Everlasting Hope

by Annie Boone

  Something about the way he said it made her stop. Texas these days was full of folk from all over, but few had such a pronounced accent. It was altogether slow and luxurious all at once. She felt like she could listen to him talk all day long even though every word confused her poor body and mind more and more.

  “Where are you from then, Mr. Rigsby?” she asked, seeking to find a secure footing in the conversation–if such a thing were to be had.

  “No, ma’am. Georgia born and bred,” he said proudly. “Folks had a bit of a farm out that way, but the war destroyed that, too.” The bitterness had crept back in.

  “And you came here to start again?” Ellie asked, wanting somehow to get him to smile, to look to the future with hope rather than to the past with despair.

  “Something like that,” Mr. Rigsby said. He didn’t look too sure of it, and there was definitely an air of defeat around him. His tone said he’d given up on life before it had even started for him.

  “Well, I’m sure you’ll find Springville to be very welcoming,” she said nervously, wishing her father would hurry up so they might leave and go on to Byron Creek.

  Jude Rigsby was altogether a little too intense and a lot too good looking. She didn’t know if she wanted him to kiss her, or if she’d prefer it if she never saw him again. But she certainly couldn’t deny that he had most definitely left an impression upon her.

  Chapter Four

  Jude made his way up the hill towards Nate and Mae Ellison’s place. Caesar, his mount, took the hill at a steady pace, his strong muscles bunching under Jude’s thighs. The Ellisons had been kind enough to invite him to lunch, and though he sometimes wished he could say no to his old friend, he knew he needed to spend time with people who cared about him.

  Solitude wasn’t good for him. Life was becoming increasingly lonely and his encounter this morning with the preacher’s daughter had shown him just how much he had forgotten when it came to making polite conversation. He was sure she must think him an absolute fool, or worse. He sighed, certain he hadn’t made the kind of good impression he’d wanted to make.

  He’d first seen Ellie Fletcher sitting in her father’s gig, as they drove into town on the very first Sunday he’d come to Springville. She’d looked so pretty, in her cotton gown. It had been a floral pattern, and the colors had highlighted the flush in her cheeks and the almost violet blue of her eyes. Even from a distance, and shaded by that wide-brimmed hat, her eyes had demanded his attention, deep pools framed by long, thick lashes.

  As she’d gotten out of the gig, the hat had fallen off her head, revealing her neatly pinned blonde hair. He’d found himself wondering if it was curly or straight, and what it might feel like to touch it, to have it brush against his skin. He’d had to take a couple of deep breaths and almost physically shake himself to try to regain any semblance of his usual composure just thinking of such a thing.

  The hat had fallen to the ground, and Jude had laughed to see how many of the town’s men-folk had rushed to rescue it from the dusty street. She had been gracious and kind in accepting its return, and she had smiled. That smile had branded itself into his mind, and he’d often thought of her as he raised his little shack up on the ridge, and went about his chores. He found all manner of reasons to go into town on a Sunday to see if he might see her though he couldn’t bring himself to actually attend services.

  This morning had been the very first moment he’d seen Ellie alone. She was always surrounded by children, or their families. He’d plucked up every ounce of courage he possessed to approach her. He rather wished that he hadn’t, now. He’d made a fool of himself, and now he was sure she must think him the most dreadfully negative and unpleasant sort. He couldn’t remember if he had even managed to crack a smile once.

  “Well, look who finally made it up here to join us?” Nate said happily as Jude entered their yard. He took hold of Caesar’s bridle and waited patiently as Jude dismounted. “I guess I lose my bet with Mae this week.”

  “You have a bet on whether I’ll show up or not?” Jude asked, slightly incredulously, shaking his friend’s hand before unbuckling Caesar’s saddle and lifting it from his back.

  Nate slipped the horse’s bridle off and opened the gate to the paddock, so the bay stallion could roam free and munch on the grass to his heart’s content.

  “We do, and so far you’ve made me the sum of four pennies,” Nate said, slapping Jude on the back as he ushered him inside the small ranch house. Jude chuckled. Such small stakes, but he couldn’t help feeling bad that he was costing Mae a thing. Her optimism that he could be redeemed deserved to be rewarded, and he vowed to make the effort to come out more often.

  Mae Ellison stood at the stove in the kitchen, her slight frame belying the strength and resilience of her character. She turned as the two men entered her domain. “Well, I am glad to see you. Especially since Nate killed one of the chickens this morning for our lunch. She’d stopped laying.”

  “I am right glad I came then. I love roast chicken,” Jude said, moving to kiss Mae on the cheek.

  He was a little jealous of Nate’s luck. Mae was pretty and pert, and didn’t take any nonsense from anyone, but she was full of love, even for a fool like him. Jude was sure that Mae was a large part of the reason Nate had managed to seem to get past the experiences the pair had shared during their time in the Confederate army.

  “Then sit yourself down, and I’ll have it on the table in twenty minutes,” Mae said, grabbing at his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. “How are things going up on the ridge?”

  “Well, I have a roof and four walls. There’s not much else to tell at this stage, but it’s enough for me. In truth, I wanted to speak with you, Nate, about an idea I had.”

  Nate raised his eyebrows and nodded. “I’m all ears, my man.”

  Chapter Five

  Nate sat at the head of the table. Jude took the seat to his left. Nate leaned back in his chair, expectantly and Jude took a deep breath.

  “I’ve been seeing that there’s a lot of movement up past my place, mainly ranchers moving their herds. The cattle drive trails edge around my property and sometimes they stop for a rest just on the border. There’s nothing much for miles near me, you know that. I thought it might be prudent to offer shelter to the cowboys overnight, provisions and so forth. What do you think?”

  “It’s a good idea, and I think it will likely bring you your fortune, and fast,” Nate admitted. “In no time your little shack would be the grandest place for miles around.” He chuckled, and Jude did, too. He had no need of luxuries and comfort. Though he couldn’t deny that if he were ever lucky enough to find a bride, she might want a little more than a cot bed and a rocking chair out under the stars.

  “Would you join me in it?” he asked Nate. “I have to confess, I’m worried about going it alone. I’d like your advice and support.”

  “Which you will always have as my friend. You’re closer to me than a brother, so you don’t need fear losing that. But, I have my hands full with my own herd. There’s never enough time in the day to get everything done that needs doing. I’d not promise you my help when I know I cannot give it,” Nate said with a smile. “And, besides, you don’t need to share such an idea with me. Whatever it is you think you owe me, you don’t.”

  Jude winced a little, at Nate’s generous compliments and his dismissal of the debt Jude felt he owed to his friend. If not for Nate, Jude was certain he would not be sitting here. The man had selflessly carried Jude from the battlefield, ignoring the risks to his own life. Jude would never be able to repay him, no matter what he said about there being no debt owed.

  Mae handed him a plate of freshly baked bread. He put it on the table, and took a slice, buttered it and then took a bite. It was still warm, and was light and soft, with a crisp crust. The butter was slightly salted, and the combination was like heaven to a man who hadn’t eaten fresh food in far too long. He was no cook and his skills went as far as putting a pot of beans on the
fire.

  “Mae, I may have to beg you to teach me everything you know about the kitchen,” he said with a smile.

  She grinned back at him. “You only need ask, begging is most definitely not required. I’d be glad to know that you are feeding yourself properly up there. It’s too lonely a place for a single man.”

  “I am rapidly learning that,” Jude agreed, though secretly he rather enjoyed the solitude of his remote home.

  “And if you mean to offer tired and hungry men shelter, being able to offer them an edible meal seems only right,” Mae added. She was probably right though both Nate, and he knew that a hungry man didn’t care about whether the food was good. He only cared that it was hot and filling. If it could impart some kind of nourishment, then all would be well for the moment.

  The lunch was a merry affair, and Jude was surprised to find himself reluctant to leave the warmth of the cozy kitchen as the skies began to darken and dusk fell. He stood and stretched his long limbs. “Thank you, for the best meal I have eaten in quite a while,” he said, kissing Mae’s cheek.

  “Stop by in the mornings after ten if you want me to teach you how to cook,” she said. Jude had been joking, but she meant it. He might even take her up on it. It would be good to eat this well every day.

  “I just might do that,” Jude assured her. “Though I may just move in, so you can cook for me,” he teased. She swatted him gently on the chest.

  “You’d be most welcome and there is more than enough room,” she said, a sad look passing over her pretty face momentarily, and Jude wondered if there was something troubling them that they hadn’t told him about.

  Though the little ranch house was barely two rooms downstairs and up, Nate had once talked all about the big plans he had to add to it, to make it a real home for a big family. But as time had gone on, those plans never seemed to materialize and were talked of less frequently. The couple had been married for more than five years now and seemed to be as in love as they’d ever been. That there were no babies yet seemed odd, especially as Mae had more than enough love to share around an entire troop of them.

  But, if they did not want to talk of it, it was none of his business. “I’d best be going, before it gets so dark I can’t see my hand in front of my face,” he said, giving Mae a quick hug, before walking out of the door.

  Chapter Six

  Nate walked him out to the paddock, and Jude whistled to Caesar. The stallion nickered a greeting and trotted to the gate. Jude lifted his saddle from the fence and entered the paddock. Caesar waited patiently as Jude fastened the buckles and adjusted his stirrups. Nate handed Jude the bridle, and Caesar dropped his head so Jude could slip it over his ears.

  “I don’t know how you do it, but you truly have a gift when it comes to training horses,” Nate said admiring the docile way that the horse responded to commands.

  “Maybe I’ll buy a few and train them, might be something else the cowboys need.” Jude was half joking, but it wasn’t a bad idea at all, and would give him something to keep him occupied on the lonely days and nights up on the ridge.

  When he’d arrived in Texas, he’d chosen his spot on the ridge because of its isolation, wanting to be well away from people. He’d found it hard to see goodness after losing his family and his home in the war. But, though he enjoyed the peace most of the time, there were also moments when he felt the crushing silence to be overpowering and oppressive. He got what he thought he needed and wondered if he’d been wrong.

  It was those moments that made him head into town, to catch a glimpse of Ellie or to spend time with Mae and Nate. The couple pressed no demands upon him. They simply cared for him and everyone else in an unselfish way that he envied.

  He wished he could forgive and forget, as Nate seemed to have done, but he nurtured his hurts in his heart, and deep down in his very soul. Jude knew they would continue to fester and make him angrier and more bitter if he didn’t do something to curb them. He had no idea how to even start. He’d once hoped that by observing Nate, that he might learn, but it hadn’t yet happened.

  And then there was Ellie Fletcher.

  He had fallen for her from the very first moment he saw her. But he knew he wasn’t good enough for her. She deserved a man like Nate, loving and whole.

  Jude didn’t even know how to hold a conversation with a woman as fine as her, had completely messed it up earlier. He could kick himself for being such a fool. As if a woman like Ellie Fletcher would ever even notice a man like him. She must have many suitors begging for her hand in Fort Worth, fine young men with good prospects and unburdened hearts. She certainly deserved a man who was whole and free from inner pain.

  He squeezed his calves and clicked his tongue. Caesar moved smoothly into a gallop, covering the miles to Jude’s little shack on the ridge in no time. They arrived as the moon rose high, bathing the hillside in a silvery glow. Jude admired the shadowy and dark landscape all around him, glad of the position he’d chosen. Now was one of those times he wished he had company to share it with, to spare him of his darker thoughts and more morose tendencies.

  The campfire he kept alight outside had burned down to glowing red embers. He piled on logs he had cut from a nearby copse and tried to stoke up a blaze. He spied a figure on horseback making his way along the ridge.

  “Howdy,” he said to the man as he approached.

  “Don’t suppose you have room for a tired traveler?” the man asked.

  “That I do,” Jude said. “My shack isn’t much, but there’s a pallet and blankets you can use. I can give you water and feed for your horse. I can even do you some eggs for breakfast in the morning. All for just a dollar.”

  The man smiled. “Right now I’d gladly pay five times that amount,” he said, holding his hand out to Jude to shake on the deal. Jude took it and grasped firmly. He had his first customer, and he was not alone, at least for tonight.

  Chapter Seven

  Representatives from all the small towns in the region gathered in the Longhorn Saloon’s back room to talk about their plans. Ellie paced nervously in the narrow corridor outside, praying that these men would approve her suggestion, and would agree that Springville was indeed the best site for the church and the school.

  She’d tried to listen in, pressing her ear to the thin walls, but there were so many men, all talking over one another, that she had been unable to make out anything useful.

  Finally her father appeared in the doorway. He looked tired, but he had a smile on his face.

  “They agreed?” she asked eagerly.

  “They agreed.” He nodded slowly. “And we have arranged the date for raising the buildings, too. I’ll need to be here for at least a month in June.”

  “You mean, we will need to be here for at least a month,” she corrected him. “This is my project, as much as it is yours.”

  “I suppose you may as well be here, we’ll be making it our home, after all.” His eyes twinkled as he announced the news.

  “They’ve appointed you their permanent minister?”

  She knew her father enjoyed his work, preaching to the many small communities, but he longed for a permanent place in a congregation of his own. He’d said many times recently that Springville was now large enough to support an organized congregation meeting weekly with support groups in the community.

  “They have,” he said proudly. “You don’t mind that we’ll need to move here?”

  For some reason, Jude Rigsby’s handsome features flashed through Ellie’s mind. She blinked quickly at his brown hair just brushing his collar and his strong jaw. She shook her head almost imperceptibly, trying to shift him from her thoughts. It was hardly proper for her first thought to be of the surly and unhappy man she’d met just once in the street.

  “I don’t mind one bit. In fact, I prefer Springville. Perhaps, I can get involved with the school. Would that be terribly improper?”

  She so wanted to help the little ones to learn their numbers and letters. Their smiling
and enthusiastic faces thankfully replaced Mr. Rigsby’s face in her mind. Her experience teaching them on Sundays had brought the children of this town close to her heart.

  “I’m sure that in a town like this, what is deemed right and proper is somewhat adaptable, my dear. We can make our own rules. But, I see no reason why you shouldn’t teach. You have a gift for it after all.”

  Ellie hugged her father, unable to speak. She was so happy he approved. She would hate to ever make him ashamed of her. Ducking her head against his broad chest as his arms clasped her just as tightly, Ellie tried to hide the tears that came unbidden to her eyes.

  She wondered if her father truly knew just how much it meant to her to teach, to be able to pass on knowledge and skills to the children. She had not known what it meant to her until very recently when she’d pushed the boundaries of what she taught in the Sunday School sessions around the territory. Just reading the stories from the Bible had not been enough for her. Teaching the children to read the verses for themselves had given her a sense of purpose she hadn’t known she had been missing.

  They made their way outside, and walked towards the carriage, arm in arm. Her father had thought it a more prudent choice this evening as the night air as they travelled back to Fort Worth would be chilly. She had been known to suffer with a weak chest, and he worried about her health.

  He helped her inside and then hopped up onto the seat to take the reins. Ellie passed him some blankets through the window before leaning back against the plush velvet upholstery. She closed her eyes and stretched out her arms, feeling the soft fabric brushing against her fingers. She started when her hand met the crisp, coolness of an envelope, laying unassumingly on the seat.

  Ellie picked it up, and leaned towards the door where a lantern hung just outside. It was addressed to her, in a sweeping and generous hand. She wondered who could possibly have written to her, and who would have been so secretive as to leave such a letter for her in the carriage, rather than handing it to her in person.