The Pleasures of Id, Psyche Series: Book One

by Coffy Paige

  She kept her eyes averted, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Honestly, she was so attracted to him. Obviously! But he could tell she was still paralyzed with the fear that he’d be so disgusted by her body he’d go running for the hills.

  The war of emotions on her face told him everything he needed to know. In a whisper he said, “C’mon Maizy. Don’t do this. We’re having a good time.” He read right through her excuse.

  Her voice trembled with pent up emotion, “I have to get up early in the morning.” They sat in silence as she fought back tears and he stared at her with a pensive glare.

  When he finally spoke she looked up at him, “Who was it? Who was it that said you weren’t worthy of happiness?”

  With that she let the first of many tears fall and simply answered, “Me.” He could tell she wanted so much to believe him but the pain of her past ridicules, failed relationships, and who knows what else stilted her. It made him angry to know that she’d been treated so badly because of this shallow world they lived in. “I have to go Mallory.” His eyes darkened and he sat back in his driver’s seat. His gaze went to his steering wheel as she got out of the car and went in her condo. He drove away once she was safely inside.

  Chapter 3

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  From then on he kept a safe but cordial distance from her. He needed to give her time to realize her potential…and he knew just the person for the job to help with that. Someone he knew had his best interests at heart. His sister! She was an exercise instructor and cheerleading coach so she spent a lot of time building up women’s self-confidence. With her newest enterprise of pole dance instructing he was sure Maizy would love it. With Jenny’s help he was able to plant the seed and the rest just took its natural course.

  “Yo! Can I get a spot?” Mallory turns back to his agitated friend.

  “My bad man. I got you.” They go into a comfortable silence yet Mallory’s attention is only half there and the other is on Maizy at the juice bar.

  Cyril breaks the moment with, “Is this your first time dippin’ in the ink?”

  An incredulous look springs to Mallory’s face, “What? No! You know I’ve dated black girls before.”

  “Correction, you’ve dated sistas before. That girl right there, my friend, is from the mother country. That means differences are expounded on from every angle not just race with a woman like that.”

  “Then what about Bowie and Iman?”

  “Touché.” Cyril concedes.

  “That’s not what it’s about to me anyway. I don’t care how exotic she looks.” He stops to take another peak at her gorgeous smile and reciprocates his own with a quirk of his lip, “but it does help.”

  “Ah there you go…” They exchange a friendly chuckle before Cyril goes back to his reps. He finally sits up with an exaggerated breath and a serious tone. “I was just checkin’. Gotta make sure I don’t have to beat your ass if you were trying to just see what it’s like on this side.”

  Cyril’s family was from Zimbabwe so Mallory already knows to what he’s referring. Cyril once explained the stigma that African Americans and Africans face within their culture. The concepts of darker and lighter shades of what they define as black can be confusing. As much as he doesn’t want to say he understands, he actually can. As his Irish ancestry is muddled with their own inconceivable and misguided beliefs is what made his own family seek out something better. Still there seems to be more in the subtext of the statement, “Dude you barely met her and when you did you maybe had a paragraph of dialogue with her.”

  “I talked to her long enough to know she isn’t the regulars that hang around the biz. It’s not just the color of her skin either, if that’s what you’re thinkin’.”

  “It crossed my mind.” Mallory’s brow furrows at what Cyril is saying and about to say.

  Cyril stands to his full 6’5’’ height to address Mallory. “As much as I didn’t agree with your scheme, I was pretty confident that it wouldn’t work either.” He pauses to look at Maizah who now has two different guys trying to get her number. “Even though I’m still not sure how I feel about this whole situation with your sister, and the juice bar girl, it’s obvious it’s working. She’s the triple ‘S’ dude! She’s sexy, sophisticated, and smart and she partly has you to thank for it. All I can say is this…” Mallory straightens and folds his arms over his chest in a defensive stance. He hoped his friend’s next words weren’t anything about how he, himself, wants to date Maizy. “If you don’t make your move again soon, someone’s going to reap the rewards of your hard work.” Cyril gets up to make his way to the octagon in the sparring area of the gym to give Mallory time to contemplate his words. By the dazed look in his friend’s eye he can tell that this Maizah girl really has a hold.

  ~*~*~

  Maizah watches from the juice bar as Mallory walks in the men’s shower laughing with his friend Cyril. She jumps at Jenny’s voice, “So tomorrow’s the big day huh?”

  “What?” She is so out of it she forgets that Jenny is the only other person that knows of her plan for seduction other than Char.

  Jenny gives a questioning stare, “Are you alright?”

  “Yeah…I just have a lot on my mind right now and yes tomorrow is the big day,”

  “I’m so proud of you Maizy! Look at you girl. Fine and fierce as hell, with all the boys panting after you.” Jenny tickles her friend in the cheek to ward off the blush that warms her toffee skin. She points at the come hither stares from some of the male customers. “Don’t back down from it child, embrace it! You worked hard girl!” Maizah snorts as if to say ‘you got that right’. The past four months became an overhaul for her mind and body…

  It started the first day back from the gym after her date with Mallory, which was three days later. She was mortified at her actions on their date and even more embarrassed when all he offered was a polite hello and smile her way. Part of her was glad that she’d scared him off but the other part still wanted to get to know him…in more ways than one. With her raging libido kick started with the class, she was having the hottest fantasies about seducing Mallory. Besides that, he was a really interesting guy. Before her crazy rant and her self-consciousness throughout that night, she was actually having a good time. He wasn’t at all like an arrogant jock he portrays in his fighting persona or TV. He was sweet, smart, hilarious, and worldly. He even knew her family was from Angola! Plus, he did seem like he was really engrossed with her boring stories of her life. And maybe it was the alcohol, the dimly lit atmosphere but she could have sworn he looked like he wanted to jump her bones from time to time.

  All those thoughts were doused thanks to her neurotic mind. And that bitch at the bar that couldn’t keep her comments to herself. After her shower her first day back, she went to her locker and found a flyer. Someone must have stuck it in the vent and the thought annoyed her until she opened it up. It was for private pole dancing lessons! It read something of unleashing the inner sexy while sculpting the outer sexy. The thought of her grinding on some pole with a feather boa around her neck popped in her mind and she laughed. Thinking it was a joke from Jenny, she laughingly tossed the flyer to her. “Nice! Real nice, I needed a laugh.” Maizah plopped down at the bar as Mallory and some friends came rousing by, fresh off the basketball courts. He was obviously skins as he and three others had their shirts off and the other four still had theirs on. She wished she were a molecule in one sweat droplet that seeped from his pours and got to travel the way down that rippled body. Maizah instantly lost her smile and went into shy schoolgirl mode until they were clear of her.

  Jenny was still juicing the hell out of some beets as she scanned the flyer that Maizah dropped to her, “What’s that? Are you going to do pole dancing?”

  “What do you mean ‘what’s that?’ Apparently you think I should do some pole dancing chica!” Maizah started to laugh a bit at her friend’s attempt of keeping her a poker face.

  Jenny eyed her through her
bangs, as her head was still in the flyer, “I seriously have no idea what you’re talking about but if this is something you want to consider I think you’ll love it.”

  “Jenny you for real real? You didn’t put this in my locker?”

  “Naw girl, for play play! Of course I have no idea how that got in your locker.” Jenny went to finish her order for a customer and came back to Maizah. She was looking at the flyer now as if she were really contemplating it. Jenny put her elbows on the counter with a girlish delight, “So! You gonna do it?”

  Just as Maizah was about to give a ‘hell no’, Mallory walked back by with his shirt still off. He flashed her a heart-melting smile and nodded to both of them as he continued on. Maizah looked at the flyer then back at Mallory’s retreating back. Screw it! If he chose to keep moving at optimal speed no need for her to lose ground either. Yeah it was only one date but he could at least say something to her! “You know… I think I will.”

  Jenny didn’t let her back down. She even took her to her first private lesson that very day.. She walked into the studio and the scene was rockabilly burlesque with poles on either side of the room in a row. One main pole was in the middle with Charmaine working a routine to loud rock music. Meeting Charmaine, or Char for short, was intimidating at first. The reddish-raven haired beauty was covered in tattoos and only scraps of black latex and fishnets covered or tried to cover the most unmentionable parts. She didn’t even notice Maizy until specific twirls made her come back down to the ground. Turning off the music she confidently walked over to Maizy with her hand out and a brilliant smile, “You must be Ms. Winston. I’m Charmaine Brixby the owner and instructor of the studio.”

  Maizah takes her hand and tries to reciprocate the smile but the larger than life Glamazon was even more stunning up close. On the pole she looked graceful yet with a deviant-like temptress quality. Up close her face looked All-American gorgeous despite the winding strategically place tattoos all over her body. Maizy was so in awe of the woman she hadn’t noticed she hasn’t said anything yet until Char’s brow rose in anticipation. “Oh! I’m sorry what was that?”

  “I said that you mentioned this is your first time. Have you been curious for a while?”

  “Not really. I’ve heard of it in passing but…” she trailed off because she didn’t want to offend with her next words.

  With a gentle smile Char picked up, “But you didn’t want to seem like a skank for wanting to writhe a pole?” At Maizah’s agape expression Char bursts out laughing and swoops a long arm around her with a shake, “I’m just messin’ with you! I’m a cheerleading coach as well so outside of my current attire I’m still looked at kinda squirrely at times.” She pointed to a vibrantly colored tattoo on her chest. “Let’s just say soccer moms can be a hard sell so I have to keep a good sense of humor and a stiff upper lip? I’m used to it!”

  Maizah joins in with the laughter, “Okay, you’re good!”

  Char led her over to the pole, “What brings you here?”

  “Honestly? A guy.”

  A flash of something crosses Char’s eyes yet she tucks it away before Maizah can react, “Oh so you wana learn a sexy little lap dance for the boyfriend at home.” She wiggled her brows for effect.

  “Not exactly. I want to be confident and sexy at the same time. You know, I’m ready to unleash and sculpt like your flyer said.” She nervously laughed to hide her jitters.

  “I would first suggest that what you do here not be for anyone but you. Don’t let your motivation be some guy.”

  “It’s not so much the guy but what it would stand for to me if I could get his attention back.”

  “Back?”

  “Well we went on one date and…wait a minute. You really are good.” Maizah was just spilling her guts to the woman and it just occurred to her

  “It’s not me. It’s the pole.” She patted the hard surface like a faithful pet and smiled, “Maizah I want you to think of this area as a therapy session. You’re safe here with me.” Being so close to the simplistic metal horizontal line somehow intimidated her. It must have registered on her face because Char spoke on it instantly, “Hey you’re not getting cold feet on me are you?”

  “I’m sorry, I just…I don’t know. Maybe this was too impulsive for me.”

  “Maizah impulses are just wants and this one won’t kill you like heroin will.”

  “Yeah. Wait…what?” Maizah was thoroughly confused.

  “Well drugs are usually an impulse thing. You want to see what it’s about or you want to forget about the world outside for just a bit but the downside is that it’s addicting and it kills you. This…” Char paused to pet the shiny steel, “this is just as addicting. But it won’t kill you. In fact, if you treat it right it may even show you a thing or two about yourself.” Maizy sort of understood but still thought the analogy a little off. She considered her words as she stared at the reflective surface of the bar. “How about this, you don’t even have to touch the pole today. I’ll just answer any questions you have about pole dancing so we can demystify it together, cool?”

  Maizy smiles at the strange woman she’s beginning to like “Cool. First question though, will I have to dress like that?” Maizah smiles to show jest as she points at Char’s state of undress.

  Char reciprocates “Oh honey when your mind catches up with the fact that your body is as sexy as you look you’d be surprised what you’ll want to wear…or not for that matter.” ‘ Sexy’ and ‘Maizah’ were never in the same sentence, except for with Mallory. The fact that a complete stranger was saying the same things cemented her newfound trust with not only a new endeavor but a new friend as well.

  Chapter 4

  Now here she is, the newly confident and strong Maizah Winston. All fine and fierce as Jenny says, and she feels the benefits of it everyday. She barely hears Jenny as she gushes over all her transitions that year. Maizah can barely fathom it most days herself. Besides her career she’s never found anything that’s so liberating and made her feel so damn sexy at the same time. Hell she never thought sexy would be associated with her at all. She loves it so much she’s planning to get certified to do private lessons part time and who knows after her little exhibition earlier. Char became a fast friend and so supportive in everything. She’s even allowing Maizah to come in and help assist the basics class from time to time. After Jenny finishes a drink she comes back over to drill Maizy on her part in the plan. “Okay so…do you know what you’re going to wear? What shoes? What music?”

  “Jeez Jen…Slow down,” Maizy laughs. As comfortable as her job makes her she couldn’t see the sense in buying all of her freak ‘um ingredients from La Perla because it would have cost a small fortune. She chose the Secret that was formally Victoria’s but now is hers for the underneath. “I did everything you said and went to La Perla and Vicky’s and put together a mouthwatering piece. Then I found the most perfect studded heels you told me about…” Maizy stops what she’s saying as she follows Jen’s eyes behind her. It’s Mallory! He has a weird look on his face, as if he’s in pain but he is trying to hide it. When Maizy notices she’s at the register blocking him from ordering she quickly moves, “I’m so sorry Mallory!”

  “Quite alright. Hey Jenny Bo-Benny, what’s shakin?”

  “The change in my pockets but that’s another story, what can I get you? The usual?”

  He nods and Jenny went to work, secretly hating that she can’t see what is about to transpire. The fact that Mallory is so familiar with Jenny when he barely says two words to her irks Maizah. So much so that she narrows her eyes at him without even realizing. The nerves of old her leave and the new her goes to a nearby stool as he looks through his paper. He acts as if she weren’t next to him and that also irks her. “You like to flirt huh Mallory?” What tha-…where did that come from? She doesn’t know but it’s out in the world now and she can’t swallow the words back.

  “Excuse me?” He says with mirth.