by Amy DeMeritt
“Hey, sweetie. How are you feeling?”
“I’m alive, so I’m fantastic. I love you, Mom.” She starts to cry again and bends down to kiss me on my forehead. “I love you too, dear. Since they’re going to be running tests all day and we won’t be allowed back with you, we’re going to leave, but I’ll be back later.”
I nod and I’m surprised when my father does not step forward to say goodbye. I look at him with narrowed eyes and he turns pale like he’s seen a ghost. I roll my eyes and look at Callie. She’s also looking at my father, but she’s wearing a murderous look.
“Callie.” She turns to look at me and her scowl is quickly replaced with a smile. “Hey, Pixie.”
“Did you buy me a new mattress while I was out?” She laughs and nods. “I slept at your place a few nights a week to keep an eye on it for you. After the second night of sleeping on that horrible mattress, I had to toss it.”
“Thanks. Did you describe Alex’s eyes as ‘mermaid princess eyes’?” She laughs hard. “Damn, Pixie. How much did you hear in there?” She glances at my dad and he walks to the door and stands there nervous and awkward before walking out. “I’m sure not everything. Hey, you uh didn’t get yourself in trouble trying to hunt Tina down, did you?” She shakes her head. “I did try to find her, but I stopped looking because I knew you wouldn’t want me to do what I really want to do to her.”
“Good. Now, go eat a couple cheeseburgers; you’re looking too skinny and frail.” Callie laughs hard and bends down giving me a hug. “I missed you. I’ll be back later.”
After they leave, Alex gently presses her hand to my cheek like I have felt on so many occasions and I smile. She smiles back at me and gently caresses my cheek and my ear. “I love you, Jordan.” My smile spreads so wide it takes up my entire face. It takes a great deal of effort, but I lift my arm to press my hand against hers, making her eyes get big and her smile to widen. “I love you too, Alex.”
“I can’t believe how much control you have already. Most people that come out of a coma aren’t able to talk well, if at all, or move around like you. It usually takes a lot of time and therapy to do what you are doing. Some people never regain control over speech or certain movements. You’ll still probably need plenty of therapy though.” I smile and squeeze her hand. “Will you still be my nurse for a while longer then?” She laughs. “Hopefully, but even if I’m not, I’ll come see you every day.”
“When I get out of here, do you want to go to Hong Kong with me?” She lets out a small excited laugh. “Oh my god, yes!”
“Pardon the interruption. Jordan, I am Dr. Hamlin, this is Dr. Sharif, and this is Daria, your physical therapist. We are all very excited that you were able to come out your coma and we will try to make your recovery as painless as possible. When possible though, we need you to tell us of any discomfort or difficulty you are having, no matter how small it may seem. Daria is going to instruct you on some different movements and we are going to observe your control and ability to take direction. This will help us to know how to proceed from here in helping you. Ok?”
“Ok. It’s nice to meet you all.” They all smile warmly and the two doctors make a couple notes on clipboards they’re holding. Dr. Hamlin appears to be middle age, African-American, wears thin rimmed oval glasses and has kind eyes. Dr. Sharif looks very young, possibly right out of medical school, is Middle Eastern and has a look on his face like a scientist that is observing a rare creature or a viscous material forming chemical reaction. Daria is a broad shouldered white woman with kinky black curls pulled into a ponytail, and has an impatient face. She reminds me of my boxing coach. I sure hope she’s not going to be like my boxing coach through this therapy though.
“Jordan, I’m just going to call out instructions and I want you to try to follow them. If you’re not able to do something, just say, ‘can’t’. First, you’ll need to let go of your nurse’s hand.”
I frown and look at Alex. She tries to let go of my hand, but I hold on tight. She smiles and gently places her other hand on my arm. “I’ll be right here, Jordan. I’m not going anywhere.” I slowly let go of her hand and she takes one step back.
“Tell me your full name and age, please.”
“Jordan Marie Santone. I’m twenty-seven.”
“Drum your fingers on your bed with your left hand.” I follow her instruction. “Good, now the right.” I repeat the movement with my right hand. “Now, both at once.” After I easily perform the task, she nods.
She lifts the blankets off my feet and I smile seeing my feet are well groomed like I’ve been given a pedicure. “Left foot, wiggle your toes. Good, now the right. And together. Good. Now, lift your right arm a few inches off the bed.” I watch her smile and notice my doctors quickly write down notes as I lift my arm, with a little difficulty, straight up in the air, much higher than she requested. “Sorry, I can take directions, but I wanted to show off.” They all laugh and I repeat the test with the left arm.
“Try to lift your head off your pillow, but not your shoulders.” I lift my head and she nods hers. “You’re doing excellent, Jordan. Can you try to slide your right foot back bending your knee into the air?” I try to follow her instruction, but my leg muscles feel too weak. I’m only able to pull it back a couple inches. “That’s as far as I can go.”
“Ok, that’s fine. You’re doing very good. Now, try the left.” Same thing happens on the left side. “Ok, I want you to try to pull yourself up.” She motions to Alex to come closer to the bed. “We’re going to hold your hands and support your arms, and I want you to try and pull yourself up.”
She takes my right hand and forearm and Alex takes my left. I take a deep breath and tighten my grip on their hands. I imagine myself at the gym doing pull ups and try to contract my muscles to lift my shoulders off the bed. I’m able lift myself a few inches, but then fall back. Daria starts to release my hand. “Wait, I want to try again.” She promptly adjusts her grip on my hand.
My arms are shaking and I’m breathing heavily, but I’m not giving up. I put all of my focus into commanding my muscles to my will. They labor under my weight for a few minutes, but I do it. I get to a full upright position. I look at Alex and she’s smiling affectionately at me. I love when she smiles at me like that.
“Good job, Jordan. You can rest now.” Daria and Alex help me lay back down before they both release my hands. “Ok, I’m going to test your ability to recognize different sensations now. For this first part, Alex is going to touch different parts of your body and I want you to tell me what she’s touching. Close your eyes.”
I close my eyes and don’t feel anything for a couple moments, but then I feel her gentle cool hand. “My forehead.” Alex removes her hand and one by one, she moves her hand over my body touching each arm, leg, foot, hand, and even my stomach. My body is buzzing with electricity from her gentle touch.
“Good, now open your eyes.” Daria comes up next to me and shows me three objects. “These are going to further test your ability to feel different sensations. We want to see if you can feel heat, cold, and pain. These should not cause you any extreme discomfort, but please tell us if anything bothers you at all. Now close your eyes. You’ll need to tell me the body part and the type of sensation you feel.”
After several minutes of being poked and prodded, I’m instructed to open my eyes again.
“Jordan, you’re doing fantastic. I have just one more thing I want to test. We’re going to pull you up to a sitting position and I want to test your range of motion with your neck.” Daria and Alex both grip me above the elbow and behind my back and pull me up. Alex wraps her arm around my back providing me support and stabilizing me. “Ok, turn your head to the left as far as you can. Now the right. Good. Now, look up at the ceiling tilting your head back as far as you can. Stay there. Do you feel any pain or dizziness?”
“No.”
“Ok, now try to touch your chin to your chest. Good. Ok, now the next few may seem weird, but bear with me. O
pen your mouth as wide as you can.” She releases my elbow and feels my jaw line and cheek. “Ok, relax. Stick your tongue out as far as you can.” I look at her like she’s crazy and she smiles. “Humor me, Jordan. I promise, I’m not toying with you.” I laugh a little and follow her instruction. “Good, relax. Move your eyes side to side while keeping your head straight. Now, roll them. Ok, good. Blink very quickly. Stop. And again. Good.” They help me lay back again.
“Ok, Jordan, I’m done testing you today. You really do have the spirit of a fighter for sure. To be able to come back like you did, and to have the control you have, really shows you want to be here and want to get better. That is really going to help you get through therapy. This process will not be easy and it may be very frustrating at first. Just try to be patient with yourself and don’t get discouraged. We’ll start tomorrow.”
“Thank you. I appreciate your help.” She smiles and pats my arm. “That’s what I’m here for. Ok, she’s all yours Doc’s.”
Dr. Hamlin and Dr. Sharif both step over closer to the bed smiling. Dr. Hamlin says, “Jordan, I have been working with head trauma and coma patients for over twenty years and you are quite an anomaly. I’ve never seen anyone, in all my thirty years as a doctor, come back to life with no resuscitation assistance. I know it’s happened, but you are the first that I have actually witnessed. How you managed to get back here,” he pauses and looks at Alex with a smile before looking back at me and finishing, “is a marvel. We do need to run some tests and do some blood work now to check all your vitals and make sure everything looks good before we get deep into some physical therapy. Alex will draw your blood for the blood work and then a transporter will be here soon to take you for a full body MRI and CT scan. Alex will accompany you to both and then you will be brought back here. I’ll see you in a few hours.”
After they leave, Alex says, “I’ll be right back. I just need to get a few things so I can take your blood.”
“No need. Here you go.” The same nurse from earlier walks into the room pushing a cart. “They need three vials.” She places the empty vials on the bed next to my arm and then looks at me with a smile. “Welcome back to the land of the living. I’m Katie.” She looks like she’s maybe a few years younger than me, is slightly round with a round plain face. “Thanks, Katie.” She smiles and looks at Alex. “I need to pop in the room next door, but I’ll come back for that.”
When she leaves, Alex looks at me with a shy smile. “Jordan, are you ok with me drawing your blood or would you prefer someone else to do it?” I laugh and extend my arm to her. “Nope, I want you to do it.”
I watch Alex as she puts on a pair of lilac nitrile gloves and secures a length of blue rubbery material around my arm, just above the elbow. She gently presses two fingers into the site to feel for my vein and it seems to jump at her touch and pops up closer to the surface for her. She rubs an alcohol swab over the area and then brings the needle down, but hesitates. She looks at me with a shy smile.
“I like watching you work.” She lets out a small laugh and her cheeks blush a little. She looks down to insert the needle, but I continue to look at her face. She’s so gentle that I barely feel the needle at all. In no time at all, she’s done and putting a ball of gauze and tape over the draw site.
“Do I get a sticker now for being a good patient?” Alex looks at me and smiles. “I don’t have any stickers.” I grin and look towards the door. “I’ll settle for a kiss from my cute nurse then.” Alex laughs and looks towards the door. She quickly bends down and gives me a quick soft kiss on the lips. “Thank you.” She grins as she wraps pre-printed labels around my vials and adds them to the tube holder with the other full vials.
After Katie comes and wheels the cart out, Alex comes to stand next to me and takes my hand with a worried look on her face.
“What’s wrong?”
“Are you really done with boxing?”
“Yes. Why?” She gently rubs her thumb over the top of my hand. “I saw your fight online. You were in the news and everything. I couldn’t believe you agreed to that match when that girl was in a higher division than you. When I watched your match, I cried. You were amazing, but you took such a beating. The camera zoomed in on your face so many times. It was shocking to see the beating your face took, but what struck me the most was the look in your eyes. Tina looked hateful and menacing, but you looked caged, like you were only there because you thought you had to be. It didn’t look like it was something you wanted to be doing, even before the match even started. I can’t watch you go through that again.”
“You won’t have to. I promise.”
Chapter Nine
Even though I tried to fight it, I fell asleep at some point in the middle of the night. Alex had insisted on staying with me because she didn’t want me to be scared if I fell asleep and woke up alone in the middle of the night or morning. I told her it was ok if she wanted to go home and sleep because she had stayed by my side all day and night and I knew she was exhausted, but I was actually very grateful she fought me on it. I had startled myself awake a couple times in the middle of the night and seeing her sitting next to me instantly calmed my panic. The last time I woke up before falling back asleep was around 2am and my night nurse came in to check on me. Alex had fallen asleep next to me with her head on the edge of my pillow and her body barely on the bed. My night nurse, Sonya, smiled seeing I was awake and quietly said, “That poor child has been watching over you for months with so much love and affection. You two really have everyone’s hearts a puttering over your surreal love story.” Sonya is a kind middle aged woman and I instantly liked her. She brought in an extra pillow and carefully placed it under Alex’s head before draping a blanket over her. She also raised the side rail on that side of the bed to make sure she didn’t fall off.
I don’t know what time it is, but it’s starting to get light outside. Alex is still asleep next to me and she looks so beautiful and peaceful. I just can’t stop looking at her. I slowly raise my hand to move a strand of hair that has fallen in her face, and as I brush it back, she slowly opens her eyes. At the same time, we both smile as we lay on our pillows looking at each other. I rest my hand against her cheek and her smile widens.
“Thank you for staying with me.” She presses her hand against the back of mine a moment before moving my hand off her cheek, firmly kisses my palm, and then entwines her fingers with mine. “Thank you for not forgetting me.” I smile and lift my head to kiss her. Alex meets me half way and our lips press together. I feel so much happiness and excitement in my chest that I almost laugh. When I pull back, I lay my head back down and we continue to just look at each other smiling. After a few moments, Alex says, “I really like your eyes.” I laugh a little because Alex has such beautiful eyes that I can’t see why she would like my hazel eyes. “Why? Mine aren’t beautiful like yours.” She brushes her thumb across my cheek and smiles wider. “They are beautiful and I really love how I feel when you’re looking at me.”
“Did I open my eyes at all while I was in the coma?”
“No. Some coma patients open their eyes or have their eyes open the whole time, but you didn’t open your eyes till you came back.”
“It’s just so weird how your eyes look exactly the way I saw them in my head, but the rest of you is just a little different. It’s just hard to believe that I didn’t actually see them at all. Did I do anything at all or just lay here like a dead person for three months?”
“There were several times that I felt your hand slightly grip mine while I was holding it and talking to you. There were a couple times that the corner of your mouth twitched into a small smile. When Callie was here talking to you, you surprised the hell out of her by reaching for her hand. You only moved your hand a few inches, but you curled your fingers around hers.”
“Why did they pull the plug?” Her smile disappears and she looks towards the door briefly. “I don’t really know why your dad signed the papers because no one was pushing for it. We
were all hopeful that you would pull through because you seemed to know people were here with you when we were talking to you. The doctors didn’t think you could live without the life support though and said it could be a long time before you pulled out of the coma. Your mom and Callie were here visiting with you pretty much every single day. Your dad only came once a week or every other week after the first few weeks. When he was here, he looked broken. I don’t think he could handle seeing you like that. He never spoke to you or touched you, even when the doctors encouraged him to.”
“When did you find out it was going to happen?”
“Almost too late. I had just gotten here and was locking my stuff in my locker when Katie came rushing in to tell me. I ran all the way to your room and only had five minutes with you before they came.” I smile and kiss her hand that’s still holding mine. “Thank you for running and helping me find my way out of there.” Alex smiles and leans forward pressing her lips against mine.
“Good morning.” We both pull apart and look towards the direction of the cheery voice. Katie is looking at us both smiling while she pushes a cart in that looks like a very tall TV dinner tray. Alex sits up and I immediately feel the absence of her warmth next to me. Katie just smiles and pushes the cart up next to the bed. “The doctors want you to try and eat something before you start your physical therapy today. Oh, and just so you know, the newspaper already got word of your miraculous come back and has been asking for an audience with you for an interview.”
“Thanks for the food, but uh, I’m not interested in talking to the paper.” Katie smiles kindly. “I don’t blame you. Don’t worry, Dr. Hamlin has given strict orders they are not allowed anywhere near you unless you ok it.”
After Katie leaves, Alex reaches to put the guard rail down on her side of the bed. I put my hand on her back and she turns to look at me. “Before you get up…” I tug on her elbow and pull her down into an embrace. I wrap my arms around her back and she inhales deeply. Before she pulls back, I gently kiss the side of her neck and whisper in her ear, “I love you.” She pulls back enough to look at me and she’s smiling. She gently kisses my lips and whispers back, “I love you, too.”
