Calling Me Home

by Louise Bay

  Published by Louise Bay 2015

  Copyright © 2015 Louise Bay. All rights reserved

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with or sponsored by the trademark owners.

  ISBN - 978-1-910747-18-6

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Epilogue

  Series Playlist

  Acknowledgements

  Other Books by Louise Bay

  What the Lightning Sees

  The Empire State Series

  Hopeful

  Faithful

  Let’s Connect

  Ashleigh

  I stood on the street in front of Haven’s building, Luke’s arms wrapped around me. It was a cold day, but I couldn’t have felt warmer. It had been just eight hours since Luke had shown up on my doorstep, determined to show me that he was over Emma and that he wanted me. We’d spent most of our time since naked. We hadn’t discussed anything, hadn’t made anything official. Our minds had been taken over by our bodies. It had been beautiful—blissful, even. I didn’t have words for what Luke and I were yet, and until I really knew where we stood, I didn’t want to expose our new status to any sort of scrutiny.

  “You don’t think Haven will guess? She knows us both pretty well,” Luke said. “We could just be open with her. I don’t want to hide anything.”

  He was right. My best friend knew her brother and me extremely well. One lingering glance and she’d know right away something was up. But despite everything, I wanted to take things slowly. I’d suggested we date. It had taken us this long to start what was between us, so why rush? I wanted to make sure what we had wasn’t just physical. I was confident it wasn’t for me, but after so many years of my love for Luke being unrequited, I needed time to understand how he felt. Which meant I wasn’t ready to tell anyone else.

  “Then you’re going to have to put your game face on,” I said. “I don’t want her to guess. It’s not that I want to hide anything, but this is so new. We’ve been . . . dating for less than eight hours. Let’s just sit with this for a while.”

  The first time Luke and I’d kissed, Haven had gone postal, and it had tipped me into a spin. I wanted to make sure I was stronger, more certain of Luke’s and my relationship, in case she took things badly again.

  “Okay, whatever you need but I’m going to find it hard not to touch you for the next few hours.” Luke squeezed me tighter.

  “You can do it. I have faith in you.” I leaned forward and placed a kiss on his chest. “I need you to take a walk around the block.”

  “You do?”

  “I don’t think we should arrive at the same time.”

  Luke’s face dropped, but he nodded. He hugged me closer. “Let’s not stay long though, okay?”

  I frowned. As far as I was concerned, dating and taking things slow meant that we didn’t spend every moment with each other.

  “Oh,” he said. “You don’t want to spend the night together.” He removed his hands from my waist and shoved them in his pockets.

  “It’s not that I don’t want to, it’s just I thought we agreed we should take things slowly—date, not rush in to anything.” Had he misunderstood what I’d suggested?

  “Okay, well you’re going to have to explain the rules of dating to me so I’m clear.”

  I tried to keep my wince from showing on my face. “Are you mad?”

  “No, not mad. I don’t . . . I want to make you happy, but I don’t want to waste time, either. I want to speed up, not slow down—make up for all those lost years when we could have been together.” He reached and tucked my hair behind my ear. “But if slow is what you need, then that’s how we’ll go.” He smiled softly, but it didn’t hide the tinge of disappointment in his voice.

  “Thank you.”

  “Can I at least think about you naked?” he asked.

  I grinned. “I would be disappointed if you didn’t.”

  He took a step back, about to make his journey around the block. I reached across and stroked his hard chest.

  “See you in a minute.” I watched as he headed toward the main road.

  I was sitting on one of the bar stools, watching Haven in the kitchen. I’d thought it was Jake’s turn to cook, but I wasn’t going to remind her. We would definitely have a better meal if Haven did the cooking.

  “I got tickets to The Elephant Man. Jake can’t go. Want to come?” she asked as she set wineglasses onto the counter in front of me.

  “I’ve seen it. I told you.” I was pretty sure I’d skipped over telling her.

  “You did not. When did you see it?”

  I shrugged “A couple of weeks ago.”

  She stopped what she was doing and looked at me.

  “With Richard.” I checked my phone. Luke had been gone twenty minutes. What was keeping him? I could use a distraction right at that moment. I was about to get the third degree from Haven.

  “You’re dating again?”

  “No, he just had a spare ticket.”

  She raised her brows and went back to fiddling with the blender. The buzzer went, and Jake raced out of his study. “Is that you?” he bellowed into the intercom.

  “What, I’m not good enough for you to come out of your hidey hole for?” I asked.

  “You know Haven always sends me away while you talk about penises.”

  “We weren’t talking about penises,” I replied.

  “You’re right. We weren’t talking about penises, but we should have been. What’s Richard’s like?” Haven tilted her head.

  The familiar sound of Luke banging about came from behind me, and I had to stop the grin that was trying to break free. Despite seeing him less than half an hour ago, anticipation fluttered in my stomach. “Hey girls,” he said. “What’s going on?” He strode across to Haven and planted a kiss on her cheek, stealing one of the pastries she was fiddling with as she smacked his hand.

  “We’re talking about the fact that Ash is secretly dating Richard.”

  If I didn’t know Luke so well, I wouldn’t have noticed the almost imperceptible stiffness that ran through him at her words. “We are?” he asked, as he slid his eyes to mine and raised his brows.

  I shook my head. “We are not. Haven, stop being a witch.” Jesus, I really didn’t want Luke getting the wrong idea and thinking that I’d been less than honest with him when he’d asked me if there’d been anyone else. There was enough uncertainty between us; I didn’t need to add to it.

  “I’m not being witch-like in any way. You just said how you went on a date with Richard.”

  “I did not.” My eyes flitted between Luke and Haven. “I said he had a spare ticket to the theater and that I went with him. As friends. That’s it.” I wanted to smooth my hands over Luke’s jaw, to reassure him that for me Richard could never compare to him. Luke turned to the refrigerator.

  “Could friends develop into something more?” Haven asked.

  Luke was putting a little too much thought into his choice of beer. I wished he’d come and sit beside me.

  “I think he sounds like a good catch. A doctor and stuff. And he’s so sweet to you. He treats you really well.” Haven glanced across at Luke.

  “How can you
say that? You of all people?” I replied to Haven. “You didn’t settle. You waited for . . .” I circled my hand in Jake’s direction. “You know. ‘The one.’ I don’t want to go out with someone because on paper they’re a good catch. No, he’s firmly in the friend zone.”

  “I’ve heard that before,” Jake said.

  “Jake, don’t encourage her,” I replied, glancing across at Luke, who was still checking out beer labels. My heart was starting to thump. Was he avoiding me?

  “I’m not encouraging her. You’re the one who just confessed to going on a date with this Richard guy.”

  “It wasn’t a date.” I shook my head.

  “Sounds like a date to me,” Luke said as he spun to face me, grinning. I let out a breath as I realized he wasn’t mad.

  “Whatever. Pour me some wine.” I pushed my glass across the counter at him.

  He smiled as he took my drink, scraping his fingers along mine as he did. I shivered. Why had we come? Why had I suggested that we spend the night apart? Even if he wasn’t with me tonight, he would be all I thought about.

  Haven shrugged. “I’m just saying, give the guy a break. I want you to be happy, Ash. He must like you if you’re still friends after you broke up with him. He might be the one without you even realizing it.”

  “I think I’ll know when I find the one,” I mumbled into my glass. How I felt about Luke put any possibility of me ever dating Richard into a box marked never going to happen. He was a nice guy, but he didn’t set my skin on fire with a single touch. His smile couldn’t heat my cheeks. He just wasn’t the one.

  “What was that?” Luke asked me.

  “What?” I said, pretending not to follow him.

  “You said something about the one?” Luke grinned at me, obviously enjoying every moment of my torture.

  “What about you, Luke?” Jake interrupted, saving me from further embarrassment. “Have you manned up and asked Fiona out?”

  I sucked in a breath. What would he reveal? “Should I take this to the table?” I asked Haven, gesturing at the salad, and trying to cover up the fact that I wanted to hear every last sound that came out of Luke’s mouth about Fiona. Haven glanced at me, a sympathetic look on her face, and nodded. She must have thought I didn’t want to hear about Luke dating Fiona. I wandered over to the other side of the living space with the bowl.

  “Yeah, we went out a couple of times.”

  “What?” Haven asked. “You’ve been dating and you’ve not told me? Do you like her? Are we going to meet her?”

  “Yes I like her. She’s a nice girl.”

  Even though I was pretty sure Luke didn’t have feelings for Fiona, my stomach twisted. I hated that he’d dated her. It wasn’t that he’d done anything wrong—he’d been doing what I’d wanted him to do—but it would have been better if she’d turned out to be a complete crazy person. After all, they still worked in the same office. He saw her regularly. It took every ounce of willpower not to blurt out that Luke and I were together. I wanted to claim him. To stop Haven from talking about other women who would be good for him. I was good for him.

  Despite my curiosity, I excused myself to go to the bathroom. I needed to take a beat, get my shit together. Staring into the mirror, I pressed my fingers along my eyebrows, straightening out my frown. I was used to being envious of Emma, but I’d always taken some comfort from the fact that she didn’t see the side of Luke that I did. She didn’t have the same shared history, couldn’t make him laugh the way I could. I didn’t know anything about Fiona. She had the triathlon thing in common with Luke, which he seemed to love. And she saw him at work, which I never did. Could she make him laugh? Had I become another Emma to Fiona?

  As I wandered back to the living room, everyone had taken their seats around the dining table. I sank into the free seat between Luke and Jake. I tried to convince myself there was an invisible barrier between Luke and me. Touching was an impossibly bad idea if we didn’t want Haven and Jake to catch on.

  The problem was, my barrier was faulty and acted more like a magnet. Being so close to him made me want to be closer still. I wanted him to hold me. I crossed my arms in front of me, so I didn’t lose control and accidently reach for his floppy hair or smooth my hands across his broad back.

  I startled when his leg brushed against mine as he reached for the jug of water—was he trying to torture me? I wanted to climb into his lap and feel his arms around me. His hand came to my thigh, and I melted.

  He looked at me, and I widened my eyes at him in warning. What was he doing? I was worried Haven would see his hand. He squeezed my leg and removed his hand, leaving my skin buzzing. I glanced across at Haven. Had she seen that?

  “So when do you hear about business school, Ash?” Jake asked.

  I hesitated as I tried to concentrate on something other than Luke. “Soon, I think.” I’d forgotten that I should have a decision this week.

  “How are you going to manage to study and work at the same time?” Haven asked. “Sounds impossible.”

  “Yeah, I think it will be tough. Richard suggested I go part-time, but there’s no way. I mean, no.”

  “How did he suggest you pay your rent?” Haven asked. “Honestly, men have no common sense.”

  Jake rolled his eyes, and Luke shook his head at Haven’s dismissal of the male species. They both handled her perfectly.

  “Oh, he had a solution for that. He said I should move in with him.”

  Luke had his wineglass to his lips and spluttered into his drink at my revelation. “He said what?” His voice was tight.

  I focused on Haven, afraid to meet Luke’s eyes. I probably shouldn’t have shared that without having mentioned it to Luke first.

  “What, he was offering you his spare room?” she asked.

  “In return for your vagina?” Jake added.

  “It’s never okay for you to say vagina,” I said, grinning at Jake while Haven playfully smacked him on the arm. Luke didn’t join in, but his clenched fists told me he wasn’t happy. I desperately wanted to reach across my invisible barrier and drop a small kiss on his shoulder. He had nothing to worry about.

  Luke

  I believed Ashleigh when she said nothing had happened with Richard, but that didn’t stop me from feeling homicidal. Ashleigh was mine, and everyone needed to know it. I’d been a second away from announcing it to Haven and Jake. The only thing that stopped me was the thought that Ashleigh and I might take two steps back. I didn’t have time to do anything but move forward with her. I wanted to start our future together. I just wished she were as eager as I was.

  I tried to think of reasons that would persuade her to stay with me tonight. I didn’t want to be without her, especially not with conversations of Richard and Fiona on our minds. I didn’t want her focused on what might have been. I wanted her focused on us.

  “I’m going to head home. I didn’t get much sleep last night, and I don’t want to start the week tired,” Ashleigh said as she closed the dishwasher. She leaned forward to program the machine and gave me an excellent view down her top. Was she wearing a bra? I’d been trying to control my hard-on all night, but my dick was getting sick of holding back. I was close to dragging Ashleigh home to get naked.

  “You’ll stay for another beer though, right?” Jake asked me.

  I wanted to say no, but I glanced at Ashleigh and she gave me a small nod. “Sure,” I said. Better to be here with Jake and Haven than at home, on my own, wishing I was with Ashleigh.

  I relaxed when Ashleigh left. I’d been on edge all evening, trying to make sure I wasn’t giving away how I felt about her. More than once I’d been about to touch her and had to stop myself. It felt so unnatural to be acting as we had for the last two decades.

  Things were different now.

  “So, you didn’t say anything more about Fiona; what’s going on there?” Jake asked as we collapsed on the sofas with our beers. Haven followed, bringing her wine.

  “There’s nothing to say. She’s a
nice girl, but she’s not for me.”

  “She’s not? Does that mean you know who is?” Haven asked.

  “Haven, you know that the ball is in Ashleigh’s court.”

  Haven sighed. “I wish you two would just sort it out. Richard clearly isn’t any competition. Do what you have to do, Luke. Make her feel special. If she’s the one for you, she needs to know that. Take action.”

  It was good advice. Advice I’d already followed. I just needed Ashleigh to understand we had nothing to hide, that she had nothing to be afraid of. She could trust me.

  My phone buzzed.

  Ashleigh: Hey.

  Me: Hey yourself.

  Ashleigh: Did you have a good night?

  Me: It would have been better if I’d been able to touch you openly.

  Ashleigh: I appreciate your patience.

  Me: I’m not sure how long it will last. You’re too beautiful to resist and you’re mine now. You know you are.

  Ashleigh: I am.

  Me: Glad you agree.

  Ashleigh. I miss you.

  Me: Already?

  Ashleigh: Already. How about dating starts tomorrow night. Come round when you leave?

  I grinned. There was nowhere I’d rather be than with Ashleigh, and she couldn’t resist what there was between us anymore than I could. Who was she trying to kid?

  Luke

  I’d left Haven and Jake’s as soon as I’d finished my beer. Maybe it was obvious why I left so soon after Ashleigh, but it was hard to give a shit.

  I pressed my forehead to Ashleigh’s door, willing myself inside. My heartbeat quickened as I heard her unlock the door.

  I’d stopped at a late-night supermarket and picked up chocolate and a small bouquet of flowers. As she opened the door, I held them out to her.

  “What’s this?” she asked.

  “Well, flowers and chocolates are what you bring for dates, aren’t they?”

  “You are ridiculous.” She grinned. “Thank you.”

  “As long as you’re into ridiculous, that’s fine by me.”

  She put her arms around my neck and held my gaze. “I’m very into ridiculous.”