2nd Cycle of the Harbinger Series Collection

by Carolyn McCray

  “Good,” Nicole said, forcing a smile on her face. “It was really nice of you to stop by.”

  Any semblance of a grin fell off Glick’s face. “This isn’t a social visit, Nicole. Kent’s case is out of our precinct. The detectives in the 2-9 don’t want you breathing down their necks. I’m here to politely ask you to back off.”

  She did love her captain. He didn’t mince any words or pretend to be anything but her supervisor. For that, she appreciated him.

  “Heard you loud and clear, Captain,” Nicole replied.

  Glick’s eyebrow went up. “But the question is, are you going to comply?”

  Nicole, not being above a little stagecraft, nudged the baby, who grumbled about being separated from his favorite nipple. “Again, thanks for coming by, Captain.”

  Glick looked like he was going to say something, but in the end closed his mouth and exited.

  Nicole got the baby to reattach. She needed him nice and full, plump as a tick, for what she had planned next.

  CHAPTER 3

  Ruben walked down the dingy alley. It smelled like all alleys like this smelled. Dirty and depressing. This is where the refuse of society came to die. They curled up next to overflowing dumpsters for their last moments.

  Wow, he had been on the job long enough to become a little jaded. Or maybe it was just the strong stench of urine that made him wax darkly poetic.

  Then he found what he was looking for. Nicole.

  She was bent over a pool of blood. A pool of Kent’s blood.

  “I thought Glick ordered you to stay clear of the case?” Ruben asked, as he stepped under the crime scene tape.

  Nicole didn’t even look up. She shrugged, “How did you find me?”

  “I stopped by your house and your father said you’d gone out for a bit of fresh air. I pretty much knew what that was code for.”

  Nicole rose and gave him a sad smile. “So are you going to narc on me too?”

  “Wouldn’t dream of it,” Ruben said. He could understand her draw to this place. To where her husband had fallen in the line of duty. Ruben had many, many issues with the profiler, but he never doubted Kent’s dedication to his job. If anything, Ruben disliked how dedicated to his job the profiler had been. Yet somehow Kent had elbowed Ruben out of Nicole’s bed.

  “Don’t you have a newborn at home?”

  Nicole’s nose scrunched up. “Not you, too.”

  Ruben tilted up a shoulder. “Most women three days out from child birth are not out roaming crime scenes.”

  “The baby is well fed. He won’t be up for another few hours. I’ve got him timed down like clockwork.”

  “So, take the time to stroll in the park. Go to a museum.”

  “Have you ever actually met me?” Nicole asked. “I don’t do those things on an average day, let alone…”

  “I know,” Ruben acknowledged. “Everyone grieves in their own way. I shouldn’t fault you for yours.”

  “Why were you looking for me anyway?” Nicole asked, stepping over the blood pool and joining Ruben by the tape.

  He had almost wished that she hadn’t remembered he was looking for her. Now he had to fess up.

  “Well… You see…it so happens…”

  Nicole cocked her head. “Really? You told me my husband was dead easier than this.”

  She was right. That had been easier.

  “There was a slight mix up…well, not so slight…”

  “Ruben!” Nicole snapped. “I only have another two hours before I have to be home and I don’t want to spend it standing here listening to you sputter.”

  He took in a deep breath. He might as well spit it out. “The morgue delivered the wrong body to the funeral home.”

  “Okay, so have them send that guy back and get Kent out there. The funeral isn’t for a few days.”

  “It is a she at the funeral home,” Ruben corrected. “And they would love to get Kent’s body there, only…”

  “Again, Ruben, the baby needs to be fed,” Nicole reprimanded him.

  Oh, this was going to go so badly.

  “Only Kent was sent out to a crematorium,” Ruben stated, then waited for the fireworks. But there were none. “Kent has been cremated,” he clarified, since Nicole hadn’t responded.

  Then her eyebrows came together. “You are telling me that Kent has gone up in smoke. That literally he has been reduced to ash, the exact opposite of what Kent or I wanted?”

  Ruben nodded, bracing himself for the tirade he was sure to come.

  Nicole tilted her head back and laughed, then had to double over, she was laughing so hard. The exact opposite response he expected of her. As a matter of fact, he feared she had gone hysterical.

  “Nicole?” Ruben asked.

  She put up a hand, still laughing.

  It took a few moments until she finally was able to stand. Even then, she’d have fits of laughter. Between them she managed to utter, “Come on, Ruben, it is funny.”

  Ruben did not see the humor in it, but he was not about to argue with Nicole in this state. Besides his ears had been spared a burning, so he was kind of grateful this response came out of nowhere.

  “This is Kent,” Nicole stated, wiping her eyes. “Of course, his funeral is going sideways. Duh.”

  Ruben cracked a smile. Perhaps his partner was right. Kent would have been appalled if things had gone smoothly.

  “This is for the best,” Nicole said, sounding resolved. “I wasn’t sure how I was going to get through an open casket ceremony anyway.”

  “You sure you are okay?” Ruben asked.

  Nicole sniffled once then nodded. “The best I’ve been all week.”

  She ducked under the tape.

  What else could Ruben do but follow?

  * * *

  Nicole walked into her house. It was as quiet as a mouse.

  Peter tiptoed out of the kitchen.

  “He’s still asleep?” Nicole asked.

  “Dad just checked on him. Sleeping like the proverbial baby.”

  Nicole smiled. She could get some investigation done and still be a good mom.

  “A Captain Glick called. He said that he needs to see you as soon as possible.”

  Nicole’s stomach dropped. Had Ruben narced on her?

  She glanced to her watch. She still had an hour and a half before the baby should wake.

  “Tell Dad I went into the station. If the baby wakes, I pumped some milk earlier this morning.”

  “Yuck, but okay,” Peter said, giving her a peck on the cheek. “We’ve got this.”

  And that her father and brother did. But at some point, they would go home. What was she going to do alone in this big house?

  That concern was for another day. Right now, she had to figure out what Glick wanted.

  Nicole turned and headed back out the door to her Mustang. For the first time since getting pregnant, she realized she might have to give up her beloved car for something more practical.

  A mini-van or some such nonsense.

  A shudder passed down her spine. She was willing to give up a lot for motherhood but give up her Mustang? Um. No way. No how.

  The drive into the precinct was uneventful. Like the universe didn’t even notice her loss. Other people drove to work, to school, getting on with their lives. And she didn’t even have her husband’s body any longer. She just had their baby.

  It hadn’t even been two hours, and she yearned for her child. Was it an emotional response or just her boobs getting filled with milk again?

  No, she wanted to smell her boy’s hair. She wanted to cuddle against his soft cheeks.

  Nicole had always thought that “maternal bond” thing was a sham. But now that she had her own child, she could tell you with no uncertainty that it was very real.

  Pulling into her parking spot, Nicole got out and headed to the door but something stopped her. She’d taken this route a thousand times, yet it seemed like the first time.

  Her life would never be the sam
e, she realized. That she had to adjust to the “new” normal.

  She felt weary walking into the bullpen.

  There were the prerequisite nods of condolence, then once she passed, Nicole could hear the whispers behind her back.

  Screw them.

  Nicole headed straight for the Captain’s door, knocking once before entering.

  Glick had that look. A mixture of sympathy and worry.

  “What is it? I already know Kent got cremated.”

  Her captain shook his head. “No. No, this is bigger than that.”

  Well, that she would like to hear. She followed Glick’s lead as he sat down.

  “They found the dealer that killed the other gangbanger with a knife.”

  Nicole perked up for the first time in several days. “Great. Let’s go talk to him.”

  “Not so fast,” Glick said, holding up his hand. “He was found dead last night.”

  Nicole’s head slumped forward as a sigh of the ages escaped her lips. Of course the guy was dead. “Do we have any proof he killed Kent?”

  “They found him last night, but he’s probably been dead since shortly after he knifed the other guy. He was dead of an overdose long before Kent was attacked,” her Captain explained.

  There went their only lead into her husband’s murder. It burst into flame then disappeared. At the least, it wasn’t some junkie that killed him.

  A chill went down her spine. The only other logical explanation was the killer from the case Kent was working on. The one where he thought a cop was killing prostitutes.

  Maybe he was meeting with a cop he thought he could trust, then the killer stabbed him in the back. That scenario made a whole lot more sense then a junkie getting the drop on Kent.

  But that meant the person who stabbed Kent had to be a well-known associate. Kent didn’t trust a lot of people, so that left the suspect pool very, very small.

  As a matter of fact, Nicole could only think of six or seven people Kent would feel comfortable turning his back on.

  Two of them were sitting in this room.

  Nicole nodded to Glick. “Thank you, Captain.”

  She went to rise, but Glick stopped her. “That’s it? Where’s the twenty questions? The vow to solve Kent’s case if it’s the last thing you do?”

  Nicole shrugged. “I guess motherhood’s changed me.”

  Her captain’s eyes squinted as he tilted his head, surveying her. “Not that much. What’s going on?”

  “Nothing,” Nicole said, lying. “I just need to get home to the baby.”

  The sentence had the desired effect. “Of course, of course,” Glick said, his chair scraping on the tile floor as he rose to rush ahead of her to open the door.

  Nicole stepped out into the bullpen. It must have happened more quickly than anyone in the room expected, as they all stared straight at her. Then there was an outbreak of coughing, shuffling papers, and sudden interest in their shoes.

  She’d let the Captain fill the rest of the detectives in on the latest news. She really did need to get home to the baby. Which, she probably should name one of these days.

  Nearly halfway to the door, a man in a jumpsuit came up to her. He looked like a deliveryman for a courier service.

  “Detective Nicole Usher-Harbinger?”

  “Yes?”

  She expected it to be a summons of some sort. She got them all the time.

  “Here you go,” the man said, holding out a plain white envelope with her name scrawled across the front.

  It was Kent’s handwriting.

  The room spun. Nicole clutched the edge of the desk to keep herself upright.

  “Ma’am, are you okay?” the young man asked.

  “Yes, yes,” she mumbled, taking the proffered envelope.

  She waited until the young man left the bullpen before she sat down and with shaky hands, opened the envelope.

  Inside was a single piece of paper, with no header.

  The letter was written in Kent’s handwriting.

  “I am so sorry, babe,” the letter began. “If you are reading this, then I screwed up and got myself killed. And we can probably assume it wasn’t in a car accident or a piano falling on my head, although, as you know, that is how I have always wanted to go out.”

  Laughter interrupted the tears. Yep, Kent had always wanted to be killed in a cartoon fashion. That was her husband.

  It took a few moments to let the tears clear for her to be able to read on further.

  “I’ve been updating this letter nearly daily as we approach the birth of our son. I can’t tell you how sorry I am that I failed you. I shouldn’t have been doing whatever stupid thing I was doing. For that, I will be eternally sorry.”

  Nicole wiped the tears from the edge of her eyelids. She didn’t want any more to fall on the paper and smudge the writing. This was the last of her husband that she had.

  “Seeing that I am an idiot, please go ahead and name the baby whatever you like. Even your father’s name is fine. I just want you to be happy. And to that end, if you need to, accept Ruben’s affections. We both know that he will be loyal to you and be a fantastic father to our boy.”

  That Nicole was surprised by. Kent ever talking kindly of Ruben?

  Then, there it was. “Besides we both know I loved you more, better and longer, so we’re good.”

  God, how she wished Kent was there to dig her elbow into. She missed what a pain in the butt he could be.

  “Try not to mourn too long, my love. And know that I loved you more than I ever told you. Forever, Kent.”

  The sobs came in waves. She didn’t care who saw. It was like the wound was ripped open, fresh and bleeding again. It was sweet that Kent had done this, but also in many ways cruel. How could she heal if she missed him like oxygen?

  “Nicole?” Ruben asked from behind her.

  She snatched the letter and crumpled it back into the envelope. Ruben had a fiancée. Nicole didn’t want to interfere with their relationship.

  “It’s okay. Kent just sent a letter from beyond the grave.”

  Ruben nodded sympathetically as he always did. Could she ever feel for him even a fraction of what she felt for Kent? Even with Kent’s permission? She doubted it.

  Ruben put a hand on her back. “Do you want me to drive you home?”

  Sucking up the last sniffle, Nicole rose, stepping away from his touch. “I’ve got the Mustang.”

  “Of course, you do,” Ruben replied in that patented sympathetic tone of his. “But your father and I can come back for it.”

  Nobody got why she loved Kent so much. The man would never think to insult her in such a way. That she couldn’t drive herself home? That she needed all the “men” in her life to coddle her?

  Kent might have been a total dick at times, but he never thought of her as anything but capable.

  “I said, I’ve got it.”

  And with that she turned and strode out of the precinct.

  CHAPTER 4

  Ruben wasn’t proud of himself as he followed Nicole home. She would be furious if she found out, so he had to make certain that she didn’t.

  As she said she would, Nicole went home. The baby certainly needed to be fed. But she had that look in her eye. Something that told him she wasn’t going to stay home.

  He’d set up halfway down the block on the opposite side of her house, and waited and waited. But not for that long. Not fifty minutes after arriving home, Nicole was back at her front door. She and her father were arguing about something. More than likely why Nicole was leaving so soon.

  Nicole, as always, won. Red-faced, her father turned back into the house and shut the door. Nicole trotted down the front steps and then revved her Mustang.

  He had to wait until she turned down the next street before he pulled out. Besides, the direction she was headed was pretty obvious.

  She was going to the morgue.

  Maybe it was just to rag out the staff on misplacing her husband’s body. But to his m
ind, her errand was something more serious.

  For over a week, even before Kent’s death, Nicole had become secretive. Holding back. She would start to tell him something, then stop mid-sentence and tack away.

  Had it been something to do with the circumstances of Kent’s death?

  Was she investigating the case despite orders to the contrary?

  Knowing Nicole, that would be the case. Way too much of Kent had rubbed off on her.

  Ruben knew that Nicole hated the morgue. She would go to extraordinary lengths to avoid the place, which was a little hard to do given she was a homicide detective. His partner really didn’t understand why a phone call wouldn’t do. She felt absolutely no compulsion to have the ME’s little show and tell.

  But here she was, driving to the place she loathed.

  Ruben stayed far back, approaching the morgue from the other side of the building. Sure enough, Nicole headed toward the autopsy room, rather then the business offices.

  If his partner was going to complain about Kent’s body being released to a crematorium, Nicole would’ve made a beeline for the administrative offices. No, Nicole was on a different errand.

  A secret errand.

  * * *

  Nicole was glad to hear her heels click against the dull grey tile floor. Her body and her choice of shoes was now hers again. Well almost. Her belly still seemed to belong to a pregnant woman, but by God, as soon as doctor told her she could, she was back to Daily Burn. This bulging flesh would be tamed once again.

  Funny, she felt like she should feel more. After all, this was the place she had seen her late husband on a slab, a veritable forest of autopsy sutures poking out of his flesh.

  Instead though, she felt calm. Not a real calm. Not peace for certain. No, it was like she was walking in the eye of the storm. A storm of fury at the man who had snatched her husband away. The fury steeled her. It kept the grief at bay.

  She felt full of white hot fury.

  She hurried down the hallway hoping that no one saw her. Although she had plenty of reason to visit the morgue, Nicole still wished to fly under the radar, at least for now.

  Hitting the swinging doors at a clipped pace, Nicole burst in, startling Joshua.

  “Whoa, recently pregnant woman alert. You’re still like a ninja!” the morgue attendant exclaimed, splashing the water he was cleaning the table with all over himself.