Once we all get checked into our rooms, I call Rex out into the hallway. Leaving him there to keep a watch over Doll and Sass, I go downstairs. Needing space, I stay in the parking lot sorting things on my bike. An hour later, I’m no more at ease than I was before.
Going back upstairs, I nod to Rex to say thanks for watching out, and head inside my room. Doll is curled up on the bed facing away from me. Deciding not to face anything, I go straight to the bathroom and shower. When I come out, Doll is sitting up in the bed waiting for me.
“Are you mad at me?” She asks with sadness in her voice and a look of dejection on her face.
Moving over to her, I climb into bed. Lying down, my head propped on a pillow up against the headboard of the bed. Pulling her into my arms, I lay her leg across me and rest her head on my chest. Running my hands through her hair I contemplate how to explain myself.
“I’m not mad, Doll. We both have a lot going on right now. Things are stressful. It’s not you, okay.”
She nods her head against me. Her fingers tracing over my tattoos like she’s come to do every night when we lay in bed talking just like this. I’ve found it unwinds me and I sleep better after our chats.
“Something’s wrong with Tank, isn’t there?” She asks.
“Doll, let it fuckin’ go.” She looks up at me. The depths of her blue eyes draw me in.
“He means a lot to Sass. I know the code, Tripp. I get that there are times you can’t tell me things, but Tank is important to my best friend. Is he okay?”
“Doll. You need to go to sleep.”
Not telling her what’s going on is killing me. I won’t lie to her. It’s not club business or information that would harm her, but I can’t tell her about Tank. She would feel obligated to tell Sass. I may not know Sass well, but I know her enough to know she’d flip her shit. It’s not something we need on this trip.
Things are safe and settled back home. Telling Sass now, she’d want to be on the first plane home and Doll to go with her. Roundman gave me the all clear to head home. I could put the girls on a plane, I’m sure. Selfish bastard that I am, I’m not ready to ride without Doll yet.
My business and my club need me back in North Carolina. The quicker I get back the sooner things will fall back into place. I should be walking away from Doll, putting space between us. I can’t though. Thinking of it, I pull her tighter against me. Kissing the top of her head, I continue playing in her hair until she finally falls asleep.
Chapter Twenty Nine
Acceptance
Doll
Waking up with Tripp is a peace deep inside of me. No matter how hard I try to stay awake, when I’m in Tripp’s arms I find the peace to sleep. This morning, I’m slightly unnerved. Tripp’s avoidance at answering questions about Tank last night lets me know something is going on. My anxiety is in overdrive about all the boys back home. I wanted to question him further when we settled in for the evening, but didn’t get any real answers. As he stroked my hair, the sound of his heart beating under me, and the comfort of his hold, I couldn’t stay awake long enough to push the issue.
Not much is said as we head out for the day. We cross into Kentucky. Instinctively, I know we’re headed to Bowling Green. We’ve met up with the boys of Heaven Hill MC before.
Pulling in, I see we are staying in a hotel that’s in their territory. Passing through on a run, our club has stayed here before. Getting off the bike, I stretch. My body is aching from the hours on the bike. We check in and shower.
Taking my cues from Tripp, I keep my distance. Really, I want to push him on the bed and ride him, giving us both the opportunity to release all the pent up frustrations and unshared emotions between us. He’s not showing any signs of being in that kind of mood. Instead, he seems restless, almost like a caged animal. Maybe that’s why he’s named Tripp, he doesn’t like when things get routine or common. I’ve become common to him and he’s ready for a change of scenery. I’m sitting on the bed as Tripp is staring out the window, when a knock at the door breaks our silence.
Going to the door, I open it to find Rex and Sass on the other side.
“Let’s go grab a beer, man.” Rex says as Sass nods her agreement. Tripp looks over to me. A strange look comes across his features before he agrees we need to get out.
We’re at a local dive. It’s a small, crowded bar and one that’s definitely crawling with Heaven Hill members. The space is full with pool tables to the right, a modern digital jukebox on the back wall between some dartboards. A few tables and a bar to the left, the restrooms are off the back wall, as well as, what I assume to be, their stock room.
Going straight to the bar, we order four beers. No taps here, take your liquor straight or your beer in a bottle the bar keep tells us. I like it. It’s small and a reminder of hanging out back home in one of the local places.
We aren’t there an hour and Rex is off with some bar fly in the bathroom after we watched them devour each other openly for a good twenty minutes. At one point, I was sure Rex was going to take her right there in the chair. She came over to say hi, I never caught her name before he pulled her on his lap and started making out with her. Since her mouth was full of his tongue there was no point in asking her name, she wouldn’t be able to answer. Hell, the way they’re going at it, I’m surprised the bitch can breathe. That tongue ring of his must be fun to play with.
A biker with long black hair waves Tripp over. He’s a Heaven Hill boy, so Sass and I stay put. Know your place Doll, I remind myself. If the other biker wanted us in the conversation he would’ve approached the table, not nodded for Tripp to join him. Leaving me and Sass to our own accord, I sit back, taking a pull on my beer.
“You okay, Sass?” She shrugs her shoulders. Taking a drink herself before replying, she seems more determined now.
“I talked to my dad. He said Tank’s not avoiding me, but unable to talk to me. Fuck ‘em all. My dad’s even sticking up for the bastard blowing me off now. It is what it is. I’ve talked to Nick a few times. He’s waiting for me to get back. He wants to take me out on a real date as soon as we get home. After all the traveling, I’m ready for something normal. I want to feel safe. Nick is secure.”
“Nick is not Tank, Sass. Nick can’t give you the rush you need in life.”
“Tank is my friend. He’ll always be my friend. The older we get and the more we deal with, the more I don’t want this. Hell, I can’t even call my fuckin’ friend right now and him answer me. It’s not for me, Doll. My question is….Doll, is this for you? Can you handle Tripp going on transports and not being able to reach him?” She asks, but before I can answer another Heaven Hill member approaches. I don’t catch his name as he snakes his arm around my shoulders. I brush him off me.
“Oh don’t be shy. The women who come here, come to hook up. Let’s go, baby, I’ll be gentle the first time.” He has a seedy grin spreading across his face.
“Not these women.” I say gesturing to Sass and myself. “We’re not here to hook up. I’m here with someone.”
The cocky bastard continues. “You’ve got no property patch. In these parts you’re fair game, no need to be a prude, we can share. I can satisfy you and your friend. The man you came with can even watch.”
Tripp approaches. His face serious, but I can tell he’s not sure what’s going on since the man isn’t touching me anymore and is casually leaning over the table. Standing, I reach out, grabbing Tripp by the waist and pull him to me. Snaking one hand up around his neck, I bring his face down to mine and kiss him. When I pull away, the serious look in his face has changed to heated desire. I tuck myself into him as I look over at the stranger.
“Like I said, I’m here with someone. I’m no bar bitch, so move the fuck on.”
Anger passes over his face at my tone with him. I’m sure very few women have given him lip before. When his eyes make their way to Tripp, he throws his hands up in defeat. I can hear him muttering as he passes us by.
“Not worth the hassle
, plenty of other pussy.”
“You okay?” Tripp asks, now understanding what happened. I wrap my arms around him tightly, resting my head on his chest.
“Perfect now, babe.” I answer, relaxing in the moment. For the first time in my life, it felt good to say I was someone other than Roundman’s Doll.
We hang out for a little while longer as I meet Tyler, Heaven Hill MC VP. He’s the biker that called Tripp over earlier. I’m introduced to Liam, the club Prez and his ol’ lady Denise. We meet a few other Heaven Hill members before we leave for the night. It was comforting to be in Tripp’s arms all night. If I was sitting, then it was on his lap. If I was standing, then it was with his arm around my waist and his hand down in the back pocket of my jeans cupping my ass cheek. I’m not used to having someone on me like that, and if it had been anyone else, it would have annoyed the shit outta me. With Tripp, though, shit felt right. It felt good, so much so, I could spend my lifetime in that man’s arms, by his side and never get enough of him.
Tripp
Waking with Doll tangled in me after a night making her body tremble beneath me is a happiness I’ve never had. As a kid, my grandpa always talked about the love he and my grandma shared. Every moment he had with her was a treasure. He always told Rex and me, “Treasure your women when you find them. Make sure your woman knows that she’s the center of your world. There is no better feeling then waking up to the person who accepts everything about you. The moment she climbs into your arms, when she seeks you out as her comfort, her protector, and her love. You carry that moment for a lifetime.” Last night, Doll came to me. She could’ve shut the guy down without claiming herself as mine, but she didn’t. Pop’s was right, there’s no better feeling than waking up with Doll after she’s climbed into my arms. Choosing me, she’s choosing me.
The thoughts of having her like this for my lifetime brings warmth deep inside of me. Today, I bring her back to my house. Tonight, I will have her in my bed. Tomorrow, I return her to her world. Tomorrow, I say goodbye to my lifeline. Tomorrow, I say goodbye to my heart because when I leave, I leave it with her. As much as it’s going to suck, I’m going to leave her. It’s going to crush me, but I’m going to walk away. The other thing Pop’s always said, “Don’t give your woman unnecessary pain.” My life would be unnecessary pain for Doll.
I have all of today, tonight, and tomorrow’s drive to make sure Doll knows she’s my treasure. Starting in this moment, when I gently rub the back of my hand against her face. Knowing she’s asleep, I share what’s on my mind.
Whispering to her, “You’re everything, Doll. You’re the good in me. When the days get long, you’ll be what pulls me through. I’m gonna let you go, but I’m always gonna carry you with me.” I watch her breathing.
No longer able to contain myself, I move to kiss her forehead. Rolling her over, I kiss her cheek, then her neck. She’s waking up under me. I take my time trailing kisses over her neck and collarbone. She reaches up, running her fingers through my hair. Our eyes meet. The words are on the tip of my tongue, but unable to come out. I see the love this woman has for me in the depths of those piercing blue eyes. Does she see what I feel for her? Does she see the man behind the bike? Rather than speak the words, I spend my morning making love to her body. Taking in every second of this and committing it to my memory in a way to last me a lifetime.
Tomorrow, she’ll be home. Tomorrow, our ride will end. Tomorrow, I’ll be man enough to walk away. We’re in too deep. I never should’ve let this happen, emotions and entanglements are things I don’t do. Today, I’ll give her all of me. Today, I’ll take everything I can. Today, I’ll let my weakness for her consume me.
Chapter Thirty
One Last Night Together
Doll
For a moment, I almost slipped and told Tripp how I feel about him. What we shared this morning goes beyond orgasms. He claimed a piece of me that I don’t want back. I gladly walk away knowing a piece of me is with him. We get up and shower together. It’s like Tripp can’t get close enough to me. I take in every second of it, knowing we are headed home and our future is uncertain.
We’re on the road again. Crossing over into North Carolina, my chest tightens. I don’t know what tomorrow brings. Pulling in to Tripp’s house, I’m so grateful to be off the bike. My body is sore from spending almost a month on the back of a motorcycle.
Once we unpack the bikes, Rex is itching to go out. Tripp looks at me, trying to gage whether we’re going out with Rex or not. Deciding it would be nice to hang out with his boys, I get ready so we can go. It’s strange riding in a truck with Tripp. Sass is riding with us and Rex took his bike. The danger has been eliminated. I’m sure his plans for the night don’t involve returning home.
Walking into the bar, I look over and see Tessie working tonight. Tripp is stopped immediately by one of his club members wanting to chat. Sass and I leave him there and make our way to Tessie. She smiles and places our beers in front of us as we settle onto the stools.
“Good to have y’all back.” She smiles.
The last time we were here, we got to know her a little bit and she’s genuinely a nice person. If given the time to hang out, I know we could be good friends. We’re chatting away, catching up on the drunken escapades she’s seen while we were away. Sass and I told her about seeing the sights and the weather while on our trip. Tessie doesn’t know why were gone and she’s doesn’t need to either.
Tripp comes up behind me, his hands coming around my waist as he drops his head down to my neck. His hair is down and brushes against my bare shoulder causing me to shudder.
“This is a first.” Tessie says with a smile that lights up her entire face. “Never thought the day would come where Tripp was tamed. There’s hope for all you Hellions yet.”
Surprisingly, Tripp hears her, but doesn’t deny being tamed. My heart wants to latch on to this and go with it. My head knows it’s unwise to have any expectations or desires outside of what Tripp is willing to give me today, and today only.
Rex has been wondering around the bar. For once he’s ignoring all the bar flies though and only talking to his brothers. Hmm… I wonder what’s going on with him. Tripp is casually wrapped around me, never letting go as his boys come and go, stopping to catch up before leaving. Rex makes his way over to us. Initially, I think it’s for Tripp, but when he turns and goes behind the bar, I’m surprised.
Turning around, Tessie runs right into Rex’s chest. Before any of us register what’s going on, Rex is leaning down and kissing Tessie. Her arms go around his neck as he’s pulling her up against him. I don’t know what to think. Tessie told me they have a history. This is not something in the past though, no this is a kiss shared between lovers. Quickly becoming a moment that they should consider getting a room. He pulls away abruptly. Her face is flushed. He knew what he was doing getting her worked up with that kiss. Apparently, incredible kissing is in the Crews genes because one kiss from Tripp can melt me into a puddle. The look on Tessie’s face makes it apparent she’s become a puddle. Slapping her jean clad ass as he tells her that he’ll meet her at her place after work and walks back over to the room in the back with the pool tables. Well, I know what he’ll be doing later.
Tessie’s shock is apparent as Rex leaves her standing there. She shakes her head at me as Tripp is whispering in my ear his own surprise at Rex’s behavior. He’s the man of no repeats, except maybe where Tessie is concerned.
After exchanging numbers with Tessie to keep in touch, we leave the bar. Back at Tripp’s, Sass immediately takes off to Rex’s room. We go to Tripp’s room. I watch as he removes his boots, socks, and then his cut and shirt. The ripple of his abs, the details of his ink, and the ‘v’ of his hips, and every inch of this man’s body is consuming me. Walking up to him, I remove my shirt and jeans as I go.
Standing before him in my black satin bra and panties, I look up at him. Reaching out, I grab for his jeans, unbuttoning them. I unzip them and push them off with his b
oxers. He’s naked in front of me as I drink him in.
“You want something, Doll?” I nod my head in agreement as I bite my bottom lip. “Then take it babe.”
Take it I do. I push him down on the bed. Stepping back, I stand in front of him. I do a circle roll of my hips as I turn around putting my back to him. I slowly hook my thumbs into my panties. Teasingly, I remove my undergarments. Turning back around to face him, naked, I cup my own breasts, pulling at my erect nipples. Looking down, his cock is rock hard and standing at attention. Climbing over him, I slide onto his shaft. I still for a moment, taking in the sensation of him filling me to the hilt. Looking into his eyes, I feel joined with him completely, our souls entwined. As I lean over and kiss him, I begin to move. Slowly, I ride him. Leaning up, he takes my nipple in his mouth, sucking. I clinch my core around him as the energy zings through me. His hand comes down. His fingers finding our joined bodies, he rubs my clit, pushing me higher to ecstasy. I’m trying to stay in control here, but the more he touches me the more I want to let go and release everything. I’m so close, but I’m holding back. I want this to last because I know tomorrow he’s going to leave me and not look back.
When he’s had enough of my pace and my tight rein on my orgasm, he rolls us over. Now he’s in charge. Pinning my arms above my head, he begins pulling all the way out and slowly sliding back in as his piercing grazes up the front wall of my core, causing me to tremble. He leans down, breathing heavily on my ear as he continues to keep his strokes in me slow and measured. Sensing my overwhelming need for release, he kisses his way to my breasts, as he finally increases our pace ;no longer teasing my impending climax, he’s now slamming into me. He comes down and sucks my nipple then nips it sending me over the edge. As my aftershocks milk him, he follows me, his warm seed exploding into my womb. He pulls out of me and holds me silently for the longest time as we both come down from our orgasmic bliss. Eventually he goes to the bathroom, returning with a washcloth to gently clean me up. He curls up in bed with me. Laying there in his arms, I don’t want this night to ever end.
A Ride or Die Kind of Love Page 15
