Quincy was just saying what he needed to say to keep me from leaving. He knew that he was feeding me lies. But at this point he was willing to say whatever to salvage our relationship.
As I stared into his eyes I went back in forth with myself trying to figure out what to do. I felt blindsided by all of this. I never saw this coming. I couldn’t help but think logical about all of this. My mind was telling me that he isn’t shit. But in my heart I couldn’t hide the fact that I loved him very much. He was my very own prince charming. He came when I least expected it, and swept me off my feet. He saved me from myself. He has been everything that I needed him to be. The life that we have built together was nothing short of amazing in this short amount of time that we have known each other. As I looked up at him he looked like he was holding his breath awaiting what I might say next. I stood up and just couldn’t face him. I just needed some time alone to figure all of this out.
So I said “I’m sorry I just can’t do this right now I need to get out of here.” I grabbed my bags and keys and headed towards the door again.
He jumped up and cut me off at the door as he said angrily “Jasmine, are you really going to believe some bitch’s word over mine? You’re not even going to give me the benefit of the doubt. Your still going to walk out on me even though I never once given you any reason not to believe me.”
I said aggravated “Oh so now she’s a bitch? But she wasn’t a bitch when you were fucking her though, and fucking her unprotected at that. Like seriously, Quincy, what the fuck were you thinking? Did you even consider the fact that she could end up pregnant? Or even worse if we didn’t use condoms you could have given me some type of disease. Please spare me with the dumb shit you’re talking right now. I said I’m leaving and that’s what I mean.”
He stood his ground refusing to move out of my way. He said “No you’re not going anywhere. You are going to sit your ass right here, and we are going to talk and work this out. You always want to run away, but today I’m not having it. I won’t let you leave like this. We’re not ending like this Jasmine. You said you would never leave me, and I need you to keep your word.”
I stared at him like he was out of his damn mind. When I say I’m done talking and I want to be left alone that is what I meant. I tried to stay calm so I said aggravated “Please move out of my way, Quincy.”
He shook his head no still refusing to move. Being in his presence was aggravated the shit out of me. The more I kept having to look at his face the more furious I became. I tried to push past him and he kept blocking me so I smacked him with as much force I could muster up. He looked at me with fire in his eyes. I had to admit I did smack him pretty hard, and I hurt my own hand in the process. After I smacked him he grabbed me, and began shaking me hard as hell. I screamed for him to let me go, but he refused, holding onto me tightly. I was kicking and screaming, as he picked me up, holding onto me tightly. I was able get myself out of his grasp, and all I saw was red as I punched him right in the face.
As soon as I did, he instantly drew his hand back, and backhanded me in the face. He hit me with so much force that I spun around crashing head first into a wall. As soon as I hit the wall I came crashing down onto the floor. I was stunned for a minute he hit me pretty hard. As soon as I was able to collect myself I couldn’t believe he had hit me. The whole left side of my face felt like it was on fire. I looked up at him with hurt, and disbelief in my eyes. I mean, I’m smart enough to know you should never put your hands on a man if you’re not ready for the possibility of him hitting you back. I guess I was nowhere near ready for this reaction, and by the look on his face I guess he couldn’t believe it either.
He immediately rushed to my side reaching down to help me. But I whispered, “Don’t touch me, Quincy.” I couldn’t stop the tears from streaming down my face. I never had a man hit me before. As I saw his hand coming down onto my face I had a flashback from when I was a little girl seeing my father abusing my mother. Growing up, witnessing my mom as a victim to domestic violence, traumatized me. I swore to myself I would never let that happen to me. I swore any man who ever put his hands on me would be dead before he even had the chance to apologize. But now here I am picking myself up off the floor. One of my biggest fears had just become my reality. I didn’t know what to do. The crazy side of me wanted to do my best to murder his ass.
I got up on my own feeling a little bit dizzy as I stumbled back on my feet. Q pleaded saying “Jasmine, I am so sorry, baby, you just kept hitting me, and I reacted. Please come here and let me look at your face. I didn’t mean it; I swear.”
I cried as I said “Please don’t, Q! Just don’t touch me! Just stay away from me.” I was in disbelief at what had just happened between us within 24 hours. How we ended up fighting one another, when last night we were making love. Through my tears I just said “It’s over, Quincy.”
He looked at me with disbelief as he said “I know that’s not how you really feel, Jasmine. You know I did not mean to hurt you. You hit me, and I reacted.”
I opened up the door about to walk out when he said “Jasmine, please don’t leave like this. I didn’t mean to hurt you; I swear to God I didn’t. You can’t always keep on running away from situations when you don’t wanna deal with them. Relationships are not easy. I love you, and I won’t let you walk away from me. Just please don’t end it like this. I know we can work this out.”
I ignored his pleas and proceeded to walk out of the door, unsure of what I was going to do next. As soon as I got inside my truck, I broke down crying and screaming. I was furious he had put his hands on me. I looked at my face and it was bright red. I felt my head and had a little bump on it from when I hit the wall. But after all the shit that just went down the first person that came to mind was Trey. Somehow all I wanted was for him to make it all better. He always knew what to say, and what to do when I was in hurting. He is the closet person that I have here who I knew I could trust when I’m a complete mess like I am now. So I decided to just go over to his house.
After I left the house, Q grabbed his blackberry and called Lisa. She was laughing when she answered. He said annoyed “What the fuck is wrong with you? Why did you call, and tell my girl all that bullshit? What part of I don’t wanna fuck with you anymore don’t you get?”
She said “I don’t give a fuck about her, or your relationship with her. I just thought she should know about the other woman in your life who is carrying your child. It was obvious you were never planning on telling her the truth about me. Plus nobody told her to pick up your damn phone anyway. She got exactly what she was looking for if you really want to be honest. Did you really think I was going to let you get away with embarrassing me at the club last night? I really wanna know how she took the news? She probably left your dumb ass didn’t she? That’s why you’re calling me crying.” She laughed after her last comment.
Quincy said annoyed “So how about you tell me what you thought was going to happen? You thought that I was going to come running to you once my girl left me? Well I guess you must be feeling stupid as fuck right now! Guess what I still don’t want you! Despite what you think you have done to destroy my relationship. My girl will be right back with her man soon enough, and you will still be on the outside looking in. I will never wife a chick like you! The sooner you accept it the better off we will both be.”
He was blatantly disrespecting her at this point. She changed her tune as she said upset “Listen, Quincy you don‘t need to be with her. Why wasn‘t I the one you decided to make your girl? I mean we did everything together. We are so good together. I was there when the girl you were in love with broke your heart. I mean how many other ways could I have been there for you, Quincy? Then you go and meet this new bitch, and now you just flip on me like I ain’t shit! Nigga, you must be crazy if you thought I was gonna take that shit lightly. I mean who is this bitch anyway? Where did she even come from, and how did she get you sprung so fast?”
Quincy remained quiet so she kept on
talking saying “Wow, so I just some random groupie chick to you now? So you spend thousands of dollars, and fuck all the groupies without a condom on? Because I am pretty sure that is just me you do that with. Please don’t try to play me. I will pull all your cards, and call your bluff. I have a lot of dirt on you, Quincy, that I’m sure wifey would just love to know about now. You think she hates you now after I’m done she will completely forget you even exist. I’m the wrong bitch to play with! I will make your life a living hell, and with this baby on the way take all of your money while I’m at it. You see I’m trying to be nice about this, but don’t turn me into the bitch that you know I could be!”
Quincy took a deep breath in trying to keep himself calm. Thinking about everything that she was saying made him want to choke her ass out. But in all reality this was all his fault. He fucked up by not using a condom with her. He just never took her as woman who would want a child. To be honest she never came across to him as the motherly type. All she cared about is material things, and what someone can do for her. Now she was pregnant with his child, and he knew she was going to make his life a living hell. The truth was he had been unfaithful. Jasmine was his woman, and Lisa was the mistress. Yes he does have some feelings for Lisa. He didn’t treat her like she was just a groupie that he fucked around with once in a while. But he never ever planned on ever making her his girl. He just couldn’t understand why she couldn’t just play her fucking position. They never even discussed relationships with one another. From the beginning they had an understanding that they were just having fun. No strings attached. Now all of a sudden she wants to declare her love for him. This could not have come at a worse time. He had just bought an engagement ring a week ago as he was planned on proposing to Jasmine. But after all the bullshit that just played out he had no clue if he would ever see her again let alone get her to marry him. There was no way possible that he would be able to divide up his time between two women. Not to mention this whole baby situation. Jasmine would never forgive him for having a baby on the side. If it turned out to be his baby then he would be a man and take care of his child.
After snapping out of his thoughts he said to her “Listen never was I the one who takes someone threatening me lightly. I’m not playing these games with you so do what you have to do. Just know your actions will most definitely have consequences. As I recall it I’m still paying your bills, and giving you the money you’re accustomed too. You stand to lose way more in this situation than I ever will. I’m man enough to admit all of my mistakes to my woman. That includes telling her the truth about you and me. If the baby turns out to be mine, then I will take care of my child. But you will get used to Jasmine being around, because soon she will be my wife. Understand we will never be together like that. I mean you knew what it was when we first started messing around with each other. You were never asking to be in a relationship with me before. Now all of a sudden you’re pregnant, and you want everything to change. Your motives are sounding real fucked up. You don’t really love me Lisa you love what I have to offer you.” After he said all of that she was quiet on the other end.
As far as she was concerned she deserved a ring from Quincy, not Jasmine. She played her position long enough. She even went to the extent to get him drunk enough that he wouldn’t care to pull out. They had sex plenty of times with no condom, but he never wanted to pull out when he was drunk. She knew if he was sober he definitely wouldn’t have slipped up like he did that night. She had planned that night perfectly. Anything he asked of her she did for him. She let him live out all of his sexual fantasies with her, and never said no. She thought that he would eventually come around, but not go into the arms of another woman. She made up in her mind that Jasmine had to go, and she would make sure that it happened. But she also knew that she shouldn’t piss Q off anymore. Hell she was angry but far from stupid. She depended on him for way too much.
So she said “Alright, I’m sorry, baby. I guess I’m just a little bit upset that you fell in love with another woman, and didn’t even find it necessary to tell me about her, Q. You’re treating me like I don’t matter to you, and that’s hurtful, Quincy. But regardless of what you want to say, you and I both know this baby is yours. You’re going to have to deal with me when it comes to this child whether you like it or not!”
Q was pissed off at this point so he just said “Listen I don’t need to explain anything to you about what I do, or who I choose to bring into my life. You were never my woman. So like I said get used to Jasmine because she is here to stay. I’m not the only one who has something to lose if you decide to start getting reckless with your mouth!”
She had enough of him so she said “Good luck getting back in good with wifey Quincy.” After that she hung up.
Q walked over to the refrigerator and took out a Corona. As he laid down on the couch, Jasmine’s dog, Lyric, hopped up onto his lap. She had the saddest eyes looking towards the door as if she was wondering where her mommy went.
He said to the dog “I know you miss mommy, Lyric, but she will be back. I hope she will be back.”
He rubbed her head as he turned on the TV, and tried to watch sports center to clear his mind. He knew that the situation with Lisa was far from over this was only the beginning. As he sipped his Corona he hoped that Jasmine would come back home eventually. She just needed some time alone to calm down. The ring he had bought was a beautiful princess cut white and canary yellow diamond engagement ring he had customized just for her. Engraved inside the ring it read “I will never let you fall.”
He was beginning to question the idea if he was really ready to get married. After what had just happened he wasn’t even sure if he was ready to be the husband that Jasmine deserved. He couldn’t believe that he let his anger get the best of him where he put his hands on her. He never hit a woman a day in his life, and he was feeling like shit for what he had just done. Every time he closed his eyes the look on Jasmine’s face after he hit her haunted him. He cringed just remembering the look on her face. That look of hurt made him sick to his stomach. He never wanted to be the cause of any of her pain. All he ever wanted to do since the first day they met was love her. Nothing made him happier than to be the reason she smiled. But in reality Jasmine had the ability to make him run on pure emotion. This is how he knew he was deeply in love with her. No woman ever made him feel the way that she could make him feel. If she wasn’t the one then he didn’t know if he would ever meet the one. Just the thought of never seeing her again was enough for him to get serious about everything that she deserved. He would do whatever it took to bring her back home to him. He needed to see the ring he bought placed onto her finger, and her walking down the aisle so that he could make her his forever.
I sat outside of Trey’s apartment feeling nervous as hell about going inside. Out of all places that I could have possibly gone here I am. All I knew was he would always take care of me. I went back and forth with myself debating if seeing Trey in the mindset that I’m currently in is a good thing. My phone just wouldn’t stop ringing; Q wouldn’t let up. I kept sending him to voicemail. I needed someone to vent to, so I decided to just go inside. What’s the worst that could possibly happen? I just hoped he still lived in the same apartment since I haven’t been here in a while. This place immediately brought back a lot of memories for me. The last time I was here, I was running out of here with my heart in shambles. This time, I’m here and another man is the cause of my pain.
I glanced over myself in my compact mirror, and I looked a complete mess. I couldn’t go in there looking like this. So I wiped away the tears that stained my cheeks, and fixed my hair. I tried my best to hide the side of my face that started to bruise slightly. So I combed my hair over that side of my face. I was about to get out of my truck, but I froze up. I still had so many mixed emotions when it came to Trey. So I sat there for a minute holding a debate in my mind. I wasn’t sure that going in there would be a good idea. I mean he could have female company, or he could even sl
am the door in my face after our last exchange of words a while ago. I just didn’t want to leave here feeling any more hurt than what I already was. After about 10 minutes of sitting outside his apartment I decided to just go inside. At this point I felt like this day couldn’t possibly get any worse. The worse he could do was slam the door in my face. So I got out of my truck nervous as hell as I walked inside his building.
As I got up to his door I knocked lightly hoping that he wouldn’t even hear me so I could have an excuse to leave. I swear it felt like my heart was going to jump out of my chest I was so damn nervous. I heard him call from the other side asking who it was. I spoke softly saying “It’s Jasmine.”
There was a small pause, and then he opened the door asking again who it was, as if he didn’t believe it was really me. But when he opened the door, and saw it was me standing there, he looked shocked. After seeing his reaction I wasn’t sure how he felt about seeing me standing here. I wasn’t sure if he was mad, glad, or could care less.
“I know I shouldn’t have come here unannounced, but I really had nowhere else to go. I needed somewhere and someone. But I completely understand if you don’t want to see me.”
I was stammering on my words I was a nervous wreck. He just stared at me without saying a word. At that moment I knew that he probably didn’t want to see me so I said “I’m sorry I should just go.”
I turned around to leave and the tears were already starting to form in my eyes. As I was about to walk away he grabbed me softly by the arm to stop me, and I winced slightly in pain. My arm was hurting from when Q grabbed me.
He said concerned “What happened, Jasmine? Did he do something to you? What’s wrong with your arm?”
As soon as he said that I busted out into tears as I said “We just got into this really big fight. He grabbed me really hard to stop me from packing up my things. Then he wouldn’t let me leave so I punched him in the face. I guess he reacted to me hitting him, and he hit me in the face.”
Running Away From Love Page 16
