Dex (Kinky Shine #1)

by Stephanie Witter

  Maxen and Otis left after Beckett without a word. Just a nod for me, Floyd, and Harley. I should go too, but I didn’t move from my chair. I fucked up. I sighed and the anger I had present minutes ago left at once. I was exhausted, so fucking exhausted.

  “Dex?’’

  I looked up to my manager. “I don’t have a single thing written for the album, but you know that already.’’

  He deflated and rubbed at his eyes. I felt bad because he was counting on me too. I risked a glance at Harley, but she was already fixing me with her green eyes. She didn’t look disappointed, but rather sympathetic. I didn’t know what to make of that.

  I stood up and scratched my jaw. “I’m trying, Floyd. But it doesn’t click anymore.’’ My voice was gruff. I hated showing that weakness, I hated telling them that I was fucking up the band. I wasn’t doing my part of the job and I didn’t know why I couldn’t. This fucking block came out of nowhere and was sticking around like glue.

  “Maybe we should think about getting someone on board to write a song with you. It could kick start you.’’

  I shook my head and then shrugged. I hated the idea of someone else getting in on the band and writing something for us. But at the same time, I wasn’t exactly in a position to refuse for much longer. “Give me a few more days.’’

  “We’ll ask the guys what they think next week, but I know you can do it, Dex. I know.’’ Floyd’s faith in me gutted me. He believed in me more than I did in myself. I didn’t feel the drive to write anymore, didn’t feel the words flowing, didn’t hear that beat in my head. There was nothing anymore.

  “Alright, see ya, Floyd.’’ I turned to Harley who was looking up at me, her face clouding over. “Harley.’’ I walked out, my feet heavy and my heart sinking. My blood became colder just as the warmth I had felt in that office quickly deserted me. And my cock deflated completely. I wanted to turn around and grab Harley and at the same time, I couldn’t leave fast enough. That woman had me confused more than she should and more than she probably knew.

  “Dex! Wait!’’

  I turned around, bumping into a young man probably doing an internship here. I quickly apologized and ignored his awestruck look when he realized who I was. Instead, I was watching Harley walking to me, her legs bared by her mid-thigh brown skirt making me hard again.

  “Do you have something planned?’’ she asked me hesitantly, her voice even more shy than usual when talking to me.

  I blinked and looked around, praying that the guys were loitering around somewhere to save me. I couldn’t resist her draw to me on my own, but I couldn’t get any closer to her either. It was impossible and not only because she was working with us or because she was Floyd’s daughter. She was a woman I was insanely attracted to. Fucking her was out of the question.

  “If you have, I get it.’’ She shook her head and bit on her lower lip. My eyes zeroed in on it and goosebumps covered my forearms. Fucking goosebumps like I was back to my teenage years with a crush. “I shouldn’t have asked, really.’’ She smiled ruefully at me and made a move to turn back around, but I stopped her.

  Before my brain made the thinking thing it’s supposed to do, I gently grabbed her shoulder and stopped her there, tethering her to me with this simple move. Her heat seeped into me. Her soft skin had me ready to pounce. I didn’t remember ever feeling like this with a woman. I swallowed.

  “I don’t have anything planned,’’ I whispered and my voice sounded like sex.

  She shivered and her green eyes turned a deeper shade as her pupils dilated. Fuck. Fuck.

  “Let’s grab a coffee, then.’’

  HARLEY

  Sitting in a Starbucks with Dex was pretty much the weirdest experience of my life. People kept glancing our way, trying to see his face better this or that way and then whispering excitedly among them. So far, two people got enough guts to walk up to him for a picture. He complied good-naturedly even though he wasn’t very loquacious.

  But now, the bustle wasn’t the same and I had to find a way to talk to him instead of being tongue tied like this. It was ridiculous. I was working with the man and had a fight with him but I chose now to be shy.

  I cleared my throat and took a sip of my iced coffee. “Do you know what could have caused that block?’’

  He scratched his cheek and shook his head once. “No clue.’’ He sipped his black coffee and put it back down on the table. “At first, I thought it was exhaustion after our world tour, but then it became obvious that wasn’t it.’’

  “Maybe you put too much pressure on yourself.’’

  “Was it why you wanted to have coffee? Talking about why I’m fucking up Kinky Shine?’’ His voice went back to his icy tone, but I didn’t let it deter me this time. I was starting to see it was a defense mechanism.

  “I thought that maybe talking about it with someone who isn’t invested in the band would help alleviate you of some stuff. If I’m wrong, I’m sorry.’’ I traced the rim of my mug and glanced around us to make sure no one was listening. “I think you have too much on your shoulders. You’re not the only one responsible for the music.’’

  He leaned over the table, his face getting closer to me. I breathed in and I had to force myself to not close my eyes when his woodsy cologne hit my nose. “I am the one who writes the lyrics and I find the first base of the melody. The guys butt in to tweak things with me, but if I don’t come up with something…’’

  “I think I remember that Take Me, Kiss Me was written by the band as a whole, not just you, Dex.’’

  He shrugged stiffly and rubbed at his temples, visibly tense. “I had written the other eleven songs on that album, Harley. I am the one who gives the band that drive, I am the one supposed to keep my shit together and keep us on the right track, I am the one who comes up with most of our material because I’m supposed to be one who can easily write a fucking song. Fuck, Amplified Love was written in twenty minutes. It took me a few hours to get the basic chords right. I’ve had three months to come up with one fucking song and I got nothing.’’

  I had the urge to grab his hand and squeeze it for comfort, but I didn’t know how he’d react. He’d probably leave at once, thinking that I was trying to get in his pants. I entwined my fingers on the table in front of me instead. “I’m just saying Kinky Shine is composed of four men, not just one. If you keep on thinking that you’re going to screw everything, then it’s not going to help you write and compose.’’ I offered him a shaky smile. “I know you can write, Dex. Maybe you need a new inspiration, new experiences.’’

  His eyes left mine and slid lower to stop at my mouth. He probably didn’t know what he was doing, lost in his own thoughts, but it drove me crazy. I craved running my tongue along my lower lip, I was dying to bite on it and…No, I needed to stop. I was blindsided because he was Dex Bowers and I had been a Kinky Shine fan for a while now. I was only attracted because of that. It took me twenty-three years to start acting like a groupie, though. It couldn’t be anything else.

  “I can’t,’’ he said, shaking his head and standing up suddenly.

  I blinked at him. This man gave me whiplash. What did I do? I replayed my words and didn’t find anything remotely offending. And this time around I didn’t say something that could be mistaken as an innuendo or a bad line.

  “Dex?’’

  “No…I…’’ He didn’t finish his sentence and left Starbucks.

  I watched his stiff back and shoulders as he exited the place and I slumped in my chair before another bout of annoyance hit me. I stood up abruptly, almost spilling over my mug still full and I ran out after Dex.

  *

  DEX

  Someone grabbed my elbow and I jerked away, my heart beating hard. I squared my shoulders and looked behind me, ready to fight if someone was trying to mug me right in daylight in the middle of the busy street or if a damn paparazzo stalked me. Now wasn’t the time to fuck with me.

  But when I turned around and looked down to meet Harley
’s angry green eyes, I shivered. She followed me.

  “Maybe it’s cool for you to leave out of the blue without a reason, but I will not support that attitude. What was it?’’

  “Don’t. I’m sorry for leaving like that, but—‘’

  “Don’t bullshit me, Dex!’’

  Her voice went up another octave and I cringed. Not that her voice wasn’t pleasant, but I didn’t want to make a scene right in the middle of an LA street where anyone could record us or take pictures to post on some gossip rag and social media.

  “Keep it down,’’ I said through clamped teeth.

  “I don’t care if someone hears me.’’ She released my elbow and crossed her arms over her chest, full of attitude. She was a real spitfire and it attracted me even more. My cock let me know without a smidgen of doubt.

  “Well, I care.’’ I glanced around, but fortunately people didn’t seem to recognize me just yet. The sunglasses must help that, but my tattoos would give me away in no time. I walked around her toward the side of the street and leaned against the wall, facing her as she stopped right in front of me, her arms still crossed. “What are you looking for, Harley?’’

  “I…’’ she trailed off and sighed, some of her anger evaporating before my eyes. “I don’t get you. One minute you’re fine and we talk and the next you up and leave. What I want to know is what triggers that attitude. It’s like a switch is pushed.’’

  “Aren’t you here on payroll for the label? You don’t have to get me.’’

  She pursed her lips and looked away, but I saw the flash of hurt on her face, twisting her traits before she disciplined her face again. “Nice.’’ She uncrossed her arms and pushed away a few strands sticking to her face, right in the left corner of her mouth. “I’m sorry for being human and trying to seek some kind of understanding with you. Believe me, Dex, it’s not going to happen again.’’ She adjusted her big brown leather purse on her shoulder and extended her hand to shake it. She wanted to prove to me that we would be back to square one, but it was impossible. Maybe she was the kind of woman able to put into folders her emotions, but I didn’t where she was concerned. That’s why I had needed to put some distance with her before I did something I didn’t know if I could follow through or not. And honestly, I didn’t know her, couldn’t trust her like that yet. But my cock didn’t understand that. My whole fucking body wasn’t understanding I needed distance, I needed to keep a safety zone around me.

  But she was still there with her hand held up in the air between us, waiting for me to shake it. And I didn’t.

  “Harley…’’ There was a fucking warning in her name, but she didn’t budge, didn’t bat an eye. But she did stop breathing for a second and her green eyes darkened again. My whole body shivered at her reaction. I inhaled and I didn’t smell the traffic exhaustion or other smells associated with LA. No, what I smelt was her vanilla perfume.

  I pressed harder in the wall, the concrete biting into my back. I clenched my fists and kept my eyes locked with hers. I traced my lower lip with my tongue and her eyes went down to my mouth. My heart tripled in beat and a low growl escaped me. It couldn’t be heard with the bustling noise of the city, but it shocked me. I couldn’t remember the last time I had such a reaction.

  When I thought she’d take a step toward me, she took one backward and away from me. Her eyes widened and she blushed. “I guess this time I should be the one leaving,’’ she said in a small voice, her words stumbling into each other’s .

  “No.’’ What the fuck was I saying?

  “What? I mean,’’ she shook her head. “I’m leaving.’’

  I grabbed her shoulders and crowded her space before I realized what I was doing. Her scent enveloped me, enticed me. The thin material of her top was soft under my fingers, almost like nothing was separating me from her body. If I took a half step toward her I would feel her perfect breasts against my chest. I clenched my jaw and tried to calm my labored breathing. After a few seconds without moving she tilted her head upward to look at me and I was fucked. I thought I had been before that, but now, now I was lost to the sensations she was awakening in me, sensations I thought was gone.

  Her lips, lush and parted called out to me. Her cheeks coloring more and more into a deeper red had me ready to damn myself for this show of innocence. Her eyes, bright and yet getting glassier showed nothing akin to innocence and that made me ready to come in my fucking pants. She was a contradiction and I would have never thought it’d be so tantalizing.

  “What are you doing?’’ she whispered and her breath brushed my neck. I closed my eyes, my lips parted on a low moan. Fuck. What was she doing to me?

  “Push me away. Now.’’

  I kept my eyes closed to better feel the brush of her breathing on my skin. My cock was pushing against my zipper and it was fucking painful. I wanted to squeeze myself and jerk off to find a release, but I couldn’t. We were on a street in broad daylight.

  I waited and waited and nothing happened. She kept on breathing irregularly and didn’t push me away.

  So I did the only thing I could; I opened my eyes.

  HARLEY

  I couldn’t mistake this, this time around. He was attracted. Dex Bowers, the man who had never been pictured with a woman over the past four years since he became famous was attracted to me. Me!

  His dark brown eyes looked intense, more so than ever before. I shivered and I didn’t try and cover it. His hands on my shoulders squeezed tighter almost to pain and I let out a gasp. Warmth spread in my stomach and then lower. I wanted to fidget on my feet, but I was anchored to the concrete. I didn’t want to disturb this thing, this moment. Nothing could make me risk it.

  I swallowed thickly and slowly brought my hands to his bare forearms. He tensed right before my pale skin went into contact with his tattooed one, but I didn’t stop. Even then, I couldn’t stop. Only he could.

  Right before my skin touched his, I contemplated the difference in my dainty hands and his thick forearms covered in dark tattoos intricately laced into each other. But when my skin finally touched his, everything went haywire.

  My heart took off in my chest and this time around it felt like a hummingbird trapped in there. My blood wasn’t just rushing to my head and making me light-headed, but it also burnt me from the inside until the warmth there became a fire nothing could extinguish. I was consumed with only innocent touches. But I knew it, the intent underneath, the tension between us was what had me going crazy. Nothing was innocent in the way he looked at me, in the way his hands squeezed my shoulders and I couldn’t help but wonder if he would be as intense and physically demanding as I thought he was.

  I bit on my lip and trailed my hands up his arms, feeling his muscles bunch under my palms. I wanted to kiss his arms, to wrap myself around him and feel all of his big body plastered against mine, crowding me until I couldn’t breathe anymore.

  “Harley.’’ My name sounded broken in his smoky voice, strangling him.

  I squeezed his hard biceps and quietly moaned. Just from touching his arms. It was scary, insane to feel so much when doing so little.

  “I can’t push you away.’’

  “You fucking should.’’

  “Why?’’

  We were breathing the same air, now closer than before. My breasts brushed against his chest every time I took a deep breath. It was a tease and his eyes flared a hard glint. He had a dangerous sex appeal to him and I was eating it up, drowning in it.

  “Because I can’t deal with this.’’ His voice was lower than before, deeper than when he sang his songs full of lust and decadence.

  “With what?’’ My brain was full of fog and all I could focus on was his mouth and my need to close the small space, to go on my tiptoes and kiss him.

  “Do you feel that fucking attraction between us?’’ he asked darkly, his smoky voice making me shiver once again. His big hands traveled down my arms and to my waist. He held onto me tightly. “Do you feel that need right here, ri
ght now as if you can’t fucking wait to let me fuck you senseless until we’re both spent and unable to move a fucking inch anymore?’’

  I gulped and my eyes widened more than ever. His smirk appeared then and his dimple popped, blindsiding me again. I wanted to kiss that dimple too. “Yes.’’

  “That’s what I can’t deal with, Harley.’’ His throat worked and then, closing his eyes he kissed my forehead. He kept his lips there a few seconds longer and I registered the feel of his lips, the way his whiskers brushed my skin and the way his scent overwhelmed me completely to obliterate any other smell.

  And then, when I thought he would reach down to my mouth, he pulled back and forced me to break all contact with him. He pushed me away. “Wha…’’

  “I can’t. I want to, but I can’t.’’

  “I don’t understand.’’ I wanted to slap myself at hearing my voice coming out so weak, so shaky. But he did a number on me and I was left completely out of sync. My body felt all wrong, the sounds and smells seemed inadequate. I hugged myself tightly, trying to bring comfort to myself when my heart started sinking to my feet. He didn’t want me like I did him or else he wouldn’t have stopped whatever was about to happen. I had forgotten myself and all common sense, that’s what he did to me when all I did was tempt him, but not enough to sway him.

  “There’s nothing to understand.’’ He shook his head, maybe to clear his mind and then nodded at me as if to say goodbye, but I wouldn’t let him go just yet. Not when nothing made any sense.

  “Is this your thing? You turn on a woman and then leave with some vague words.’’

  “Think whatever you want. I’m out.’’ He turned around abruptly, but not before I caught the anger on his face at my accusation.

  This time around, I let him walk away, still hugging myself while I watched him stalking down the street and back to the label’s building where he had probably parked his car. I didn’t know in which universe I could have entertained the idea of something happening between Dex and me. Not only was he a famous rockstar and I was only a blogger, but we clashed repeatedly. Yet, the attraction was there. I knew he felt it, but he denied himself and me. But why? Before I had met him, I thought he held some mysteries, but now he was a complex code and I didn’t have a key to decrypt him.