Sweet Montana Christmas

by Casey Dawes

  “That was wonderful,” he said.

  “Mmm,” was all she could get out.

  “I think I’ve worked up an appetite.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  His smile deepened, and her final defenses tumbled. She was dangerously close to falling in love, if she hadn’t already taken the plunge, and there were dangerous reefs ahead.

  No matter. She’d take what she could get while she had it. When winter came, whether it was sooner or later, she’d just wrap another quilt around her. She was a survivor. Losing her father had taught her that.

  “The pizza will be cold,” he said.

  “I’ll turn on the oven to low. Shouldn’t take too long to heat it up.”

  “Okay.” He opened two beers, and they went to the back porch while dinner got warm. He flicked on the tabletop heater she had, and they both wrapped themselves in the blankets she’d laid out on the chairs, reluctant to let the warmth of autumn go.

  For a few moments, they were silent, holding hands and staring up at the early stars.

  “When the sun decides to go south, it does it quickly in this part of the world,” he said.

  “Penalty for those long summer evenings.”

  “Do you think you’ll get tired of the long winters?”

  “Not for a while. I suppose if I live here long enough, I could consider becoming a snow bird, but there’s a lot of life to live before that happens.” She shifted, unsure what they were really talking about. Was he telling her he was leaving?

  Slam. Bang. Thank you, ma’am?

  She pushed the fears away. The evening was special, and she wasn’t going to ruin the mood.

  “How was your training?” she asked.

  “It was good.” He hesitated for a second, as if considering whether or not to say something. Then he launched into a description of the test fires he’d put out.

  “Shall we go in?” he asked when he’d wrapped up a discussion of new techniques, including some type of management training. “Pizza should be ready.”

  “Sure.”

  He deftly served the pie onto plates and set them on the table.

  “Have you thought about your Christmas list?” he asked.

  “Not really. I don’t like this custom of putting out Christmas stuff before Thanksgiving—although I did see some really neat displays at Costco. I’m thinking lit reindeer in the front yard.”

  “That would look cool. I’ll be happy to set them up for you.”

  He’d be around through the holidays. Her heart gave a little leap.

  “That’d be great.” She told him about the different molds they’d gotten for Christmas—trees, snowmen, and Santas. “We’re going to try some colored icing for decoration. Maybe add some truffle flavoring to it—make the outside a sample of the inside filling.”

  “Yum. I’m glad I’m still your taster. You haven’t replaced me while I’ve been gone, have you?”

  She shook her head and laughed.

  “Now what about that list? I’m eager to get started. I’m sure some of those items are going to be interesting to find.”

  What if she put her heart’s desire on that list? What would he do then?

  “I’ll think about it. You still have duty on Thanksgiving?”

  “Yep. They’ll post the Christmas duties next week. I should be free. We can spend it together.”

  “I usually spend the holidays with my grandmother.”

  “Oh.” His smile sagged.

  Would her grandmother be okay if she went to Seattle before Christmas? Maybe her mom would come up from Texas, too. She sighed. Her life was much more complicated with the store. It wasn’t like a job with benefits, like real vacations. But the only boss she had to tolerate was herself.

  “I probably won’t be gone too long—what with the store and everything. I can’t leave everything on Julie. That isn’t fair. So I could arrange to be back for the holiday. If you’re free, that is.”

  “Depending on my schedule, I could help out for a few days, if you wanted.”

  “You’d do that?”

  “Of course.” He squeezed her hand. “I care for you, Sue Anne. A lot.”

  Care. The word fell flat.

  She should ask.

  But the truth was she didn’t want to know.

  “I’ll have to think about it,” she said. “But thanks.” She gave his hand a squeeze back. Maybe she was reading too much into his statement.

  “That was wonderful,” he said after they cleaned up. “We’ll have to do it again sometime.” He grinned and circled his arms around her. “You are a beautiful, sexy woman.” He kissed her, a quick touch of his lips. “I’d take you right back to that bedroom, but I need to get ready for my shift.” He grimaced. “My payment for getting to go to Dallas—graveyard shift.”

  She was never going to get used to his hours—ten hours a day for four days in a four-week rotation. “So you’ll be on that shift until the end of the month?”

  “Yep. Means lots of Sunday afternoon matinees and early dinners. Of course...” He pulled her close. “Afternoon matinees come in all kinds of flavors.” He kissed her again, a little more heat in his lips. “Damn, girl,” he said after he released her, “you know how to kiss.”

  “So do you.”

  “Mmm, I love compatibility.”

  He slid on his jacket.

  “I’ll give you a call so we can figure out the next time we can go out, okay?”

  “Sure.”

  “And, Sue Anne, don’t forget your list.”

  As she watched the door close behind him, the chill from the night air settled in her heart. Whether or not he’d said it, even if she didn’t want to hear it, he’d made up his mind. He was leaving Missoula.

  And her.

  Chapter 19

  “Anyone here?” a voice shouted from the front of the store.

  “Be right there,” Sue Anne called out from the kitchen.

  She stopped short when she saw who waited for her.

  Reed.

  She’d hoped he’d gone away for good, but no such luck.

  Wanting a barrier between them, she stepped behind the left-hand display case.

  “You’re looking good, Sue Anne,” Reed said, an overeager expression making his lips take on a wolflike quality.

  “What can I get you today?”

  “There’s a good band playing down at the Eagles Lodge tonight. I’d love it if you came with me. So, you could give me a ‘yes.’” He looked pleased with his cleverness.

  “Not interested. Do you want anything from the store?” She realized her mistake as soon as the words left her mouth. “Besides me, that is.”

  “Now, don’t be like that, Sue Anne. You know you still like me.”

  “I like you less and less every time I see you.” How could she have gone out with this creep? Even if Zach left tomorrow, her choice in men had improved.

  “Where’s your rent-a-cop? I blame him, you know. If he hadn’t shoved his way into your life, you’d still be seeing me. I could be your taster and working on your marketing.”

  “I’m fine. And Zach had nothing to do with you and me.”

  “C’mon, Sue Anne.”

  The whine in his voice got to her.

  “What is it with you, Reed? There are thousands of other women in Missoula. Why are you so fixated on me? Get out of my life and stay out.”

  “Hey.” He shrugged. “It’s a free country. This is a business. I have every right to be here.” He picked up a pack of chocolates and tossed them on the counter, breaking several in the process. “Oops. Guess I’ll need a fresh bag.”

  She came out from behind the counter.

  “Get out. I don’t need your business, and I don’t need you. Harass me again, and I’ll report you to the cops.”

  “Whoa.” He held up his hands, palms out. “Don’t go getting all wacko on me. I always thought you were a crazy bitch, and this proves it.”

  “Get. Out.” She stepped toward
him, ready to push him out if he wouldn’t go on his own.

  “Sure, Sue Anne. I’ll leave. But don’t expect me to give you any help in this crazy scheme of yours. In fact, I think I’ll do the opposite. You’ll regret you pushed me out of your life.”

  Sue Anne stared at the closing door.

  She wasn’t the one who was crazy.

  How far would Reed go to cause her harm?

  • • •

  Sue Anne had locked the shop after a successful Black Friday, but was still prepping for the following day, when a knock came at the door. She looked up warily before a smile of relief settled on her lips.

  “About time you got here.” She stood on her toes and kissed Zach’s cheek.

  “What’s that?” he said, capturing her lips with his for a satisfying hello kiss. “Mmm, better,” he added when he released her. He looked around. “Need help?”

  “Actually, yes.” His help would enable her to be done with the day more quickly. She led him back to the tiny storage area and handed him a basket full of packaged candy. “Stock.”

  “Yes, ma’am.” He saluted with a grin.

  Within a half hour, they had the store stocked and ready to go, working efficiently as the holiday tunes played in the background. The more they accomplished, the happier she became.

  I’m getting into the season. It had been a long time since she’d felt this free with Advent.

  Sorry, Dad. I still miss you, but there’s a new man in my life now.

  A warm presence filled her heart, and she felt the peace of forgiveness and understanding. It’s all I ever wanted for you, the presence seemed to say. I’ve lived my life. It’s time for you to live yours.

  With a breath of air, like angel’s wings brushing against her cheek, the spirit was gone, but the feeling of freedom filled her with possibilities.

  She glanced at Zach, some of her father’s love spilling over into her feelings for him. His steadfastness, caring, and the skill he used to elicit every possible response from her when they made love—she wanted it all.

  The fact that Sugar adored him didn’t hurt either.

  Her hands stopped moving.

  It was more than recognizing his appeal. She was in love with him.

  Crap. He was going to leave, and she’d have to pick up the pieces of her heart. She fought back the tears that threatened to spill down her cheeks.

  “Are we done, boss?” he asked. He pointed to the bags he’d brought. “Food’s getting cold.”

  “What? Oh. Sure.” She hurried to the back to hide the emotions threatening to overwhelm her. After placing the last amount of cut fudge into the fridge, she pressed a damp cloth to her face.

  Returning to the store, she sniffed the aroma coming from the bags. “Chinese. How traditionally Thanksgiving.”

  He laughed, and she led the way to the back apartment.

  She pulled out plates and dished out food while he gave Sugar the attention she demanded. “Beer or wine?” she asked. Lately, she’d taken to stocking her refrigerator with both.

  “Beer’ll do me. Thanks.”

  She popped a lid and handed him the bottle. She knew from experience he’d refuse a glass. Then she poured herself a glass of Riesling.

  “Here.” She handed him an envelope.

  “What’s this?”

  “My list. There is one thing I don’t think you’ll be able to get me, but I put it there anyway, thinking that maybe the real Santa could make my wish come true.”

  “I’ll do my best,” he said and gave her a hug. “Do you want me to look at this now or later?”

  “Later.”

  “Okay.” He stuffed it in his coat pocket.

  They settled onto the couch, and he flicked through the channels to an old classic. “Ready for A Christmas Story?” he asked.

  “Oh, God, I haven’t seen that movie in ages.”

  “Then we need to change that.” He grinned and lifted his beer. They clinked and settled into the movie she vaguely remembered seeing with her father.

  Life was good for now. Best enjoy it while she could.

  • • •

  “What’s slapping that shit-eating grin on your face?” Zach asked Pat as the two of them walked out to patrol the terminal.

  “Ellen comes in on Saturday.”

  “So she did it—gave up her business to be with you.”

  “I told you she would.”

  “That’d never happen with Sue Anne.” If Zach wanted a relationship with her, he was going to have to stay in Montana and upend his career plans. His throat constricted, and his head ached.

  “Different situations,” Pat said, nodding to a college couple obviously returning from the Thanksgiving holiday. “She’s been keeping that business holding on by a thread for years now. Something she inherited from one of her aunts. She was ready to let go.” The grin deepened. “We’re getting married in the spring, and then we’ll be ready to start a family.”

  “Quick going.”

  “Not really.” They walked toward the baggage claim. “We’ve known each other for several years. I was just looking for the right place—somewhere I could make enough money that wasn’t in the middle of wall-to-wall people. You can’t beat Missoula for that.”

  “Guess not.”

  “What’s up with you?” Pat gave him a gentle punch in the arm. “I’ve met your girl, and she’s great. You guys seem happy. The job is going well. What’s the problem?”

  “It’s not permanent.” Zach pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket, not sure why he was showing it to Pat except that the man who had been his rival had become his closest friend. “I got this on Saturday. They’re looking for people at LAX and invited me to apply.”

  “Why you?”

  “A guy from the fire class in Dallas works there. I ... told him I was interested in moving on to a bigger airport if I got the opportunity.”

  Pat shook his head. “The chief won’t like this. He gave you the chance in Dallas so you could work here—not move somewhere else. And what about Sue Anne? Are you just going to dump her?”

  “Sue Anne knows the score. I wouldn’t go right away. You know how long these things take. It could be months. Not until next year at the earliest.”

  “Uh-huh.”

  Zach could hear the disapproval in his tone.

  Truthfully, he was disappointed in himself. Pat was right; the chief had given him the opportunity, and he should stay for a few years at least. Nor could he shake the fact that he was acting like a heel with Sue Anne. He was making love to her on a regular basis, and he knew that was a form of commitment to a woman.

  But a chance at LAX...

  “How can I help you?” Pat said to an elderly man with a cane.

  “I can’t seem to make this dang thing work. I’m supposed to call my wife when I got in. She got me a new phone, and I can’t figure out how to call her.”

  “Let me see,” Pat said.

  Zach wondered off in another direction, his gaze taking in everything around him, alert for trouble or people who needed help but were too embarrassed to ask.

  Pat’s words gnawed at his conscience. Why was he being so stubborn about not staying in Missoula? Was there something about himself he was afraid to face?

  Could he come to grips with it before he made a decision that would fill his life with regrets?

  • • •

  “I have to go to Seattle for a few days,” Sue Anne told Zach over dinner a few nights later. “My grandmother is having her other knee done, and I need to help her out a bit. Julie says she can handle the shop.”

  Zach twirled the spaghetti carbonara on his fork. It was one of the simpler dishes he’d learned to cook for himself, and it pleased him to make her dinner when he could. She often whipped together a good meal for them, but since she was on her feet all day, he wanted to pamper her.

  “When are you going?”

  “Flying out Thursday morning and I’ll be back Sunday night.”

>   “I have to work on Sunday, but I can take you to the airport on Thursday morning if you can find someone to take you home.”

  “I’ll see if Julie can pick me up.”

  “Okay.”

  They ate in silence for a few moments, the letter inviting him to apply for another job sitting like a lead weight in his back pocket.

  “Is something bothering you?” she asked. “You seem quiet.”

  She was getting to know him too well. May as well rip off the Band-Aid.

  “I got a letter over the weekend from the human resources department at LAX,” he said.

  “Oh?” Her attempt at covering her concern and feigning interest didn’t quite stick.

  “One of the guys I met in Dallas recommended me for an opening. They want me to send a résumé.”

  “Oh.”

  He put down his fork and grabbed her hand. “Sue Anne, I was honest with you. I told you I wasn’t sure about staying in Missoula.”

  She slid her hand out.

  “I know. I just didn’t expect it would be this soon.” She set her own fork down. “I’m not really hungry anymore.”

  “It’s not going to happen for a while. There’s lots of time.”

  “To do what? Get closer so it hurts even more when you leave?” She pushed her plate to the center of the table. “I thought we were building something real here—something that would be more important than your need to prove you’re better than a mistake you made in Denver.”

  “It wasn’t just something that happened. I fucked up. Someone could have died.”

  “Give me a break. It was a drill. No one died. Yeah, you messed up, but you learned your lesson. If you were so intent on proving yourself, you should have stayed in Denver and proved yourself to the team you let down. I’m sure they would have given you another chance eventually.”

  His temper rose. Why couldn’t women understand it wasn’t that simple?

  “I couldn’t do that.” He pushed back his chair and started pacing.

  “Why not?”

  “Because they didn’t trust me anymore.”

  “Then it was up to you to build that trust again. It would have taken time, but you could have done it. Then you could have been in the airport you wanted instead of being stuck here in little old Missoula.”