whispering) Mish, hold on, let me shift in my seat … I want to give you a look at them, but not get caught out …

  Her: She’s a peppermint!

  Him: Huh? She does smell nice.

  Her: Mint said Lily has her eyes all over you … I need to talk to Rachel. I’m worried about her.

  Him: Worried? Okay. Maybe tomorrow we can find a—Look! On that dock … How many legs does that dog have? (whispering) Looks to me to have just three pegs …

  Him: Dude!

  (whispers) Shite again!

  Him: Mind keeping your phone camera, and your thoughts, to yourself?

  Her: It’s okay, Dad.

  (whispers) I didn’t figure her for his kid …

  Me: Sorry, just sending a video home to my girl in Dublin …

  Him: Even so.

  Me: But that dog has only three legs. And is wearing an eye patch, and a creepy grin. How’d you know it would be on the dock?

  Her: I’m pretty sure God is only half-watching us right now. Which is probably for the best.

  Him: What? Why? … Look, just point your phone elsewhere, okay?

  Me: Sorry.

  (whispers) Mish, best that I send this before I start a row and one of us ends going through the motions. Wait, we’re coming to the dock now … Check out the hopalong pirate pooch … (voice even lower) And God is only half-watching us! You heard it first here. Cheers, Liam

  Liam Moran 16:11

  To Michelle at Mish44208@global.net

  www.shebuddhawithin.blogspot.com

  Guanyin in Bangkok

  Blog: Shebuddhawithin—23 December 20—

  By: RosemarieE

  Wat Pho visit

  How else to pass another dreary day except by courting a chill among the female Buddhas of Bangkok? Am I glad I did. The sage monk Wunsen may believe that Steve Jobs has been reincarnated as a divine being—for a laugh, check out monkwunsen.net—but I came upon my own living deity at Wat Pho, and she was more inspirational than any overhyped gadget man. With the rain a waterfall and the air carbonated grey, I had the great temple by the Chao Phraya pretty much to myself. I’d heard Guanyin resided at Wat Pho, one of a handful of statues to the goddess in non-Chinese temples around the capital, and wasn’t surprised to find her outdoors, unprotected—unlike her presumed-to-be-male counterparts—by pagoda roofs. (A good thing the great reclining Buddha stayed indoors; he’d have drowned by now.) Sure enough, away from the soaring pagodas and conical stupas was a garden of lesser stone deities. Amidst the pop-eyed dragons and Hanumans, along with an amusing statue depicting the pain-pleasure of traditional Thai massage, was a row of serene Guanyins, many covered by worshippers in flakes of gold leaf and garlanded in white beads. The flakes, plus the exposure to pounding sunlight or biblical rains, had left the lady I found most compelling in a bedraggled state that made her dignity and mystery all the more apparent. There she stood, near life-sized on her pedestal—no fearsome Chinese dragon beneath this godhead—one arm across her waist but the other raised, fingers crooked instructively. (The vitarka mudr?, symbolizing the energy of teaching.) More beads dangled off the raised hand and a bouquet of yellow flowers nestled atop the other.

 

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