by Minkman, Jen
“Hyde Park Picnic Plan: fail,” Gaby muttered, stepping into the lobby with mascara all over her face and strands of black hair stuck to her cheeks. “Shall we just sit down in the lounge and eat our food there?”
The lounge was the common room with computers, the bar and a giant flatscreen for the guests to entertain themselves. Julia and her friends claimed the three sagging sofas in the corner. Once everyone had changed, they unpacked the food and set the table for dinner. Florian was checking the weather forecast on his phone. “Oh, great,” he moped. “It’s sunny and hot in Salzburg, you guys. And here we are, in some fine, English weather.”
“Well, maybe we should have our final picnic outside at my place tomorrow,” Julia replied. “So we can celebrate the final day of our trip with a bit of sunshine.”
“That sounds great,” Moritz said. “My flight gets me back in Salzburg tomorrow afternoon, so I can join you all in the evening.”
Julia sat back, mentally drawing up a list of stuff she’d have to get from the supermarket after getting back home. “Remind me to go to the store tomorrow,” she told Michael, who just handed her a pack of sushi.
He smiled. “Don’t stress it. Don’t think of Salzburg yet – we’re here now.”
“You’re right.” She smiled back, scooting closer to him. He’d said he didn’t want to leave. She wanted to be in the here and the now as well, enjoying her last evening in London with Michael and all of her friends. Once she was back home, she’d have to take care of more stuff than just groceries… the orientation period of the University of Salzburg would soon start. It would be the beginning of a new stage of life for all of them. Michael would move to another city, coming back home at the end of each semester only. Their lives would change, but she didn’t want to think about that. Today was what mattered right now.
15.
The next day, Julia had gone straight to work to set up the picnic at her place. They’d had a calm flight without delays, and before saying goodbye to everybody at the airport, Julia had collected everybody’s contribution for tonight’s food.
Deep in thought, she got off her bike and walked it to the gate when a cheerful voice suddenly woke her up.
“Well, well… what’s that for?”
Julia looked up from the heavy bags she was just unloading from the handlebars, staring straight into Thorsten’s blue eyes. Her neighbor shot an inquisitive look at the grocery bags full of baguettes and snacks.
“Oh, it’s for our post-vacation picnic,” she explained. “Why don’t you join us? We have enough food to feed the entire neighborhood.”
“I believe you,” he chuckled, cracking a grin when Julia tried to pick up all three bags by herself. “Here, let me help you.”
She and Thorsten carried everything to the table outside, where Michael was busying himself making a big bowl of fruit salad. “Hey, thanks for helping Julia, man,” he said when he saw Thorsten carrying two bags. “My stubborn girlfriend insisted she could take care of the groceries all by herself.”
She’d wanted to do it herself because Michael still wasn’t feeling too well after his bout of dizziness in London yesterday. He’d offered to help, but she’d declined because she knew he still felt sick. Making a fruit salad was the least strenuous activity of the day, so she’d asked him to do that and nothing more.
“No problem,” Thorsten replied. “I carry around crates of insanely heavy groceries in the supermarket every day. Julia’s mom is a real dictator of a boss.”
“I heard that,” Ms. Gunther sweetly sang as she stepped into the yard. “I’m cutting your bonus, young man.”
Just as Julia and her mother were done putting all the food on the table, Axel, Gaby and Tamara pulled up to the house in Tamara’s car. “London Calling,” Tamara called to them from the driver’s seat before parking next to the gate. She got out holding a six-pack of duty-free Guinness beer bought at the airport that very morning. Axel and Gaby followed her, carrying bags filled with salt and vinegar chips.
“More food?” Thorsten cried out in mock alarm. “Wow, you guys must be happy I swooped in to help you eat all that.”
“I’m always happy to have you around,” Julia told him with a warm smile. Thorsten glanced sideways, looking like he was about to blush. “Hey, shall I get my guitar?” he suddenly said, sprinting off before she could even say yes.
Julia blinked and turned to Michael standing a few steps away from her, giving her a thoughtful look. Suddenly, she felt like an idiot for saying things like that to Thorsten. She really hadn’t meant for it to sound flirtatious – she’d meant every word – but it had an effect on her neighbor that Michael couldn’t have missed if he’d been miles away. She hoped he wouldn’t be jealous, because there was nothing to be envious about.
She gingerly strolled over to him and leaned in to kiss him on the lips. “I love you,” she whispered against his mouth.
“I love you too,” he mumbled back, staring into her eyes with so much love and tenderness that she wondered if she’d imagined his look of envy before.
When Florian and Moritz completed the party showing up with a large bowl of homemade potato salad, Thorsten showed up again too. After dinner, he played them some well-known songs on his guitar that everybody could sing along to.
“Okay, now play us something soulful,” Tamara requested after they’d all blared the ending of ‘Hey Jude’ at the top of their lungs.
Thorsten looked down at his instrument, tuning the highest strings a little, before launching into the song he’d written himself. He looked up at Julia searchingly. She felt her cheeks flush red, shaking her head almost imperceptibly, but Michael had already nudged her and made her get up from his lap.
“Sing,” he simply said, looking at her expectantly.
Her heart hammered in her throat when Julia sat down next to Thorsten. Damn, she was even more nervous than the time she had to play her own song In front of all her classmates at the graduation ceremony. Why was this so difficult for her? This was her old, familiar group of friends.
Her eyes darted from Michael to Thorsten and back, and it suddenly dawned on her why this was majorly awkward. This was the first time she would sing this song with the two of them together. It was Thorsten’s song, but they were Michael’s lyrics. It was like two worlds colliding, nothing being able to stop their fatal collision course.
”Mein Ruf ist dünn und leicht,” she sang in a bright and gentle voice. “My call, quiet and eerie.” The wind rustled the trees around the house as her voice gained strength and seemed to mesmerize her audience. She sang and poured all of herself into the music. When the song was over, everybody sat and gazed at her in admiration.
Thorsten turned to her and put his hand on her arm. “Thank you,” he quietly said. “That was beautiful.”
She turned red. Last time, he’d thanked her differently. She stared at him with an unspoken question in her eyes. Can we ever be just friends?
His blue eyes seemed to send her a message back. I will always look at you in my own, special way.
Gaby broke the silence by erupting in applause, and the rest followed suit. “Wow, that was amazing!” she said. “Did you write that together?”
Thorsten shrugged shyly. “Kind of.” As everybody started to fire off questions at him about his music, Julia quickly got up and went inside to get a glass of water from the kitchen. When she left the kitchen to go back outside, Gaby was waiting for her in the hallway.
“Jules,” she said. “I don’t think inviting Thorsten was the best idea you’ve had today.”
Julia blinked at her. “Why?”
“Oh, because it’s painfully obvious he’s still in love with you. And because you are a bit too friendly with him. And Michael can clearly see that.”
“Oh.” Julia cringed. “No. You think? But I didn’t mean it like that, Gab. You understand that, right?”
Gaby shrugged reluctantly. “Yeah, kind of. But the question is, do they?”
“I… I don’t know,” Julia said miserably. So she hadn’t imagined Michael’s envy after all. This whole situation sucked. She had to talk to him tonight. Gaby was right – she was being stupid. “I’ll explain it to him. I promise.”
“We’re going to play a game of poker,” Florian announced to Julia and Gaby when they came back to the table. “You girls are in, right?”
“Only if I can be on Axel’s team,” Gaby demanded.
“Naturally, Your Gloomness. Nobody would dare to keep you apart,” Florian replied meekly. Axel slapped his friend on the head, then pulled Gaby onto his lap.
They played for hours. When it got so dark they could no longer properly see the playing cards by the light of the outdoor lanterns, they decided to call it a night and clean up. Julia recruited Gaby and Tamara to bring all the dirty plates to the kitchen, while she gathered all the empty deposit bottles into a plastic bag to dump in the shed. Her mom could take them to work and return them at the supermarket.
She halted when she heard two people talking behind the shed – Michael and Thorsten. Were they talking privately? Nervously, she edged forward and tried to catch what they were saying. She couldn’t quite make out Michael’s voice, but he sounded resolute, whereas Thorsten seemed upset.
“I’m not asking you without reason,” she heard Michael tell her neighbor.
Thorsten exhaled in frustration. “I’m sorry, but seriously? How can you ask that of me? Surely you can see…” His voice wavered. “You know how I feel about her.”
“And that’s why I’m asking you.”
“Excuse me? Look, I know you don’t have to take my feelings into consideration, but…”
“I hope I’ve made myself clear,” Michael interrupted him mid-sentence. When he whipped around and turned the corner, Julia tripped backward and tried to slink away unnoticed, but it was too late. He bumped straight into her.
“Oh, hi,” she babbled nervously, casting around for an excuse to be here. “I, uhm... had to put these bottles in the shed, so...”
His gaze shifted from the bag stuffed with soda bottles to her face screaming guilt. “You saw me talking to Thorsten?” he asked calmly.
She turned red. “Okay, yes. But I didn’t mean to eavesdrop.”
“That’s all right. I had to talk to him to ask him something having to do with you.”
Yes, that had been abundantly clear. Michael had told Thorsten in no uncertain terms to stay away from her. That’s why her neighbor had sounded so distraught. Michael was jealous, and frankly, he had every reason to be.
“I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “I shouldn’t have… you know…”
“I’m not blaming you for anything,” he mumbled.
And then he kissed her. His lips softly explored hers, his hands running up and down her back. The world around them seemed to hold its breath. The wind had died down and the full moon had risen. Overhead, the stars twinkled in the nightly blue of the sky, dappled in red streaks of sunlight at the horizon, where the sun had set. Julia felt his breath on her cheek when he slowly pulled away from their kiss. “I love you with all my heart,” he said.
“And I love you.” Julia smiled. “Why so serious tonight?”
“Well, I just am. I want you to know I mean every word I’m saying.”
They leisurely strolled back to the table holding hands. Their friends were having a last cup of coffee. Thorsten was nowhere to be seen, and Julia knew exactly why. Maybe she should drop by his place tomorrow, just to clear the air.
“We’re leaving in a few minutes,” Tamara said. “Some of us have to work tomorrow.”
Gaby scrunched up her face. “Why-oh-why did I have to sign a two-month contract at the stables? I’ve been to London now. I don’t really need the money anymore.”
“Why don’t you save up for your next break?” Axel suggested. “Maybe we can go somewhere together.”
Gaby’s face lit up. “Definitely! Okay, fine. I’ll muck those damn stables for a few more weeks.” She shot Axel a passionate and longing gaze. Julia couldn’t help looking aside and shooting Michael the same kind of look. In response, he bent over and kissed her softly.
When the coffee was gone, all the guests left. Michael was the last one to leave. Julia waved goodbye to him at the gate when he drove off in his mom’s car honking the horn at her.
She could still feel his lips on her mouth as she climbed the stairs. Humming a tune, she switched on the light in her room and half-heartedly hit a few notes on the keyboard in the corner. The tune she was humming was the song she’d composed just before the London trip – the mournful song she had played on Michael’s piano after their afternoon in the forest. The song she had aptly named Farewell, because it felt as though she was leaving something behind in the melody of that tune.
Julia sat down and started to play it again, the sounds drifting outside through the open window, up into the sky where the pale moon shone, down to the edge of the forest where she had said goodbye to things this summer and learned new lessons. She was on the threshold of a new chapter, and it was time to turn the page in her hand.
At that moment, her mother coughed quietly, standing in Julia’s doorframe. “What a wonderful song, darling,” she observed. “Is it something new?”
Julia looked at her mother thoughtfully, then shook her head. “No, I don’t think so. It feels old. I call it Farewell.”
Ms. Gunther nodded. “I think I understand what you mean.”
Julia smiled. “Good night, Mom.” She got up, switched off her keyboard and prepared for bed. As she drew the curtains and closed her bedroom door, she heard her mother softly singing her song in the hallway. With a satisfied sigh, she crawled under her comforter and read in her scrapbook until her eyelids started to feel heavy. That’s when she turned off the light and invited the dreams in.
16.
A voice woke her from her dream.
Julia sat up in bed with a start. For a second, she thought Anne had called her name, but that couldn’t be – she was staying with their dad in Innsbruck for the week. She looked around her room bathed in cold moonlight. Didn’t she close the curtains before? Or had she forgotten?
And then, she heard it again. A clear voice sounding like tiny bells, seemingly coming out of nowhere. “Come out to the woods.”
A shiver ran down her spine, but it was because of the chilly wind blowing in through the window – the voice didn’t frighten her. It sounded warm and friendly. Julia rubbed her face. Her forehead was slick with sweat. No wonder she had goosebumps all over her body in the wind touching her skin. She got up and walked over to the window to lean outside. There was no one down there who could have called her.
Without thinking too long about it, she got dressed and snuck quietly downstairs so she wouldn’t wake her mom. Julia stepped outside into the yard. The moonlight turned everything to silver, lending the world a fairylike atmosphere. She glanced down the road running past her house, momentarily shrugged, then started to walk in the direction of the forest. Who knows, maybe she had become as sensitive to the woods as Michael had. Maybe the woodland sprites had called her out to dance.
Julia smiled. Good to know she hadn’t turned into a boring, responsible adult just yet. Who in his right and rational mind would take a stroll to the woods in the middle of the night because a mysterious voice had summoned them? Actually, this was kind of exciting – something that could have happened in one of her fairytale books.
Once she got to the forest trail, her feet automatically took her in the direction of her old meditation spot. Her oak stood silently erect amidst the other trees, partly shrouded in shadows. However, the moonlight clearly illuminated a familiar figure standing next to the oak tree. He looked like he’d been waiting for her.
“Michael?” she asked in surprise. “What are you doing here?”
He took a step toward her and softly kissed her cheek. “I want to talk to you.”
“Uhm… here?” She raised an eyebrow.
He nodded solemnly. “Yes, here. This is where it all started.” He took her by the hand and slowly stepped back until they were standing directly under the oak, their faces lit by moonlight seeping through the foliage. Julia held her breath. Michael’s eyes had never looked as vividly green and intensely sad as they did now. His whole face looked different, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on the reason why.
“You heard my voice?” he asked.
“It was you?” She blinked at him. “How could I possibly have heard your voice in my head?”
“Because our connection runs very deep,” he replied. “Because I’ve been hearing your voice in my head for years.”
She shook her head in confusion. “You lost me, sorry.”
His gaze fell down, to his hand touching the tree trunk. “You used to come here to draw, to write, to sing, read or dream. This was your realm. You felt safe here. And I kept you safe – I was the angel that went with you.”
A strange sensation ran through Julia. This was it – Michael was going to tell her more about his sudden attraction to her after the accident. But why wasn’t he making any sense? What had he said exactly… he’d offered her safety under this tree?
“So… uhm… you used to come here too?” she ventured.
He stared into her eyes, even more forlornly than before. “I used to be here.”
Her eyes grew wide with astonishment. She gingerly looked up at the branches of the oak. Her oak.
“What do you mean?” she whispered.
“I guess you could call me a prince of the forest,” he softly replied. “A real prince. An oak tree – an ancient being with a forest life of many centuries, living in connection with all the other creatures of the forest, rooted in soil.”
Her mouth turned dry. “A tree,” she said in a monotone.
“A tree,” he nodded.
