Dragonbane_[AN_SK]

by Sherrilyn Kenyon

  He’d turned to his dragon form as soon as he could and flew to the safety of his only haven. Sera would be furious over this. He knew it. She never liked it whenever he angered her queen. There would be plenty of screaming to come later.

  But he wasn’t a whore to be bartered. And while he’d do anything to please his mate, this was where he drew the line. He would deal with Sera’s fury. But he was through being treated like an inanimate object with no will of his own.

  Yes, his heart was that of an animal. Loyal. Fierce. Protective. He didn’t understand the duplicity and lies of her people. Most of all, he didn’t understand the betrayal and sneakiness.

  Honestly, he wished Sera could understand why he didn’t want to stay home without her.

  These are my sisters. We take care of each other.

  Do I not care for you?

  It’s not the same, Maxis. You don’t understand the bond of sisterhood we share. I have an oath to uphold.

  And what of our bond? Your word to your mate?

  The Fates forced us together.

  The same Fates who put you with your sisters. Your ties to them are no stronger than your ties to me. So no, I don’t understand your loyalty to them over that of your own mate. Why will you not come away with me?

  I can’t leave everything I know to be with you.

  Why not? I left my world for you.

  It’s not the same.

  Because I’m not human?

  And there the argument always stopped, because it all came down to that one fact. He was an animal unworthy of her human’s heart.

  She’d dreamed of finding a man to love. Max would never be anything except a disappointment to her. No matter what he said or did. When she looked into his eyes, she didn’t see a man there.

  She saw an untamed beast. One who embarrassed her.

  Heartbroken over the anger he knew she’d unleash on him when she returned, he’d lumbered into his cave where he’d gathered all the items that fell under his aegis and damned every one of them. With his tail, he whipped at them, hating what he was.

  Hating the fact that his dragon’s heart loved a human woman who was incapable of loving him.

  And that was why he stayed, in spite of the animosity and challenges.

  Because deep inside, where he hated it most, was the hope that one day Sera would look past his heart and see his soul that belonged to her. That she would learn not to despise him for something he couldn’t help any more than she could help being born into a group of mean-spirited bitches.

  But hopes and dreams were for humans.

  And so it appeared, was love.

  Seraphina pulled away as she came back to her own body. For a full minute, she couldn’t move or breathe as she listened to the steady beating of Maxis’s heart. As she replayed his memories and felt a blinding rage consume her.

  This time, it wasn’t at him. It was for the ones who truly deserved it.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” she whispered.

  “You never listened.”

  He was right. Pushing herself up, she stared down into those wounded eyes and traced the line of his lips with the tip of her fingertips. “I’m so sorry.” For the first time, she saw humanity through his eyes and understood exactly what Aimee had meant.

  All her life, she’d focused on the clan of Katagaria that had attacked her village and killed her mother. She still didn’t know why they’d done that.

  A killing, animal rampage. That was all she’d ever been told. It was what Katagaria did. All they knew. They were wild animals that killed indiscriminately and without conscience.

  They didn’t care who or what they destroyed. They were incapable of understanding.

  But Maxis was right. He’d never shown that side to her.

  Well, the rolling head a few minutes ago, notwithstanding. Yet she could excuse that. She’d have done worse had she been there to save her children.

  For the first time, she looked at her mate and didn’t search for the human inside him.

  She saw his animal heart for what it was. Beautiful.

  And realized that was what she’d fallen in love with. That it was the animal inside him that she treasured above all else. It was what made him Maxis. What made him different from other men.

  Frowning, he brushed his fingers against her cold cheeks. “Why are you crying?”

  “Because I hurt you when I shouldn’t have. I listened to others when I should have kept counsel with you alone. And most of all because I know I don’t deserve the second chance I’m about to ask you for.”

  Max sucked his breath in sharply at her words. He could sense that she meant them. But she’d “meant” them before and he’d lived to regret trusting her.

  “I don’t know, Sera. So much has happened between us.”

  “It has. I know I have no right to ask this of you.” She took his hand in hers and kissed his palm. “Can I share a memory with you?”

  He hesitated before he nodded. “Just think of it and I’ll see it.”

  She had so many memories she wanted to show him of their children. But there was one in particular he should see.

  It was when their twins had first entered puberty. They’d been terrified of their emotions and magick.

  Hadyn in particular had been skittish. In retrospect, she realized that he must have suspected that he was changing over from human to Katagari. As such, he’d been even more resistant to his newfound powers than Edena. It also hadn’t made it easier that Arcadians frowned on anyone who gave in to their animal nature and transformed.

  Her people considered it weak to shapeshift. While other Arcadian patrias had their own laws and customs, hers were expected to maintain their human forms, no matter what.

  But her children weren’t like the others and she knew that. Most of all, she wanted them to feel closer to the father they’d never met.

  To help them come to terms with who and what they were, Seraphina had taken them to the cave that had belonged to Maxis. Her hopes had been to put them in touch with their noble father.

  Hadyn had pulled up short as soon as they reached the entrance. “What’s that scent?”

  “Your father. This was his lair while he lived with me.”

  That had changed both their attitudes. They entered the cave and looked around as if seeking some kind of connection to the dragonswain they’d never met.

  Edena had scowled at her. “Why did you bring us here?”

  “So that you could change into a dragon and not fear what you are.”

  Hadyn’s grimace made a mockery of his sister’s. “Ragna says that we should never unleash the beast inside us. Once it’s free, it’s hard to suppress.”

  “And they are born Arcadians. You two aren’t. Your father was a fierce, proud dragonswain and you should never be ashamed of that part of yourselves. Because you’re mixed, I’m thinking you might have special abilities as a dragon that the others lack. You might even be able to hold that form longer. The very least, you should try it and see.”

  Edena had screwed her face up. “I don’t know.”

  “I’ll do it.” Hadyn had stepped deeper into the cave, making sure to put plenty of room between them. He flashed them a bright smile. “Watch this!” An instant later, he’d taken his dragon form.

  Fear had stolen Sera’s breath, but she quickly hid it from her son.

  He’d stumbled about, much the same way Max and Illarion had when they’d first been transformed into humans. He couldn’t quite seem to get the hang of his huge dragon body. “Oh, this is so weird.” Then he’d slapped his tail into the wall. “Ow! Have to watch that.” He jerked it back and smacked himself in the head with the barbed end.

  Instantly, he’d returned to being human so he could rub the unintended injury he’d done himself. “Oh my God! Is that blood?” He’d held his hand out to his mother. “Look at that. I’m bleeding!”

  Trying not to laugh, Sera ran to him while Edena had mocked her brave brother.
>
  “Oh my God! Only my idiot twin could knock himself out with his own tail. How stupid are you?”

  “You do it and see how hard that thing is to control. I swear it has a mind of its own.”

  “No, sugar, that’s your front tail.”

  “Edena!” Seraphina had gasped. “I can’t believe you said that to your brother! Where did you even hear that?”

  “Good grief, Matera! I’m almost thirty years old. I’m the last of my friends who hasn’t had a lover yet. And if that’s what concerns you, then you need to talk to your son about where he’s been planting that shorter front tail lately.”

  Growling, Hadyn had rushed at his sister, but Sera had caught him. “Stop! Both of you! And just who have you been courting, young man?”

  Before he could answer, Edena spoke for him. “Wouldn’t call it courting.”

  He’d gaped at her.

  “Hadyn? Look at me and answer my question. Why didn’t you tell me?”

  He’d lifted his chin defiantly. “It’s not a discussion a man wants to have with his mother.”

  “And it’s not his fault. They crawl all over him whenever you leave us.”

  “Is this true?”

  He’d nodded bashfully. “They say that my father had incredible stamina because he was a dragon and they want to know if I take after him.”

  Horrified, she’d stared at her son. “And you allow them to test you?”

  Unabashed, he’d grinned at her. “Every chance I get.”

  “You are so grounded. Go on and stand over there, and bleed.”

  “What?”

  “I mean it, Hadyn. Go over there before I do you more harm.”

  Pouting, he obeyed.

  She turned back to her daughter. “All right, Deenie. Your turn.”

  Edena moved back and shook her arms out to her sides. With a deep breath for courage, she changed forms and immediately smacked her head into the ceiling. “Ow!”

  “Hah!” Hadyn had teased in his deep, raspy voice. “Told you!”

  “Hush, Hadyn. Or I’ll step on you.”

  “Like to see you try.”

  Seraphina growled at them. Why did they always have to fight, all the time? It made no sense to her and she wanted to choke them both. “Kids, stop!”

  Satisfied they were quelled for a minute, she walked to Edena. “How do you feel?”

  “Hadyn was right. It’s strange. Did you feel like this the first time you changed?”

  Sera had smiled at the question. “Want to know a secret?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I’ve never shifted.”

  Both of them had gaped at her.

  “Never?” Hadyn gasped.

  “Never. My parents didn’t believe in it for Arcadians. And since I’ve never been shocked … I’ve always been human.”

  Edena had returned to being human. “Then why did you make us do this?”

  She’d brushed the hair back from her baby’s beautiful eyes that reminded her so much of Maxis’s. “Because your father was a beautiful, proud dragon. And I wanted you to share this part of him. No one should take that from you. Don’t ever let them.”

  Frowning, Hadyn had moved closer to them. “You loved our father?”

  “I did and I’m sorry I took him from you. But never be afraid of using the gift he left you with. You are drakomai. Hold your heads up in pride of that and never let anyone make you feel inferior.”

  Max pulled back out of her memory to stare at her. “You really told them that?”

  She nodded. “I meant what I said, Maxis.”

  “Then prove it.”

  “How?”

  “Turn into a dragon.”

  The color faded from her face. “Pardon?”

  Max took a deep breath before he explained his ultimatum. “You say that you want a fresh start? Then open your heart and show me that you’re willing to bend. I want you to face the beast inside you. As you made our children shift, I want you to shift. Just once. If you can embrace the dragon inside your own heart, then we might stand a chance.”

  “And if I can’t?”

  “Then I know you’re lying. If you can’t stomach the dragon that lives in your body, how could you ever accept and love the one that is inside me?”

  Seraphina knew he was right. But as she stared at him, she doubted she could do this. For too long she’d denied that beast. Had hidden it away. To bring it out now …

  What if she couldn’t go back?

  “I mean this, Sera. You gave me an impossible choice once. Now I give you one. Shift for me or lose me forever.”

  11

  “You want me to shift here?” Seraphina asked, looking around the loft that suddenly seemed way too tiny for two full-sized dragons.

  A teasing light shone in his eyes. “You’ll do it?”

  “I don’t know … I’m scared.”

  The playful light extinguished immediately. “And that’s why I’m insisting. You need to understand the beast inside you. Make peace with that part of yourself. I want you to understand the gift you unknowingly gave our dragonets.”

  Still, it terrified her. But he was right. She’d made her children do this. In all fairness, she should do it too.

  Maxis pulled back from her and rose to his feet. He held his hand out for her. “Come with me, my precious swan. Let me show you what it means to be a ferocious dragon. Trust me.”

  Against all reason and sanity, she did.

  Her hand trembling, she took his and allowed him to pull her to her feet. One moment they were in his New Orleans loft and in the next …

  “Where are we?”

  “Avalon. It’s the safest place I know to take you for this. The only place I know we can go and not be disturbed or hunted.” His gaze darkened before he gave her a chaste kiss that left her strangely breathless. “Now let yourself go.”

  She waited for him to put a little distance between them before she took a deep breath and …

  Dropping her arms to her side, she shook her head. “I can’t do this.”

  He arched a brow as he gave her a stern look and crossed his arms over his chest. “Can’t or won’t?”

  Won’t, but she wasn’t about to admit that to him. “Why is this so important to you? What does it really matter?”

  “Because you fear it and me so much. I want you to understand the beast in your heart. To see for yourself what it means to be a dragon. Just one time in your life, Sera. That’s all I ask. Appease me.”

  In all these centuries, he’d seldom asked her for anything. And as she stood there, shame filled her as she remembered those handful of times.

  Whenever she was away from home, he’d asked her to let him stay in his cave where he wasn’t ridiculed by her people, and she’d denied him that comfort. He’d asked her to not submit him to her tribe to be inspected like a caged animal.

  She’d denied him that, too.

  He’d begged her to run away with him, and start their family. To live, just the two of them, in peace. No tribe. No hatred. To start fresh and create, rather than destroy.

  And the final thing he’d wanted was for her to spare him Nala’s wrath.

  Tears filled her eyes again as she realized how unfair she’d been. How cruel. She choked on a sob.

  “Sera,” he breathed, flashing himself to her side so that he could gather her in his arms. “It’s okay. You don’t have to do this.”

  And that succeeded in making her cry like a child. She buried her face against his chest and wept as all the pain and regret poured through her. They should have had a life together. Instead, her fears and pride had divided them for centuries. Had trapped her and her children as stone statues and forced him to live in complete celibate solitude.

  Worse, they had hurt the one creature in her life who had never sought to harm her. In all her life, Maxis was the only one who had ever put her first. And in spite of everything, he still did.

  Burying her hands in his hair, she pulled his lips to
hers and kissed him. She let the taste of her dragon fill her senses as she remembered the way he’d once been. How he’d greeted her and held her. No reservations. No guile. Ever her loyal and precious mate.

  Nipping his lips, she stepped back to smile up at him. “I am your dragonswan. Show me.” With a ragged breath, she forced herself to leave the shelter of his arms and run toward the open meadow.

  Max wasn’t sure what to think. Not until he saw her spread her wings, then transform into a beautiful red dragon. Her laughter filled his ears as she ran, carefree, through the meadow.

  For about three seconds, then she stumbled and fell flat on her face.

  Concerned for her welfare, he ran after her. “Are you all right?”

  She tried to right herself and tumbled again … and again. Finally, she sat down and let out a frustrated breath of fire. “It’s not easy to stand, is it?”

  “It is for me.” He changed forms to show her. “You have to balance your weight a bit differently. Use your wings to counterbalance.”

  She tried. And failed. “Curse you for making it look so easy.”

  With a smile, he helped her to her feet and used his neck and weight to assist her … just as he’d done for his siblings when they’d been young. “Better?”

  She nodded and smiled as she finally caught her wobbly balance. Extending her yellow wings, she moved forward, then sat down again to stare at him. “You were right. It’s not so different as a dragon, is it?”

  “No.”

  “I’m still me.”

  “Did you think you’d be someone else?”

  “No, but…”

  He arched a dragon brow. “Thought you’d lose I.Q. points?”

  No, something worse. “I thought I’d be less…”

  “Human?”

  She nodded.

  “As I’ve said, it’s the human and Apollite blood that makes the Katagaria dangerous. Not the dragon. The dragon just makes them bigger.”

  And apparently top-heavy. “Can you teach me to fly?”

  “Best I teach you to hover for now. I don’t want you to harm yourself.” And so he showed her how to use her wings to lift herself from the ground.