Sun Signs
Page 9
Radiation was my last hope for beating the cancer. Cross your fingers for me.
(And I bet you’re wishing you never asked me how I was doing. Lol.) But you know, I just realized that it feels really good to talk to someone (a REAL person) about all this.
Anyhow, now that my energy is coming back, I’m missing my astrology project. It was fun connecting with you guys, even if 2/3rds of the data was a pack of lies. Now my days are long. There’s no “fun.” No “connections.”
I’ve never known an albino person before. You’re missing the color in your skin, hair and eyes, right? Why is that so awful? I always wanted to be blonde.
Kaleigh
---------------
From: blondeshavemorefun
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: I’m so sorry
What we’re missing is called pigmentation. I wear really thick glasses, which I hate. I’m practically blind, but I guess being albino’s not so bad. Especially when I hear what it’s like to have cancer. It’s weird how we all work so hard to establish our individuality, but basically what we really want is to look like Brad Pitt, right? I’ve actually been thinking about going back to school. Now that I’m older I might be able to handle it better.
Do you ever wonder why Shari and 2good faked their data? Maybe you should ask them.
jamie
P.S. I’m not sorry I asked how u r!! Thanks for telling me everything. I hope you know I care. And I’m glad you think I’m a “real” person.
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: blondeshavemorefun
Subject: Re: I’m so sorry
Jamie,
That’s so good that you’re thinking of going back to school. Best to face your fears, right? That’s what everyone keeps telling me.
I think I will contact Shari and 2good. Thanks. And thanks for caring, and bringing a lump to my throat!
k.
and NO, I do NOT want to look like Brad Pitt, thank you very much!
And YES, you’re real — in lots of ways — but what I meant was that I’d been doing a lot of writing to imaginary people. Sounds stupid, I know. Long story.
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: 2good4u
Subject: just wondering …
why you made up all that data for my astrology report? How come you didn’t just do it the way you were supposed to?
Kaleigh
---------------
From: 2good4u
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: just wondering …
nice 2 hear from u again kaleigh. have u gotten over your little snit? just needed 2 hear from me again?
i told you why. i just wanted 2 have fun.
2good
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: 2good4u
Subject: Re: just wondering …
Is your life so dull that the only fun you have is creating online identities?
k.
---------------
From: 2good4u
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: just wondering …
Ooh, Kaleigh. You’re getting a little snarky! You’re definitely not the sweet little thing i imagined u as. 2 bad. Though maybe now i can re-imagine u as a hot little thing instead. And still hot for me, 2.
Did i mention i’ve been missing u?
2good
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: 2good4u
Subject: Re: just wondering …
C’mon, 2good. Just be serious for one minute. What are you hiding?
k.
---------------
From: 2good4u
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: just wondering …
Wouldn’t u like to know.
2good
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: 2good4u
Subject: Re: just wondering …
Oh! So you are hiding something. Jamie suggested all of us distantstudybuddies probably are.
And if I had known you weren’t going to take my project seriously, I could have found someone who would have. Then I’d be able to complete it. Are you even a Leo??
k.
---------------
From: 2good4u
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: just wondering …
What difference does it make whether i’m a Leo? Will it change anything in the great scheme of things? i think not. u should take life a little less seriously, Kaleigh.
And of course blondie’s right. We r all hiding something. Otherwise we’d b out living our lives instead of cowering behind our computer screens.
2good
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: 2good4u
Subject: Re: just wondering …
You might take life a little more seriously if you were in my shoes.
So why aren’t you out living your life?
k.
---------------
From:2good4u
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: just wondering …
Because I’m incarcerated. Imprisoned. Confined. Detained. Locked up. Put away. That’s my excuse. And yours?
2good
and if I were in your shoes — girl shoes—I’d definitely be taking life less seriously. How many serious drag queens do you know?
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: 2good4u
Subject: Re: just wondering …
Incarcerated? You expect me to believe that? Right.
Kaleigh
who doesn’t know any drag queens, serious or otherwise.
---------------
From: 2good4u
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: just wondering …
No, I guess you wouldn’t believe it. Imagine YOU corresponding with a PRISONER! God forbid.
u didn’t answer me. Y R U hiding behind your computer?
2good
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: 2good4u
Subject: Re: just wondering …
Why should I tell you, 2good? You never tell me anything.
Kaleigh
-------------- From: 2good4u
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: just wondering …
Okay. Then I’ll just have to guess. Let’s see … You’re a princess living in an ivory tower? No. I’ve heard some very unprincess-like thoughts from you.
Your daddy’s a billionaire and u keep him company while he jets around the world, making and breaking deals. No, that can’t be it either. Daddy would just buy u a teacher to come along if that was the case.
i know you’re not an actress, because u were far too impressed when u thought i was an actor. Could u be a model? u could be strutting down a ramp in paris right now. God, i hope not. Those girls are way too skinny for this prisoner. i like a little flesh on my girls.
Well, am i getting close?
2good
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: 2good4u
Subject: Re: just wondering …
Real close, 2good. In fact, you’re almost there …
k.
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: starlight
Subject: lies
Shari, I’ve been wondering … .
Why did you make up all that stuff about Chris and his brother? Do you really live on an island? Did you ever read your horoscopes?
I’m not trying to be mean and stir things up again, and you don’t have to answer me, obviously. I’m just trying to sort stuff out.
It’s been almost a year since I went to a real school. There’s lots of stuff I don’t miss about it, but I do miss having friends. I know you mentioned that you wanted to go to school in some of your letters. I really believed that yo
u knew how it felt to be cut off. Even though I told you about the not-so-good parts of school, I could still identify with how you felt.
Anyway, I won’t blame you if you don’t answer this.
Kaleigh
---------------
From: starlight
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: lies
Kaleigh, I don’t expect you to believe me, but everything I told you is true, except the stuff about the boys.
I’ve been racking my brains trying to figure out why I started telling that stupid story. I’m not a liar. That’s the first lie I can ever remember telling. I guess I told that one because I didn’t want you to know how boring and stupid my life is. And it really is. So when I read my horoscope that first day and it said something about people noticing me more than usual, well, I just knew that wasn’t going to happen here. My mom and dad are so caught up in their work that they don’t notice me. I hardly ever see anyone else. I didn’t want you to know that. I wanted you to think I was interesting. So I started fantasizing about what I’d really like to happen and who I’d really like to notice me. That’s when I dreamt up that story. Telling it took me away from the reality of my boring life. It was fun.
Anyway, now you know. I’m sorry I told you lies, but I’m not really sorry I created Chris. It gave me something to think about, other than my crappy life. I miss him. lol
Shari
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: starlight
Subject: Re: lies
ok, then how come you got so ticked off when i suggested that you couldn’t fall in love with an online guy?
are you really going to go to school on the mainland next year?
Kaleigh
-------------- From: starlight
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: lies
I’ve been wondering that myself. Maybe it was because I was beginning to feel so ridiculous and guilty about carrying on the charade for so long. I didn’t know how to get out of it. Maybe I thought you were starting to disbelieve me — especially cuz I couldn’t even keep their names straight! Maybe I really wanted it to be true. I just don’t know. I feel totally stupid now.
Did you tell the others about what I did?
Yes! I really am going to school on the mainland next year. It’s confirmed. I’ve had an interview with the principal and taken an English test. Believe me, Kaleigh, I really didn’t lie to you about anything else. It feels good to be writing to you again. I hope you feel the same. And I hope that you’ll forgive me.
So, now that you know about how boring and stupid my life is, why don’t you tell me something about you? I’m sure I win the prize for having the dullest life.
Shari
P.S. What are you going to do about the science project?
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: starlight
Subject: Re: Lies
I don’t know what to do about the project. I tried to get out of doing it at all, but Mr. S. wouldn’t let me off the hook. I’m going to have to make up something.
Shari, I did tell Jamie that you’d lied to me, but I didn’t tell him any more than that. I was just mad and accused him of lying 2.
I have missed writing to you. It’s lonely doing school by correspondence, isn’t it?
k.
---------------
From: starlight
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: Lies
Kaleigh … I’m glad that we’re becoming friends again and all that …
BUT YOU STILL HAVEN’T TOLD ME ANYTHING ABOUT YOU!!!!
:)
Shari
March 11
I just read my last few journal entries, and I realize something’s changing. I don’t feel quite so heavy, so empty. Is it the cosmos, the stars, or just that the radiation has been finished for a while? Maybe both. Or do I dare hope that it’s because I’ve been cured? OMIGOD! Just by writing that down, I think I may have jinxed any chance I have of a full recovery! I take it back!!! Erase Erase Erase …
Sometimes Stargazer’s messages creep me out. She said to “forgive” this past week. To “listen with my heart.” My initial reaction was, Right! Forget it! Why should I forgive any of those jerks? But now, without meaning to, I think I’ve done that. It’s such a relief to be chatting with those guys again. And yeah, I guess I have forgiven them. Now I don’t remember why I took the whole science project so seriously anyway. It is just one report. One in about 7 billion a person does over 12 grades of school. And Shari and 2good didn’t fake the data to be mean — they were just going along with the game. And like Stargazer says , we are all in this together — the 4 of us are each connected through school and through the way we’ve chosen to do school. We all have crappy stuff to deal with. None of us is happy with what is happening in our lives. We have so much in common, even though it doesn’t seem that way at first.
How does she know to write all this stuff?????
Maybe I can try to enjoy what time I have left. No matter how it happens, or when, eventually I’m going to be dead, and I’ll be dead long enough. No point being dead while I’m still alive.
Even More Recording
and Analyzing
Forecast For the Week of
March 12 – March 18
by B.A. Stargazer
Gemini (May 22 – June 21)
Wisdom arrives after a long hard
struggle. You will need both twins
to sort through the many messages
that enter your conscious world.
---------------
From: cosmicgirl
To: jselenski
Subject: Research Project
Dear Mr. Selenski,
I tried tackling my science project again, but I don’t know where to start. I went back to the Scientific Method outline and realize that I did successfully (I think) complete the first 4 steps of the “seven steps to discovery.” Where things get messy is in the last 3 steps.
5. Record and Analyze Data
6. State a Conclusion
7. Share Your Discoveries
I recorded the data, but I can’t analyze it because — as I told you — lots of it is false. Therefore I can’t state a conclusion or share my discoveries either. (Unless you want me to share how angry I was at my subjects!)
Anyway, I’m thinking that if I did a good enough job of the first 4 steps, perhaps you could just mark me on that portion, and we’ll leave it at that. Seeing as I did more than half the steps, I figure I should at least get a passing grade.
Does this sound fair and reasonable to you?
And by the way, I think I know FOR SURE what your sun sign is. You are definitely a Libra, who is known for being diplomatic, easygoing and charming. And because you’re all these things, I know you’ll give me that pass.
Yours in science (and diplomacy),
Kaleigh Wyse.
---------------
From: jselenski
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: Research Project
Kaleigh,
Your last message brought a big smile to my face. I do indeed possess all those attributes that you listed. I’m not, however, a Libra. Guess again.
And I’m afraid I’m not going to let you off the hook. I would like a written report on astrology, on what it is and how it works.
Then I would like a report on why your data became unreliable.
I hope to hear from you soon.
Mr. J. Selenski
-------------- From: cosmicgirl
To: starlight Cc: blondeshavemorefun; 2good4u
Subject: another request
Me again,
Stubborn Mr. Selenski is making me complete my report on astrology. I told him some of the data I collected was … fictional (to put it nicely), but now he wants me to analyze WHY that happened. What a pain.
Anyway, I hope you can hang in there just a little longer and c
onsider the following questions.
1. Did you read the daily horoscopes for Leo?
2. If the answer to #1 is No, please explain why.
3. If the answer is Yes, how did you find the experience?
4. Did the horoscopes say anything that caused you to doubt their reliability?
5. Do you believe the horoscopes held some truth for you the majority of the time?
6. Did reading your horoscope change the way you behaved?
7. Overall, do you think the horoscopes written by B.A. Stargazer are accurate
– most of the time,
– some of the time,
– rarely?
8. After being my guinea pig in this experiment, are you more skeptical about astrology, less skeptical, about the same?
Thanks!
Kaleigh
P.S. I may have to submit your responses to Mr. S., so please continue to write in school-type english.
-------------- From: starlight
To: cosmicgirl
Subject: Re: another request
Hi Kaleigh, This is beginning to feel like work now! It was fun reading horoscopes, but all those questions!!!