Justify My Love: An Interracial Romance (BWWM)

by Caine, Candy

  * * *

  Getting into her car, Marnie felt marvelous. This was an important win for so many reasons. Of course, she wanted Marie to rightfully retain custody of her children. That had been her primary goal. However, winning this case helped solidify her position at Conway, Jones and Freed. It brought her one step closer to partnership. Frank, whose number she was now calling, was going to be pleased. Out of nowhere an errant thought came: Scott would be pleased, too. That last thought widened the smile already on her face. Then a tiny, inner voice added, “And Jason?”

  “Frank Conway.”

  “It’s over, Frank. Ralph Reynolds capitulated. Marie gained full custody of the girls.”

  “Terrific! You did one helluva job.”

  “I agree with you there,” Marnie said flippantly.

  Frank chuckled. “Your modesty overwhelms me. On your way back?”

  “Uh-huh. Oh, by the way, you were right. Piperno did hit on me.”

  “It was iffy, actually. Consider yourself special.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  “ According to my sources, you’re actually too old for him.”

  It was Marnie’s turn to laugh. “See you soon.”

  Driving back to the office, Marnie silently thanked the Supreme Being who occupied the heavens above and all her lucky stars for winning the case. In the deepest part of her she was well aware of the consequences of failing and couldn’t afford to fail. This constant need to prove herself to her parents would always be there, overshadowing everything she did. She stopped herself from going down that slippery slope of past memories. Thinking about her family always had a disturbing negative effect on her.

  She felt like a conquering hero when she got off the elevator. News of her victory had spread throughout the floor rapidly and everyone congratulated her as she passed by their desk or office.

  Her administrative assistant, Debbie, threw her arms around her and nearly hugged the breath from her body. “Great going. Frank is in his office waiting for you.”

  “Thank you,” Marnie said, dropping her leather briefcase on her desk and slipping her purse into a drawer.

  Marnie’s heart nearly skipped a beat when she saw Scott sitting in Frank’s office. He rose as she walked in, taking both her hands into his and placed a kiss on her cheek. “Congratulations, Counselor. “I’ll see you tomorrow night.” Then he smiled and walked out of Frank’s office.

  “You really did a great job with the Reynolds case. Thank you.” Frank’s dark brown eyes were sincere.

  “You’re so very welcome. I’m really exhausted, so I think I’ll head home.”

  “Go on. I’ll see you Monday. I want you to interview a new client. It would seem that you’re going to be doing divorce cases for a while.”

  She rolled her eyes. I’m going to be really prepared if I ever need one. Have a good weekend,” Marnie said, and started for the door.

  “Marnie…”

  She stopped and turned.

  “You need to get married first. Have a nice time with Scott.”

  She smiled.

  Chapter Five

  Marnie went home and heated up a frozen dinner. Afterward, she decided to reward herself with a glass of wine and a bubble bath. As she soaked in the warm water and the tension in her muscles began to melt away, an image of Scott in the Laundromat appeared behind her eyes, sensing the power that coiled within him as he walked. She visualized his muscles flexing as she ran her hands through his black hair. Her breath quickened as she felt a tug in her groin.

  She ran her mind’s eye down his broad chest and narrow hips as she slowly circled her nipple with a sudsy fingertip before tugging and kneading it. The tingles in her pussy began to grow and she felt her blood coursing through her veins like a river. As she continued to tease her nipple, she allowed her other hand to wander south. She traced the folds of her inner labia and began to rub her clit, imagining it was Scott’s hands and not her own.

  As her arousal grew, she rubbed herself faster and faster until she finally climaxed.

  She wondered what type of lover Scott would make, not that she had many to compare. Jason had been her first and had initiated her into the joys of sex. At the time, she’d felt that he was the one for her and gave into the urgings of her body, leaving the precautions of her mind and a stern Baptist upbringing behind.

  She wasn’t sorry, though at this moment in time, she really didn’t know how she felt about Jason. It wasn’t as if she’d stopped caring for him. Her feelings for him were in limbo. She had no idea where he was or when he’d be coming back. Nor did she know where their relationship stood. She found herself growing weary of his procrastination. From his past behavior, she now knew he’d probably never settle down—at least not in the near future. Perhaps he was afraid of commitment. The reasons for this attitude escaped her. Though she thought she knew Jason, as intimately as a person could know another, she realized that she really didn’t know him at all.

  Where had he been for the last week? He’d never disappeared like that before without a word. Had something terrible actually happened to him? She wondered, feeling a tinge of guilt for not calling. No. Recalling the light tone of his messages, she doubted that strongly. He most likely stayed away because he wanted to. Besides, the last phone message Jason left, she remembered him saying that he’d call her. That seemed enough to erase most of the budding guilt she felt, giving her an out. She could always say that she had been waiting for his call. Cheesy, but doable.

  Next to being a lawyer, Marnie wanted more than anything to settle down with one man and have children. Coming from a dysfunctional family, she wanted better. Thinking of her own siblings, she didn’t want to have children who plotted and competed against one another. But lately, her desire for marriage seemed nothing more than an elaborate pipe dream.

  The water cooled. Marnie got out of the tub and toweled dry. The excitement from winning the case, her soaring climax, the soothing hot bath and glass of wine had totally relaxed her. She was becoming drowsy enough for bed.

  * * *

  Marnie woke up the next morning filled with the joy and excitement of anticipation. She was seeing Scott Langley that night, something she’d looked forward to all week. She got her chores done early, including cleaning the apartment and doing her laundry. She was able to do it in the laundry room for a change. She kept telling herself she had to move to a place with better laundry facilities. Only, who had the time to check out new places to live?

  Her mind bounced back to Scott. Though their first meeting was far from civil, each time she saw him, he stirred feelings deep inside her. There was something about him that drew her to him, like a lodestar. Thinking back to how and where they first met, she wondered if fate could be involved. She hardly believed in coincidences and his turning out to be Frank’s godson was a huge one. At second glance, he didn’t appear to be as shallow as she first thought him to be. There definitely was something of substance below that smooth, attractive exterior of his. And she personally wanted to explore that unseen territory.

  She decided to wear a short, navy-blue, silk dress that emphasized her curves and ample behind. Hopefully, she’d elicit the right response from Scott. And what kind of response was that, she wondered?

  Scott had called earlier, sounding upset. At first Marnie feared he might be canceling their date and pulling a Jason move. Instead, much to her relief, he asked if she could meet him at the restaurant. He had muttered something about a “last minute complication”. She speculated what that might be as she applied eyeliner to emphasize the almond shape of her eyes. Well, whatever it was, she hopped it wouldn’t spoil Scott’s mood and ultimately ruin the evening. She had already seen him in a lousy mood.

  Taking a last-minute perusal of herself and finding everything in order, Marnie put on her coat and grabbed her purse, locking the door behind her.

  Scott had selected a very expensive restaurant called Umberto’s. The wait staff wore evening clothes a
nd no male was admitted into the dining room without a suit jacket and tie. She’d dined there once before, so she was aware of the formal attire even before Scott had mentioned the place was fancy.

  As she neared the restaurant, a feeling of giddiness washed over her. She suddenly felt like a teenager going out on her first important date with the guy she’d had her eye on for ages. She chuckled at these feelings; a grown woman with the overactive hormones of a teenager.

  The restaurant, a two-story structure modeled after the casinos on the Riviera in Monte Carlo, was crowded and bustling with activity. A mingling of mouth-watering aromas filled the air. The maitre d let her to a cozy table and pulled out the chair for her.

  “Would you care for a drink while you wait for your gentleman?”

  “That would be nice. A glass of white wine, please.”

  He nodded and a few minutes later, a waiter brought her the drink. She thanked him and looked around the room at the other guests who seemed happily engrossed in their own private conversations. Sipping her wine, she realized she was a trifle early so she paced herself, drinking slowly, while she waited for Scott.

  Uncomfortable that she was alone to begin with in such a fancy place, each passing minute felt more like an hour. Marnie must have checked her watch a hundred times. Ten minutes passed, then twenty. When she had been sitting there nearly a half-hour, she’d become concerned and signaled the waiter.

  “More wine, miss?”

  “No. Would you be so kind to check and see if there have been any calls for Marnie Davis?”

  “Certainly,” he said courteously and departed.

  Moments later, he returned and confirmed that there hadn’t been any messages.

  Damn! Where could he be? Suddenly, terrible thoughts and images fought for control of her mind. Perhaps he’d been in an accident? She took out her cell phone and was about to call the nearest hospital when she reined in her vivid imagination, keying in Scott’s cell number instead.

  “Hello?”

  “Hel—lo!” a feminine voice purred. She was about to say something else when the phone was whisked away and she heard, “Hello?”

  “Scott?”

  “Marnie? Damn it! Get off of me and lower that infernal noise.”

  “Who are you speaking to?”

  “Nobody—nobody important.”

  “Well for some nobody, she’s obviously more important than me.”

  “Oh, no! What time is it?”

  “Much too late, I assure you,” Marnie replied angrily.

  “You’re at the restaurant! Oh, Marnie, I’m so sorry. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

  “Don’t bother, I won’t be here.”

  “What do you want me to do?”

  “For starters, don’t double-book dates next time,” she said nastily before disconnecting.

  * * *

  “Damn it, Angel! Why do you have to come and flip out whenever I have important things planned?”

  Angel couldn’t have cared less even if she could think rationally. She was so stoned on whatever drugs she had shot into her arm that Scott nearly had to tie her to a chair to prevent her from hurting herself.

  His stepsister had appeared at his door earlier in the afternoon, dirty and disheveled. Her long, straw-colored hair looked dark and matted with God knew what. The pale skin on her stringy arms was puckered and her veins bruised from needle pricks. Where she’d been for the last few months was as big a mystery as what made her tick. She‘d been nothing but trouble since his father died, and more often than not, an embarrassment. Scott had gotten her into several rehab programs, but she never lasted in any for more than a week. It was as if she were trying to destroy herself and everyone else she encountered along the way.

  Only Frank knew about Angel. Scott would have eventually told Marnie about his stepsister, but not before they had a solid relationship. Nobody wants to know the guy they’re seeing has a drug addicted whore for a sister, even if they’re not related by blood. Now if he ever wanted to have a chance with Marnie again, he’d have to confide in her about his sister. The hard part would be getting her to believe him. At the moment, he could just imagine what she must think of him.

  * * *

  Furious, Marnie signaled the waiter and handed him a twenty-dollar bill to cover her drink.

  “Is your gentleman friend coming?”

  “No. Business complications, I’m afraid. I must go now. Thank you,” she said, fleeing from the restaurant, mortified she’d been stood up.

  Well, actually, she should have gone with her first instincts. She‘d originally pegged Scott for a playboy, so why was she surprised over his behavior? Unfortunately those thoughts were little consolation for the anger that was building within her. It annihilated any disappointment she might have felt. She was furious at him for standing her up, but blamed herself for allowing it to happen. Why hadn’t she trusted her instincts?

  She started her car and drove home fuming. Her track record with men was appalling. What the hell was wrong with her? Why did she appear to be attracted to the wrong kind of guy? Was it her judgment that was flawed? Or could it be possible there was only one type of man out there? Whatever happened to the sanctity of marriage and wanting to live one’s life with only one woman? Did she have to swear off men to prevent having a reoccurrence? Then, at least, there’d be no more bad choices along with its painful consequences.

  Just as Marnie opened her door, her cell phone chirped. Her first thought was that it was Scott and to ignore it, however it was Jason’s name that appeared on the caller ID. Angrily she wondered what the fuck did he want? Was he in need of another booty call? She hadn’t heard from him in over a week. How dare he assume she cared to see him? Two weeks ago, she was ready to spend her entire life with him. Now she wasn’t sure if she could bear being with him at all, knowing he’d never have the courage to commit. Maybe she should break things off with him, as well. It was easier on the phone, so she answered.

  “Hi, babe! I’m back. I need to talk to you.”

  “That’s nice, but I’m not in the mood to talk to you.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” Jason asked.

  “It means you can’t pop in and out of my life like a ball,” Marnie replied angrily.

  “Why are you copping an attitude without knowing where I’ve been?”

  “So where have you been all this time?”

  “In recovery,” Jason replied.

  “Recovery? Were you in a car accident?” Her mindset shifted. Did he actually have a valid reason? Then she cautioned herself. Using his playbook rules, shouldn’t he have told her sooner?

  “No. Nothing like that. The morning of the dinner I bent down to tie my sneakers at the gym and got an awful a muscle spasm. From there, I went straight to the doctor and he shot me full of cortisone. The pain subsided and I was able to walk.”

  “So you could have gone to the dinner?” Marnie asked.

  “No, not really. The doctor wanted me to stay off my feet.”

  “Which you did the entire week?”

  “Yes. I stayed at my sister, Cal’s, place,” Jason replied.

  “She took care of you along with her three kids?”

  “No…not exactly.”

  “Well, Jason, what exactly did happen last week? I get the feeling that you’re trying very hard not to tell me anything.”

  “You remember Ivy, Cal’s friend?”

  A vision of a tall, big boobed, oversexed woman with bottle-bleached blond hair flashed at the back of Marnie’s mind. The last time she had seen her at a Christmas dinner, she was very married and very pregnant. “Isn’t she happily married with children?”

  “Child.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “She’s now divorced and has only one child, a little girl,” he corrected.

  “Well, I’m certainly glad we gotten that straightened out.”

  “Marnie, why are you making this tougher for me?”

  “Makin
g what tougher? Did you sleep with her? Is that what this is all about?”

  Jason let out a big sigh. “She was tending me; night and day…it just happened.”

  Skyrockets went off in Marnie’s head. “Is this the first time or have you been cheating on me all along, Jason?”

  There was a silence at the end of the line that spoke volumes. “Marnie, I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. Maybe we can start over…”

  Marnie could feel the tension within her tightening further. “Start over? Don’t bother calling back, Jason. We’re done.”

  “Are you serious about this, Marnie?” Incredibly he sounded incredulous.

  “Like a heart attack. We’re through.”

  “There’s no crawling back to me,” Jason said.

  “You got that right. Besides, I never crawl since I already know how to walk. And I’m walking away from this sorry relationship. Goodbye, Jason. Have a nice life.” She broke the connection.

  If only her parents could see her now, they’d never let her hear the end of it. Especially after she refused to marry the deacon’s son. Growing up, Marnie always tried to be the one child her parents could count on to do the right thing. There wasn’t a thing she wouldn’t do for them. It took a long time for Marnie to realize that in trying so hard to please them, she’d allowed them to mold and run her life. Striving for whatever token of love she could wrench from their close-fisted hearts, she lived a life she knew they’d approve of. It wasn’t until that one fateful argument that she’d finally seen the light and cut the cord. She could still feel the pain as if it were yesterday.

  Her brother, Marty, had always been her mother’s favorite. He knew it and took advantage of his mother’s love. Blinded by this overpowering love, her mother ignored the fact that he was a total screw-up. They were eighteen months apart, Marnie being the eldest. Her sister, Mandy, a change of life baby, learned early in life that squeaky hinges got attention and used temper tantrums to achieve her goals. Marnie couldn’t stand either of her siblings, though she tried to tolerate them for family’s sake.