Clarity: A Young Adult Paranormal Vampire Romance (Blood Haze Book 4)

by Tara Shuler

  “Don’t worry, we’ll find something,” Liam said, and I felt his hand squeezing the back of my neck briefly.

  “I know,” I muttered, my voice muted by the book. But I was just saying what I thought he wanted to hear. I was truly worried.

  “Dmitri’s a bigger threat than these wolves, Alice,” Kai interjected.

  “Oh, god,” I groaned.

  “You idiot,” Liam growled at Kai.

  “Sorry, I just meant…” Kai started to say.

  “Just shush!” Liam snapped.

  “We’re all gonna die,” I moaned.

  “Oh, good grief, Alice,” Liam said. “We’re not going to die. We’ll be fine. Stop catastrophizing.”

  “I’m not!” I said, jerking my head up to glare at him. “I’m being realistic. I can’t use my abilities, our numbers are limited at the moment… I’m just trying to be real.”

  “Snap out of this!” Liam said, grabbing my shoulders and shaking me until my teeth rattled. “You have got to get your emotions in check. We need you to be strong!”

  My stomach was knotted and I felt like I might hurl, but he was right. I had to gain control of my emotions, and fast. I was Chancellor of the Council. There were lives at stake, including those of my friends and family.

  “Ugh, get a grip, Alice,” I told myself, smacking the heel of my hand against my forehead.

  Liam still had a grip on my shoulders, and he squeezed them firmly until I looked into his eyes. He caught my gaze and refused to let me look away.

  “Now you listen to me, Alice,” Liam said. “And you listen good. You are the strongest woman I have ever met in my life. The only reason you think you’re not is because of your own fear. Let… it… go. Right here. Right now. Let that fear go and be the strong woman I see every time I look at you. Let it go!”

  I allowed myself in that moment ten seconds to feel fear, and I promised myself from that moment on I would do whatever it took to quell it once and for all. I was so done with being afraid. I was ready to stand up and face it.

  “Four… three… two… one,” I counted down the last four numbers aloud. “Done. No more fear.”

  I lifted my chin high and took a deep breath. Liam smiled proudly and said, “Don’t you feel better?”

  “No,” I said, and I dissolved into laughter, which Liam quickly followed me in. Kai soon joined in, and we were still laughing when my brother entered the room.

  “What’s so funny?” Will asked.

  “I’m not afraid!” I said, tears of mirth rolling down my cheeks.

  “Ooooooooo-k,” Will drawled. “And why is that funny?”

  “Never mind,” I said, snorting as I tried to stop my laughter. “It’s too stupid to explain.”

  Will shrugged and sat down, saying, “So what are we researching?”

  “Actually,” I said, taking a deep breath to contain my fit of glee, “I already found it. But you’re not going to like it.”

  “Why not?” Will asked.

  “Ok, so… I guess you know that Jamie is trying to learn to mix potions,” I said.

  “Yeah…”

  “Well, I found a potion called Wolf’s Bane that would practically assure us victory against Carson’s pack,” I told him.

  “And?”

  “And it’s only mixable by someone who’s highly experienced with potion making,” I said. “And if Jamie attempts it, she could die just from the fumes if she makes a mistake.”

  Will’s face drained of color, and he said, “You can’t tell her about it.”

  “I know,” I said. “Because she won’t worry about the danger it puts her in. She’ll put everyone else first and she will attempt it.”

  “Don’t tell her, Alice,” he said. “Please don’t.”

  “I’m not going to,” I promised. “Alexi is on the phone trying to find a master potion maker who might be able to help.”

  Will sighed with relief and said, “She mustn’t find out. Ever.”

  I nodded and said, “Will, I agree completely. I’m not going to tell her.”

  “So there’s nothing else to do?” he asked. “You’re saying there’s no need to keep looking?”

  “You can keep looking if you want,” I shrugged. “But we’ve all been reading these books all afternoon and that’s all we’ve come up with.”

  “Well, I’ll keep checking through them for a while,” Will said. “It’ll make me feel like I’m doing something useful, and you never know, I might find something.”

  “I need a break away,” I told him. “You’re welcome to keep looking, but my eyes are so tired the words have been blurring together for quite a while.”

  “No problem,” Will said. “You go take a break and I’ll let you know if I find anything.”

  “I’ll stay and keep looking, too,” Kai said.

  “Why don’t we go have dinner?” Liam suggested.

  “I’m not particularly hungry,” I said. “Maybe just a quick snack.”

  “Alright, then what?” Liam asked.

  “I think I’ll just go to bed after that,” I answered. “I’m exhausted.”

  “I’m pretty tired, too,” Liam said. “Let’s grab that snack and then turn in. Maybe Alexi will be done with his calls by then.”

  We headed to the dining hall, leaving Kai and Will to continue the research, and I asked the cooks for a quick bowl of soup. Fortunately they had a pot of tomato basil soup made from earlier in the day, and it was still simmering. Liam decided to have the same.

  As we quickly slurped down the steaming soup, which I couldn’t help but think would have been much tastier if Jamie had made it, we were silent. I think our brains were just too fried from hours of research to do much else.

  We cleared away our dishes and climbed the stairs. Alexi was just coming down, and since I was staring at my feet I nearly ran into him.

  “Are you headed to bed?” he asked me.

  “Yeah, I think I need sleep,” I answered.

  “I will also retire,” he said. “I was just coming to tell you that I had no luck.”

  “Damn,” I muttered. “Well, maybe you’ll have better luck tomorrow. Night, Liam.”

  “Night you two,” Liam said.

  “Goodnight, brother,” Alexi said.

  I took a quick shower and changed into my most comfortable pajamas before slipping under the covers and into Alexi’s waiting arms. They closed around me in a protective cage and made me feel like everything would be alright, even though I was mostly convinced otherwise. At least it helped ease me gently into sleep.

  Chapter Ten

  The next morning, after breakfast, a delicious egg white omelet with spinach, mushrooms and tomatoes concocted by Jamie, she pulled me aside and said, “Can I show you something?”

  “Of course,” I told her.

  “I don’t want anyone else to see,” she whispered, peering around.

  “Alexi, I’m going to step into the kitchen with Jamie for a minute,” I said.

  He looked rather concerned, but nodded his reluctant approval.

  I followed Jamie into the kitchen where she held a small glass flask in her hand. She said, “Watch this.” She knocked the flask back and took a large swig, swallowing the amber liquid. Moments later, her hair turned the same color as the liquid.

  “Wow!” I gasped. “You made this?”

  “It’s not much, but it worked, and I’m not dead,” she told me.

  She picked up another potion that was hazy and translucent, nearly clear, but foggy. She drank this, and her hair immediately reverted to her original color right before my eyes.

  “Now that’s impressive,” I gushed.

  “I’m making progress,” she said. “I’m a long way away from making Wolf’s Bane, though.”

  “You’re doing wonderfully!” I told her, giving her an encouraging embrace.

  “Thanks,” she said, a hint of pink coloring her cheeks.

  “I’m really glad to see you making so much progress,”
I told her. “Look how far you’ve come in just one day!”

  “I’m surprised myself,” she said. “I never thought I would have any useful talents.”

  “Are you kidding me?” I corrected her. “The way you memorized that exorcism before? The way you picked up cooking so quickly? You’re a gem, and my brother is crazy lucky to have you.”

  She flushed again and said, “I’m lucky to have him, too.”

  “I don’t know about that,” I teased her. “I’ve known him longer than you and he can be a real butthead.”

  Jamie giggle and said, “Maybe so, but he makes me happy.”

  I smiled and hugged her again and I told her, “You make him happy, too.”

  “Please don’t tell anyone about my progress,” she said. “I want it to be a surprise, and I don’t want Will worrying about me.”

  “Alright, I won’t tell a soul,” I promised. “Not even Alexi.”

  “Thanks,” she breathed with relief.

  Jamie and I left the kitchen and Alexi looked relieved to see me. He still couldn’t stand any degree of separation between himself and me, unless I was being guarded closely by his brother.

  “What was that about?” Alexi asked, tilting his head like a puppy.

  “Just girl stuff,” I said, winking at Jamie. “Have you made any more calls this morning?”

  “I have been with you all morning,” he said. “When would I have…”

  “Alexi,” I interrupted him. “It wasn’t a question. It was a hint.”

  “Ah, I see,” he said. “When Liam makes his way downstairs, I will attend to that immediately.”

  “I can go find him if you want,” Jamie offered.

  “Would you? I actually have some stuff I need to do today, too,” I told Jamie.

  “Yeah, I’ll check his room first,” she said. “Maybe he’s still asleep and I can lure him out with the promise of a great breakfast.”

  “You’re a peach,” I told her.

  Jamie left to find Liam and Alexi asked me, “What stuff do you plan to do today?”

  “Well, among other things I would like to visit the crystal to see if it’s still too loud for me to be near,” I told him. “I can still feel it and I need to figure out why I’m so connected to it.”

  “I am not thrilled about the idea, but I trust your judgment,” Alexi said.

  I smiled at him and put my arms around his shoulders, bending to kiss his cheek. “Thank you,” I whispered into his ear.

  He took my hands and turned them over, kissing the palms before pressing them together and clutching them tightly. I closed my eyes and leaned against him, enjoying the closeness.

  The door opened behind us and I heard Kai say, “There you are!”

  Without moving from my comfortable position leaning on Alexi I said, “Where else would we be at breakfast time?”

  Ignoring me, Kai said, “Did Will tell you?”

  “Tell me what? I haven’t seen him this morning,” I answered.

  “We found some information that might help with the wolves.”

  This perked me up. I turned to face him and asked, “What did you find?”

  “Well, Will found it,” Kai said. “He read that the best way to kill a werewolf is by severing their spine at the base of their skull. This kills them instantly and gives them no time to heal.”

  “Ok, makes sense,” I said. “So what does that mean? Severing their heads?”

  “Not necessarily,” Kai answered. “A well-placed bullet or arrow could do it. Or a dagger. Anything that severs their spine instantly should work.”

  “I see,” I said. “That’s definitely good to know. The trouble might be getting close enough to do it, or getting them to be still long enough to make a shot like that.”

  “True,” Kai said. “Maybe that potion thing will work out.”

  “Alexi’s going to make more calls today,” I said. “I’m really hopeful that he’ll find someone.”

  “And if not?” Kai asked.

  “If not then we remember we, along with Logan’s pack, outnumber Carson’s pack,” I said. “A fact that Alexi reminded me of yesterday. The numbers are in our favor.”

  “Unless Carson brings along some help, too,” Kai blurted out.

  “Oh no,” I groaned. “I hadn’t thought of that.”

  “Darling, do not worry,” Alexi said. “Carson is very cocky. He is likely to believe he is invincible, and probably will not anticipate the Council being involved. It is not likely he will bring additional help.”

  “What if he does?” I asked.

  “We will worry about that when the time comes,” Alexi answered. “Until then, we proceed as planned.”

  Liam came lumbering lazily through the door. He was yawning and his hair was disheveled. He plopped heavily into a chair and groaned.

  “You look like hell,” I told him.

  “Gee, thanks,” he grumbled.

  “What’s wrong with you?” I asked.

  “Couldn’t sleep.”

  “Sorry,” I said. “That sucks.”

  “I just need some coffee, stat,” he said.

  “Any breakfast?” Jamie asked.

  “Too tired to eat. Coffee. Black. Dark black. Jet fuel.”

  “Sure thing,” Jamie said.

  Liam dropped his head onto the table and groaned as though he had a hangover. I shook my head and figured he’d be useless for the day.

  “So… if Liam is out of commission and you’re making phone calls, where does that leave me?” I asked Alexi.

  “Kai can go with you,” Alexi said.

  Kai and I both looked at each other, dumbfounded, and then back at Alexi.

  “Really?” I asked cautiously.

  “It is clear he has become quite capable,” Alexi said. “I do not believe there is a significant danger to you at this moment, and I trust that he will be adequate protection for you if the need should arise.”

  “Is it that, or that you believe she can take care of herself?” Kai asked.

  “A bit of both, perhaps,” Alexi admitted. “I would, of course, feel much better if you were with me. But seeing as you have things to attend to and I must make calls, I think this is the best solution.”

  “And I’ll be fine once I have some coffee,” Liam said, lifting a finger in the air but leaving his head on the table.

  “I will go see about my calls now,” Alexi said with a quick kiss on my head. “You know where to find me if the need should arise.”

  I watched Alexi until the door closed behind him, and then I said to Kai, “Will you accompany me downstairs?”

  “Sure, what for?” he asked.

  “It’s technically Council business, but I know you can be trusted,” I told him. “It’s that top secret thing.”

  “Oh, I get to see the top secret thing? What happened?” Kai joked.

  “Alexi is just overcautious,” I said. “But I will warn you that this thing can be extremely dangerous so do not touch it under any circumstance!”

  “Yeah, yeah, got it, don’t touch,” Kai said. “Let’s go!”

  Kai followed me to the crystal room and I cautiously opened the door. The hum within me strengthened as soon as the door was cracked, but it was no longer deafening. I stepped inside the room with Kai following close behind, and I closed the door behind us.

  “What the hell is that?” Kai asked.

  “It’s some sort of crystal,” I explained. “No one is entirely sure what it is, but most people who get too close to it get zapped, and it doesn’t look pleasant. It happened to Alexi right in front of me, and it looked very uncomfortable.”

  “Can you touch it?” Kai asked.

  “Yes, and I’m not sure why,” I said. “All I know is that I was able to get into this room even though it’s been sealed by a really strong incantation for decades, and I can feel the energy of this thing resonating inside me all the time. It also seems to be draining the darkness out of me, although Alexi doesn’t believe that.�
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  “Why not?”

  “I don’t know,” I shrugged. “Maybe because he’s overprotective and naturally skeptical of everything. But I feel it. The darkness is slowly draining away.”

  “I hope so, because you need to be able to use your abilities,” Kai said.

  “That’s for sure,” I said. “Anyway, stay back. I’m going to try to communicate with it.”

  Kai backed against the wall and watched as I approached the crystal. Its hum grew louder as I approached it, but it was tolerable. I reached my hand toward it and I could feel it pulling my hand to its surface like a magnet. I closed my eyes and waited.

  Turmoil began to rage within me. My insides began to feel like a ship being tossed upon the briny sea by a raging storm. I was being ripped this way and that, and I was losing my bearings.

  I was in total darkness. It was as black as pitch all around me, and all I could hear was the constant resonating thrum of the crystal. It reverberated in and around me, throwing off all my senses. I could not pull away from it, but something told me I shouldn’t, anyway.

  After a while of raging turmoil, things began to soften. The jolting sway within me subsided, and I began to grow warmer and more content. Before long, I feel completely soothed. I could hear birds chirping somewhere in the distance. A hazy light began to come into focus. It grew brighter and brighter until I was standing in a meadow sprinkled with flowers. The sunlight was warm on my face, and the air was cleansing. My entire body and soul were relaxed and at peace.

  Moments later, the magnetic pull of my hand toward the crystal was released, and I stumbled backward. For a moment I was lost in vertigo. And when I got my bearings, Kai was steadying me.

  “Are you ok?” he asked me.

  “Yes, I’m fine,” I answered, touching my hand to my forehead. “In fact, I’m better than fine. I think the darkness is gone!”

  “Really? How do you know?” Kai asked.

  “I feel it,” I said. “I feel completely different. I saw this beautiful meadow, and the sunlight was so bright. The darkness is gone. I know it is! I need to tell Alexi!”

  I dashed toward his office with Kai following on my heels. I burst through the door with a huge smile on my face, and Alexi threw his hand into the air to silence me for a moment. I froze.