A Ride or Die Kind of Love

by Chelsea Camaron

  “It’s so much to learn.” With the end of her hair tied off, Noelle had no choice but to look up. “I’m still trying to understand the rules here.”

  One corner of Lex’s mouth quirked up. “Is that why you’ve been sitting at my vanity for way too long, looking nervous as hell? You don’t know if you’re supposed to sleep with me?”

  Yes, trying to hide things from Lex was pointless. Noelle flushed but refused to look away. “Mostly, yes.”

  Lex gestured to the bed. “Are you unsure about whether or not you’re invited, or concerned that I might try to fuck you?”

  “Try?” Noelle wrinkled her nose. “You’d succeed. I just...don’t know the rules. You know, with Jasper? With me? If he expects...” She was afraid to finish the sentence, afraid to see sympathy in Lex’s eyes. For all Noelle knew, Jasper was in bed with another woman right now. It didn’t feel like something he’d do...but he hadn’t come to Lex’s room, wondering where she was, either.

  “If he expects...?” Lex asked leadingly, then stuck the toothbrush in her mouth.

  She didn’t know if Lex honestly didn’t understand, or was forcing her to say it. “If he expects me to be...faithful.” That made her sound like a loyal pet, but she didn’t know a better word. Surely monogamous couldn’t apply, not when most of their sexual encounters had involved other people. “He’s said some things, but not exactly about that.”

  Lex rinsed her mouth and then the toothbrush. “What’d he do, tell you not to mess around with anyone else?”

  “Not exactly,” she repeated, remembering the night of the fight. He’d come on her face and she’d been so wet she ached when he told her to keep her fingers out of her panties. She’d spent half the night pressing her thighs together and listening to Lex’s breathing, as turned on by the command and denial as she had been by touching him.

  It wasn’t explanation enough. Lex was still watching her, so Noelle clutched at the hem of her T-shirt. “The night before I got my cuffs, he told me not to touch myself.”

  Lex’s brows drew together in a stormy frown that slowly smoothed into an expression of understanding. “Oh—not without him.” She wrinkled her nose again, this time with a laugh. “Damn, that’s hot. I’m impressed.”

  A little of the tension knotting Noelle faded, even as her cheeks burned. “It was hotter than I expected it to be. And then the next day...” She shivered. “That was the most I’d ever felt, until last night.”

  “I didn’t know he had it in him.” Lex flipped off the bathroom light, climbed back into bed, and patted the mattress beside her. “No wonder you’re spinning.”

  Switching off the vanity light plunged the room into darkness, but just enough light snuck under the door to the hall for Noelle to navigate to the bed. Lex’s features were a vague outline mostly in shadow, and knowing hers would be similarly shadowed made it easier to talk. “Sometimes he talks like he wants to own me. And that shouldn’t be okay. I shouldn’t like it, because that’s what they wanted to do in Eden. Own me.”

  “Does it feel the same?”

  “No. But does that matter? Isn’t it still being trapped, in the end?”

  “Maybe.” Lex traced a gentle fingertip over the ink encircling Noelle’s wrist. “You’re an O’Kane now, for good or bad. Does that make you feel sad and stifled?”

  “No. A little nervous, maybe.” She told Lex what had happened with Dallas at the bar, and admitted what she hadn’t told Rachel. “The more I thought about it, the more I realized how much I do know. Things my mother taught me so I’d be able to help my father and my future husband, things that could hurt the important men in Eden. Not just allergies, but secrets. Scandals. Dreams that they’ll compromise for, and weaknesses in their families that a smart woman could exploit.”

  “Or a smart man, like Dallas.”

  “Or a smart man.” Noelle caught Lex’s hand and twined their fingers together. “They’re not all corrupt. One or two of the councilmen try, and even the bad ones... Their wives and children are as helpless as I was. I don’t want to hurt people unless it means protecting us.”

  “Oh, honey. I know.” Her fingers tightened around Noelle’s. “At some point, he’s going to ask, though. It’s bound to happen.”

  She swallowed and closed her eyes. “I’ll have to tell him, won’t I? I made a promise.”

  “You wouldn’t want to try to lie,” Lex agreed quietly. “Especially if he came to you for information like that, because he wouldn’t do it unless he had no other choice.”

  “I don’t want to lie. I want to trust him.” And that was the crux of it, the part that felt foolish and hopelessly ingenuous. “I want to tell him everything and believe he wouldn’t hurt anyone who didn’t deserve it, not unless he had no other choice. Does that make me stupid?”

  “Not stupid. An optimist.” Lex nestled closer, curling up behind Noelle. “You don’t know yet. How hard Dallas has to work to keep life around here the way it is.”

  As comforting as Lex’s warm body was, Noelle missed the heavy press of Jasper’s arm. Both nights she’d slept with him, he’d tossed it over her body, pinning her in place with an unconscious sort of possessiveness. She didn’t have to be pressed tightly to his side to wallow in his warmth because he exuded heat.

  She hadn’t seen him since that morning, and she missed him. “I guess the men work hard. The women too, I mean...but the guys seem to be gone a lot.”

  “They’re around more than you think.” Lex laughed and nuzzled the back of Noelle’s neck. “You don’t have to wait for him to come to you, you know. If you want him, go get him.”

  Noelle bit her lower lip. “What if there’s someone else in his bed?”

  “Do you suspect there is, or do you want me to tell you if that’s how Jasper operates?”

  “Is it?”

  “No.”

  Noelle exhaled and clung to Lex’s hand. “Go get him? Just like that?”

  “Just like that.”

  It could work. Maybe it would even help. All the questions about her ability to say no might matter less to Jasper if she was busily, aggressively saying yes.

  First she had to figure out how. “Lex?”

  Lex rubbed Noelle’s arm. “Yeah?”

  “Will you teach me to dance?”

  “Sure, if you want. You don’t like hauling drinks?”

  Noelle laughed. “I don’t mind it. And I don’t know if I’ll be any good at dancing, but I want to learn how to be like you. Sexy and strong and seductive. Proud of it.”

  But Lex only snorted. “It’s all in the presentation, remember?”

  “Then you can help me with that too.” Lex wouldn’t see her flushed cheeks and smile, but she could probably hear the amusement and embarrassment in Noelle’s voice. “I apparently have a lot to learn about where jewelry goes.”

  “Short answer? Wherever you want to put it.”

  “Lex!”

  “What?” She laughed. “It’s true.”

  Tomorrow, Noelle would find some jewelry. Maybe she’d even let Lex show her how to wear each piece—or where. If Jasper had a problem with that, he’d have to do something about it.

  Like claim her for good.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Jasper knew it was damn near the end of the world—again—when Dallas rounded up everyone for a meeting. He usually preferred to deal with his men in small groups, but right now time was of the essence, and they all needed to be informed.

  Dallas lit a cigarette before sliding the pack over to Bren. “Everyone’s heard what went down with Wilson Trent. Our immediate problem is that we’re short one supplier, and we need to fill the gap fast if we’re not going to slow production. Big picture’s even uglier. No way could Trent have gotten his hands on those explosives on his own. Someone’s backing him—someone with money or power or both. And we need to find out who.”

  “City black market would be the likeliest source,” Bren said. “Military police. I have a friend on the inside I ca
n contact. Have him look into things.”

  “Do it,” Dallas told him without hesitation. “What about Trent? Did he say anything interesting before he died?”

  “He mostly screamed.”

  Even Dallas lifted his eyebrows at that. “Do I need to worry about who that girl’s gonna want to kill next?”

  Bren matched his expression. “Probably not until her hands heal.”

  At the other end of the table, Flash laughed. “What, that tiny piece of tail beat Trent to death bare-knuckled?”

  “I guess so.” Dallas shook his head. “Don’t get any ideas, Flash. No women in the cage fights. I don’t want Lex twisting your dicks off if you win, and I sure as hell don’t want to listen to you cry if you don’t.”

  Already, in Dallas’s mind, Lex was the one who took care of the women, his own counterpart in leadership. It made Wilson Trent’s taunts about her all the more chilling. “Couldn’t hurt to consider why this happened,” Jasper observed. “Whether Trent approached someone for help getting rid of you, or it started out the other way around.”

  Dallas drummed his fingers on the table. “Trent was stupid, but he knew how to suck up to power. And if he wanted something we had badly enough...”

  “He’d start dumbass negotiations with someone who hated you in a heartbeat,” Jasper finished.

  “Isn’t hard to find people who hate me. Someone who would trust that bastard not to fuck it up? That’s harder.”

  Bren drained his drink and set the glass down with a thump. “Unless it didn’t matter because Trent was a very expendable test shot, and the real shit has yet to go down.”

  “Pretty damn likely.” Dallas let his gaze drift around the table, taking the time to meet every man’s eyes, from Jasper and Bren on either side of him straight down to where Dom glowered at the far end of the table. “We’ve been top dogs in Four long enough to get a little lazy. That has to stop, because we’re playing in the big leagues now, whether we want to or not. We’re making too much damn money for everyone else to ignore. And that means we need to get better at information. Cultivate some more reliable contacts in all the sectors. We need to get smart.”

  Jasper pulled out a chair, turned it around, and dropped onto it. “Flash and I are friendly with fighters in all the sectors. Ace has the women covered. A girl in damn near every brothel, right?”

  Ace flipped him off, but not without a grin. “They like tattoos, I like blowjobs. It’s good math.”

  Bren looked skeptical. “He’s not going to start liking information as much as he likes his dick. No way.”

  “He will if I tell him to,” Dallas rumbled, smashing out his cigarette in the nearest ashtray. “Jasper, have you still got contacts in the countryside? We’re going to need more grain, fast.”

  One of his friends from the farm was managing his own now. “I can handle the corn, but I’ll have to make inquiries about the barley.”

  “Good. Bren, work with the girl. See if you can get anything else out of her about Trent’s organization. Especially the people likely to take over now.”

  “Maybe it should be us,” Dom muttered.

  “Edge into another sector?” Dallas’s fingers stilled. “We’re spread thin enough as it is. I don’t want more territory, I just want their contacts. However we have to get them.”

  “And maybe the next guy won’t be an idiot like Wilson Trent. Then you’ve got bigger troubles.”

  “We’ve got bigger troubles either way, which is why we’re going to dig in and protect what we have, not get greedy and sloppy.” Dallas jabbed a finger at him. “If you’re so hot to expand, work on finding new recruits—loyal ones who can earn their place the hard way. No shortcuts.”

  Dom lowered his gaze, his beefy arms still crossed over his chest in a posture that screamed defensiveness. Dallas ignored him and scanned the table again. “Trent said a few other things I didn’t like, particularly about the ladies. I don’t want the women out unaccompanied until we know what we’re dealing with.”

  Jasper rubbed a hand over his face. “I thought you didn’t want Lex twisting off any dicks.”

  Dallas pinned him with a cold look. “I’ll handle Lex. I’ll handle all the other girls who aren’t marked or collared, too. Those of you who have women, keep them close.”

  A taunt wrapped in admonishment. For all his positives, sometimes Dallas could be a prick as well as a hypocrite. “Message received,” Jasper drawled.

  “We’ll see, won’t we?” Dallas straightened and raised his voice. “Hit your rounds. It’s early last call at the club, and the girls’ll want you to clean up pretty and party with them. Get laid good tonight, because we’re all going to be busting ass for the next couple weeks.”

  The men started to file out, but Jasper lingered. “Should we more than double up if we have to go into Sector Three, or let those stops slide for now?”

  Dallas gestured for Bren to hang back and waited for the other men to close the door before speaking. “Anything outside of Four, I want the two of you on it together. I trust your guts and your heads. You’ll know if shit’s too hot, but you won’t get twitchy and start a territory war.”

  Bren shoved his hands in his pockets. “You think a war is what Dom’s after? He’s bucking for you to send someone to take over Three, and he sure the hell wants it to be him.”

  “I think Dom wants to get out from under my boot.” Dallas reached for his cigarettes again with a sigh. “He’s a bastard, and more of one every fucking week. Violence should be a tool, not the only way you get off. Not sure he knows that anymore, if he ever did.”

  They could let him try to take over Three, but even if Trent’s remaining men sent Dom back in a box, the other sector leaders would see it as an outright declaration of aggression on Dallas’s part. “We can’t let him try it. Nobody would believe he’d acted on his own.”

  “No, I’m going to keep him on a short leash. Pair him up with Maddox.” Dallas’s grin bordered on sadistic. “Dom’s not smart enough to know he’s too stupid to fool Maddox.”

  Because Mad was an evil genius, the only man in Sector Four more brutally efficient than Bren and more charming than Ace. “I didn’t know he was back.”

  “He’s not—yet. But he should be rolling in tonight before the end of the party.”

  For all the joking Jasper and Ace had done, it seemed Dom might end up dead, after all. “If anyone will know how to handle it, it’s Mad.”

  Dallas nodded. “Now, on the topic of information... Bren, get what you can from Six. Make her life a little more comfortable. I don’t want her running unsupervised through the compound yet, but once we’re sure she’s not playing a long game...”

  “I’ll make sure she’s happy.”

  “Without giving her any more people to beat to death.”

  Bren nodded blandly. “I’ve got it covered.”

  Dallas swung to face Jasper. “As for you and Miss Cunningham, I think she knows more about the people running the city than I gave her credit for. Find out how much. No need to interrogate her, but I think she’ll take it a hell of a lot better if you ask than if I have to.”

  So that was his endgame. “Do you want me to squeeze her for information or collar her? Because they might wind up being mutually exclusive options.”

  Dallas rocked back in his chair and lit his cigarette before eyeing Jasper over the smoke. “You think it would hurt her?”

  “Noelle’s father is a powerful man,” Jasper reminded him. “Yeah, I think she’ll mind if we have to crush a few just like him. Not for their sakes, but for the collateral damage.”

  “And if it comes down to them or us?”

  “She’s not weak, and she’s not stupid.”

  Dallas took a long drag and stared up at the ceiling. “I’ve got a little time. You make your decision about her, and then I’ll make mine.”

  Jasper had made his choice, and the rest was up to her. No way could Dallas say the same. “She’s still new.”

&n
bsp; “She’s one of us.” Dallas’s flat tone invited no argument. “If you can’t keep her and question her at the same time, I’ll respect that. But it means I’ll be the one asking the questions, and hoping she’s as strong and smart as you think she is.”

  “Understood.”

  “Yes. Yes, it is.”

  Dallas seemed just as upset by the conversation as Jasper was, and that quelled a little of his irritation. “Cheer up. Like you said—Noelle’s one of us.”

  “Mmm.” Dallas exhaled again, blowing smoke into the air and watching it disperse. “I suppose I couldn’t have you all to myself forever. Get out of here and get some work done.”

  Not in the mood to talk about it, then. “Fights tonight?”

  “Damn straight. Bet we’ll see a big crowd, too. They always come sniffing around when there’s blood on the concrete.”

  “The spectators are even more bloodthirsty than the fighters.” Jasper held up his fist.

  “Always.” After only a moment’s hesitation, Dallas left the cigarette between his lips and bumped his own fist against Jasper’s. It was silent acknowledgment, an apology and forgiveness in one gesture.

  “Tonight.” The only promise he could offer. He’d get things straight between himself and Noelle. The rest of it was between her and Dallas.

  Noelle didn’t need to ask Lex for advice on her wardrobe anymore. She’d chosen tonight’s ensemble on her own, everything from the short leather skirt to the matching halter that wrapped around her throat and ended just above her belly button, baring pale skin and the curve of her hips. She had new boots, too, custom-crafted ones that somehow managed to mix tough practicality with a sleek sort of sensuality.

  Dressed in leather and ink and her newly blossoming pride, she looked like an O’Kane. It was exhilarating.

  The noise of the celebration hit her the moment one of the bouncers hauled open the door for her. Screams and cheers, drowning out the faint hint of music coming from the far side of the room. The warehouse had stark lighting, bare bulbs that looked like they’d been scavenged from before the storms. They cast their brash but uncertain light everywhere but where the action was—the cage.