Journey of Fire and Night (The Endless War Book 1)

by D. K. Holmberg

  “There’s something else here that I need to see,” he said. “Once I understand what it is, I’ll be back.”

  Alena closed her eyes for a moment and then turned south, as if searching for where the draasin had disappeared to. “With the increase in attacks, are you certain that it’s wise to go alone?”

  Eldridge smiled at her. “Ah, Alena, you know that I’m never alone.”

  With that, he took to the air and started south, quickly disappearing from view.

  Alena stared after him for a moment. “You will want answers.”

  “I think I deserve answers.”

  She turned, anger flashing in her eyes. “Deserve? What makes you believe that you deserve anything?”

  “I’ve seen our people killed by them. I’ve seen what we’ve lost.” He still refused to tell her about Katya. Saying anything about that would only make him more emotional, and he was not about to let her see him that way. “They attack and destroy. How many cities have been razed by them? How many more will suffer because you’ve just healed one of them?”

  His voice rose as he spoke, and he forced himself to take a breath to calm himself. Would it matter if he got angry? Not with Alena, not after what he’d seen her capable of doing. Maybe this was part of the reason Lachen had sent him to the barracks.

  Had he suspected? Could he have known his hunters refused to hunt? That they healed draasin killed by other hunters?

  Jasn would need to tell him. He’d come to the barracks to learn to hunt the draasin. That had been his desire for revenge, to finally have a chance to destroy one of the creatures that had destroyed so much of him.

  “You know so little, Warrior Volth.” She spat his title, saying it with scorn. “You, who were once such a promising healer, and now…” She shook her head, her eyes filled with contempt as she stared at him. “Now you think only of death rather than finding healing for the one person most in need of it from you. If you must share with the commander what you’ve seen here, then so be it. But do so because you truly believe that what I have done is wrong.”

  She crafted a shaping and disappeared on a thunderbolt, leaving Jasn standing alone in Rens, once again trying to find answers.

  The last time he’d been in Rens, he’d wanted nothing more than to die. In a place like this, he almost had. He could still taste the blood from the attack and could still feel the heat from the unseen draasin, from the creature he knew was only feet away from him. Had he known then what he knew now… He probably would be no better equipped to face the draasin. What had he learned in his time at the barracks? Only that the lessons learned in Atenas were only the beginning, not the endpoint. That there were shapers like Alena and Calan, hell, even like Eldridge, infinitely more capable than him. He might know how to control the elements, but he had none of the delicate skill Alena demonstrated nor any of the raw strength Calan possessed. He might be the Wrecker of Rens, but he had only a fraction of their expertise.

  He needed to return to the barracks. Alena might not be willing to keep working with him, but maybe there would be another. Calan might take on another student, or one of the others. Someone had to be more willing to teach him, to show him how to hunt the draasin, to destroy them. Sharing what happened here might be the way to accomplish that.

  As Jasn crafted his traveling shaping, readying each of the elements that would pull him back to the barracks, a shadow swirled over him.

  He glanced up and saw a draasin flying overhead. Two spikes on the tail, so female. She swooped down and Jasn panicked, reaching for his sword, but couldn’t unsheathe it quickly enough.

  The draasin landed in front of him, and he realized she was much smaller than any he’d seen, even smaller than the little one in the barracks. She sniffed, tilting her head as she breathed in his scent. Heat billowed off her, but not with the same intensity as the larger were capable of producing.

  Was this a gift? Was he given an opportunity to slay this draasin and return with a talon as a prize? Perhaps that was all that was needed for him to return to the barracks and find a different instructor. Alena might be angry—Jasn could only imagine her rage upon learning that she had saved one only for him to kill another—but wasn’t that what he trained to do? At the very least, that was what he was supposed to be learning.

  The draasin stared at him, eyes wide as it did. Jasn had the distinct sense of air blowing around him, but his jacket didn’t move with it. A wave of nausea rolled through him, and he had a sense that he moved.

  Then it stopped.

  The draasin blinked and then flapped her wings as she blew hot air in his face.

  Jasn unsheathed his sword, readying a shaping. This one might be small, but it was still one of the draasin, and if he let it grow larger, then it would eventually attack like all the others. Rens would claim it, use it as they attacked…

  He took a step toward it and it stood in place, watching him with wide eyes. He had another sense of movement, and for a moment, he saw a reflection of himself in the draasin’s eyes, almost as if seeing through them. He was streaked in orange and red, and his sword glowed a cool blue.

  The draasin blinked and the image faded. Then she blew another breath of hot air at him with a snort.

  Was the damn creature playing with him?

  “Stupid animal,” he muttered, bringing his sword up. It was time to end this, regardless of the fact that this particular draasin seemed no more dangerous than a wolf cub. But like the wolf, the draasin would grow, and nips that were cute as a cub would one day have the capacity to tear throats open. It might not be deadly now, but it soon would be.

  The draasin eyed the sword and then flicked her tail quickly, catching Jasn on the wrist, sending his sword flying.

  Jasn grunted. His wrist stung where the draasin hit him, but not much more than that. Water healed him quickly enough but didn’t need to this time. Jasn went for his sword.

  The draasin crouched over it, licking the blade with her tongue, blackening it.

  This creature didn’t seem interested in attacking, apparently unconcerned with him in general. When he approached, she swung her tail again, stopping just short of hitting him. Then she snorted, hot air sending him staggering backward.

  “Damn you,” he said.

  The draasin flapped her wings and jumped back. Jasn grabbed his sword, noting the change in the blade. The draasin tipped one wing, pushing him, then she lowered her head and rested it on the ground at his feet.

  All it would take would be one sharp stab with his sword. He’d seen the shaping Calan had used on the larger one, and with one this size, it wouldn’t take nearly as much strength. The draasin lay almost as if waiting for him to strike.

  Katya would want him to do this, wouldn’t she? She’d have wanted him to finish what she started.

  After all the time he’d spent in Rens, this was what he had truly wanted. A chance for revenge. Only now that he had the chance, he hesitated.

  To Katya, he was a healer, never meant to see war, never meant to go to the border and face the death and violence found there. She wanted him to remain in Atenas until she returned, and then… They would have gone together.

  Only, they never had the chance. The draasin took that from them.

  So much had changed since her death, and not only for him.

  Who was he now? What kind of shaper was he meant to be? Was he to be the healer, the man who once wanted nothing more than to understand the way water worked within a person to exact healing, studying with some of the greatest healers known, or was he to be the Wrecker of Rens, the man who couldn’t die, the warrior willing to risk himself for whatever was necessary to see that Rens fell?

  Jasn knew he couldn’t be both. There was no way that he could be both healer and killer. By sending him to the barracks, Lachen had asked him to be the killer. That was what he had brought him to learn.

  Or had he? He had wanted him to learn from Alena.

  Had Lachen known? Was that why he chose him?<
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  This draasin might eventually grow larger, and it might one day attack, but that day was not today. How could he destroy something staring at him with eyes that seemed to know the struggle raging within him?

  Jasn slammed his sword into his sheath and took a step back.

  The draasin watched him, and the strange expression on her face changed. She stood on her back legs and snorted a finger of fire from her nostrils that wasn’t hot enough to reach him or to burn him.

  He stepped away and pulled the shaping to him, a troubled thought coming to him.

  What if he was neither the killer nor the healer? Who would he be then?

  26

  Ciara

  Within Rens, the change was starker as their people escaped danger. Those meant to lead never learned of their destiny. Those who would otherwise have lived lives of no consequence became something more.

  —Lren Atunal, Cardinal of the College of Scholars

  Night began to settle in full, darkness filling the space around Ciara, leaving ever-lengthening shadows streaking around her. Cold wind shifted out of the north and she shivered, pulling the remains of her elouf tightly around her shoulders.

  The lizard switched its tail before turning to face her. It reached a long tongue across its lips and then nudged her again, pushing against her with its wide, thick head. There was a certain insistence to it that she’d noted before, and she stood, pushing up with her j’na.

  She stared across the rock. “What do you want from me now?”

  The more she spoke to the lizard, the more normal it felt, but when she returned to the villagers—if she returned… with as far away as she had wandered, she no longer knew if she’d be able to find them—she’d have to return to something closer to normal, and speaking to lizards was definitely not normal.

  The lizard pushed against her leg. If the lizard had its way, it would push her across the rock, away from the water, when she needed to return to the village and help guide them to the water.

  It hissed again, the suddenness of the sound splitting her ears. The last time the lizard had made that sound, the draasin had been attacked.

  “Stormbringer,” she swore.

  She turned her attention to the sky, but the growing darkness would make finding anything there difficult. The two little draasin had been attacked, but she hadn’t seen what happened to the larger one. Was that why the lizard was getting excited?

  The lizard pushed on her again. This time, it shoved her until she started walking. For such a small animal, it was strong. Ciara stumbled forward.

  “I’m going!”

  Now that she was moving, the lizard scurried past her. It paused to look back at her when she hesitated, as if it knew what she intended, and looked at her with eyes that suddenly seemed far too knowing for any animal.

  It hissed again, its tail switching with agitation.

  She shivered.

  What did she really know about this animal? It had saved her—she no longer doubted the lizard had been the reason she survived—and had brought her water, but now it appeared there was a price. The lizard used her, but for what purpose?

  Ciara continued after the lizard, and it turned again, seemingly satisfied.

  They walked away from the pool and the pile of gourds that had kept her alive. So far, thirst wasn’t an issue, but much farther and it would be. She should fight, turn and run back to the water, but every time she attempted to change directions, the lizard scurried in front of her and obstructed her.

  The rock around her began to change. Where it had been completely flat, now some variation began to appear. Cracks appeared, and she had to jump over them. The lizard simply weaved around them, navigating as if knowing exactly where to find them and how to avoid them.

  Then it stopped where the ground dropped off again in a ledge before starting again about ten feet below. If she went that way, getting back wouldn’t be easy. She wasn’t sure if she would even be able to make it back up this small climb, and then she would have to find a way up the massive shelf.

  The lizard pushed her again.

  She’d come this far. Why not farther?

  Ciara climbed down the rock and hung suspended by her fingers before dropping. She hit the ground and her ankle wobbled, then turned and finally gave out.

  Ciara fell and screamed, gripping her foot. Pain bloomed through her leg, shooting in waves. Blasted place, what was she thinking? She’d already been lucky not to hurt herself any more than she had. Why would she risk this when the village needed her?

  She had to see how badly she’d been injured. Stretching out her leg, she winced when she saw bone pushing against skin. There would be no walking away from this fall.

  The lizard somehow made it down the rock and nudged its head against her.

  “Get away,” she said. She bit back the tears threatening to spill down her eyes, but what did it matter if she wasted water? The gourds were all the way back by the pond, and she wouldn’t be able to walk. Crawling wasn’t an option, not with as far as she would have to go, even were she able to somehow make it up the wall.

  With sudden certainty, Ciara knew she would die out here.

  She lay back and stared up at the black sky. Of course she would die at night, in the darkness and without the warmth of the sun to kiss her last breaths.

  A hollow sense of peace overcame her at the finality of it all. Her father and the village would never know what had happened to her, but at least she’d done what she could for them and fought as long as she could. At least she’d learned that the draasin had not attacked on their own but had been forced by Ter.

  The lizard’s rough tongue ran along her leg, sending pain shooting through her again, stealing the sense of peace.

  “Leave me alone,” Ciara cried. Why couldn’t the blasted lizard just let her lie there? “I can’t help you anymore.” She pulled back, trying to kick with her good leg.

  The lizard crawled onto her leg. It was heavy and hurt as it sat on her.

  It worked its tongue along her leg, running it from her knee down to her ankle, focusing on where the bone pressed against her skin. The pain intensified, becoming unbearable, and Ciara screamed.

  Then the lizard crawled off her leg and curled up next to her head.

  Tears streamed down her cheek. “Why would you do that to me?” she asked it. “Why did you have to torment me? I thought…” She couldn’t finish. She thought what? That she and the lizard were friends? It was an animal, strange as it might be. Likely it would eat her as soon as she died.

  The lizard licked its tongue across its lips. It stood and circled her before sitting again by her feet. She’d propped herself up on her elbows, preparing to kick the lizard again, when she realized that something had changed.

  The pain in her ankle was gone.

  Carefully she pulled her injured leg back and ran her hand along it. Bone no longer pressed against the skin. She tried flexing her ankle and was able to do so without pain.

  Stormbringer! The lizard had healed her?

  She looked at it with a different light in her eyes. “What are you?”

  The lizard answered by blinking.

  Ciara laughed, getting to her feet. “Was that why you climbed onto the draasin? Were you healing it?”

  The lizard blinked again.

  “You healed me when I fell from the wall, didn’t you?” How badly had she been injured? She’d lain there for what seemed like days, with each passing moment thinking that the lizard was trying to peel her skin off, but it had been healing her.

  The lizard flicked its tail and nudged her with its head.

  Whatever this creature was, it was more than an animal. It was a gift from the Stormbringer.

  The lizard pushed her, getting her moving again.

  “Wherever you want me to go.”

  They’d walked for most of the night before she rested in the shade of a rocky overhang, sleeping fitfully. She awoke to the lizard licking her arms and legs
and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. Ciara still didn’t know where the lizard wanted her to go. More plants began to grow throughout the gradually changing landscape, now almost hilly. A dry grass grew, at first sparsely, and now in a thick brown carpet that crunched beneath her sandals. The thick, waxy-leaved plants changed, growing taller and the leaves longer. Fewer and fewer plants had sharp thorns.

  After walking nearly two hours, they stopped near a small pool of water. The lizard took a few drinks and Ciara drank hungrily, wishing that her waterskin was still intact so that she wouldn’t have to depend on finding another watering hole like this. Drinking helped refresh her, and the sense of water returned. She hadn’t realized it had faded until it was back.

  She leaned on her j’na, looking all around. These lands were nothing like the rest of Rens. She had thought that finding water was enough, and maybe it was, but lands like this might mean real safety for the village. They would be far enough from Ter that they might be able to settle.

  “Is this what you wanted me to see?” she asked the lizard.

  It blinked, and Ciara had the sense that there was a reason the lizard had brought her here. She felt an urgency from it, but why? There was nothing around but a changing landscape. Not any threat to the lizard and no sign of the draasin.

  They continued onward. The lizard led, and Ciara no longer felt strange following the creature. Whatever else, she began to recognize that the lizard had a real intelligence, but she wondered if she really was safe following it. Something intelligent enough to guide her like this would have an agenda of its own, and it wouldn’t necessarily be the same as what Ciara wanted. And just because the lizard had healed her—twice now—didn’t mean it had her interests in mind.

  But she couldn’t simply ignore the fact that the lizard had helped her. Didn’t she owe it a little measure of trust?

  The sun was beginning to set by the time they found another pool of water. This was larger than the last, and as Ciara drank from it, she recognized that it was nearly as deep as the one she’d abandoned the gourds near. Trees actually grew in places, real trees with thick green leaves that unfurled to soak in the sunlight, not the burnt and dried stumps that she’d grown up knowing.