Even When It's Wrong

by Nicole Jackson

  Her nostrils flared, as she locked eyes with me. “Come on!” she spun around, and stomped into the apartment.

  I glanced at Mya, and I could tell that she was nervous, as she bit her bottom lip. “Come on, man,” I told her softly.

  With her eyes trained on the ground, she nodded her head. Just that quickly her entire demeanor had shifted, and I hated seeing her in that state. It quickly reminded me of how Meeka’s mere presence usually killed her spirit.

  Tipping into the apartment after Mya, I closed the door. I guess she didn’t know what to do with herself, as she stood in the middle of the living room, twiddling her fingers.

  “So, tell me what the fuck is going on,” Meeka immediately went in, with her hands on her hips. “Why the fuck is my man buying you shit, Mya? Huh?!”

  Mya stood there, while her mama was directly in her face, seemingly seconds from ripping her head off.

  “Meeka, calm the fuck down,” I gritted, while yanking her away from Mya. “The fuck is you doing?”

  “I’m trying to figure out if I need to kill this big bitch!” Meeka roared, as spit flew from her mouth.

  I frowned. “Do you hear yourself?”

  “Yeah! I know exactly what the fuck I’m saying!” she pounded her chest.

  I stood there feeling nothing but disgust for her. As fucked up as my actions was, I couldn’t believe how heartless she was towards her own flesh and blood, which caused me to have absolutely no compassion for her. And I really didn’t give a fuck about how anything would make her feel.

  “Look, Meeka,” I licked my lips. “The truth is…” I started, before I was cut off.

  “Yeah, the truth is that he took me to the mall to pick out your stuff,” Mya blurted.

  I furrowed my brows, looking at her crazy, because that clearly wasn’t what I was about to say.

  Meeka narrowed her eyes. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

  “He…he took me to the mall to help pick out some stuff for you. And…and since I helped him he bought me these jeans and stuff,” Mya stuttered.

  Meeka’s eyes landed on me, I guess expecting me to elaborate. I looked at Mya, and her eyes were practically pleading with me. Begging.

  I took a deep breath. “Yeah. She was helping me get some stuff for you. You know I been telling you that I was gonna look out for you when my money was right. Well, the time is now, and she was just looking out for me. So, I bought her a few items. That’s it.”

  “A few items?” Meeka folded her arms across her chest. “It’s looks like more than a fucking few items to me. This hoe looks primped from her head to her feet. Wearing them tight ass jeans, all up in her ass.”

  “Mama, Nisha did my hair, and I used the money my granny gave me to get my feet done,” Mya explained. “Omari just bought me these jeans. That’s it. Let me show you what he got for you.” She jogged to her room, before Meeka could object.

  I stood, waiting to see what Mya would bring out of her room. I smirked when she brought out some shit she’d picked out, but I really didn’t want her to have. I just didn’t like the style of the Michael Kors shoes or bag, but she’d insisted on getting it.

  Watching the expression on Meeka’s face gradually change, I knew that she was pleased with what Mya presented. “I been wanting this bag!” she squealed, as she rudely snatched the purse, and shoe box out of Mya’s hands. “Yasssss!”

  Mya stood by, still looking nervous. She gave me a quick glance, before she came with more bullshit. “Mama, and Omari said that he was going to give you some money to get you some more stuff.”

  I narrowed my eyes, letting her know that she was taking shit a little too far. She arched her brows, urging me to play along. “Uh, yeah,” I cleared my throat. “That’s what I was about to do before you came in on all this bullshit. It was supposed to be a surprise once you got off work.” I dug in my pocket, and pulled out my knot. Meeka’s eyes danced with excitement. She watched intensely, as I peeled back five bills. “Here, man.” I shoved the cash in her hands.

  “Hehehe, that’s what I’m talking about,” she boasted. “You finally got some act right in you.” She folded the money, before stuffing it into her bra. “I was telling Glenda’s ass that she couldn’t compare me and her situation. Just because Kells left her high and dry didn’t mean that you’d do me like that. I keep telling those hoes that we aint cut from the same cloth.”

  Mya rolled her eyes behind her back.

  “Yeah, you know what it is. I got you.” I rubbed my hands together, deciding to get fully into character. “Fuck what a hater got to say.”

  “Exactly!” Meeka proclaimed, before placing Mya’s re-gifted purse and shoes on the couch. “And I will be letting them know,” she announced, before approaching me, and wrapping her arms around me.

  Reluctantly, I wrapped my arms around her, while staring at Mya. She pursed her lips, while patting her hair. I knew right then that she was uncomfortable with us embracing. Unflinchingly, she stood there, until a lone tear slipped from her eye. She quickly wiped it away, as Meeka finally released me.

  “Thank you, bae,” Meeka kissed my lips. “And I’m sorry for tripping out on you,” she apologized.

  I backed up. “What about your daughter? Are you gonna apologize to her?”

  Meeka glanced back at Mya. “She know what it is. And I’m still mad. You know that we established that big girls don’t need to wear nothing tight.” She focused on me again. “And she had no business accepting anything from you. She aint your responsibility. She know that.”

  “Man,” I drawled.

  “Yeah, but anyway,” Meeka perked up. “Since you got it like that, can I get five more to pay the light bill?” she held her hand out.

  For a few long seconds, I stared at her hand, wanting to slap that bitch away. But I could feel Mya’s eyes burning a hole in the side of my head. Thinking that she owed me big time, I gave in. “Alright, man.” I peeled back five additional bills. “But don’t get used to this shit.”

  Chapter 13

  Mya

  “Girl, if you don’t slow this muthafucka down!” Omari commanded.

  I giggled, as I gripped the steering wheel. “I am. Calm down.”

  “You keep saying that, but your foot is still on the gas.”

  “But I got this,” I told him, as I focused on the road.

  “Alright, keep playing, and you gon pull this bitch over,” he grumbled.

  I tried my best not to laugh, because I knew that it would piss him off. Every day after he’d pick me up from school I’d convince him to let me drive, and he’d complain a majority of the time. But the next day, he’d go right back to letting me drive again. Usually, I’d take heed when he’d threaten to make me pull over, but I was too excited this time. It was the last day of school, and summer time was here!

  “Omari, pull ya damn panties out ya ass,” I kidded, shimmying in my seat.

  “Alright,” he nodded, before grabbing the wheel, causing me to swerve.

  “Stop!” I belted.

  “Well, act like you got some fucking sense. Before I show yo ass what it really means to be a damn fool.”

  I shook my head. “You ignorant. Gon fuck that girl’s name all the way up, if I wreck her shit.”

  He cut his eyes at me. “Stop playing with me. I pay for this shit, so she is irrelevant.”

  “Umm hmm,” I pursed my lips together. “Tell me anything.”

  Just as I knew he would, he increased the volume on the music. It had been a few days since I’d popped that hoe in the face, and he now avoided talking about her. But that hadn’t stopped me from bringing her up. Clearly, he’d fucked her, so I wasn’t letting go of the situation. Especially since she still called him every ten minutes. And since I didn’t like her, I was silently hoping that she’d catch another glimpse of me riding in her rental.

  “Damn, I need a nap,” Omari yawned.

  I knew that he’d been up all night hustling, and hadn’t been to sleep ye
t. So, although it was just eight that evening we were headed in. Meeka was gone to work, so as usual we’d have the crib to ourselves. Still, unlike him, I wasn’t ready to go sit in the house, and would’ve been more than happy to bend a few corners.

  As I pulled into the complex, I swear that my enthusiasm dwindled. Being back at home often brought me back to reality in a fucked-up kind of way. I parked the Lexus, and eased out, while slurping on the lemonade I’d gotten from Chick-fil-a. Omari sluggishly followed suit, as we marched up the sidewalk. I sighed quietly, as I used my key to unlock the front door.

  “The fuck?” I grumbled, as I stepped into our unusually hot and dark apartment. “Where’s the lights?” I flicked on the nearest light switch only to find that nothing happened.

  “Man,” Omari stressed. “I know that broad aint take my money, and still didn’t pay the fucking bill.” He whipped out his cell. “She got me fucked up.” He called her on speaker phone.

  “Hello,” Meeka answered almost immediately.

  “Ay, where you at?” he questioned.

  “Me, and Glenda called off, and rode out here to the casino.”

  “You called off? Why you aint say nothing?”

  “Since when do you care?” she laughed, sounding like she was enjoying the fact that he seemingly cared enough to question her. “But no, it was a last-minute decision. I’ll be back soon.”

  “So, let me get this right. You called off from work to go gambling? You aint make sure that shit was straight at your house or nothing?”

  “Shit straight like what, Omari?” she practically whined, which sounded quite pathetic, considering her age.

  “Shit like your daughter, man. Amongst other shit.”

  “Well, I’m sure that Mya will catch the bus to her granny’s. So, what else?”

  I frowned, questioning how much did she even give a fuck about me. To her knowledge, I didn’t even have a phone, but I was somehow supposed to come home, find somebody’s phone to use, and then find a way to my granny’s? The fuck? I mean, damn, at least at one point she provided me with bus fair to get to my granny’s, but now she didn’t even leave that.

  “What about the fucking lights?” Omari snapped.

  “Huh?” Meeka sounded dumbfounded.

  “You heard me. All that bitching you been doing about a nigga not helping you, and look at the shit you do. I finally give you some money to pay a bill, and you don’t even fucking pay it!”

  “Boy, I did pay it,” she lied so smoothly.

  “So, why the lights off, Meeka? Huh?”

  “The lights off?” she asked, pretending to be surprised. “You bullshitting?”

  “Man, stop playing with me. You know damn well that you aint pay them people.”

  “Oh, fuck!” she shouted. “That’s what I forgot to do the other day. Shit! Baby, I still got the money. I’ll pay it as soon as I get home.”

  “And when might that be?”

  “Either tomorrow or Sunday. But the fucked up part about it is that Center Pointe won’t be able to turn them back on until Monday morning.”

  “Monday, huh? I got you. Let’s see if I’m still living here by then, since you on some fuck shit.” He abruptly ended the call.

  “This shit is crazy,” I mumbled, as I held my forehead. It was truly sad to have a mama like mine.

  “Come on, man, let’s go,” Omari ordered, as he traveled back outside.

  “Okay, let me change first,” I murmured, before using my cell to guide me threw the dark apartment. Using the little light from the sunset, coming through my blinds, I found a red fitted Bebe dress. After probing through my closet, I also found some gold Bebe gladiator scandals. Rushing, I changed clothes, before heading out the door. I stopped to lock the door, as Omari stood, waiting. We then trotted back to the truck. For a second I stopped to notice how everyone around us was bustling about, seemingly getting out on a Friday evening. I realized that I never did much on Fridays, beyond laying up with Omari.

  “Mya!” someone shouted my name.

  Whirling around, I saw Nisha jogging through the lot. “Where you going?” she questioned as she approached me.

  “Nowhere, really. Why?” I asked.

  She briefly glanced at Omari, who stood on the sidewalk. “Come here.” She pulled me out of his earshot. “Bitch, it’s a big ass party going down tonight. Tee from school is throwing a end of the year bash, and everybody’s gonna be there. I already got a ride. Come with me.”

  That sounded so appealing, but before I could respond Omari cut in. “Come here, Mya.”

  “Hold up.” I threw a hand up.

  “Nah, come here now,” he demanded seriously.

  I sucked my teeth, before spinning around. “What?”

  “I said, come here,” he reiterated.

  “Ugh,” I vented, before stomping over to him. “Yeah?”

  “What you and that lil’ hoe talking about?”

  I narrowed my eyes. “Why?”

  He gritted. “Cause I asked.”

  I sucked my teeth again. “She was telling me about a party.”

  “A party?” he frowned. “That hoe on one.” He gripped his sagging jeans, as he stepped over to the driver’s side of the Lexus. “Come on, let’s go.” He opened the door.

  “Mya, you coming?” Nisha attempted to whisper.

  “Nah, she aint coming,” Omari spoke up for me. “Get in the truck, Mya.”

  I stood for a second, considering cussing him out. He wasn’t my daddy.

  “Mya, come on!”

  “He get on my fucking nerves,” I huffed, before I got into the truck.

  “Really, Mya? You really gon let this nigga tell you what to do?” Nisha folded her arms across her chest.

  “Say, if you don’t get yo banana peel head ass away from my truck. Go’on ‘bout your fucking business. You aint no friend of hers, and the quicker she realizes that the better off she’ll be. Get the fuck, like you did the day when she fought three bitches by herself.”

  “Nigga, I wasn’t there, so fuck what you talking about,” she twisted her neck.

  “And I’m sure you’ll find another way to not be there if some more shit pops off.”

  “Whatever.” She rolled her eyes, not having much else to say. “I see how it is with you now, Mya. Hoes start fucking their mama’s man, and don’t know how to act.”

  Omari whipped his head around, and bucked his eyes. “You hear this bullshit? That’s exactly why I tell you to stay away from hoes like her.”

  “I heard her,” I mumbled, before sliding out of the SUV. Casually, I twisted over to the driver’s side. “I’m driving.”

  Thankfully, he didn’t protest. Nisha stood watching, as I eased under the wheel of the Lexus once again. “I guess bitches get salty when they been sucking all the wrong dicks, and still find their selves walking.”

  “And fuck you too,” she scoffed, before sauntering off.

  “Somebody need to whup her ugly ass,” Omari griped. “I can’t believe you was even thinking about going somewhere with that hoe.”

  I cut my eyes at him. “Why exactly are you so worried about me hanging with her?”

  “Cause,” he scowled. “I see through her, and know what she about.”

  “And what do you see?”

  He sighed. “I see a lil’ hating ass hoe who don’t mean you no good. And you know that, but you was still standing there like you was about to run off with her ass.”

  “Because,” I uttered.

  He furrowed his brows. “Because what?”

  “Because I wanted to go the party she was talking about. What’s so bad about that?”

  “With her?”

  “Going with her was really irrelevant. But I did like the idea of going somewhere. It’s boring around here, and I never get to do stuff like that.”

  He nodded. “I hear you.”

  I watched as he texted on his phone, while wondering who he was communicating with. Before I could get too nosy, he g
lanced my way. “What you waiting for? Let’s go.”

  “Okay,” I sighed, figuring that he was going to guide me the nearest motel.

  “It’s too quiet in here,” he mumbled, as he increased the volume on the stereo.

  “When you wake up before you brush your teeth, you grab the strap, nigga. Only time you get down on your knees is shooting craps, nigga. God blessing all the trap niggas,” Future floated from the speakers.

  With the sunroof open, and the windows down, there was a nice breeze coming through. The sun hadn’t quite gone down, which gave everything this weird illuminating appeal. The street lights were already on, and the streets were busy, setting the stage for what seemed like a fun night…for everybody else. For a second I pretended that I was a worldlier girl, headed to turn up with my friends.

  “Drive to 610,” Omari instructed, which threw me off.

  “Where are we going?”

  He quickly glanced at me. “Just drive, or do you want me to? You comfortable with driving on the freeway?”

  “Yeah. I can handle it,” I spoke confidently.

  “Alright, well, hop on 610.”

  I did just as he’d told me, never going over the speed limit. Every so often, he’d give further instructions, and eventually we pulled up to a Dave and Buster’s. By the time I parked, he was on the phone.

  “Ay, we here,” he told somebody. “Where yall at?”

  Whoever was on the other end of the phone, said something, before Omari ended the call. He then focused on me. “You down to bowl, huh?”

  “Bowl?” I arched my brows. “I mean, I guess. I’ve never done it before, but I learn fast.”

  “Alright, let’s go, then.”

  “Okay, but,” I tucked my lips into my mouth. “They…they…nobody in there knows that you live with my mama, do they?”

  He sucked his teeth. “Nah, man. The only person who really even knows Meeka is Kells, and he aint gon say shit.”

  “Okay,” I sighed. “Let’s go.” I opened my door.

  It wasn’t until that very moment that I realized that everything me and Omari shared had been in seclusion, before this. The most we’d done publicly was eat together, which could easily be explained away. So, this was a first, and the thought of people looking at me crazy because I was with my mama’s boyfriend really bothered me. Because honestly, I’d look at the next chick funny if I’d see them doing anything inappropriate with their mama’s boyfriend.