Pistols For Two and Other Stories

by Джорджетт Хейер

  Miss Tresilian refrained from comment. It seemed to her unlikely that Mr Rosely had ever offered Lord Iver the least pretext for a display of tyranny, for while she could not but acknowledge the sweetness of his disposition she did not feel that resolution was amongst his many virtues. No hint of a strong will was to be detected in his delicate countenance, none of the determination that characterized Lucy.

  ‘And even if he doesn’t consent, we shall come off all right,’ said Lucy cheerfully. ‘After all, I have quite a genteel fortune of my own, and we can subsist on that, until your stupid Trust comes to an end.’

  But at this Miss Tresilian intervened, saying firmly that neither she nor Lucy’s papa could countenance an engagement entered into without Lord Iver’s sanction. Lucy, always outspoken, said: ‘Dearest, you know that’s fudge! All Papa would say is that you must settle it as you think best!’

  Miss Tresilian laughed, but said: ‘Well, I can’t settle it, precisely, but I can and must forbid an engagement at this present. I am very sorry for you both, but unless Lord Iver should change his mind I am afraid there is nothing for it but to wait until Arthur’s fortune passes into his own hands.’

  It was not to be expected that two young persons deep in love could view with anything but dismay the prospect of waiting more than three years before becoming engaged. Mr Rosely took a dejected leave of the ladies, and went away, saying that he was sure he must be able to prevail upon Iver to relent; and Lucy at once set about the task of convincing her aunt that her attachment to her Arthur was no girlish fancy to be speedily forgotten.

  It was unnecessary. Although she had been virtually in her aunt’s charge since her childhood only fifteen years separated them, and the bonds of affection between them were strong. Miss Tresilian knew that her niece was neither volatile nor impressionable. She had been much courted in Bath, but none of her suitors, before the arrival on the scene of Mr Rosely, had done so much as turn her head. But she had fallen in love with Mr Rosely at first sight, and not for the sake of his handsome face. ‘Handsome?’ said Lucy. ‘I suppose he is—oh, yes, of course he is! Everyone says so! But, to own the truth, I don’t in general care about fair men, and try as I will I cannot admire Grecian profiles!’ She added, such a glow in her eyes as Miss Tresilian had never before seen: ‘His nature is by far more beautiful than his countenance. He has so much sensibility—such quickness of apprehension! It is as though we had known each other all our lives. Oh, my dearest aunt, I never dreamed I could be so happy!’

  No, Lucy was not likely to fall out of love, nor was it possible to suppose her to be infatuated. She seemed to be aware of the flaw in his character, for when her aunt ventured to suggest that his amiability perhaps made him a trifle too persuadable she replied without hesitation: ‘Exactly so! I don’t mean to say that he could be persuaded to do wrong, for his principles are fixed; but his nature is gentle, and his diffidence leads him to rely more on another’s judgment than his own. That is one reason why I can’t and won’t wait for nearly four years before marrying him!’

  ‘Lucy dear, could you be happy with a husband who would allow you to rule the roost?’

  ‘To own the truth,’ replied Lucy mischievously, ‘I have a strong notion that I couldn’t be happy with any other! You know what a detestably managing disposition I have!’ She added, in a more serious tone: ‘Please help me, dear Aunt Elinor! If there were any reason for Lord Iver’s refusal to give his consent I promise you I would respect it! There is none! But Arthur has been so much in the habit of deferring to him that if all must remain at a stand for nearly four years—Oh, aunt, he is the horridest creature, and my enemy besides! I couldn’t mistake! I have met him only once, when Mrs Crewe took me to the Walton’s ball, and Arthur brought him up to me, but he looked at me in such a way! If I had been a shabby-genteel wretch on the catch for a rich husband he couldn’t have been more repelling! But he must know I’m nothing of the kind, for Lady Windlesham does—and if Arthur’s sister likes the match I wish you will tell me what right Lord Iver has—’ She checked herself. ‘Well! Talking won’t pay toll. Think for me, Aunt Elinor! Useless to suppose that Arthur will be able to bring that creature about!’

  Even less than her niece did Miss Tresilian believe that Mr Rosely’s efforts would meet with success, and much more astonished than Lucy was she when, two days later, Lord Iver came to call at the slim house in Green Street which she had hired for the season. Indeed, the news that he was awaiting her in the drawing-room startled her into exclaiming: ‘Oh, no! No, no, I cannot—!’ However, she recollected herself almost immediately, sent the servant down again to tell his lordship she would be with him directly, and turned to cast an anxious glance at her reflection in the mirror.

  With the buoyancy of youth, Lucy was much inclined to think that Lord Iver had miraculously capitulated, and had come to discuss the marriage settlements. Miss Tresilian, with no such expectation, begged her not to indulge optimism, and trod resolutely downstairs, pledged to support the lovers’ cause.

  The visitor was standing with his back to the room, looking out of the window, but when he heard the door open he turned, and stared with hard, challenging eyes at his hostess.

  She shut the door, but remained by it, meeting that fierce scrutiny resolutely. For a minute neither spoke, but each scanned the other, the lady perceiving a powerfully-built man, harsh-featured and swarthy, whose close-cropped hair, sporting neckcloth, and gleaming top-boots proclaimed the Corinthian; the gentleman gazing at an uncommonly pretty woman. Miss Tresilian was on the shady side of thirty, but although she had lately taken to wearing a cap over her soft brown curls, and bore herself with the assurance of her years, she retained the face and figure of a much younger woman.

  It was she who broke the silence, saying, as she moved forward: ‘You wished, I think, to see me, sir. May I know why?’

  He bowed stiffly. ‘I am obliged to you for receiving me, ma’am. As to my wishes—! I thought it best to come here in person, that there should be no misunderstanding between us.’

  ‘Pray be seated, sir!’ said Miss Tresilian, disposing herself gracefully in a winged armchair.

  He did not avail himself of this invitation, but said abruptly: ‘I imagine you must know what my errand is. If you are indeed your niece’s guardian—but you will permit me to say that I find it incredible that you should be! She has a father, and you are by far too young to be her guardian!’

  ‘Certainly she has a father,’ replied Miss Tresilian coldly. ‘When he married again, however, it was agreed that his daughter should remain in my charge. Let me remind you that I am no longer a young woman, sir!’

  At this point, the conversation, which had been conducted with the appearance at least of formality, underwent a change. ‘I know to a day how old you are, so don’t talk nonsense to me!’ said his lordship impatiently. ‘A more ramshackle arrangement—! Is your sister with you?’

  ‘No,’ said Miss Tresilian, eyeing him with hostility, ‘she is not! The indifferent state of her health—’

  He gave a crack of sardonic laughter. ‘You needn’t tell me! Still suffering spasms and vapours to throw a rub in your way, is she?’

  ‘Pray, did you come here merely to discuss my sister’s constitution?’ demanded Miss Tresilian.

  ‘You know very well why I am here! This lamentable affair between your niece and my cousin—which you appear to have encouraged!’

  ‘I can assure you, however, that had I known of Mr Rosely’s relationship to you, sir, I should have done my utmost to discourage an affair which I dislike quite as much as you do!’

  ‘A pretty sort of guardian, not to have made it your business to enquire who were Arthur’s relations!’ he said scathingly.

  ‘And did you make it your business to acquaint yourself with all Lucy’s remote cousins?’ she retorted.

  ‘It was unnecessary. I knew her to be your niece, and that was enough! In plain words, I don’t wish for the connection, and shall do what I m
ay to put an end to it. Don’t underrate me! you’ll find I can do a great deal!’

  ‘Do rid your mind of the notion that the connection is any more welcome to me than it is to you!’ begged Miss Tresilian. ‘Nothing could be more repugnant to me than an alliance with any member of your family!’

  ‘So I should suppose—since you made it plain enough when you jilted me!’

  ‘If you mean by that that I terminated an unfortunate engagement which you were regretting quite as much as I—’

  ‘I didn’t come here to discuss ancient history!’ he interrupted roughly.

  ‘Well, if you came merely to inform me that you don’t wish your precious cousin to marry Lucy you’ve wasted your time!’ she countered.

  ‘Ah!’ instantly responded his lordship. ‘So you do support them, do you? I might have known it!’

  She was about to repudiate this suggestion when it occurred to her that to do so would scarcely be in accordance with her promise to help her niece. It cost her a severe struggle, but she managed to summon up a smile, and to say with creditable composure: ‘Come! It won’t serve for us to rip up at each other, Iver. We may regret this business, but a twelve-year-old quarrel between us doesn’t constitute a bar to these children’s marriage.’

  ‘Have you told your niece?’

  ‘No—any more than you, I collect, have told your cousin! Much good would that do! They would say, and rightly, that it was no concern of theirs!’

  ‘Well, I won’t have it!’ he announced.

  ‘Now, don’t fly into a pelter!’ she begged. ‘Our differences apart, what is there to be said against the match? Nothing, I dare say, could be more suitable!’ She hesitated, and then added, with a little difficulty: ‘How odiously selfish we should be if we were to let them break their hearts only because we once quarrelled!’

  His lips curled disdainfully. ‘Hearts are not so easily broken!’

  ‘No one knows that better than I!’ she retorted.

  ‘We need not, then, discuss such an absurdity.’

  Realizing, too late, the infelicity of her retort, she tried to recover lost ground. ‘Neither of us is in a position to judge what may be the sufferings of two people who truly love one another! Lucy’s character is unlike mine: her affection is not easily won, and is by far more tenacious than mine.’

  ‘It could hardly be less!’ he interpolated. ‘Spare me any more moving speeches! She is young enough to recover from her disappointment, and will no doubt transfer her affections soon enough to some other, and, I trust, equally eligible suitor!’

  Stung, she retaliated: ‘She might well do that!’

  ‘Oh, play off no airs for my edification!’ he said angrily. ‘You won’t hoax me into believing that you are not well aware that my cousin is one of the biggest prizes in the Matrimonial Mart! A feather in any girl’s cap!’

  Rising hastily to her feet, she said: ‘If I have anything to say to it, he won’t be a feather in Lucy’s cap, and that, my lord, you may depend on!’

  ‘Thank you!’ he replied. ‘You have given me the assurance I sought, and I have nothing further to do here than to take my leave of you! Your obedient servant, ma’am!’

  ‘Lucy,’ said Miss Tresilian, with determined calm, ‘if your pride doesn’t revolt at the imputation of having snared a rich matrimonial prize, mine does! I am not asking you to put all thought of Arthur out of your head: I am merely saying that until he is in every respect his own master, and you have come of age, I will neither countenance his visits to this house, nor allow you to go where there is the least likelihood of your meeting him.’

  The youngest Miss Tresilian said, with a brave attempt to speak lightly: ‘Dearest, do you mean to lock me up? I must meet him at all the ton parties, and at Almack’s too!’

  ‘I know it,’ said her aunt. ‘And you know I don’t mean to lock you up! I have a much better scheme in mind, and one which I think you must like. Indeed, I know you will, for you have always wished to visit foreign countries, only, of course, while that dreadful Bonaparte was at large it was impossible. Now, however—’

  ‘Oh, no, no!’ Lucy cried. ‘I don’t care a straw for anything Lord Iver may think! He has no power to forbid my marriage to Arthur, and if he is so spiteful as to cut off Arthur’s allowance we shall contrive to live tolerably comfortably on my inheritance. And no one will think ill of Arthur for doing so, because the instant he is five-and-twenty he may pay me back every groat, if he feels he ought! All we need is Papa’s consent—which is to say yours, my dear aunt!’

  ‘And you won’t get it!’ said Miss Tresilian, with unusual asperity. ‘Dear child, consider! How can you expect me to behave so improperly as to support a marriage which the person most nearly concerned with Arthur’s affairs has expressly forbidden?’ She saw that her words had struck home, and lost no time in representing to Lucy all the advantages of her scheme. She was listened to in silence, but had the satisfaction, when she had talked herself out of arguments, of being caught into a warm embrace, and tightly hugged.

  ‘You are the best and kindest of aunts!’ Lucy declared. ‘I do understand what you must feel—indeed, I do! Never would I ask you to do what you think wrong! I had not reflected how impossible it must be for you! Forgive me!’

  Much heartened, Miss Tresilian recommended her not to be a goose, and wondered how speedily she could put her plans into execution, and what her exacting elder sister would say when she learned that she meant, instead of returning to her home in Camden Place, to embark on an extended foreign tour.

  It could not have been said that Lucy entered into any of the arrangements which occupied Miss Tresilian’s every moment during the follow week, or evinced the smallest enthusiasm for any of the promised treats in store, but she uttered no protests, and that, in Miss Tresilian’s opinion, was as much as could be hoped for in the natural oppression of her spirits. Calculating ways and means, Miss Tresilian paused to consider the likelihood of Mr Rosely’s following his inamorata. Probably Lord Iver would scotch any such scheme, but she determined nevertheless to add her prohibition to his.

  In the event, she was denied the opportunity of private speech with Mr Rosely. Returning to Green Street just after eleven one morning, after a protracted appointment in the City she was met by her personal maid, who did not scruple to read her a scold for having sallied forth alone on what this severe critic apparently believed to have been an expedition fraught with peril. ‘And breakfast waiting for you this hour past!’ said Miss Baggeridge, relieving her of her shawl and gloves. ‘Now, you sit down this instant, Miss Elinor! Traipsing all about the town, and knocking yourself up like you are! What your poor mama would have said I’m sure I don’t know!’

  Accustomed from her childhood to her henchwoman’s strictures, Miss Tresilian only said, as she removed her becoming hat of chip-straw: ‘Where’s Miss Lucy? I suppose she breakfasted an hour ago.’

  ‘It’s what anyone might suppose of a young lady of quality,’ said Miss Baggeridge grimly. ‘Though why they should, with you setting her the example you do, miss—’

  ‘—you are sure you don’t know!’ supplied Miss Tresilian.

  Miss Baggeridge fixed her with a kindling eye. ‘Well do I know it’s not my place to utter a word, miss, and far be it from me to unclose my lips on the subject, but when it comes to a young lady gallivanting about the town without so much as the page-boy to escort her, and carrying a bandbox on her arm like a common person, I couldn’t reconcile it with my conscience not to speak!’

  ‘If she was carrying a bandbox, she has only gone to take back that French cambric half-robe which must be altered,’ said Miss Tresilian prosaically.

  Miss Baggeridge sniffed, but refrained from further comment. Having seen her mistress supplied with fresh coffee and bread and butter, she produced from her pocket a sealed missive, saying, in a grudging tone: ‘There’s a letter from Miss Clara. There was a shilling to pay on it, too. I suppose you’d better have it, but if I was you, miss, I
wouldn’t worrit myself with it till you’ve eaten your breakfast.’

  With these sage words of advice she withdrew; and Miss Tresilian, never one to shirk a disagreeable duty, broke the wafer of her sister’s letter, and spread open three crossed pages of complaint.

  While she sipped her coffee she perused these. Nothing could have been more discouraging than the eldest Miss Tresilian’s account of her health, but as her detailed descriptions of the torment she endured from rheumatism, nervous tic, spasm, and insomnia were interspersed with the latest Bath on-dits. and some animadversions on the wretched cards she had held at the whist-table, Miss Elinor Tresilian’s withers remained unwrung. She gathered that Clara was contriving to amuse herself tolerably well; was relieved to read no very serious criticism of the indigent lady engaged to act as companion to the invalid, and got up to place the letter in her writing-bureau. She never did so. No sooner had she raised the lid of the bureau than she found herself staring down at a letter addressed to herself in Lucy’s handwriting. Clara’s missive dropped to the floor, and Miss Tresilian, with a premonition of disaster, snatched up her niece’s letter, and tore off the wafer that sealed it.

  Dear, dearest aunt, she read. This will come as a Shock to you, and I can only implore you to forgive me, and to understand (as I am persuaded you will) the Exigency of my Situation, nothing less than which could have prevailed upon me to act in a manner as Repugnant to me as, alas, it will be to you. By the time your eyes alight on these lines I shall be many miles distant, and when I Cast myself at your feet to beg your Pardon it will be as the Bride of my Adored Arthur. Oh, my dear aunt, believe that I have not reached this Momentous Decision without an Agonizing Struggle, for to Approach the Altar without your Blessing, or your presence to support me at that Solemn Moment, so sinks my spirits that only my Conviction that your Refusal to sanction my Engagement sprang not from your Heart but from your sense of Propriety gives me courage to pursue a Line of Conduct which must Shock you and all theworld. My only Comfort (besides the Bliss of being united to the Best and Noblest of men) is that You cannot be held accountable, even by Lord Iver, for what I must call (though my hand shrinks from penning the Dreadful Syllables’) my Elopement. . . .