Faith

by Michelle Larks

  Monet nodded. “I miss church. It was the high point of my week. You know what, Reverend Wilcox?”

  “What’s that?” she asked.

  Monet explained about her conversations with God, and how He assured her to be patient and that everything would be all right. Monet went on to say how she had been leaning on the Lord more heavily than before. They continued talking, and she felt comforted. One-on-one time with Reverend Wilcox, to Monet, was a treat, on the scale of talking to her mother.

  Reverend Wilcox looked at her watch. “It’s later than I realized. It’s time for me to head home.” She and Monet stood up. “Monet, I want you to remember this simple verse when life gets overwhelming, and I believe it will comfort you. It’s from the book of Second Corinthians 5:7: For we walk by faith, not sight.”

  Then she took Monet’s hands in her own and bowed her head. “Heavenly Father, we know that you can make a way out of no way. No matter how bleak our lives may look, we only have to come to you with a meek and humble heart, because only you, Father, know what is really in our hearts. Lord, take care of Marcus and Monet. Help Marcus to understand that even in this uncertain time, you are still watching over his family, and that you never put more on us than we can bear. Father, I ask that you protect the new life that Monet is carrying. And when that baby makes her appearance, we’ll claim the victory for the miracle that you have bestowed upon your daughter, Monet. These blessings I ask in Jesus’ name. Amen.”

  “Amen,” Monet said in a strong voice. Then she and Reverend Wilcox walked hand in hand to the foyer. Monet took Reverend Wilcox’s coat out of the closet and handed it to her. When Reverend Wilcox put on her coat, she hugged Monet.

  “Keep the faith, Monet, and I promise you that everything will proceed according to God’s will,” Reverend Wilcox said.

  “I will,” she said, choking up.

  “Come back to church soon. We miss you.” Reverend Wilcox reached out and pressed Monet’s hands together.

  Monet nodded her head and said, “I’ll be there on Sunday.”

  After the women exchanged good-byes and Reverend Wilcox left, Monet locked the door. Then she headed to the kitchen. Duane and Derek had gone home after coming to the living room to speak to Reverend Wilcox and telling Monet that they were heading home. Marcus had long since retired to the basement. She wondered what the important news was that Marcus had wanted to share with them. Then she thought, Whatever it is, it can wait for another day. Monet fixed herself a bowl of stew and sat at the table and ate dinner alone, except for Mitzi. With so much tension in the air, the little dog had become more protective of her mistress.

  Chapter 18

  Monet returned to the Temple the Sunday after Reverend Wilcox’s visit as she promised she would. With strong impassioned cajoling from Monet, Liz, and Wade, Marcus agreed to attend the morning service with his wife. She called her brothers Saturday morning and asked them to join her for moral support. Duane promised he would be there, and Derek said he’d try to attend, but that it would depend on the outcome of his date the night before.

  Monet had awakened early Sunday morning around six, feeling jittery as if angst had soaked into her soul. She knew it was due to a combination of Marcus’s attitude, and their going out in public for the first time together during her pregnancy. She tried deep breathing exercises and praying, but afterward she was still left with a feeling of uneasiness.

  Finally, after praying to God, asking Him to give her strength for the day ahead, Monet picked up her Bible and turned to Romans 8:26 and read, “Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities; for we know not what we should pray as we ought; but the Spirit itself can make intercession for us with groaning that cannot be uttered.” She read the verse again, this time silently, using her finger to underline the words as she read them.

  After reading the scripture, Monet’s spirit buoyed. She lay down on the bed for a few more minutes. Then she got up, made up the bed, walked to the closet, removed a black pantsuit since the temperature had dropped below zero, along with a butter colored blouse, and set them on the bed.

  After she showered, she spread Victoria’s Secret pear body lotion over her body and donned her undergarments and hosiery, then put on a fluffy pink chenille robe. Then Monet went downstairs to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. She cooked enough eggs, bacon, grits, biscuits, and coffee for both of them, and then called Marcus, but he didn’t answer. She heard him stirring around in the basement. Monet sat down at the kitchen table, and once again, ate breakfast alone. She drained a glass of milk and placed it in the sink, along with her plate and utensils.

  Twenty minutes later, Monet was dressed and sitting on her vanity stool applying her makeup. She pressed her lips together after putting on a coat of red lipstick. She then slid her feet into a pair of black leather boots. She put a gold bangle watch on her wrist, a gold chain that belonged to her mother around her neck, and gold hoop earrings in her pierced ears. She sprayed Lancome’s perfume, Hypnose, over her suit jacket, and then put it on.

  Monet looked at her face in the mirror and tried to smile, though her lips trembled. “I don’t know why I feel so uneasy. Lord, grant me peace,” she said aloud.

  She walked downstairs and found Marcus sitting in the living room watching Sports Center on the plasma television. He caught sight of his wife and his breath seemed to catch in his throat. He thought, She is still as fine as the first time I saw her in study hall when I was in tenth grade.

  He wanted to gather her in his arms and never let go. Instead, he asked Monet brusquely, “Are you ready to go?” He walked to the foyer and removed their coats from the closet.

  When he held up Monet’s coat and she put her arms into the bell shaped sleeves, the scent of Hypnose wafting from her body tantalized his sense of smell. Anyone looking at Monet would think she was thirty years old instead of forty. Her curly hair was piled high on her head, and Marcus thought she looked elegant.

  Monet wanted to reach out and hug Marcus. He looked so handsome in his black suit and white shirt, accessorized with a yellow tie. But his stoic expression kept her urge at bay. She waited for him to put on his black wool coat, and then they walked to the kitchen and out the back door.

  “Did you—” she began saying.

  “Yes, I gave Mitzi her food this morning,” Marcus replied, cutting her off.

  A few minutes later, they were in traffic headed to the Temple. Monet turned the radio to WVAZ and listened to Effie Roth host the gospel brunch during the drive. When they arrived at church, the parking lot was starting to fill with automobiles. They walked inside to find Liz and Wade chatting with other members. When they spied their friends, they ended the conversation and sped toward Monet and Marcus.

  The women gabbed, while Wade thumped Marcus on the back. “I’m glad you came today,” he said. “I think you’ll feel better when you leave. Church will fill your soul with peace, and cure all your ills.”

  Marcus sucked his breath loudly and stopped himself from rolling his eyes.

  “I wonder if my brothers will join us today,” Monet commented to Liz as she looked around the area.

  “I haven’t seen them yet. Let’s go to the ladies room before service starts,” Liz said.

  Monet looked at her watch. “Okay, but let’s hurry up. I don’t want to be late for the start of service.” She unbuttoned her coat and took off her hat.

  The women told the men they would return in a few minutes. The restroom was empty. Liz went into a stall and emerged seconds later. Monet took off her coat and draped it over her arm. She took a long tailed comb out of her purse and picked at her hair. Liz washed her hands and re-applied her lipstick.

  “I like that suit,” Monet told Liz as she looked at her friend from head to toe. “Where did you get those matching shoes from? They look new.”

  “Girl, you know me, I’m the DSW queen. I was browsing the mall and saw them and thought they would go perfect with my royal blue suit.”

  “Nic
e.” Monet nodded. “I think it’s time for us to go. The parking lot was beginning to get crowded. I hope we can all sit together.”

  “Don’t worry about it, we’ll be fine,” Liz replied.

  They left the ladies room and walked to the sanctuary. The doors were still closed. The choir had marched into the auditorium before Monet and Marcus’s arrival, and the combined choirs were now singing “The Lord’s Prayer.” Monet was pleased to see Duane standing with Marcus and Wade. The siblings embraced and exchanged greetings. When the usher opened the middle door, Marcus stood on one side of Monet and Duane on the other, while Liz and Wade walked behind them.

  When they entered the sanctuary, the congregation rose and began clapping. Monet was taken aback and her steps faltered. She was confused for a moment, until she realized they were clapping for her.

  Her eyes filled with tears and she said, “Thank you, Father.” The usher walked them to the third row of the middle pew.

  Reverend Wilcox came down from the pulpit and embraced Monet and told her, “Welcome home.”

  Marcus sat next to his wife, and Liz slid on the other side. “You knew about this, didn’t you?” Monet asked Liz.

  “Of course I did,” she replied smugly. “I knew you were feeling a little shaky about coming out in public and returning to church, so Reverend Wilcox and I put our heads together and came up with this, so you could get it over with in one fell swoop.”

  “Elizabeth Anne Harrison, I’m going to get you later,” Monet promised.

  The church clerk read the announcements. Before the choir sang their A selection, Avis, the choir director, walked up to the pulpit. “Giving honor to God and Reverend Wilcox, I’d like to just say how happy I am to see our sister and choir member, Monet Caldwell, at church today. Our prayers were with you for a speedy recovery, and God didn’t fail us. Church, doesn’t she look good?” The congregation clapped fervently as the organist played a jazzy riff. “We’ve missed you, Monet,” Avis continued. “And we await your return to your rightful place in the choir. The choir would like to dedicate our A and B selections to our sister, Monet.”

  Monet initially felt abashed when Avis began talking, then her heart filled with joy that spilled over from her eyes as the choir began singing “Jesus Can Work It Out.” Her head swayed to the beat of the music, and peace flooded her heart when the choir began singing their B selection, “Long As I Got Jesus, I Don’t Need Nobody Else.”

  After tithes and offerings were collected, Reverend Wilcox walked to the pulpit and said in a cherry voice, “Isn’t God good, church?” Replies of Amen and Hallelujah and thunderous clapping rented the air. “I don’t know what you came to do, but I came to praise His name.” She raised her hands. “I was talking to a new church member the other day. Her walk with God is a new one, and she said to me, Reverend Wilcox, I just don’t understand why God allows bad things to happen to good people.”

  Marcus felt like she was talking to him, and he squirmed in his seat, while Monet’s eye brimmed with tears.

  “We go to church, we spread the news about Jesus, and yes, we tithe. Some people feel like that means they have a first class ticket to heaven, along with immunity from the trials and tribulations of life,” Reverend Wilcox said. Then she took a sip of water. “But church, that’s not what life is about. We suffer through all types of ordeals, and along the way we learn to trust in God and know that He will never leave or forsake us.” The church clapped, signaling their approval. “For those of you that have your Bibles with you today, I’d like you to open it to Isaiah 26:3 and 4, and Proverbs 3:5 and 6. Please read along with me,” she instructed the church.

  The congregation’s voices sounded strong as they read, “Thou will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind stayed is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the Lord for ever; for in the Lord Jehovah is everlasting strength.” There was a rustle of pages as the members turned to the book of Proverbs. Then they continued reading. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him and he will direct thy path.”

  “Trusting in the Lord is what helps Christians accept the bad things in life that happen to good people, and help us realize that we’re not alone.” Reverend Wilcox eyes roamed around the sanctuary.

  “We live in a busy world, a digital society with statistics that tell us how quickly someone is killed, or how many children are born a minute, how many people will die from cancer or AIDS in a year. All you have to do is log on to a computer, do a Google search, and you’ll be privy to all kinds of information. But despite the bad news that seems to overwhelm us at times, the earthquakes and hurricanes, rising unemployment, and hard times, there is one constant in life that’s never mentioned in the newspapers and that’s the love of Christ. He’s our redeemer, our Savior, our bright and morning star, and He will never leave us alone. He will bring us comfort and peace when we need it most.” Reverend Wilcox continued her sermon on trusting in the Lord and having faith that He would provide deliverance in any situation.

  Marcus half-listened and wore a bored expression on his face. He felt like Reverend Wilcox was singling him out, while Monet was totally intent on listening to the Word. Wade glanced at Marcus a couple of times, and could see by the set of his friend’s rigid jaw that he didn’t comprehend what Reverend Wilcox was saying. Wade closed his eyes and said a prayer for his friend.

  By the time Reverend Wilcox had finished her sermon, the church was on their feet rocking. Monet, Liz, and Wade were along with them, while Marcus and Duane sat in their seats. The doors to the church were opened to prospective new members, and several people walked down the aisle to the front row, where they were welcomed by the deacon board and ministry staff. The choir sang, “God Be With You Until We Meet Again,” and recited the benediction.

  Monet’s spirit was overflowing, and she berated herself for not coming to church sooner. Reverend Wilcox stood in the back of the church at the conclusion of the service to speak with her members. Liz whispered to Monet that Reverend Wilcox wanted Monet to join her.

  Monet’s eyes widened. “Me?”

  “Yes you. The members have been inquiring about you ever since the attack, so Reverend Wilcox and I thought it would encourage you to know that you’re not alone. The church loves you and stands behind you one hundred percent,” Liz stated.

  Monet turned to look at Marcus. He quickly said, “I’ll pass. I’ll see you in the parking lot when you’re done.” He put on his coat and black fedora hat and went outside.

  Liz was disappointed in Marcus’s response. Quietly, she just took Monet’s hand and they walked to the rear of the church to join Reverend Wilcox.

  “It would’ve been nice if you had joined your wife,” Wade said, walking out of the sanctuary behind Marcus.

  “She’ll be fine without me,” he replied brusquely as he turned to watch a good portion of the membership swarm around Monet.

  “Yes, she will,” Wade agreed,” but she still needs your love and support.”

  “I know, Wade, and I’m doing the best I can. Look, I’ll talk to you later.” Marcus turned and left the church.

  Monet was in church for over an hour. The outpouring of love was overwhelming to her at times, and tears streamed from her eyes. Liz handed her a tissue to dab at her eyes.

  When the last member had departed from the line, Monet turned and said, “Thank you so much, Reverend Wilcox. Talking to everyone was just what I needed. My heart is so full.” Her voice broke.

  Reverend Wilcox embraced her. “I’m glad. I thought you needed to see how precious you are in our eyes and in God’s.”

  Liz cleared her throat and held her hand out to Reverend Wilcox. “Your sermon was just beautiful. I’m going to find my husband and head home. Again, thank you.”

  “Bless you, Liz. I’ll see you back here at church on Wednesday for the mission committee meeting,” Reverend Wilcox said.

  Liz squeezed Monet’s arm.
“I’ll call you later.” Then she left.

  “Reverend Wilcox, I still feel like I can’t get through to Marcus. I was hoping he would lighten up a bit, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.” Monet shook her head sadly.

  “Everyone reacts to adversity differently, dear. We’ll continue to pray for Marcus. I know in time he’ll come around,” she said sagely. “Now, I’m going to let you get out of here. I know Marcus is waiting for you, and I’m going to visit my mother. Hopefully, I’ll see you at church next week,” she said.

  “Oh, you will, no doubt.” Monet nodded her head. “Thank you for everything, Reverend Wilcox.”

  The women hugged one last time, then Reverend Wilcox walked to her office, and Monet walked out of the church to find Marcus. Her heart was light and her step purposeful. Her belief was reinforced that whatever lay ahead, she wasn’t alone. God would be by her side. And she prayed for patience to deal with Marcus better. Sometimes one partner has to step up for the other, and Monet knew she was going to have to climb a lot of stairs.

  Chapter 19

  Hours later, Monet walked into her kitchen after changing out of her church outfit. She took a ceramic bowl from the cabinet, walked to the stove, and ladled spoonfuls of the leftover stew into the bowl. Though she had cooked a traditional Sunday dinner, she had a craving for stew that wouldn’t be denied. She set the bowl on the counter and cut herself a piece of cornbread, put it in the microwave and warmed it. Then she sat at the table, said a prayer, and began eating.

  Duane had come over after church, and Derek joined them afterward. Duane, Derek, and Marcus walked upstairs from the basement and sat in chairs around the kitchen table. They talked about the NBA while waiting for Monet to finish eating.