Ruthless Protector (A Lawless Kings Novel Book 4)

by Sherilee Gray

  I need you, too.

  The words flew through my mind as he lay me down, pressing me into the mattress.

  But not just for this, and not just for tonight.

  I squeezed my eyes shut against those thoughts, shoved them from my mind. I couldn’t think like that. I needed to stop thinking like that.

  Then Jude was moving inside me again, and not thinking became easy.

  I planned on not thinking the rest of the night.

  “Let’s go, Tilly, you’ll miss the bus.”

  “Just a second!”

  I stood in the open door, waiting for my niece to finish doing her hair, because she was old enough to do it herself, apparently. I was out of a job already. I’d encouraged her, of course, but secretly, my heart hurt a little. I loved brushing her hair every morning, tying it up, or braiding it.

  I glanced up as she walked out, and grinned. Her ponytail was a little lopsided, but her cheeks were rosy with pride.

  “What do you think?” she said.

  “I think it looks beautiful…hang on, no, it looks amaaaazing,” I said, teasing her, imitating her and her new friend Amber. Everything was amaaaaazing.

  Tilly rolled her eyes and I followed her out the door, listening while she chatted. I loved how happy she was. That she’d finally found a good friend and the bullying problem was over with.

  That was partly thanks to Jude.

  Just thinking about him sent a thrill through me. After he’d carried me to bed last night, and he had me once more like he promised, we’d both fallen asleep in a heap, sweaty and sated.

  I’d woken to him talking on his phone at four in the morning. Something had come up with his job and he had to leave. He’d kissed me and told me he’d see me later. And I knew this time, he meant it. I’d see him later tonight.

  I wasn’t unhappy about that. I wanted to spend more time with him.

  In bed.

  Just in bed.

  Anything else was asking for trouble. I needed to set some ground rules. If we were going to be sleeping together, it needed to stay only that. No more dinners, or movie hangouts. No more spending time with Tilly and me, like we were something we weren’t. I didn’t want her to get her hopes up, only for them to be dashed when we moved.

  The bus pulled up and I waved as she climbed on and took her seat.

  Could I do that to her? Could I tear her away from the place, the people, she’d come to love? She had a best friend, she had Fay. She had a great place to live in a great neighborhood. Guilt pummeled me as I walked back to my house. But what else could I do? Leaving seemed to be my only option right now. Hiding was the only way to guarantee that Trent wouldn’t find us, wouldn’t try and take Tilly from me.

  I’d just walked by Fay’s house and was at the bottom of my stairs when the door opened. I turned back to greet her, only she wasn’t looking at me; she was standing in the doorway, hair down and mussed, feet bare, wearing nothing but a faded Beatles t-shirt.

  My mouth dropped open when Raul walked out. He was in the same suit as yesterday, his jacket draped over his arm. He turned to her and Fay blushed, a beautiful smile curving her lips. Even from where I was standing, I could see the way Raul sucked in a breath when he saw it. He reached for her, curling an arm around her waist, and tugged her closer, kissing her deeply goodbye.

  Her hands fluttered at her sides for a moment, then she wrapped them around his neck.

  That little hesitation from Fay told me this was new; she wasn’t sure how to proceed, but she wanted to, and I was so damn happy for her that tears sprung to my eyes.

  While they were occupied, I quickly dashed up the stairs as quietly as I could. I wanted her to tell me when she was ready, not railroad her into it because I caught them. Not when I knew she’d need time to process it on her own first.

  I’d just quietly shut the door behind me, when my phone rang.

  I didn’t recognize the number.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, beautiful,” Jude said, rough and sexy and gruff.

  “Hey.”

  “Listen, change of plans, I won’t be able to see you tonight. Van and I have to leave town for a couple of days.”

  There was an extra growl to his voice. “You’re not happy about this?” I asked, trying to disguise my disappointment.

  “No, I’m not fucking happy. I had plans, baby, plans I’d made for us, that I was seriously looking forward to.”

  I smiled despite myself, despite my misgivings about this whole thing. “I’m sure they were excellent plans.”

  “Woman, you have no idea.”

  My belly heated, zaps of pleasure making me suck in a sharp breath.

  “I heard that,” he said. “That little hitch. Christ, that’s hot, beautiful.”

  My breathing was erratic now. “When will I see you again?” As soon as the words passed my lips, I winced. How many times had I heard Rebecca say that to Trent. My mother to my father, right after he left, and he was still taking her calls.

  Evan, when we were first seeing each other, and I thought he was the only escape from my shitty life. That having a man, a good man, was my way to freedom. Only he hadn’t been a good man. He’d been a coward and a liar.

  “Two…maybe three days, tops.”

  My mind instantly threw up a warning. Don’t trust him. Don’t let him get too close. He’s only using you.

  But I knew that wasn’t true. Jude was nothing like the men I’d known. There was no resemblance between them. So, I ignored the scared, hurt, and angry part of me that was always there, the part telling me to push him away hard and fast, and said, “Will you share the plans you had for us with me then?”

  “Repeatedly,” he said, then released a long breath that was far from steady. “Fuck, this sucks.”

  I chuckled at how disgruntled he sounded.

  “Are you laughing at me?” he said.

  “No,” I said, laughter clear in my voice.

  “You are so gonna pay for that.”

  A sexy shiver moved through me. “Oh?”

  “Maybe that fine ass of yours needs a little spanking. Let’s see how wet that gets you before I fuck you next time.”

  Christ. I squeezed my legs together. “Only one way to find out.”

  Jude cursed again. “You home tonight?”

  I grinned. “Yes.”

  “Good, I’ll call you later to discuss this more.”

  “I’ll look forward to it.”

  He was quiet a beat. “Promise me you’ll stay safe,” he said.

  “Will do.”

  I was doing the dishes a little while later, and still smiling to myself, when my phone started ringing. Maybe Jude had a moment and wanted to get started on our discussion early?

  I quickly dried off my hands and answered. “Couldn’t wait, huh?”

  Silence. “Is this Willa Hartley?”

  It was a woman’s voice, one I didn’t recognize. “Who’s asking?”

  “Sorry, this is Karen Langley from Child Protective Services. Is this a good time to talk?”

  I stood as still as a statue, several long seconds ticking by, while my mind raced with a million different reasons why this woman would be calling, coming back to and rejecting the same one over and over, the one that involved Trent.

  “Are you there, Ms. Hartley?”

  I jolted. “Yes, ah, sorry, yes I’m here.”

  “Is now a good time to talk?”

  I sat at the kitchen table. “Yes, I can talk.” I wanted to hang up, to go straight to Tilly’s school, pick her up, and run. Run far away, because I knew. I just knew what she was going to say.

  “As you’re probably aware, Tilly’s father was recently released from prison. He contacted us, wanting to visit with his daughter, and I hoped we could meet to discuss visitation. In situations like this, the best outcome is always getting the children back with parents if possible, and if not, at least maintaining regular contact.”

  I sat there, numbly answerin
g her questions. I wanted to tell her it wasn’t going to happen, but Trent still had rights. The fact that I had custody right now didn’t change that. She made an appointment for me to meet with her the day after tomorrow.

  I tried to call Trent as soon as I disconnected, but he didn’t answer.

  I hadn’t given him what he wanted, and he was using Tilly, to make sure the next time I did.

  16

  Jude

  I tried Willa’s phone again—and again, it went to voicemail.

  Cursing, I dropped my phone on the bedside table. I’d tried to call her the night I went away, but she hadn’t answered then either. Texts didn’t cut it. I wanted, shit, needed to hear her voice right now. There was no point pretending anymore, not to myself. I had feelings for this girl. Strong ones, and after a night like tonight, a case like this, talking to her, hearing the sweet, sexy rasp in her voice, her teasing, would have gone a long way to calming my shit down.

  A muffled grunt came from the fucker I had hogtied and gagged on the other side of the room. Van and I had worked him over pretty good, but he wasn’t talking, and I was this close to tearing him limb from limb and letting him bleed out all over the puke-yellow carpet.

  Van came out of the bathroom, dark eyes sliding to me. “Time’s running out. We don’t find this woman and her kid in the next couple of hours, it’s gonna be too late.”

  Fuck. He was right.

  The sadistic asshole currently keeping us company had been charged with beating his wife and child. He’d missed his court date, skipped town, but not before paying his family one last visit. They’d vanished. We’d found this twisted fucker after a convo with his brother. We’d learned he’d planned to get rid of them, so they couldn’t testify against him. Which meant it could already be too late.

  Van’s phone started ringing, and he quickly left the room to answer it.

  I stared at the piece of shit on the floor, seeing red. I was so close to battering the motherfucker until he was a lifeless heap it wasn’t funny. Staying where I was, wasn’t easy, especially as images of Kate, bruises on her beautiful face, Louis scared, crying, clinging to her, filled my head.

  It wasn’t our skip on the floor anymore, it was Wayne, my brother-in-law. Knuckles raw from hitting the two people I’d loved most in the world.

  I took a step toward him…

  My phone beeped, pulling me up short. I checked the screen quickly, heart pounding, more than a little freaked at what I’d been about to do. What I still wanted to do.

  Willa: Hey, sorry I missed your calls. I ended up working a double yesterday and was totally wiped.

  I stared down at the small screen; just seeing her name helped calm me. I quickly typed out a reply.

  Tell me why I shouldn’t kill the fucker we have in custody?

  Willa: What did he do?

  I almost laughed out loud at her response. Willa knew there was evil in this world, of course she did. You only had to meet her to know she’d experienced some of that firsthand.

  I typed out my reply. He hurt his wife and kid.

  Her reply was almost instant. I hope you kicked his ass.

  Oh yeah.

  Willa: Good.

  My mind was fucking with me. Knowing Willa had been through something and not knowing what it was, suddenly I had the red rage back in full force, all sorts of shit filling my head.

  Not helpful, beautiful. I need a reason not to end this fucker.

  Willa: We can’t fuck if you’re in the pen, big man.

  I barked out a laugh, the sound unexpected, rusty.

  Van walked back in. “Got a lead.” He looked at me, where I was standing, the look on my face that obviously hadn’t quite lost all of the I’m-gonna-end-this-motherfucker, then down at the sniveling and bleeding asshole on the floor, and back to me.

  “I’ll stay with him,” he said, wisely. “Zeke and Ruby are already on their way. They’ll meet you there.”

  Van rattled off the location and I headed out, quickly tapping out a reply to Willa as I went. You just saved someone’s life.

  I hit send, and then a thought raced through me that almost had me stumbling.

  Every moment I spent with Willa, I felt like one of the shattered pieces inside me had been put back in place. No, I couldn’t be fixed—what almost happened back there was proof of that. No matter how many pieces were glued back together, the cracks would always be there, but each piece that got put back, meant that gaping hole inside me, didn’t feel quite so big, so empty.

  I realized Willa was saving someone’s life.

  Mine.

  Willa

  The next couple of weeks went by so fast. My shifts at Stilettos, making sure Tilly and I had enough time together, just the two of us, and when she was asleep, either Jude or I making use of the internal stairs to Jude’s place for a midnight visit.

  Every time I left his bedroom, or him mine, I told myself it had to be the last, but then I’d hear his bike when he got home, or he’d let himself in and tap on my bedroom door, all big and brooding and sexy as all get out, and I was lost.

  And truthfully, I’d been happy for the distraction. The news was grim. Another woman, a prostitute, had gone missing in the city this week. The police had no leads, and since Fiona, no more bodies had been found. Raul was edgy and security was at an all-time high. I appreciated it, of course, but it also made me nervous.

  After my meeting with child welfare, a visit with Trent had been organized. I’d done my best to prepare Tilly, but neither of us were ready when we woke up that morning, knowing Trent would be coming. I’d asked Fay to be there, because I knew he wouldn’t threaten me with her in the house. Tilly sure as hell didn’t need to see that.

  I’d purposely kept the visit from Jude. I had a feeling he’d make sure he was there, and if he was, he’d recognize Trent as the asshole who set me up at the poker game. He’d demand answers, answers I couldn’t give him yet. Tilly and I didn’t need that kind of drama, not today.

  Fay arrived, and now Tilly and I were sitting on the couch, her hand clutching mine so tight it had to be hurting her. Trent had never been physically violent to Tilly, but she’d seen him and her mother using drugs, had seen what it did to Rebecca. She told me once she was afraid he’d make her take drugs, like he had her mom.

  I also found out after she moved in with me, that he’d said a lot of not so nice things to her when he wanted her out of the way. Rebecca had tried to shield her, but her addiction had come first, no matter how much she’d loved her daughter.

  There was a loud knock at the door, and Tilly jumped.

  Fay’s gaze shot to mine and the look in her eyes took me back. Mama-bear-ready-to-defend-her-cubs. My heart warmed, and I stood on shaky legs, squeezing her shoulder as I walked past. Tilly scooted up the couch, so she was by Fay, and Fay wrapped a protective arm around her.

  I still couldn’t believe how lucky I was to have her.

  Her and Jude.

  Right then, I wished he was there with us. Big and strong, his calming presence there to make Tilly feel safe.

  To keep me from falling apart.

  Drawing in a steadying breath, I opened the door.

  Trent stood there, a wide smarmy grin on his face. He looked like he had someone else’s clothes on. Someone bigger than him. His hair was slicked back, his skin shiny with a layer of sweat.

  “Where’s my baby girl? I bet she’s dying to see her daddy,” he said, then leaned in to say something to me, something only I’d hear, but I jerked back out of range. His eyes narrowed, but I ignored that too. If he had something to say, some threat to make, he could do it when Tilly wasn’t nearby.

  “You better come in.”

  He walked by me and his gaze slid to Fay. “What’s she doing here?”

  I forced myself to look at him. “This is my support person.”

  He muttered under his breath, then looked at Tilly. “Come here, kid. Come and give your old man a hug.”

  Tilly
shook her head.

  Trent’s eyes narrowed. “I said come here.”

  Tilly curled into Fay and I stepped in front of him. “She hasn’t seen you in nearly a year. You need to back off,” I gritted under my breath.

  He grabbed my elbow and led me from the living room down to the kitchen. “What the hell have you said about me to her?”

  I yanked my arm free. “Not a damn thing. That reaction was all your own doing.”

  “Lying bitch,” he hissed. “I told you what I’d do if you didn’t give me all my money. I told you. You made me do this, remember that.” He stared me down. “Now I’m going back in there to watch some TV with my kid, and you think about that. You think about how much you want her, and what you’re willing to do to keep her.”

  He walked back to the living room and I heard the TV come on. I went back down and sat on the other side of Tilly, and the four of sat there, Trent watching a movie and ignoring us until his time was up.

  He didn’t try and talk to her again during that time, barely even looked her way. Finally, he stood, looked at me, and said, “I’ll be in touch.”

  And left.

  Tilly sat there shaking, shaken by that visit in a way that made me want to go after Trent and choke the last breath from him. Another visit like that, and I didn’t know what would happen, how it would affect her; if it would have her regressing back to when she pretended her mother was alive, or manifest into something worse.

  I had to do something.

  I stood quickly. “Be right back,” I said to Fay, and rushed out after Trent.

  He hadn’t gotten far and he stopped when I called out to him. He didn’t meet me halfway, making me walk over to him, beady eyes calculating. He knew he had me where he wanted me.

  We both did.

  “What will it take?” I said, when I reached him. “To have you sign over all your parental rights to me. To stay away from her, from both of us, for good?”

  “Twenty grand,” he said instantly.

  He’d planned this, all of it. He hadn’t pulled that figure out of his ass. He knew exactly what it would take, and he knew I’d do anything to get it. To get him out of our lives.