Breaking Faith (The JackholeS Book 1)

by Joy Eileen

  Chapter 7

  Fuck, I had it bad. Why did I want him? He was a total man slut, and even though last night was the first time I heard them play, I knew of the JackholeS notorious whore of a lead singer.

  Just thinking about watching Kill onstage, as he looked into the crowd of horny women, certain most of them knew exactly what he was like in bed, made my insides crawl.

  I needed a lobotomy. My choices in men were appalling. Since that would never change, I elected to make a different decision: to finish school and abstain from men altogether. Feeling powerful from my affirmation, I got out of my car and walked to the back entrance where Jessie waited for me.

  I smiled at her, trying my hardest to stop myself from picturing Kill’s gorgeous face as he ran his hands through my hair.

  Damn him.

  “Hey sexy, you ready for your first day?”

  “Yeah, I think I am.”

  “Have you called Ginger to let her know you aren’t coming back in?” Jessie asked as we walked to the breakroom. She handed me my new uniform, which was a tight black T-shirt with Ray’s written across it in a deep red, and a black apron.

  I knew Ginger deserved a two week notice, but she adored Jason and I didn’t want to explain anything to her. So if that meant leaving her high and dry by leaving her a message tomorrow during the shop's peak hours, that's exactly what I would do.

  “No, I had three days off. I should start back tomorrow. I'm going to take the coward’s way out and leave her a message."

  Jessie came over and touched my arms, careful not to place her hands on my bruises. “You're not a coward, Faith. You did something very brave by getting away from Jason. I know how Ginger loves him, and I understand your need to get away. Don’t let him take your power away from you. It's your life and you're going to live it by making your own decisions; if anyone doesn’t like it they can answer to me.”

  Jessie’s eyes were on fire, and I had no doubt she would hurt anyone who decided to question me.

  “You’re hot when you're on your soap box.”

  Jessie smacked me, but laughed, making me feel like I might get through this. “Hurry up, and get dressed,” she said, pointing to my locker. “This is your locker number.” She handed me a slip of paper with the combination on it. I ran into the bathroom, throwing on my new uniform.

  The crowd was sparse, as Jessie introduced me to the other two waitresses. The older waitress I took the shot from the other night was Denise. She gave me a big hug, telling me if I needed anything to let her know.

  The other waitress was around our age, with a huge chip on her shoulder, and if she didn’t get it removed soon, it would leave her buried in chiropractic bills. Her name was Bambi. Yes, Bambi. I had to ask if I'd heard it right when Jessie introduced her.

  Bambi was beautiful in a bitchy sort of way. She was thin with huge aftermarket boobs, making her look even tinier. Her blond hair fell down past her bra line, and her face was done up like she was going clubbing.

  As we walked away from Bambi, Jessie whispered in my ear, “She's a witch, watch out for her.”

  I nodded at her, letting her know I had already figured that out.

  “Ryan, this is our new waitress, Faith,” Jessie announced when we reached the bar.

  Ryan put her hand out so I could shake it, and I noticed just how incredibly beautiful she was. “You were awesome last night. I'm so glad Ray hired you. If I had to deal with one more pathetically incompetent girl, I was going to lose my shit. Now if Ray would get rid of Bambi, my life would be peachy fucking keen.”

  I laughed, we were going to get along fine. Jessie walked me around the bar, showing me the tables and introducing me to the regulars.

  There were a lot of women waiting to see if they would be the lucky one a Jackhole would pick to warm their beds. A sea of push up bras were scattered throughout the bar; some of the poor things were trying to perform resurrections.

  My stomach turned thinking about one of them going home with Kill, but I didn’t let myself dwell on it. Instead, I put my attention into learning the ropes of Ray’s.

  With the exception of a couple of creepers, everyone seemed nice. After an hour of getting familiar with the regulars and making sure everyone had their drinks, a bell rang. Everyone turned toward the commotion.

  I hadn’t noticed the big brass bell the night before, but with Jet clanging it, everyone knew of its existence.

  “We have arrived; you’re fucking welcome.” Jet made his way toward the table they were at last night. Van walked in next, shaking his head at Jet. D was staring down at his phone, tapping away on it. He was oblivious to the sighs that escaped some of the women’s lips upon seeing him.

  Kill came in last and scanned the bar when he entered. When he landed on me, he stopped. Everything faded away as our eyes stayed locked on each other.

  Nobody noticed our exchange as they were all too busy trying to pose themselves in the best position to get his attention. When he turned and followed the band, I had a small smile playing on my lips. I'd I received the attention most of the women in the bar were dying for.

  Spinning around in a daze, I ran into one of the creepers I had been avoiding.

  “Hey sweetheart, you look lost.” He leaned in, and I could smell the stale beer on his hot breath.

  I tried to push him away, but he had a firm grasp on both of my upper arms, where he reached out to stabilize me when I stumbled into him. I winced as he pressed into the bruises on my arms.

  It figured the jerk would have the same size hands as Jason. It must be the universal dickhead size assigned when an asshole received his personality.

  “Yep, you can let go now,” I said, trying again to get away.

  This time he moved easily away from me. I blinked, wondering if I had one of those adrenaline bursts, you hear about when a woman has the ability to lift a car off her child. I saw it wasn’t my super strength, but Kill standing in all of his angry glory, holding the creeper by his shirt collar.

  “Don’t touch her again,” he growled. Everyone in the bar watched and waited to see what would happen next.

  “Hey man, she threw herself at me. I’m sure you know how it is when they can’t stay away from your cock,” the creeper said, now demoting himself to dumbass.

  He obviously didn't care about the bodily harm promised in Kill’s eyes. A huge bald man wearing a Ray’s t-shirt with the word bouncer printed on it, came over and took the dumbass out of Kill’s hands, saving him from the beating of his life.

  “I've got him from here, Kill,” the bouncer announced.

  Kill transferred his fury-filled gaze toward me.

  “I had it!” I said, upset he was acting like I did it on purpose.

  “Catcher, this is Faith, the new waitress. I'm sure you will get to know her soon; she has the ability to attract trouble,” he seethed.

  Catcher smiled as he shifted the dumbass over, so he was holding him in one hand, and he held out the other for me to shake. I was amazed to see my hand become engulfed by his ginormous paw.

  “Nice to meet you, Faith. I heard about your ex last night. I was at the other side of bar, stopping a fight. I promise to keep a better eye out for him. Sorry about that.” He gave me a wink, his face filled with sincerity, before picking up the dumbass and heading toward the door.

  I turned to give Kill a piece of my mind, and was faced with his muscular back walking away, and damn if his ass wasn’t edible, just like the rest of him. “Dick,” I muttered under my breath, and went to the bar.

  “Hey, sexy bitch, how are you holding up?” Ryan asked.

  “Good,” I replied as I gave her my orders. I had embarked on my own. Jessie excused my shadowing her earlier, deeming me ready to venture out with the customers.

  My eyes swept over to Kill. His face was tight with irritation. D was talking to him, but he just stared at the table.

  “You're a liar,” Ryan replied, as I turned back around to see her scrutinizing me.
r />   “Well, it's better now that the creeper has been escorted out.” My fake smile was itching to bloom.

  “I thought Kill was going to beat that idiot. I've never seen him get so angry before.”

  “Hey, sugar, are you ok?” Denise asked as Jessie put her arm around my waist.

  “I’m fine. Believe me, I've dealt with bigger assholes.”

  Denise’s eyes skimmed my bruised arms, before looking away.

  “Catcher will take care of you. I should've introduced you to him first. Sorry, Faith, I wasn’t thinking,” Jessie said with her head on my shoulder.

  “Enough! I'm fine. Kill had him off me before I had a chance to worry.”

  “That was kind of hot,” Denise sighed, and Ryan nodded her head in agreement.

  “And what's this thing between you and Van?” Ryan asked Jessie, causing her to blush.

  “I don’t know what you're talking about.”

  “All I can say is, it's about damn time. I was getting sick of you two eye-fucking each other across the room every night,” Denise replied, leaving before any of us could respond.

  Jessie sputtered, staring at her retreating back. I laughed so hard I had to lean on the bar for support. “Shut up,” Jessie grumbled.

  I went to grab my drink orders for the gaming area, but Jessie stopped me. “Why don’t you go give the boys their drinks? I'll deliver these for you,” she said, taking my full tray.

  “I don’t need you to baby me, Jessie. I'm fine.”

  “Shut the fuck up,” she said with a straight face and sauntered off.

  My mouth hung open from hearing my little southern belle tell me to shut the fuck up, without even flinching, and damned if it didn’t make me proud.

  “Shit, we're corrupting her. They grow up so fast,” Ryan said, wiping a pretend tear off of her cheek.

  Jet saw me first, giving me a huge smile. “Hey, sexy, you want to come home to my house tonight?” he said, wiggling his eyebrow.

  Kill glowered at me, causing me to roll my eyes at him. “Are you always so damn pissy?” I asked him when I sat the last beer in front of him.

  The Kill who had ran his fingers through my hair had vanished.

  “Actually no, my attitude only comes out when you're near.”

  The pain that shot through me from his harsh words caused me to inhale sharply. I shook my head, embarrassed at my reaction.

  “Don’t worry, Killer, I promise to stay away from you while I work here. I will come get my stuff tomorrow. You’re welcome. I just fixed your attitude,” I whispered in his ear.

  Someone called me from across the bar, and I hurried away. Kill tried to stop me, but in an expert move, I dodged him.

  I questioned if all his flirting and touching was just a way to scare me off, so I wouldn’t stay at their house. How stupid was I?

  Instead of letting his overly sexual touches scare me off, it did the opposite, turning me on to the point where I foresaw my fingers getting a vigorous work out later.

  But why he was so sweet to me on the couch? Maybe he thought I would be afraid of him and his invasion in my personal space, being I just got out of an abusive relationship.

  Like any normal person in my situation, I should have been shying away from males instead of throwing myself at them. So much for being on the right track and piecing myself together.

  In a fog, I obsessed over every minute detail that had happened today. I jumped when the band started their set; I hadn’t even heard them get onstage.

  The whole bar was screaming, competing over who loved the band more. Kill talked to the crowd, getting them even more revved up, while the rest of the band got situated.

  They started with a song they had sung last night. I stopped for a moment; he really was amazing. The way he commanded the stage, making each person feel as though he had some intimate connection with them, was inspiring. I recoiled, thinking he probably did have an intimate connection with most of the females in the crowd.

  They seamlessly merged into the next song. It must have been a fan favorite, being the whole bar sang along. Ugh, did he have to be so good? I thought, singing the song in my head with everyone else.

  The charisma Kill had onstage was going to take them far, yet another reason I needed to stay away. When they took a break, some of the braver women attempted to talk to them. The band flirted right back. A couple women tried to sit on their laps, but they turned them down so smoothly they didn’t even know it happened.

  Kill caught me staring and came toward me. I busied myself with my tables, not ready to talk to him. My traitorous body tingled at his proximity. I put on a bland face and turned toward him. His face was ignited with annoyance, and it made me even hotter. Yeah, I know I'm all kinds of fucked up.

  “We need to talk,” he said through gritted teeth.

  The couple I was serving seemed surprised to see Kill at their table. I took a shot at fleeing. I didn’t get very far before his fingers encircled my wrist, and electricity zipped up my arm settling deep in my lower abdomen.

  He walked me toward the breakroom, and all I could do was try to keep up with him. Once we made it to our destination, he let go of my wrist and twirled me around.

  “What the hell, Kill? You don’t get to just manhandle me,” I yelled, matching his anger. My emotions had run the gambit these past couple of days. I was exhausted and done with everything.

  “You can’t just say you're going to come get your stuff without explaining why.”

  We were now toe to toe, fuming at each other. “What, did you talk to that dickhead? Did you forgive him already? I was sure you would last a week before caving in.”

  I rubbed my temples, as my headache roared back to life. I finally got it; he saw me as some pathetic girl who would go back to her abuser in time. He had no respect for me, which I understood. I had no respect for myself. I lowered my hands, as the effort proved to be useless, my headache was now in full force.

  Pulling together all the pride I feasibly could, I told myself I could cry later tonight. Knowing there was nothing I could tell him to get him to change his opinion, I turned on my beautiful heels and walked away. I thought I heard him whisper my name, but I was sure it was just my imagination.

  The band finished their second set, doing an amazing job, and I thought to myself again, they wouldn’t be playing this small bar much longer.

  After last call, Jessie and Denise taught me how to shut down the bar. Every time my eyes wandered over to the boys' table, on their own accord, Kill was staring at me with his fathomless green eyes burning with emotion.

  Ray called me into his office and asked me how my first day went. With the look he shot me, I knew he heard about the creeper incident. I explained, between Kill and Catcher, I couldn’t have been safer. Ray cautioned me to be careful and to let Catcher know if anyone else bothered me. Jessie was waiting for me by our lockers when I was dismissed.

  “Are you going to stay with Van tonight?” I asked.

  Her face flushed. “He's coming over to my place tonight," she squealed, "I just wish he wasn’t a drummer. He went home, to change. I know he won’t be around long, but I'm just living in the moment. By the way, Kill asked me if you wanted them to wait so one of them could ride with you, but I told him you were fine.”

  I was grateful Kill didn't mention my moving out. I didn't want Jessie to worry, especially when she seemed so happy.

  “Yep, I'm headed there now. Love you, ‘night.” We hugged goodnight and I climbed in my car. I circled around the block, before pulling back into the Ray's parking lot.

  Yanking on my hoodie, I loved it could make me feel snug and secure. I was surprised when I found it clean and folded, on my passenger seat. Thankfully, my laptop was hidden under my seat. While my computer booted up, I leaned my head on the seat.

  Guilt clawed at me for lying to Jessie, and I was sure I would catch hell when she found out. I must have drifted off because I was jolted awake to a banging on my window. Looking u
p through sleepy eyes, I caught Kill glaring at me. His jaw ticked, and his dimple kept appearing and vanishing from his cheek.

  I sighed, no longer able to avoid him, yet longing for a couple more hours of sleep before I had to deal with him. Leaning over, I unlocked the passenger door, nodding with my head for him to get in if he wanted to talk. I moved my computer to the backseat while he got situated.

  He stared straight ahead, and I was at a loss on how to start. He finally looked at me. “Ray called. He has cameras back here and was worried when he saw you.”

  My stupid heart dropped. He wasn’t worried about me; he was helping a friend get rid of unwanted loiterers.

  “Sorry, I was looking for a hotel room. I must have fallen asleep,” I said, wanting to get this over with, and him out of my car as soon as possible. The tiny space was allowing his scent to drift over me, warming me even more than my hoodie. He smelled clean, and his hair was wet from the shower he must have taken.

  “You weren’t going back to him?”

  “No, asshole. I already told you I wasn’t. I figured I'd give it another week,” I retorted, throwing his words back in his face.

  “Come home.” His eyes pleaded with me to comply, and I was close to agreeing.

  “No, I know you think I'm this pathetic girl, but I don’t need you or your charity. I left him, and I'll make it by myself.” The tears threatening to fall, broke free, and I was too tired to stop them.

  He brushed a tear from my cheeks. The gentle brush of his finger caused my heart to break for what could never be. “I don’t think you’re pathetic,” he replied, leaning back on the seat. “I had a friend, Melissa.” The way he said her name, made my throat clog up.

  “She was in a relationship like yours. With my help she left him. Two weeks later she was gone; just packed up without telling me. She went back to him.”

  The anguish in his voice caused more tears to fall from my eyes.

  “She fell down the stairs and broke her neck, killing her instantly. Her boyfriend swore he wasn't around when it happened. His dad was high up on the police force, and the questioning never went any further than his first statement. She told me the night she left him he threatened to kill her by throwing her down the stairs.”