by Carol Lynne
Lu waited until Baz had returned and refilled his glass before speaking. “Do you love him?”
“Who?” Baz asked, still in the grip of his past.
“Nick. Who else would I be talking about?”
Baz blinked several times, bringing himself back to the moment. “Doesn’t matter. I don’t know that I trust him.”
“You talk a lot about trust for someone who betrayed mine under the guise of being for my own good,” Lu reminded Baz.
Baz felt dutifully punched in the face. “You know I was under Michael’s orders to do what I did.”
“Does it matter? I forgave you. Why can’t you give Nick the same chance?”
“I don’t know if we can work things out. A lot has happened since we were together,” he admitted.
“So go out with him and see if you can rebuild your relationship.”
Baz shook his head. “You don’t know Nick. If I give an inch, he’ll try to take a mile. One date and he’ll assume we’re back together. I’m not like that. It takes a long time for me to trust someone. There was a time when I trusted him to always be there for me, and not only did Nick throw it back in my face, but he threatened me.”
Lu chuckled. “He said nearly the same thing about you. He told me you broke his heart.”
Lu finished his wine and carried his glass into the kitchen, leaving Baz dumfounded.
“Are you taking his side?” Baz asked.
“No. I’m simply trying to force the issue. You need to figure out what it is you want, because I have a strong feeling you’re about to lose him for good.” Lu walked toward the door without saying anything else.
“Wait a minute. You can’t say something like that and just walk away.”
Lu turned around and leaned against the door, crossing his arms in the process. “It was a straight forward statement. What else do you need to know, Baz?”
“I need to know why you said that. Do you know something about Nick that I don’t?”
Lu held up his hand and began ticking things off on his fingers. “He’s lonely, he’s horny, and he has several men at the club who are dying to take your place. Nick may love you, but he won’t have it shoved back in his face indefinitely.”
When Lu turned to leave, Baz held his tongue. Between Galen and Nick, love had been nothing but heartache. Why would he willingly put himself in that position again?
* * * *
By the time the soft knock sounded on the door, Nick was half-drunk. He hoisted himself off the couch and greeted Cory with a smile. “Glad you came.”
Cory stepped inside the apartment and glanced around. “This is nice.”
Nick nodded. He didn’t give a flying fuck about small talk. He grabbed Cory’s hand and led the sexy man toward the sofa.
Cory started to sit down, but Nick shook his head and pulled the sprite into his lap. “Kiss me.”
Cory moved to straddle Nick’s legs.
Nick moaned as he felt the press of Cory’s ass against his cock. He closed his eyes as Cory’s tongue began to explore his mouth. When Cory began squirming on Nick’s lap, Nick’s hands automatically went to the man’s butt.
As good as Cory’s ass felt in his hands, Nick couldn’t help but compare it to Baz’s. Shit. He had to stop thinking about Baz.
Cory broke the kiss and stared at Nick as he pushed his hand under the waistband of Nick’s sweats. Nick moaned as Cory’s hand wrapped around his cock.
“Why tonight?” Cory asked.
Lying wasn’t in Nick’s nature. He especially couldn’t deceive someone as sweet as Cory. “It took me a couple hundred years, but I finally figured out I was wasting my time mooning over Baz.” Nick watched Cory carefully. “I’m sorry. I hope that doesn’t hurt your feelings.”
Cory continued stroking Nick’s cock. “Doesn’t. As long as it’s the truth.”
Nick pulled Cory into another deep kiss. He pressed his fingers against the seam of Cory’s tight jeans and reveled in Cory’s answering moan.
The ringing phone was a rude intruder in their passionate play. Nick broke the kiss. Because of the late hour, he knew it had to be some kind of emergency. The first thought through his head was Baz.
Nick wrapped an arm around Cory’s waist for support and leaned forward to grab his phone from the coffee table. “Hello?”
“I’m outside. Can you let me in? I need to talk to you.”
Nick glanced at Cory. Was throwing away what he could have with Cory worth talking to Baz? He hadn’t lied to the man in his arms about trying to move on.
“I’m kinda busy at the moment. What do we need to talk about?” he finally asked.
“Please, Nick. Just let me come up,” Baz begged.
Nick’s face must have shown his confusion at the plea because Cory slid off his lap onto the couch. Nick saw the hurt in Cory’s eyes, but the smaller man tried to give Nick a reassuring smile.
“Give me five minutes.” Nick hung up the phone. “I’m sorry.”
Cory stood and started for the door. “So am I.”
Nick tucked his erection back into his sweats as best as he could and followed Cory out the door and down the steps.
“If things…” Nick began.
Cory turned around and covered Nick’s mouth with his hand. “If Baz has come to you, it means he’s finally figured out what he had. He’s a good guy. The two of you deserve to find happiness again.”
Nick placed a kiss on the hand still covering his mouth before pulling it away. “Thank you for making this easier for me. I’m not sure if I would be so kind if our positions were reversed.”
Cory chuckled. “I’m a sucker for a good romance, what more can I say?”
They reached the door and Nick unlocked it.
Baz’s gaze went from him to Cory and back again. “Am I interrupting?”
Cory shook his head. “Nope. I was just leaving.”
Nick was grateful Cory was such a nice guy. It could’ve been an ugly scene otherwise.
“See you tomorrow,” Nick said as Cory walked toward the bicycle chained to the lamppost.
Nick stepped back out of the doorway. “Come in.”
Baz strode by Nick, his eyes on the erection still visible in Nick’s sweats. “I did interrupt, didn’t I?”
Nick shrugged. He didn’t owe Baz an explanation. He led the way upstairs to his apartment. Once inside, he made himself sit casually on the couch.
“What did you want to talk about?” he asked.
Baz seemed to study the apartment for several moments before eventually answering. “Now that I’m here, I’m not sure.”
Games. Nick crossed his arms over his naked chest. “Take a guess.”
“You have something going on with Cory?” Baz asked.
“Not yet. But that’s really none of your business.” Nick knew he sounded cold, but he wasn’t the one who’d openly welcomed a public blowjob the previous evening.
“Don’t. Please.” Baz whispered, looking down at the hands in his lap.
“Don’t what?” Nick asked.
“Don’t start something with Cory.”
“Why? Are you saying you’re ready to get off your high horse and talk to me?”
Baz stood and headed for the door. “This is stupid. I don’t even know why I bothered to come.”
Nick jumped up and beat Baz to it, blocking the only exit. “No you don’t. For months I’ve put my heart on the line and you’ve ignored me. Forgive me if I seem a little skeptical. Why now? What’s different?”
Baz broke eye contact. “I guess I…”
Baz stopped and took several deep breaths. “I guess I always counted on you being there once I forgave you.”
Nick wanted to scream in frustration. “You left me! Not the other way around. I’m the one who forgave you and followed your ass to Hell.”
Baz started to say something, but snapped his mouth shut and tried to push Nick out of the way.
No fucking way was Nick going to let Baz just walk
out on him again. He wrapped the man he loved in his arms and reversed their positions. With Baz’s back against the door, Nick grabbed a handful of hair and kissed the stubborn sonofabitch.
Nick’s tongue continued to lick the seam of Baz’s mouth until the man in his arms finally relented and opened for it. Within seconds, the kiss became a feral mating of two desperately horny men.
Baz pushed his chest against Nick’s, fighting for the upper hand. It had been too long for Nick and he’d been too desperate to feel Baz in his arms to allow the man an inch. He pushed back with everything he had as his hands roamed Baz’s body.
Baz bit down on Nick’s lip hard enough to draw blood. Nick jerked his head back and stared into the dark eyes in front of him.
“What the fuck was that for?” Nick asked, soothing the cut with his tongue.
Baz reached between them and cupped Nick’s deflated cock. “Just making sure the next time this gets hard, it’s for me.”
The possessive statement had Nick hardening immediately. “No worries there.”
Baz rubbed his hand up and down Nick’s expanding length. “I can’t just fall back into a relationship, but, damn, do I want this cock buried inside of me.”
“You mean the strings you were talking about earlier?” Nick surmised.
“Yes. I’m not ready to hear your declarations of love every time I turn around.” Baz released Nick’s cock, obviously waiting for Nick to say something.
Nick couldn’t separate the two, at least not with Baz. So the question was, could he keep his mouth shut? He’d known in his heart it was the reason Baz had left him in the first place. Yes, Baz needed to right the wrong, but he’d only made the decision after Nick had declared his undying love. It seemed Baz couldn’t get out of Heaven fast enough. It was still something Nick struggled to understand. Baz may be able to fool himself, but Nick knew Baz loved him.
“I’ll try,” he conceded. Even without the words, Nick hoped Baz would know how he felt every time he made love to him. As he led Baz toward his bedroom, Nick prayed he wasn’t making a mistake. As much as he wanted Baz, Nick knew his heart wouldn’t survive if it didn’t work out.
* * * *
As Baz began to undress, he tried to calm the butterflies in his stomach. It was Nick. How many thousands of times had the two of them fucked? There was absolutely no reason for him to get nervous, never mind that it had been close to two hundred and sixty years since they’d last been intimate.
“Those are new. I like ’em,” Nick said, gesturing to Baz’s nipple rings.
“Lu’s idea.” As soon as he’d said it, Baz wished he could take it back. He knew Nick resented Lu more than he let on. Baz watched as the muscle in Nick’s jaw jumped several times. Yep. The remark had affected Nick more than he was willing to say.
Baz quickly pushed his pants down in an attempt to distract Nick. He crawled to the center of the bed and stared at Nick.
“How do you want me?” he asked.
“Any way I can get you,” Nick answered. He opened the bedside drawer and removed a bottle of lube, tossing it beside Baz.
“You still like to watch.” Baz shouldn’t have been surprised. Nick had always enjoyed watching Baz stretch himself. It was the opposite for Baz. He preferred a more hands-on approach when preparing Nick’s hole.
Baz rolled to his back and bent his knees until his feet were firmly planted on the mattress. He grabbed the lube and poured a generous amount in his hand. It had been several months since he’d been stretched, and Nick’s thick cock required more than most.
Nick carried a chair from the side of the room to the foot of the bed. He took a seat and waited.
Baz grinned. It didn’t seem to matter how long they’d been apart. Some things never changed. With his legs spread, Nick wrapped his fingers around the root of his cock and slowly ran his hand from base to crown as he watched Baz sink a finger into his hole. The hungry expression on Nick’s handsome face had always been a turn-on for Baz.
“You like that?” Baz asked, pushing a second finger inside.
Nick replied with a grunt, his eyes zeroing in on Baz’s ass.
Although Baz had swapped places with Lu over the years, the only other man he’d allowed to top him was Nick. His mind started to wander to Galen, but Baz quickly pushed that thought away.
“I’m ready,” he told Nick.
Nick licked the pre-cum from his palm before crawling onto the bed. Baz started to turn over, but Nick stopped him with a hand on his hip.
“Stay right there,” Nick ordered. He positioned himself over Baz, bracing himself with his arms.
Baz was forced to close his eyes against the intensity of Nick’s gaze.
“Look at me,” Nick whispered against Baz’s lips. Nick wasn’t playing fair, and it was obvious by his lopsided grin that he knew it.
“I thought you were going to fuck me,” Baz said.
“It’s been a long time. I need to get reacquainted with all my favorite spots.”
Baz was grateful when Nick started to kiss and lick his way down his neck. At least he no longer had to school his emotions. Free to feel, Baz closed his eyes and gave himself over to Nick’s tender touch. His lover had always known how to take him to another level of pleasure.
Nothing compared to the way Nick made love. As Nick began teasing Baz’s nipples, it all started to come back to him. The hours of lying in bed doing nothing more than touching and tasting each other’s skin.
After Nick, Baz hadn’t allowed another lover that level of intimacy. But now, as Baz lifted his arms over his head, he prayed Nick would take it all, everything he had left to give. Unlike Nick, Baz had the ability to separate love from sex. He’d become a master at pleasuring his body while keeping his heart intact. Losing hurt too much when you allowed yourself to love. You can have my body, but not my soul, Nick Ramsey.
Baz moaned as Nick swallowed his cock to the root. He gripped the bed sheets in an attempt to keep his climax at bay. Not yet. He wanted the cock he dreamt about for over two hundred years inside him when he came.
“Please,” he groaned as Nick thrust three fingers inside of him.
Nick released Baz’s cock and reached for the bottle of lube. Sitting back on his heels, Nick slicked his length before positioning Baz’s legs over his shoulder.
“Keep your eyes open. See me.”
Baz started to panic. He pressed his hands against Nick’s chest just as his hole was breeched. At the slow invasion, Baz’s body began to war with his mind. It no longer seemed to matter what he thought was best, his body was sucking Nick’s cock in like it belonged there. And maybe it did, because the sense of peace that immediately filled his body was unbelievable.
Baz felt his eyes sting as Nick began a slow rhythm in and out. Baz silently cursed himself as he felt a tear slip free and run down the side of his face.
“Am I hurting you?” Nick asked.
“No.” Yes. More than you’ll ever know.
“It’s been too long since I’ve been inside you,” Nick said, picking up speed.
Baz wanted to scream that it was Nick’s fault, but he was no longer sure who to blame for their breakup. It was the reason he’d decided to offer his body to the man who had once been his everything.
“You’re still the sexiest man I’ve ever known,” Nick panted as he fucked Baz hard and deep.
Baz reached between them and wrapped his hand around his cock, jerking himself in time with Nick’s thrusts. He briefly wondered how many times they’d take each other before the night was over.
Nick’s hips jerked as his handsome face contorted in a mask of unbridled pleasure, signaling his climax. “Yessss!”
“Nick!” Baz howled as he painted his chest with his seed.
Nick carefully untangled Baz’s legs from his shoulders before lowering himself to lie on top of him.
As they both struggled to get their breathing under control, Baz silently hoped Nick wouldn’t break his word. Don’t say it. Don�
��t say it.
“That was fantastic,” Nick eventually whispered in Baz’s ear.
Baz breathed a sigh of relief. “Yes. It was.”
Chapter Four
Lu came bustling into the library like his pants were on fire. “Okay, I procured a meeting with Bruga for tonight at Ice Water.”
Baz scanned the room to make sure no one was within earshot. “Bruga the Hidden?”
Lu nodded. “He’s the only man I know that’s lived on both sides of the wall. I’m just lucky he likes me.”
Lu was definitely fishing for a compliment, so Baz did his duty. “Of course he likes you. Who else would let him paint an entire building black so he could forever hide in the shadows?”
It was obvious by the pleased expression on Lu’s gorgeous face he’d been properly petted.
“So why is Bruga willing to meet us at Ice Water? I thought he hated people.” Baz gently closed the ancient book he’d been poring over.
“He does, but he likes whiskey, and I’ve promised him a case of single malt if he meets us there before the club opens.” Lu rolled his eyes. “Dominic insisted we meet there or not at all.”
“I’m supposed to have dinner with Nick,” Baz informed Lu. He held his breath waiting for Lu’s reaction to the statement.
“You’ll just have to make it an early dinner. Bruga will be there at seven.”
“That’s it?” Baz asked, shocked.
“What’s it?”
“You’re not going to make a big deal out of me going to dinner with Nick?”
Lu shook his head. “You put enough pressure on people. My two cents would only muddle the pot.”
Baz stared at his best friend. “Do I really do that? Put pressure on people?”
Lu leaned across the desk and placed a soft kiss on Baz’s forehead. “Sometimes. I don’t think you mean to, but you hold people to the high standards in which you were raised. If someone doesn’t understand or agree, you’re quick to criticize.”
