Expecting Miracle Twins

by Barbara Hannay

  A wave of dizziness swept over him, but he knew he couldn’t pull out of this now. He couldn’t wait through another lonely vigil like the one that still haunted him. He couldn’t leave Mattie alone.

  Heaven alone knew what ordeal she faced but, whatever happened now, he had to be with her all the way.

  Swallowing a glut of fear, he nodded to Beth. ‘I want to be with her.’ He felt a small explosion in the middle of his chest. ‘What do I have to do?’

  ‘Hurry!’ Beth shouted as she thrust a green theatre gown into his arms.

  Beneath the bright theatre lights, Mattie felt alone and terrified. She hadn’t expected to see so many gowned people in here—obstetricians, paediatricians, midwives, an anaesthetist. Not one friendly face, and not one of the people she needed most.

  Jake had probably been held up in traffic. Gina and Tom were on their way from Willowbank, but they couldn’t possibly make it in time, and not one of the friendly nurses from the maternity ward was here.

  It might have helped if she’d been dosed with relaxing drugs, but nothing like that had been offered. Now, everything was happening too fast.

  Already, the anaesthetist was asking her to roll over. He wanted to stick a needle into her spine. But it was too soon.

  ‘Could you wait just a minute?’ she muttered, but the anaesthetist took no notice. He rubbed her back with something cold and she felt the prick and sting of a needle. She pictured the anaesthetic sinking into her, spreading to her heart, her arteries, her veins. Soon the entire bottom half of her body would be numb.

  ‘What happens now?’ she asked, but everyone seemed too busy to answer her. Had they forgotten she was here?

  Could someone smile? Please, don’t ignore me.

  The medical team began to erect a green cloth as a screen around her stomach. Mattie’s heart raced. Any minute now the doctor would make his incision. This felt all wrong. It was too clinical. Like an operation. Not a birth.

  Behind her a door crashed open.

  ‘Oh, thank God,’ cried a voice. ‘We’re not too late.’

  Mattie turned her head and saw Beth’s friendly face. And there was Jake!

  Oh, gosh. Oh, wow! He looked wonderful. Familiar and yet strangely alien in a hospital cap and gown.

  ‘Who’s this?’ Dr Smith, the obstetrician, looked up from whatever he was doing and fixed Jake with a steely stare.

  Jake’s face was unusually pale as he snapped to attention and took a step forward. ‘I have to be with Mattie.’

  ‘He’s her boyfriend,’ Beth announced and then she made a hasty amendment. ‘Her partner.’

  Dr Smith’s grey eyes looked surprised but Jake was already standing at Mattie’s right shoulder and he reached down and clasped her hand. ‘I’m…I’m the surrogate father,’ he said.

  Several masked faces turned to look at Jake, amusement dancing in their eyes, but the doctor simply nodded, businesslike once more, as he turned his attention to Mattie’s abdomen.

  Mattie looked up into Jake’s face and saw his heart shining in his eyes. She tried to speak, but a thousand emotions rose to fill her throat and she could only manage a strangled sob.

  He smiled with aching tenderness as he bent down to her. ‘Hi there.’

  ‘Hey.’

  He squeezed her hand. ‘Just keep smiling, sweetheart.’

  She was smiling straight into his eyes when she felt the cutting sensation on the other side of the screen. A flash of fear sliced through her, but Jake dipped his head and she felt the reassuring warmth of his lips on her brow.

  There was a pulling sensation somewhere in her middle and suddenly a voice cried in triumph, ‘It’s a boy.’

  Gloved hands held a baby high and Mattie saw his gleaming creamy skin, his perfect limbs and his little scrunched face, capped by dark, unmistakably red hair.

  Her face broke into a broad grin. ‘Oh, the little darling. He looks exactly like Tom.’

  She heard Jake’s abrupt laugh—half excited, half scared—and felt his hand gripping hers more tightly.

  Already, another doctor was pulling out the little girl but, before Mattie could see her properly, she was whisked away.

  ‘What’s the matter?’ Mattie called after them fearfully.

  ‘Don’t worry. She’ll be all right,’ Beth hastened to reassure them. ‘She just needs resuscitation.’

  ‘Can’t she breathe?’ Jake’s voice was raspy and rough, as if he was scared too.

  ‘She’ll breathe. But there was always a chance the smaller baby would need help. It’s why Dr Smith insisted on a Caesarean.’

  ‘Are you sure she’s OK?’

  Beth patted Mattie’s shoulder. ‘I’m sure, honey, but I’ll go and check for you. Be right back.’

  It was all over.

  Mattie’s incision had been repaired. She’d been reassured that the baby girl was fine, although she needed careful monitoring and would stay in an incubator for the next twenty-four hours.

  Jake had been outside, making the necessary phone calls, and now there wasn’t a lot for him to do as he followed Mattie out of Theatre and into Recovery, where a male nurse hovered over her, watching her intently and taking her blood pressure every few seconds.

  Or so it seemed.

  Mattie looked bright and happy as she held up her end of the conversation with the nurse. It was Jake who was completely lost.

  He felt dazed, like the time he’d been thrown from a horse and found himself on the hard ground, totally winded and looking at the world upside down.

  It was so hard to believe he’d actually witnessed the successful birth of two brand-new tiny human beings.

  They’d survived. Mattie had survived. None of his fears had been realised. He should be feeling euphoric.

  Instead, he still felt tense. The excitement was over and the babies had vanished into some distant nursery where perhaps, even now, they were being met by their parents. This was it—the moment when Mattie had to face the fact that she was alone.

  Lost? Needing him?

  Yeah, sure. Right now she was chatting happily to the male nurse who apparently needed to know every last medical detail of her surrogacy. Jake watched her cheerful smile and the way she waved her expressive hands as she talked animatedly to this other guy and his tension grew claws, took a stranglehold.

  He needed to be alone with her. There was so much he wanted to tell her, but he might as well grab a coffee, visit Roy, do anything rather than hang around here like a fifth wheel.

  He took a step towards the trolley. ‘Mattie?’

  She stopped in mid-sentence and turned. Her eyes were shining. ‘Hi, Jake,’ she said as if she’d just remembered his presence.

  ‘I thought I might push off now.’

  ‘Oh.’ The word fell from her lips softly and a flood of pink rushed into her cheeks. She looked worried, held out her hand to him. ‘But I haven’t thanked you.’

  ‘I haven’t done anything.’

  ‘You have. You came. You were here.’ The glow in her eyes took on a damp sheen. Her lower lip trembled. ‘You were perfect. All along you’ve been perfect.’ She spoke as if the nurse wasn’t there listening to every word. ‘And I’ve made so many terrible mistakes.’

  Jake was sure he’d swallowed a golf ball. Mistakes? What was she talking about?

  Beside them, the nurse cleared his throat and Mattie shot him a cool glance. ‘Could you give us a moment, please, Ben?’

  ‘I’m supposed to observe you.’

  ‘I know, but this is important. Just for a moment.’

  Ben gave a doubtful shrug. ‘I’ll just be outside, then.’

  ‘Thanks.’

  As soon as he’d gone Mattie took both of Jake’s hands in hers. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes too shiny and she was trembling.

  ‘What’s the matter?’ Jake whispered. ‘Should I call the nurse back?’

  ‘No. I’m all right. It’s just…I’m scared.’

  ‘About the babies? They said the li
ttle girl’s fine.’

  She shook her head. ‘Not that.’ She spoke softly and he could barely make out the words. ‘I want to apologise.’

  This didn’t make sense. ‘Mattie, what are you talking about?’

  She closed her eyes and took a deep shuddering breath. ‘I didn’t want to get too close to another man.’

  ‘I understand, Mattie. It’s OK.’

  ‘But I need to explain why I stopped answering your e-mails. I was afraid of getting involved, then getting hurt again, and then I didn’t tell you about the babies and of course you got a shock—and I turned you away. But, in spite of everything, you’ve been so good to me and—’

  Tears trembled on her lashes. ‘I’m sorry.’

  ‘Sorry?’ He was at once panicky and wanting to dance on air. ‘I should be the one to apologise. I’m ashamed of the way I carried on about the surrogacy, but I was dealing with a terrible fear about what might happen.’

  ‘Because of your mother’s complications?’

  He realised then that the ghost had been laid to rest and he could actually talk about it. ‘My baby brother was stillborn, you see. I was only nine years old and my mother was ill and I…I saw him. I held him.’

  ‘Oh, Jake, you poor darling.’ Mattie touched his cheek in the gentlest of caresses. ‘It must have been incredibly hard for you to come here today.’

  ‘I’m on top of the world now.’ He smiled shakily. ‘You’ve given your friends the most amazing gift. You’re the most wonderful girl.’

  She raised her face and looked gravely into his eyes. ‘But I’m not the girl you met.’

  A bubble of laughter burst in Jake’s throat. ‘I’m not the man you met.’ He lifted her hand and pressed his lips to her fingers. ‘The babies aren’t the only ones who’ve grown over the past eight months. I feel like I’m twice the man I was. I’ve learned so much from you.’

  At first she didn’t respond, but then a small smile played at the corners of her mouth.

  ‘I love you, Mattie.’

  How good it felt to say those words out loud. Finally they sounded real. They were real.

  They made her smile.

  Such a beautiful, shining, radiant smile.

  He covered her hands with his and felt his confidence grow. ‘I’ve…er…heard you’re on the lookout for a new mission now.’

  ‘Oh, yes. I did say that.’

  ‘I was wondering if you might take me on.’

  Her eyes widened.

  ‘As an ongoing project,’ he clarified.

  ‘As a boyfriend?’

  Jake nodded.

  ‘Are you talking long term?’

  He didn’t miss a beat. ‘Very long term.’

  ‘Not forever, Jake?’

  He smiled. ‘Why not?’

  A cough sounded behind them. ‘OK,’ Ben said. ‘I hate to break up the party, but—’

  Jake held up his hand. ‘Please, mate, give us one more minute.’

  ‘I really need to take Mattie’s blood pressure now. And then she’s all yours.’

  ‘Can’t you take her blood pressure after I ask her to marry me?’

  To Jake’s relief, the other guy’s face broke into a grin.

  ‘Make it quick,’ Ben said, still grinning as he backed out of the room.

  Jake turned to Mattie. Her eyes were shining. She was so beautiful.

  ‘I love you, Mattie,’ he said again, leaning close so only she could hear. ‘I need you in my life.’

  She smiled.

  ‘I need you as my wife. I promise I won’t let you down. I want to keep you close for ever.’

  Her smile broadened to a grin. ‘That’s exactly where I want to be.’

  They were back in Mattie’s room when Gina and Tom arrived, their arms filled with flowers and their faces split by enormous grins.

  ‘Mattie,’ Gina cried, rushing to hug her. ‘The babies are so, so gorgeous. Thank you, darling. Thank you. Thank you. I’m afraid I can never really thank you enough.’

  The next few minutes were very noisy and busy as everyone spoke at once about the birth and the babies.

  ‘We’re really excited about you two,’ said Tom and he pumped Jake’s hand and slapped him on the back. Then, before Mattie could question Tom, the ecstatic new parents left, hurrying back to the nursery.

  Mattie looked at Jake. His hair was untidy, he hadn’t shaved and his shirt was in need of an iron. He looked a little scruffy, just as he had on the day she’d first seen him, and she felt a delicious pang of longing.

  Suddenly Gina was back. ‘I almost forgot. This is for you.’ She pressed a white envelope into Mattie’s hand. ‘As an extra thank you.’ She winked and was gone.

  Mattie looked at Jake. ‘I hope they haven’t been terribly extravagant. They’ve already given me so much.’

  ‘Not half as much as you’ve given them,’ he said with a quiet smile.

  She opened the envelope and found a lovely thank-you card and a slip of paper. ‘Oh, my goodness.’ She gave a shocked little laugh. ‘It’s a voucher for a holiday.’

  Jake grinned. ‘Exactly what you need.’

  ‘It’s for two, Jake. A room and meals for two at a resort on Daydream Island.’

  His grin deepened. ‘Even better.’

  ‘But how did Gina and Tom know?’ Puzzlement vied with excitement at she pictured a holiday on a tropical island with her gorgeous pirate. ‘How did they know about you? About us?’

  ‘Will probably told them.’

  ‘Will?’ Mattie’s jaw dropped. Now she was completely baffled. ‘How does he fit into this?’

  With a sheepish smile, Jake sat on the edge of her bed. ‘While they were stitching you up, I ducked outside to make phone calls. I rang Roy. He sends his love, by the way. And I rang Will and told him about the babies.’

  ‘But you didn’t tell him about us, did you? You hadn’t—we hadn’t—’

  A dark tide stained Jake’s neck. ‘And I asked Will if he’d—’ He pressed his lips together and looked incredibly guilty. ‘I told him that if all went well, I was going to need him some time in the next couple of months.’

  ‘What for?’

  ‘To be best man at our wedding.’

  Mattie gasped.

  ‘And then Will must have rung Gina and Tom,’ Jake said. ‘I’m sorry. Are you mad?’

  She shook her head. How could she be mad? ‘Will is the perfect choice,’ she said. Everything in her life was perfect.

  ‘You look tired,’ Jake suggested, dropping a light kiss on her brow.

  She was tired. Tired and a bit sore, now that the anaesthetic was wearing off, but so happy she didn’t care about any of the discomfort.

  ‘Stay with me?’ She patted the bed beside her.

  With a slow smile, Jake slipped off his shoes and stretched beside her. His arms encircled her and happiness flowed through her as he gently kissed the curve of her neck.

  ‘Close your eyes,’ he whispered.

  She did as she was told and let the tiredness wash through her. ‘I love you,’ she told him.

  ‘I love you too.’ He nuzzled her ear. ‘And I’m going to keep on loving you. For ever.’

  Mattie sighed happily and she felt Jake’s warmth surround her, felt his heartbeat strong and steady against her, and she fell asleep with a smile on her face.

  EPILOGUE

  WELCOME to Willowbank.

  The white-painted sign stood proudly in a bed of blue and white agapanthus on the outskirts of town.

  ‘Ta-da! This is my home town.’ Mattie grinned at Jake. ‘Not exactly a bustling metropolis.’

  She drove on down the wide main street, divided in the middle by a strip of well-tended lawn with willow trees and brightly coloured garden beds. Either side of the street, rows of old-fashioned timber buildings housed a mix of traditional shops and trendy new fashion stores and cafés.

  ‘I like it,’ Jake said.

  Mattie shot him a sideways glance. ‘You don’t have to be po
lite.’

  ‘No, I mean it. There’s something special about being in the bush. And this is the quintessential Australian country town.’

  ‘Complete with the quintessential clock tower right in the middle.’ Mattie laughed, pointing.

  Jake grinned. ‘And the quintessential old-timers, passing the time of day on a seat in the sun.’

  ‘There’s my old primary school,’ she said as they passed a playground filled with yelling, laughing children.

  ‘And the School of Arts where you stood on stage to recite The Man from Snowy River.’

  ‘How did you know?’

  ‘I went to a country primary school too, you know.’

  ‘Of course you did.’

  They shared a smile and Mattie felt the tummy-tumbling happiness that she always felt when Jake gave her a certain look.

  They were on their way to Gina and Tom’s for lunch. This evening they would stay with her parents and they would discuss wedding plans. It was all incredibly exciting.

  ‘Slow down,’ Jake said as they left the main part of town and drove past houses on acreage.

  Mattie slowed and felt a catch in her throat when she saw the For Sale that had caught his attention.

  ‘That’s the McLaughlins’ place,’ she said, excited by the eager intensity in Jake’s face. ‘I heard they were retiring to the Gold Coast.’

  ‘Do you know the house? Have you been inside?’

  ‘Years ago. In primary school I was friends with their daughter, but I lost touch when she went away to boarding school. As I remember, it’s a lovely old house.’

  From the street, they could see a graceful federation-style home, set well back from the road and fronted by attractive gardens. Stately old gum trees shaded the lawn and a row of liquid ambers provided a screen from the neighbours.

  ‘The land runs down to the river,’ Mattie said. ‘And there’s a little jetty.’

  ‘It’s perfect,’ Jake announced as if he’d already made a decision.

  ‘Do you mean you’d like to live here?’

  He smiled. ‘Possibly.’ Reaching out, he traced the outline of her ear with a fingertip. ‘What do you think? Should we come back tomorrow and check it out?’