Letters

by John Barth

  Had we thought this subplot done? Reggie regroups and reassaults, catching A. a stiff clout on the shoulder: these symbols are no tokens, but heroic-scale bronzes weighing half a stone each! Perfectly furious, Abmrose deals him in reply a pen-stroke that might have split his directorial head, but happily only smashes once again his spectacles. Prinz gives a cry and comes down with the palm on Ambrose’s wrist. The pen falls (I grab it); Author tackles Director; they thrash like schoolboys in the mud; the planes roar out as the storm moves back in—and at this appropriate moment the electrical generator fails.

  Enough, A. B. Cook and History agree. Brice and Bruce are with us. We separate the soiled combatants: Reggie’s cheek is cut and bruised; Ambrose’s wrist (we shall learn) is fractured. Both are mucky and disabled; neither is in terrible pain. There is a general move toward shelter, but Cook and I—and Ambrose, when he gets his breath—are concerned for Merope, who is not to be found with the others back in the lodge. Nor, ominously, is the Emperor of the French. A search must be mounted: if the storm re-retreats, Cook informs us, the navy might well resume their firing exercise.

  I am forbidden to join the party. Not male chauvinism, Ambrose explains (holding his right wrist), but reasonable concern for my condition. I yield; it is awfully messy out there. Prinze declines the invitation: true, he can scarcely see without his glasses, but he seems to us not much to care. Indeed, he appears if anything disgusted with his protégée for having thrown in the palm and bolted (our host has retrieved both emblems, tisking his tongue at their misuse). In the end it is Cook, Ambrose, and three of the hippies—comrades of Merope’s from the Marshyhope commencement bust—who sally out into the swamp with ponchos and pocket torches.

  They find no trace of the abdicated emperor. There is some concern that he may have strayed into the Prohibited Zone, since at its perimeter (marked with large warnings of unexploded ordnance) they discover poor bedraggled Fame. She is intact, not apparently injured, but quite dazed, sitting in a puddle in the marshy path, propped against the warning sign. They wonder whether she has been raped: Her jeans are open, and there is a fresh bruise on her bum. Nope, she says, dopily; she “took a leak” and then “sort of zonked out.” I shall wonder later, as I tend to her back in the lodge, whether she did in fact take some sort of drug, voluntarily or otherwise: one of her comrades, a black girl named Thelma, intimates surprisingly that Bray is involved in the narcotics trade! In any case, our starlet is most certainly woozy. We put her to bed.

  I am obliged to speak well of Mr Cook’s management of this wacky emergency. Despite his incongruous and now mud-spoiled costume, he is all authority and good sense in his organisation of the search and his solicitude for Ms. Bernstein. He now insists that Author and Director declare, if not a truce, at least a cease-fire for the duration of their visit to Barataria. He will telephone the navy at once concerning Bray; given the weather, he does not believe that firing will be resumed; on the other hand, he thinks it useless to pursue the search for Bray before morning. We should all go to bed. The filmists as usual will bunk about the floors and porches of the lodge; we lovebirds are to do him the honour of using the guest apartment in the caretaker’s cottage. The man even bandages, and expertly, my lover’s wrist, which is now sore and swelling, accompanying his first aid with ribald innuendo. Tweedledee remarks that we did not really “do” the accidental explosion of the navy yard, per Andrew IV’s letter. Andrew VI opines that we have enough big-bang footage to serve, and bids us good night.

  But A. and I are too amused, aroused, and exhausted to sleep. Showered and pajama’d, we praise each other’s scrappiness; we shake our heads at the rueful irony of his injured writing hand and wonder about Merope and Bray and A. B. Cook. (I wonder too whether we are sharing the same bed in which—but never mind.) We decide that the Word-versus-Image subplot really has gone far enough, at least in its hostile aspect. Presently we sleep, only to be waked well after midnight by a single final mighty bang out in the marshes. It seems to have come from the direction of the firing zone; but there is no sound of planes, and the storm has passed to occasional silent lightning flickers in the east. Has Bruce, we wonder, slipped out after all to do the navy yard? Or has luckless Napoleon stumbled upon a bit of unexploded ordnance and blown himself to kingdom come? In any case, I sleepily observe, it is indeed past midnight: i.e., it is Monday, 25 August, 1st day of Week 4 etc. We may put by our programmatic abstinence. We do.

  Next morning all hands compare notes on that last explosion. B. & B. disclaim responsibility, but wish they’d “caught” it. Merope is still stoned, Prinz is still fed up, with her and all of us. A. B. Cook has been up betimes: navy search-craft are on their way, he reports, and adds that inasmuch as he has been being pressured to yield title to Barataria Lodge to the federal government, we may expect some interrogatory harassment from navy intelligence and security people concerning trespass into the Prohibited Area. We are to cooperate respectfully (There are cries of “Off the pigs!”)—but if anyone happens to possess marijuana or other illegal material, it were well to dispose of it. Laughter, hoots, further obscenities, and much busy disposal.

  Ambrose’s wrist is sorer and sorer, and our business is done. Even so, we dally till nearly noon out of curiosity to watch the search and speak to sober-faced but polite military people. Ambrose uses Cook’s typewriter to peck out his left-handed letter to you, and remarks afterward that he can now sympathise with his late father’s one-armed attempt at memorial sculpture. No trace of Jerry Bray. Still bluff and cheerful, Cook nonetheless expresses concern that the Department of Defense may use this unfortunate accident to justify condemnation proceedings against him.

  There is one final small crisis. On the first available boat after breakfast, Reg Prinz leaves for the mainland, for his rented car (how can he drive without his glasses?), and for Manhattan, with not even a good-bye to Merry B. She is not too “zonked” to get the message, with suitable abandoned outcry. I do my best and then leave her to her friends, who agree that the fellow is a fink, maybe even a nark. Cook urges us to stay for lunch, thanks us for our assistance as if he were the film’s producer (who knows?), and heartily hopes we’ll “see things through to the final frame.”

  The former invitation we decline. The latter, in its cinematographic aspect, involves two more scenes: Fort McHenry and Barataria. We shall see. Between ourselves, I happily report, Ambrose and I are indeed inclined to See Things Through et cetera—though there has arisen, since the Burning of Washington, a certain question about the number of frames to go.

  Of that question I shall not speak here: see his, our, letter to “A. M. King,” attached. We were ferried back in style to Bishops Head aboard one of the small navy craft (Ambrose pointed out a skipjack entering the strait under sail from seaward and wondered whether it was Mr Andrews’s), retrieved our car, and drove home—History at the wheel, perforce—to the sinking Menschhaus.

  A bittersweet interval, the next few days: see that same letter. Our original 4th Stage, you may remember (I surely do), was something sorry, as was our 5th: that degrading latter May and June and July. A good side of the bad coin of Peter’s crisis is that—along with our growing love—it set aside all but the tenderest echoes of those reenactments of, respectively, Ambrose’s marriage to Marsha Blank and the ménage à trois with Peter and Magda which immediately preceded our own affair. I can therefore summarise. Even as we got Ambrose’s wrist fracture set and cast in the hospital emergency room, Peter was discharged into our care to await his radical surgery: the last ten days, as it turned out, of his life. On 27 August the full Sturgeon Moon rose out of the upper Choptank, sailed over Mensch’s Castle, and set in Chesapeake Bay without the aid of Germaine Gordon Pitt’s menstruation. Magda wept and kissed me. Peter called for champagne. Ambrose hugged his daughter, his sister-in-law, and his fiancée, and soberly toasted the health of… the six of us. On the Saturday (30 August) a letter arrived from Marsha, meant to shock us: Peter, she declared, not Ambrose, w
as Angela’s father. It did not. More champagne. See A.‘s letter.

  The which he taped, and I transcribed, on the Monday, 1 September, Labour Day. In and by it Ambrose proposed to marry me on Saturday 13th (the date of this, though we are not there yet); and I accepted despite certain apprehensions therein registered. We did not know, as we played with our sixes and sevens and scheduled climaxes within climaxes, that Joe Morgan up in Fort Erie was shooting himself through the head, and that Marsha Blank Mensch had (reluctantly, I’m sure) relieved Ambrose of further alimony payments by marrying Jacob Horner! And that dear Peter had but four more days to live.

  Those days—the first four of our 5th week of Mutuality—are too near and dear and painful to recount. I am not a weak woman. I have myself watched a husband die (and lost a previous lover, and a son). But I do not fathom the strength and serenity, or the capaciousness of heart, of Magda Giulianova. I quite love that woman! We four (five, six) quite loved one another. I can say no more. See etc.

  On the 4th, a Thursday, Peter reentered hospital for amputation of both legs, one to the hip, the other to the knee, with every likelihood even so of surviving less than five years. A confusion of schedules kept the orthopedic surgeon, a weekly visitor from Baltimore, up in the city a day longer than expected; the operation was postponed till next afternoon. That Thursday night someone broke into the closed office of Mensch Masonry, rifled the files (sealed by court-appointed receivers), and stole copies of the design specifications and foundation blueprints of the Marshyhope Tower of Truth. No clues yet; suspicion falls heavily and kindlessly upon Ambrose, who was in fact with me and/or Magda uninterruptedly. On the Friday morning, sometime before dawn, Peter took a massive dose of Tylenol and ended his life. Suspicion there, too, falls upon the Menschhaus, more mildly but in this case accurately. Though there will be no investigation beyond the routine enquiry required to clear the hospital of liability, the fact is that Magda and Ambrose supplied Peter with pills, at his request, on the Wednesday or Thursday, precisely in case he should change his mind about seeing things through to the final frame.

  Why Tylenol? Because, Ambrose explained, aspirin, barbiturates, Seconal, and the like can be promptly pumped out, especially when their taker is already in hospital, without fatal results. But Tylenol, in large doses, besides being easier to lay hands on than prescription chemicals, quickly does irreversible and lethal liver damage. Peter thus became, along with his sculpting Uncle Wilhelm, the only member of the family known not to have died of cancer. We buried him last Saturday beside that uncle and the others, all his limbs attached.

  (Angie has been difficult to manage since. The loss seems to have sickened her physically: she wakes up vomiting.)

  That same Saturday came the shocking news of Morgan’s accident or suicide (word reached the local newspaper on the Wednesday, but we in the Lighthouse were too distracted to read the newspapers): specifically, that his gunshot wound had been ruled self-inflicted and Jacob Horner cleared of implication, and that the body had been returned from Fort Erie to our neighbouring town of Wicomico for burial on the same day we buried Peter (Morgan’s late wife is buried over there; we have since learned that Horner and his bride accompanied the casket from Ontario to Maryland, along with Morgan’s sons). The funeral having been a private affair, there was to be a memorial service next day in the chapel of Marshyhope State University. We decided that I should attend, as having been closest of the family to Morgan. Ambrose would stay with Magda and Angie.

  It was a fairly nauseating ceremonial, not however without its comic touches. I should pass over it except that so many of “your characters” were there, and that it gives to this narrative of my affair with Ambrose Mensch an almost novelistic symmetry: we “began” with the service for Harrison Mack on Redmans Neck in February, and in effect we “end” (our premarital courtship, not our connexion!) with another such service in the same general geography.

  It was conducted in the Show and Tell Room of MSU’s Media Centre, which doubles as a nondenominational campus chapel until the enormous projected new Hall of All Faiths shall have been raised. So declared the nervous young university chaplain, a new appointee, over the newly installed super-quadraphonic public-address system, out from which the new audiovisual crew had not yet got all the bugs. It also served, he said, this sad convocation, as mournful prelude to a more positive spiritual programme: the new series of “Sunday Raps” to be held every Sabbath morn of the regular semester, commencing with a jazz-rock orientation rap a week hence (tomorrow). Marshyhope’s first president, he was (wrongly) confident, would be pleased. And now, himself not having been fortunate enough to know President Morgan personally, he would relinquish the mike to our current chief executive, who would, so to speak, emcee the rest of the show.

  I had slipped in intentionally late, not to have to suffer the condolences of John Schott & Co. or to deal, if I could avoid dealing, with Marsha Blank Mensch Horner, who I feared might be present. From a back seat in the S & T Room I saw that she was: as whacked-out-appearing as her bridegroom, but with a restored grimness of eye and jaw that evoked my image of the Marsha Primordial—and gave me to wonder once again why A. had ever married her. Horner looked paralysed with terror at being off the premises of the Remobilisation Farm; very possibly he was. There were two long-haired, grave-faced young men I took to be Joe’s sons; there was Jane Mack, impassive and apparently alone, her son Drew likewise, and Todd Andrews, looking utterly spent; there was A. B. Cook, who managed an expression somehow both grave and whimsical. Many strangers to me were present as well—representatives, I learned after, of Wicomico State College and the Maryland Historical Society.

  Oh, John. Chaplain Beille wound up his introduction with an uncertain comparison of Joe Morgan to the late Bishop James Pike, whose body had that day been found in the desert near the Dead Sea: both men were, well, Seekers, whose Search, um, had led them down Unconventional and Uncharted Paths, but, uh. John Schott took the podium, to Miss Stickles’s scarcely suppressed applause. With what my fiancé would later describe as Extreme Unctuousness, he spoke of having first hired Young Morgan at Wicomico in 1952; of having watched him “make a comeback” from the tragic loss of his wife in ’53 to his brilliant directorship of the historical society, thence to the first presidency of Tidewater Technical College and the supervision of its growth to Marshyhope State College and Marshyhope State University College; of Morgan’s then “returning the favour,” so to speak (a heavy chuckle here, returned by the company), of hiring him to be his vice-president and provost of the Faculty of Letters!

  Now Schott’s tone grew solemn. It was no secret that he and “Joe” had differed on many issues. But no one had regretted more than himself his worthy adversary’s departure from MSUC, on the very eve of its becoming MSU! It was a tragedy that the final year in the life of his protégé, as one might well call Morgan, had been as cloaked in obscurity as Bishop Pike’s: both of them, in Schott’s view, Casualties of Our Times! But whatever the contents of that tragic last chapter, it was ended: Joe was with his beloved wife now, on the Eastern Shore he cared so much for; and Schott knew in his heart that whatever his predecessor’s reservations about the Tower of Truth, there was no better loser than Joseph Patterson Morgan! He Schott had wanted him with us at the tower’s dedication, three weeks hence; he knew that Joe would give that edifice and Marshyhope his blessing, from Heaven!

  He closed with an equally exclamatory and unbecoming pitch for his own administration: skyrocketing enrollment figures, the massive building program, the great news (which he had been saving for the first university convocation on Monday the 15th, but could not resist leaking to us now) that approval was “all but finalized” in Annapolis for a seven-year plan to make MSU a proper City of Learning by 1976, perhaps even larger than the state’s current main campus at College Park! Morgan had hoped for 7,000 students: how gratified he would be at the prospect of 17,000, 27,000, eventually perhaps twice that number!

  On this
exquisite perversion of the verb to hope, and as Shirley Stickles sighed orgasmically in her seat, Schott turned the mike over to One Far More Eloquent Than Himself. A. B. Cook ascended the podium. There was a pause to adjust the P.A., which had been squealing as if in protest. Student ushers, deputized from the Freshman Orientation Committee, took the opportunity to seat latecomers, including, to my surprise, Ambrose. His attendance on Magda had been relieved by the twins and their girl- and boyfriends; she had insisted he join me. Looking about the room for me in vain, he was led to a seat just behind the Jacob Horners. Marsha glared and froze; Ambrose likewise, and desperately surveyed the audience again. Appalled, I pushed through to the empty seat next to him. Marsha’s expression could kill an unborn child; A. and I whispered accord on the matter of retreat to a rear seat. But Cook had launched into his versified eulogy and benediction.

  Our situation was too off-putting for me to be able now to reconstruct those verses. In his well-amplified baritone Cook made the same connexion (but unrelated to ourselves) that I’d made earlier, between the funeral of Marshyhope’s founder in February and its first president’s now: the predictable September/remember/glowing-ember rhymes. Observing that John Schott’s Fallen Forerunner had been “an historian” (rhymed with “not boring one”!), Cook invoked “what might be called the Anniversary View of History”: surely it was Significant that 7 September Was the birthday of that other J. P. Morgan, as well as of Queen Elizabeth I: wouldn’t our late founder have approved! (Unaware of our presence behind him, or of much else, Jacob Horner added sotto voce “the Comte de Buffon, Taylor Caldwell, Elia Kazan, Peter Lawford”; Marsha poked him.) Surely it was Significant, given Joseph Morgan’s professional interests, that today marked the anniversary of the launching in Baltimore, in 1797, of the frigate Constellation, soon to play a rôle in the cinematical reenactment of our history; that on this date in 1812 Napoleon defeated the Russian army at Borodino, and in 1822 Brazil’s claim of independence began the Portuguese Revolution. (“Right on!” I was surprised to hear Drew Mack say; the morning paper had reported release of fifteen Brazilian leftist political prisoners as ransom for the kidnapped U.S. ambassador.) And 7 September 1940 had marked the peak of the German air war against Great Britain, rhymes with fittin’. Horner nodded vigorously.