Beyond the Hurt

by Akilah Trinay

  “Do you remember our conversation in the hospital?” she questioned applying pressure to her wound.

  “Yes. I do.” I remembered that heart-to-heart like it was yesterday.

  “The woman that I told you, your father dated in high school and beyond; well we had a small altercation. She tried to attack me and I shoved her to the floor.”

  “You was fighting, Mama?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Why were they even in the same location? Her story didn’t make any sense to me. “What? How? When?” My stuttering made my confusion more obvious.

  “It was your father’s bright idea for me to go to her salon for her to do my hair for our anniversary.”

  I was so anxious to get answers I just cut her off midway through her explanation. “So you mean to tell me that, my father advised you to go down to the salon and get your hair done by the other woman? In what world is that a good idea? Even I know that was a dumb decision.” The story was extremely outrageous I had to speak to her as if she were my roommate Sarah.

  “In the world where a wife does as her husband instructs.” My father bogarted his way into the conversation as he often did their relationship. He entered the kitchen, went straight for the refrigerator and popped the cap of his last Heineken. I wanted to jump up and run into his arms, but I opted not to give my father my attention. I honestly didn’t know if it was safe yet. I would officially greet him when she finished and the air was clear. My mom simply ignored his presence and continued.

  “The woman, whose name is Raquel, has a son named Charles—the one I told you about. I walked in on Raquel having a conversation with Calvin Rogers and I insinuated to Charles that he was his biological father. Well, Rocky didn’t like that and attacked me.” She placed the pile of chopped potatoes in a large bowl filled with cold water to keep preserved while she finished chopping the additional veggies for the stew.

  “You had no business saying anything to that woman. We had an agreement.” Edmond hissed at her as he walked over and gave me a kiss on my forehead with his wet beer lips. I wiped the residue from my face.

  “You had no business sleeping with her either, but that didn’t stop you now, did it?” I somehow no longer felt comfortable in the room. They had so much healing to do. I was relieved when Samson walked through the door to join the commotion in the kitchen.

  “Samson! You’re home.” I popped up and raced over to embrace him. Initially, it felt awkward, but I quickly got over myself and savored the moment.

  “Ewww. Get off of me!”

  “You know you like it!” He tried his best to act like he didn’t want my love, but I knew the truth. “Where are you two coming from?”

  “We were out. That’s all yo’ big head needs to know!”

  “Whatever!” I rolled my eyes at him. “What was so important that I had to come all the way out here?”

  “I just wanted to see my family together again to celebrate this wondrous occasion.” My father poked out his chest with a huge grin on his face. Charlene quickly cut her eyes over to Edmond looking for an explanation. She knew that was not the reason for them calling her back home.

  “What occasion?” I asked in confusion.

  I watched as my father approached my mother and got down on one knee. She grabbed her chest and began to pant. He pulled out a beautiful, double-French-set halo diamond band platinum engagement ring. As a tear rolled down his face, I witnessed history in the making.

  “Charlene Tucker, my wife, my lover, my best friend, I love you with all that is in me. You are the only woman for me. I want to spend every day for the rest of my life making you happy. Will you make me the happiest man in the world and marry me? And this time, I will give you the wedding you deserve.” He glared into her eyes awaiting her response.

  She turned to us, to get our reaction. We nodded profusely in our endorsement of her decision. She turned back to Edmond and exhaled. She wiped the tears from her eyes and closed them for a moment. She thought about all they had endured over the years and the recent events. She opened her eyes and smiled. “YES!”

  Edmond jumped up and embraced her in his arms. Samson pulled out the twelve long-stem roses he hid just outside of the kitchen and presented them to our mother. She was so overjoyed. She had waited all her life for this moment. I finally understood their relationship and her patience. She would have waited a lifetime for him to come around; unfortunately, it had to come through an abundance of pain and despair.

  “Everything is taken care of,” he whispered to her as he held her in his arms.

  Although, everything didn’t go as planned, it ultimately was the plan. And I was elated that they called me all this way to experience it.

  My father released my mother and came toward me with one additional red long-stem rose. Again, he lowered himself down on one knee, grabbed my hand and placed it between his. “Debra, I love you. You are my baby girl. I know how you may feel about the miscarriage and I am here for you.” I immediately wrapped my arms around my daddy, letting him know he didn’t need to say another word. He tenderly kissed my forehead and just held me in his arms. Who was I to think he would be so cruel? My daddy loved me and I knew it all along.

  Chapter 19

  The ambience of the church was filled with distress and worry felt by those present to witness the home-going celebration of Elijah Edward Naples. The oversized Oakwood church doors welcomed all the parishioners to remember his life and legacy. There rested a lack of certainty in the matter regarding the motive for his murder, the altercation or his assailant; yet all surrendered their inquisition to pay respect to him and the family.

  The church was nestled between 85th Avenue and E Street. Although, based in a rough neighborhood it was founded upon the vision of maintaining a facility for the local congregation, as well as, the surrounding community, to have a comfortable place to worship. Elijah, who in the latter half of his life, had taken a leave of absence from the church to figure out life on his own; still kept his membership and every so often gave money toward the ministry. He was raised in the church and knew the Lord as his personal Savior. However, in his opinion, the years of feeling the tedium and demands, of the Christian life, he distanced himself from what he knew to be his saving grace.

  Growing up, his mother would not allow a Sunday to pass without attending. He sang in the children’s choir and assisted with the usher board whenever needed. The moment his mother felt he had reached the age of understanding, she backed off of him to give him the opportunity to serve the Lord freely. His dedication didn’t match hers; but he attended as often as he felt necessary. He believed that as long as he was good to people, he would receive the same in return.

  The service was set to begin promptly at 11:00am. His family and friends sullenly made their way into the winsome sanctuary, unaccepting of the reality that lay before them. The stillness was piercing. Flowers, bouquets and floral arrangements plastered the floors, walls and casket. The choir draped in their Sunday morning choir ensemble, silently soothed the spirits of the people with melodies from heaven. Elijah’s mother thought it best to have a closed casket funeral. The beauty of the boy she remembered, as her only son, was stripped away by the bullets that penetrated his head and body, leaving him unrecognizable.

  Raquel Simmons, Lydia Brown, Jamie Lynn Johnson, The Tucker family and others filed in the church quickly locating open seats prior to the commencement of the service. People came from near and far; the need for the use of the overflow balcony area told the story of the lives that he had touched in his time on earth. C.P. Bannon Mortuary took much of the burden off of Mrs. Naples who had to endure the entire process with only the assistance of her two daughters, since her late husband was overtaken by drug overdose when Elijah was a small boy. Times were often difficult taking on the responsibility of being the sole provider and steward over her children. She sacrificed her own life and desires, hoping that her children had the best and did not go without. It was the reason Elijah hustled
so hard. He hated to see his mother in pain. Her stress became his stress; therefore, he stepped up whenever required.

  Lance and Charles adorned in their all-black suits and dark Ray Ban sunshades served as pallbearers for the service along with a few of Elijah’s cousins and childhood friends. They positioned themselves around the casket, offering up silent prayers for their brother. The two still uneasy about the entire unfolding of events, agreed to put the search and seizure of the one responsible for his murder behind them. The word on the street conveyed that the infamous Calvin Rogers had exterminated his killer anyway. Lance never mentioned to Charles about Darnise’s semi-confession, because she was in jail. He figured that one day they would have that talk over plenty of liquor.

  The service was short and sweet. The preacher who eulogized Elijah spoke immensely on forgiveness and transformation. His words pricked every heart in the building. Charles couldn’t help but to feel the conviction of how he treated his own father. When he heard the news that he had been murdered, he had no emotion, no connection. However, he made a promise to himself to be like Edmond and be there for his own when that day came around.

  No different, Lance felt the conviction as well and finally turned his life over to Christ. He knew the error of his ways for a long time and the angel in the form of Jamie Lynn put all things in perspective for him. He loved the way she loved him and he recognized it could only be divine and wanted to love her the same in return. He began to inquire about how to get that love. The answer came directly to him during the sermon when the preacher spoke of the love that God had for his only begotten son. The fact that Elijah had brought numerous people together who were broken in Spirit translated to Lance that maybe God did care about him and had a plan for his life that was not his own.

  As the choir glorified the Lord in psalms of Tramaine Hawkin’s “Goin’ Up Yonder,” the visiting guests participated in the processional around the church to pay their final respect to Elijah.

  After making her way around the front of the church, Charlene immediately spotted Lydia and made it her business to approach her.

  “Well hello there, Lydia. It has been a loooong time. I didn’t even know you were still living around these parts. You must have a new address and phone number.” Charlene sarcastically remarked and flashed her freshly cut diamond ring in her face to get her attention. They constantly maintained a friendly competition between the two of them ever since they were small children. Charlene was fairly more attractive than Lydia and received most of the attention from the boys around the neighborhood. Lydia despised that part about her. Lydia was no ugly woman, but she often fell to the shadows when Charlene came on the scene. For Lydia, she yearned to beat Charlene in something. They competed in fashion and even school. However, once Charlene met Edmond, she began to drift away from Lydia, choosing her man over her best friend.

  “Char, stop all the nonsense! I called you several times and you ignored me. However, I am glad to see you are doing well. Are you still with that no-good-of-a-man Edmond?” she rolled her eyes ignoring all attempts for her to acknowledge her shiny ring she kept forcing in her face.

  “I sure am. In fact, we are renewing our vows in the next couple of months. You should come to the ceremony. That is, if you are not too busy.” Charlene requested, genuinely wanting her presence there. The time that had been lost within their time apart seemed minimal now that they were reconnected.

  “Send me an invitation, I would love to come! You and Ed have come a long way, especially with the Raquel hiccups, but I am glad to see you are happy. Lord knows every woman deserves happiness.”

  “Mama, I’m about to get out of here and take Jamie Lynn home to change before we go to Mrs. Naples’ house for the repast. Are you ok? Do you need anything?” Lance requested, gently embracing her from behind. He didn’t even acknowledge the woman she was engaging with. His time was limited and Jamie Lynn kept complaining during the service about being hungry and he needed to see to it that she was taken care of.

  “Mama?” Charlene questioned, her face crumpled up in confusion. This was definitely headline news to her ears. She was clueless about any form of pregnancy. The last experience she shared with her friend with regard to pregnancy had been when Lydia agreed to be her surrogate years ago. The in-vitro fertilization attempt was unsuccessful and she didn’t hear much from her after.

  “Hold up one moment, Lance. I want to introduce you to someone.” She presented her son before Charlene, who couldn’t help but feel an immediate connection to him. “Lance, this is an old friend of mine, Charlene Tucker. She is Edmond’s wife.” She stated, putting emphasis on Edmond’s wife to remind him of exactly who she was connected to.

  “Oh! You are Charles’ Pops’ wife? It’s nice to meet you.” He offered his hand to her.

  “You are a very handsome young man. How old are you?” Charlene asked inquisitively with a raised eyebrow.

  “I’m twenty-seven.” Lance stood firm with his shoulders back feeling like a grown man in her presence.

  “Oh, really? Who is the lucky man that is your father?” Charlene glanced over to Lydia to read her inner thoughts and glanced back over at Lance, inspecting him from head to toe. She shook her head and shrugged off where her thoughts were taking her. It’s impossible. It can’t be! She thought to herself. No. She wouldn’t do that.

  “Well, Mrs. Tucker, it was nice meeting you.” He stepped in closer and whispered in Lydia’s ear. “Mama, I’m gonna go ahead and get out of here. I will stop by the house later to check on you. And thanks again for hooking me up with Jamie.” He kissed Lydia on her cheek and exited the sanctuary.

  “I know what you might be thinking, Charlene and he is not your son. I got pregnant a few months later after the procedure didn’t take. I didn’t want to call you because I knew you wouldn’t take it well. Besides, you were caught up in all of the Edmond drama, and I honestly didn’t want to be involved. Also for your information, his father left a long time ago. As fast as he came into my life, he was out of my life.” Lydia responded, hoping it would be enough to get her off of her case.

  “Sure you didn’t. It doesn’t matter anyway. I have two beautiful children right over there and I’m finally at a place of happiness.” She glanced over at Debra and Samson and smiled. At this point, she was content with it all. “Let me get your information, so I can send you that invite.” They exchanged numbers and vowed to keep in contact.

  Since her interaction with Lydia went smoothly and she was in the spirit of forgiveness, Charlene made her way around to the opposite side of the sanctuary to Raquel to smooth things over. There were still a few people left in the church, making it the best time to get a few words in. She needed her to first and foremost understand that Edmond would no longer be her go-to man for help anymore. Raquel also needed her to know that the agreement that for so long loomed over her head, that kept her in silence, was lifted and no longer an issue in her world.

  “Excuse me, Raquel.” Charlene lightly tapped Raquel on her shoulder. She sat quietly on the pew and didn’t shift her body in Charlene’s direction. She merely stared straight and briefly nodded to acknowledge her presence. “I am truly sorry for your loss. But it was going to happen sooner or later.” Raquel maintained her posture, eyes locked on the view ahead of her. She didn’t want to allow Charlene to get in her head with her wild antics and jabber. Charlene continued unfazed by her stoic demeanor. “The life he lived was reckless and I am sure whoever did this to Calvin was just as dirty as he was.” Raquel slightly shifted her body again in reaction to her obliviousness. It hit her at that moment that she had no clue as to the events that led up to his death. Charlene was just as out of the loop as always. In her mind, Edmond still didn’t trust her enough to let her all the way in.

  Raquel coughed in her hands and cleared her throat as she eased out a “Thank you.”

  “Let me get straight to the point. I really want to thank you for loving Edmond the way you did. Believe it or not
, the relationship that carried on between you and my husband under my nose and behind my back put a lot of things in perspective for me. I was selfish at times. But now I see the error of my ways and ultimately, I got the better part of Ed, and I have you to thank for that.”

  Raquel slowly turned an acute angle degree, took a deep breath and swallowed hard, “I thank God I have grown. Although I want to reach out and touch you in the worse way; I won’t give you that satisfaction because we are in God’s house. I lost my cool at the salon the other day, so I apologize for that; but Ed will forever be in my life whether you like it or not, ring or no ring. Let’s just agree to be cordial with one another.” Charlene gave her a slight smile and patted her on her shoulder as to patronize her response. “As soon as the wedding glow wears off, he’ll be back trying to rekindle old flames. Do you know where he was last night?” Raquel shot back under her breath.

  “I know what you are trying to do and I’m not falling for it this time.” Charlene applied her best effort to maintain her composure and show Raquel that she didn’t matter to her any longer. The words that so frequently used to ruffle her feathers would not faze her, she took a deep strong breath in to steady her breathing. What do I have to worry about? She thought to herself. Edmond is mine. He loves me. He comes home to me. He pays my bills. He takes care of my children! As her thoughts rapidly cut through her subconscious, she lost control. “If you ever touch my man again…”