Coco du Ciel

by Elise Noble

  And what was that tickling Rhys’s nose? Had the ants come back? He moved to swat the irritation away, but his hand wouldn’t move. Why not? He forced an eyelid open, only to realise he had bigger problems than he’d thought.

  Shit. So much for being a gentleman.

  His body was curled around Coco’s, her back to his front, and it seemed he’d been sniffing her hair in his damn sleep. Worse, the reason he couldn’t move his hand was that after he’d curved it around her breast, she’d wrapped her own hand over the top of it, holding it in place.

  This was… Well, awkward didn’t even begin to cover it. He tried a gentle tug to extricate himself, but Coco only held on tighter and squirmed against him. Great. Now his dick was about to explode.

  “Sweetheart…”

  “Mmm?”

  “You need to let go.”

  “But why?”

  Because otherwise, Rhys would be tempted to do something they’d both regret later. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t consider it, but then what? They didn’t even know if she was single. A girl like Coco—sweet and smart, witty and pretty—would kick a guy like him to the kerb on any other day.

  “I need to use the bathroom.”

  For a shower. A freezing-cold shower. Then he needed to find coffee, painkillers, and the common sense he’d mislaid last night. What had he been thinking? Oh, that’s right—he hadn’t. Alcohol had a lot to answer for, although he knew deep down that the wine didn’t make him do anything he hadn’t wanted to do already. This whole “roommate” thing was harder than he’d ever dreamed.

  When he got back upstairs, Coco was sleeping peacefully, her hair spread out over his pillow. She looked so innocent. Did she realise she’d turned his entire world upside down?

  As if she could sense his presence, her eyelids flickered open.

  “She wakes. How’s your head?”

  She blinked a couple of times. “Ouch.”

  Rhys held out the packet of paracetamol he’d found downstairs. “Try these.”

  “Paracetamol?”

  “Aceto…whatever you call it.”

  “Thanks.” Coco shuffled up to a seated position, back against the wall. “Is that coffee?”

  “Black. Someone finished the milk again, and most of our coffee granules too.”

  Our coffee. Rhys caught his slip of the tongue the moment the words left his mouth. Since when had there been an “us”? A “we”? His growing feelings for Coco scared him because how could this have a happy ending? There were too many unknowns.

  If Coco noticed his overreach, she didn’t let on. “Do we have any plans today? Apart from buying groceries?”

  “We need to go to the outdoor store again. Buying the cheap air mattress was a false economy. I should have bought the deluxe one to start with, and a battery-operated pump as well.”

  “You’re buying a new mattress? But I thought…”

  “Thought what?”

  “We shared the bed last night—I thought we’d carry on that way.”

  “That’s not a good idea.”

  “Why?”

  When Coco nibbled on her bottom lip, Rhys almost forgot the reason entirely. His dick began to twitch again. Dammit, he’d just taken care of that.

  “It’s just not, okay?”

  “But you wanted me this morning.” Coco shrugged one shoulder and glanced at his crotch. “It was pretty obvious.”

  At that moment, Rhys wanted to vanish as suddenly as Coco had arrived. He’d been hoping to hide the evidence of his dirty dreams.

  “It doesn’t matter what I want.”

  “What if I want the same thing?”

  “Coco…” That wasn’t even her name. “Babe…” No, that was worse. “Look, you can’t possibly know what you want. Neither of us knows the first thing about you. You could have a boyfriend, or a fiancé. You could even be married.”

  “I wasn’t wearing a ring.”

  “You weren’t wearing anything.”

  “Thanks for reminding me.”

  She bit her lip, eyes filling with tears, and Rhys cursed under his breath. He’d hurt Coco with his words, and he wished he could take them back, but now she wouldn’t face him.

  “You’re right, okay?”

  “Right about what?” she mumbled.

  “I do want you.” Rhys stated the obvious. “And when we solve this puzzle, if it turns out you’re available, then I’d like nothing more than to take you out on a proper date. But for now, I can’t touch you. I don’t want either of us to end up getting hurt.”

  Rhys walked to the window and stared out. Next door’s cat was sitting on the fence, washing its paws. The bin was overflowing because Hashim had forgotten it was his turn to put the rubbish out, and two traffic cones had appeared from somewhere to give the yard a splash of colour. Just another day in paradise.

  Coco let out a long sigh. “I guess I can understand that. I don’t like it, but I understand it.”

  “We have to make the best of this.”

  Rhys tried to stay optimistic, but if he’d known what was to come, he’d have opened that window and jumped right out of it.

  CHAPTER 11

  THE KEENING WAIL cut to Rhys’s core, and he knifed up in bed, his heart racing.

  His first thought? A fox had caught next door’s cat. His second thought? Coco.

  As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he saw her thrashing on the bed, the sheets tangled around her feet. A sliver of moonlight caught the sheen of perspiration on her forehead. A nightmare. She was only having a nightmare, but it sounded as if she were dying.

  “No! No, no, no…” The last word dissolved into sobs, and she arched off the bed, her limbs stiff. Bloody hell, this was like a scene from a horror movie. Should he wake her? Call an ambulance?

  “Help me,” she gasped.

  How?

  Her body gave one last heave, and then she lay still, head and shoulders hanging off the side of the bed. Was she…alive?

  Rhys crawled to her side and grabbed her wrist, his own breath coming in pants as he felt for a pulse. Faint, but there it was, powerful in contrast to her limp body. Thank goodness. Her hand felt cold and clammy, and when he touched her cheek, it was slick with sweat. And…something else. Tears. She’d been crying in her sleep.

  “Coco,” he whispered, then raised his voice and tried again. “Coco?”

  Nothing. Rhys switched on the bedside lamp, bathing the room in a yellow glow, and risked shaking her shoulder.

  “Wake up!”

  Her eyes popped open. Their focus wavered at first, but when her gaze finally fixed on Rhys’s, his skin prickled. Why? Because he’d never seen fear like that before. A second later, Coco threw herself into his arms, holding him in a death grip.

  “It’ll be okay,” he soothed, empty words for empty promises. “Everything’ll be okay.”

  Rhys’s T-shirt grew damp as more tears fell, and she gulped in air as if tasting it for the first time. Desperate, hungry breaths. Boy, that must have been some nightmare.

  “What happened?” he whispered. “Can you remember?”

  “I…I was in the water. Under the water, and I couldn’t get out. Something was keeping me down, and I couldn’t…I couldn’t breathe.”

  She’d dreamed she was drowning. How cruel a person’s mind could be. First the amnesia, and now this.

  “You’re okay now. You’re safe.”

  “But it was so vivid. So real.”

  “The only water in this place is in the bath, and if you want, I can come with— Ah, shit, now I sound like a right perv.”

  Coco choked out a laugh. “I think I was in the ocean. Or maybe a lake.”

  “Then you’re safe here.” Although she was in danger of catching a chill. Her pyjamas clung to her back, soaked through with sweat, and the heating was turned off. Gary again. “But you should change into dry clothes.”

  “This is my only pair of pyjamas.”

  Rhys had put off buying Coco more clot
hes on the assumption that she’d soon be going home, but since it seemed she’d be sticking around for a while…

  “You can borrow one of my T-shirts tonight, okay? We’ll go shopping again tomorrow.”

  Rhys rummaged through his closet until he found a new shirt, a promo item from a software company still in the cellophane wrapper. He’d never worn it because it was size XXL and he didn’t want to hear Hashim’s jokes about needing to go to the gym, but it would make a reasonable substitute for a nightie.

  Coco’s dreams had sapped her energy, so Rhys pulled her to her feet and held her steady while she swayed for a second.

  “You all right?”

  She nodded, but she didn’t seem convinced. Neither was Rhys, but what could he do about it?

  “I’ll make us both hot chocolate while you change. Want to watch a movie when I get back?”

  Another nod, this time more certain. “I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep again tonight.”

  That made two of them. As Rhys waited for the kettle to boil and for his heart rate to return to normal, he replayed the earlier scene over and over in his mind—Coco’s wails, her tears, her sheer terror. Watching a woman he cared about scared out of her mind had left him feeling drained as well. And he did care about her. Far too much.

  Tomorrow, he’d buy her all the pyjamas in the world because he didn’t want her to go home.

  ***

  “Want me to do the shopping while you work?” Coco offered, sounding more cheerful than she looked. “I might as well make myself useful.”

  On any other day, Rhys would have joined her, both for the pleasure of her company and to get away from his screen. But he’d just received a message from a make-up vlogger about a possible collaboration—he’d write an app, she’d provide the content—and the girl wanted a call this morning. A deal like that could net him thousands, and it was too good an opportunity to pass up.

  “You know the way into town?”

  “Yup. I’m good with directions. It’s just everything else I can’t remember.”

  Rhys raided the emergency stash of cash he kept hidden in his underwear drawer and gave Coco enough money for groceries and more pyjamas. He considered giving her his debit card so she could use the ATM as well, but they weren’t quite at that point in their relationship yet.

  Relationship.

  Did they have a relationship? True, he’d knocked her back when she came on to him, but his chivalry had been reluctant. And there was no denying how close they were becoming. It was difficult not to develop feelings when they were living in each other’s pockets.

  Coco wasn’t like any of the girls he’d gone to uni with. They’d been more interested in his ability to help them with their coursework than him as a person, and after being used one too many times, he’d begun to perfect his avoidance tactics. Stacey alone had managed to get through his defences, and look how that had turned out.

  But Coco… Coco was different.

  “Buy whatever you want. If this isn’t enough cash, we can make another trip tomorrow.”

  She leaned in to kiss him on the cheek. “You’re too generous, Rhys Evans.”

  Damn, he was in trouble.

  Thankfully, the phone rang as Coco slipped out the door, and he was grateful for the distraction. At least, he was until he saw the name on the screen. This was the third call from Uncle Albert in as many days, and Rhys took the coward’s way out and let it go to voicemail. He knew exactly what his uncle wanted—answers about his tree pod—and Rhys didn’t have any.

  That seemed to be a recurring theme in his life at the moment.

  CHAPTER 12

  “WE CAN’T GO on like this.”

  Rhys covered his mouth out of politeness as he yawned, but there was no hiding his exhaustion.

  Two weeks after Coco’s first nightmare, they’d both become zombies, and he looked back with fondness at the nights when Gary and Stacey had thrown their alcohol-fuelled parties because even those had been easier to sleep through than Coco’s nocturnal shenanigans. They’d hoped the first nightmare was a one-off, but it turned out to be just the start. Every time she drifted off, the hellish dream came back, and she drowned over and over and over again. Meanwhile, Rhys was living in his own nightmare as he tried to comfort her, usually with limited success.

  He managed a few hours of work each day, splitting his time between the fitness app and the make-up project. The latter wasn’t difficult, per se, but keeping up with the whims of an Instagram “star” who changed her mind more often than he changed his underwear took every bit of patience he possessed.

  Coco scrubbed her hands through her hair. “I know we can’t go on like this. It isn’t fair on you. I think… I think I should look for somewhere else to live.”

  How could she with no job, no money, and no identity? And that was only the logistics. Rhys didn’t want her to leave; he just wanted her to sleep through the night without dying. They’d visited the pharmacy and tried five different over-the-counter remedies—everything from Nytol to valerian extract—but none of them made the slightest difference to Coco. Rhys had started taking them himself before his afternoon naps.

  “That wasn’t what I meant at all.”

  “What alternative do we have? The meditation app didn’t help one bit, and Gary’s still angry at me.”

  She’d woken the whole household with her screaming the night before last, and when Hashim made a crack about Rhys’s horrifying performance in bed, only Coco’s hand on Rhys’s arm had stopped him from swinging a punch. The lack of sleep had left him with a short fuse.

  “Let’s see if there’s somebody who can help. A doctor. Or a therapist?”

  “They’ll probably think I’m crazy.”

  “You can’t be the only person with nightmares. Maybe sleeping pills would work?”

  “I’ll try anything.” Coco’s voice dropped to a whisper. “Sometimes, I wish I could fall asleep and never wake up.”

  “Don’t talk like that. Don’t. We’ll fix this, I promise. We’ll fix it.”

  Although Rhys had no idea how.

  ***

  A trip to the doctor presented its own challenges. Luckily, the local GP’s practice was taking new patients, but Coco still needed an identity.

  “Coco? Just Coco? Are you a singer or something?” the receptionist asked, tapping away at her keyboard. “Nope, it says I need a surname. Even Madonna has a surname.”

  “I don’t know it. I have amnesia.”

  “Amnesia? Sure you do, hun. Still gonna need a surname.”

  “We have a police report.”

  “My cousin made a police report saying he’d got abducted by aliens, but that don’t make it true.”

  “Just put the surname down as du Ciel,” Rhys told the receptionist. That was easier than trying to argue with a computer.

  “You’re gonna have to spell that.”

  “D-U space C-I-E-L.”

  “Du Ciel… Okay. And what’s your nationality?”

  Which part of “amnesia” did the woman not understand?

  “She doesn’t know.”

  “Well, I’ll just note her down as ‘refugee.’ She’ll be able to access GP and emergency care, but she’s not eligible for hospital inpatient services.”

  The receptionist’s words were another reminder of the need to find out Coco’s history, otherwise she’d spend her whole life being treated like a second-class citizen. Rhys hadn’t put quite as much effort into the search as he should have over the past fortnight, mostly because he’d been exhausted but also because he’d come to the realisation that he wanted her to stay. Despite trying to keep some distance between them, he’d developed feelings that wouldn’t go away even if she did. The selfish part of him didn’t want to get hurt.

  “A refugee?” Coco murmured. “Is that what I am?”

  “No, sweetheart, and we’ll prove it, but not today. Let’s focus on getting you healthy again, and then we can sort out the rest.”


  They left the surgery with a prescription for Zopiclone and high hopes. Twelve hours later, those hopes hadn’t just been dashed; they’d been pulverised, stomped on, and flushed down the toilet.

  Coco began thrashing around on the bed, and unlike the other times, Rhys couldn’t wake her. A minute passed, two, and he tried shaking her, squeezing her hands, even slapping her when she seemed as if she were choking, but her eyes stayed closed as her subconscious tore her soul apart. When he tried to hold her still, she punched him, but the physical pain was nothing compared to the agony in his heart.

  Finally, finally, she stopped flailing and lay limp on the mattress, her face white and cool to the touch.

  Fuck, she wasn’t…was she? Rhys scrabbled for her wrists and checked for a pulse, holding his breath for those terrifying seconds until he felt the faint flutter. Still Coco didn’t wake up. Those damn pills…

  Screw chivalry—he climbed into bed with her and gathered her close, one hand pressed against her chest so he could feel her racing heart. As long as it kept beating, they could fix this. He’d promised.

  “Everything’s gonna be okay,” he whispered, but deep down, he knew he was lying. He was way, way out of his depth here. His degree was in computing, not psychology, and even if he magically knew what to say, how could they ever unlock the secrets of Coco’s mind? Her past was a black hole. Even an astronomer would struggle to find its hidden secrets.

  The sky had started to lighten when she finally stirred in his arms. She twisted around to face him, smiling at first, but that smile quickly faded when she saw his serious expression.

  “What happened? Something happened, didn’t it?”

  “You had another nightmare. A longer one this time, and I couldn’t wake you.”

  “Sorry, I’m so sorry. Did I disturb everyone again?”

  “Just me. Hashim bought a pair of earplugs, and Jorge and Gary both drank too much last night.”

  Rhys tried to keep his voice light. Telling Coco that her refusal to wake up had been the scariest moment of his life would only make her feel worse than she already did. And considering Rhys had once accepted a lift with a guy who turned out to be not only tipsy but also a speed demon, that was saying something. Being a passenger as a nutcase drove the wrong way along a dual carriageway was no joke. He’d seen his life flash before his eyes several times that night, but now it was Coco he feared for.