Boxed Set: Egg and the Hameggattic Sisterhood: [The 12 book 1st adventure + the series prequel]

by Robert Iannone

  “What the heck is she talking about?” asked Egg.

  No one had a clue.

  Meanwhile, the sweet little animal continued to hoot softly. Between its beautiful coloration, cuddly looks and hypnotizing sound, every girl had the irresistible urge to run over, pick it up and pet the thing.

  They approached it slowly trying to get a better look. But the creature became frightened and started to hobble off.

  “Oh,” cried K’ssss. “I think it’s hurt.”

  “I bet if we don’t help it,” said Bl’azzz “. . . the P’xxxies will come and suck the beautiful color out of it.”

  So they all agreed to follow it for at least a little while to see if they could catch and help it. All in all, not a good idea.

  For an injured animal, it moved pretty fast. And no matter how speedy the girls ran (or slithered), the hoot-coot moved a little faster. It finally disappeared over a little hill.

  “We should go back,” suggested Sassi. “We can’t catch it and we’re beginning to get lost.”

  It was the right thing to do. Besides, if it could move that well when it was injured, the P’xxxies probably couldn’t catch it. So they turned around and for the first time took notice of their surroundings . . .

  “Uh-oh.” Now that’s never a good sound when you’re on a quest.

  The kind-of normal forest wasn’t normal anymore.

  They were completely surrounded by big, dead spiky trees that looked downright mean. Only . . . they weren’t dead, they were hungry.

  “Oh, rats . . . now I remember,” said Sylvia.

  “Remember what . . . time to wash your hair?” teased Soo’.

  “No. I remember what J’azzz told us. She said that if anything had any color in it, it was probably trouble.”

  Now that she said it, the other girls all remembered the warning as well.

  “She also said she didn’t give a hoot for the coot.”

  “Now we know why. It led us here on purpose.”

  “Why?” asked Egg.

  Aeri’elle offered the best advice. “I don’t think we should stay and find out. Let’s get out of here as fast as we can.”

  But as fast as they could wasn’t fast enough. The trees were hungry and the girls were food. It was lunchtime.

  “LOOK OUT,” yelled the serpent as a branch reached out and tried to grab Sassi.

  “Run. Come on, run . . . this way.” Aeri’elle had been given the honor of leading the group. Now she felt responsible to lead them to safety.

  The girls moved as fast as they could to escape the circle of trees. But it wasn’t easy . . . the branches kept reaching out to grab them.

  Apparently, the serpents and dragons were too big, so the trees concentrated on the three humans. At one point, they had grabbed Sassi and they started to lift her in the air. Egg and Sylvia leaped up, grabbed the girl’s legs, and yanked her back to the ground. Then K’ssss slithered up and knocked the branches away with her big body.

  “Keep moving,” command Dazzle unnecessarily.

  Aeri’elle, Soo’ and K’ssss finally made it out forest of famished trees. A moment later Egg and Sassi joined them. The five of them turned around to see where the other two were.

  Sylvia was trapped. The branches had her by both arms and legs and one even covered her mouth so she couldn’t scream for help. Bl’azzz, who was in front of her, didn’t realize what was happening. She only turned around when Egg yelled, “save Sylvia.”

  Seeing her sister being assaulted by the vicious trees, Bl’azzz went running back to help her. She reached the girl and using her mouth, which had tremendous power, bit the branch covering Sylvia’s mouth.

  “Get it off me, get it off me,” cried the panicked girl.

  Bl’azzz bit through the other four branches in short order and freed the girl from its deadly embrace. Then using her wings, she wrapped them around her human sister protecting her from any more assaults.

  They made their way as fast as they could and were soon safely outside the ring of trees.

  Sylvia was sobbing and the other girls circled her to give her support and comfort. It took a few minutes, but she finally regained her composure and dried her tears. She smiled bravely at everyone but gave Bl’azzz a big hug. “Thank you.”

  The flame throwing dragon was about to say something funny but changed her mind. Instead she said, “Anytime, Sister. Anytime.”

  *****

  They continued to walk through the Wood but this time ignored anything with color. They followed the only path there was . . . though sometimes it split and they had to choose between the left or right fork.

  These decisions were always made by Egg based on . . . well, actually on nothing. In her mind, she did “eeny-meeny-miney-mo” and that’s how she chose. Not too scientific but better than nothing.

  They managed to find two more Dead Trees and each time Egg gave her little speech and K’ssss did her cat-like rub. The poor souls responded as they did the first time. It seemed to bring them some comfort for they stopped moaning.

  When it began to get dark, they decided to stop for the night. They pitched the three tents and took out food and drink. It would have been wonderful to have a fire to light the very black Wood . . . but they decided to take J’azzz-min’s advice. So they huddled under their blankets, munched their food and talked.

  “Whose turn is it?” asked Soo’. Since the Princess had told her story, they had decided that each of the sisters should tell one also.

  “I’ll go,” volunteered the F’yre Dragon.

  “You make me nervous when you talk,” kidded Soo’. “I never know when you’re going to burp and burn. Remember, we serpents can’t move as fast as dragons or humans.”

  “Just ignore her,” said Sylvia to Bl’azzz. “If you set her on fire, I’ll throw a bucket of water on her.” The girls laughed.

  “Oh, would you throw some water on me, too?” said K’ssss not quite understanding the conversation. This brought more laughter.

  What the girls didn’t know was that they were being watched by the P’xxxies. If it weren’t for their laughter, the little flying troublemakers would have attacked. But as it was, they stayed hidden . . . waiting for the right moment. There was plenty of time. And these creatures . . . meaning the Sisters . . . had so much to offer . . . so much joy and happiness that could be sucked out of them. The P’xxxies smiled in anticipation.

  Unaware of the danger around them, the girls continued their silly banter. Finally Dazzle said, “Bl’azzz, please tell us your tale. And, my sisters . . . be alert. I have noticed that she (pointing her finger at the F’yre Dragon) wets her lips ever so slightly before she . . . ummm . . . releases her fiery gift.”

  “Really? I never knew I did that?”

  “I didn’t know dragons had tongues.”

  “How else could they talk, you sad sack of salty sea?”

  “Ummm . . . Dazzle.”

  “Yes, Egg.”

  “It’s dark. How can we see her tongue?” It was hard to know if she was serious or just kidding.

  Chapter 7 – F’yre Extinguisher

  “What’s the opposite of a Prince?” asked Bl’azzz.

  “The opposite?” asked Sassi.

  “Yeah. You know a Prince is supposed to be handsome and smart and clever and fun. So what’s the opposite?”

  Soo’ smiled and asked, “Why?”

  “Cause my story is about my ex-boyfriend . . . and he was definitely no prince.” The girls laughed.

  “I know, I know,” squealed K’ssss, “How about a k’lown fish?”

  The dragons were as confused as the humans were. But Soo’ said, “That’s good K’ssss.” Seeing the looks on the faces of the others, she explained, “A k’lown fish looks like . . .” and she described the goofy fish to her sisters.

  “That’s pretty good,” said Bl’azzz. “But I think your fish has too much personality. Furn’o is more . . .”

  But before she could finish, th
e girls shouted out suggestions . . . most were just too rude to repeat. Finally, Dazzle ended this bit of nonsense with, “May I suggest we refer to him as His Ignorance, the Third Dunce of Dumb.”

  Whether or not they liked it, the girls all agreed enthusiastically. When a Princess makes a joke . . . it’s always best to laugh.

  “Get on with the story, Bl’azzz,” said Aeri’elle impatiently. “I need some sleep.” The other girls nodded in agreement.

  “Okay, okay. Anyway, about a month ago, I decided to give Furn’o a little surprise party for his birthday. I took him to a very popular place for eye’pye.”

  “For what” asked Egg?

  “Eye’pye is very similar to your pizza pie,” explained Dazzle.

  “Why do they call it eye pie?”

  “Cause they look like the eyes of a dragon.”

  “Oh.”

  “Anyway, I invited his best friend and my best friend to meet us there to surprise him. We had the whole thing planned out. Furn’o and I got there and sat down. While we waited for our order, I pretend to see my girlfriend and I wave. She sees me and comes over. She tells us she’s here with a blind date . . . but the guy is really boring. So I suggest that she bring him over and they can join us.”

  “When does this get funny?”

  “Soon. Anyway, my girlfriend goes and gets her date and brings him back to our table. And lo and behold, it’s Furn’o's best friend. Well, my stupid boyfriend doesn’t get that this is a surprise party for him. All he can say is, ‘Gee, my best friend is dating your best friend. What are the odds? And they come to the same eye’pye place as us. Wow. It’s too weird.”

  “I roll my eyes at the other two, but they decide to string him along until he figures out what’s going on. But after about a half hour, it’s getting downright embarrassing. All he keeps saying is, ‘This is so weird, my best friend and your best friend . . . wow.”

  “Did he ever catch on that it was a set-up?”

  “Never. That’s when I decided to dump him. But one thing led to another and I missed my chance. Then he dumped me.”

  The girls clapped appreciatively at the story (though serpents just slap their tails on the ground). Then K’ssss said something that really stunned the other girls.

  “Wow . . . he’s even dumber than I am, isn’t he?” The silly serpent had actually understood the story.

  “Why did you ever date him in the first place?” asked Soo’.

  “He had just the cutest pair of wings.” Aeri’elle nodded in understanding.

  *****

  They slept well that night, with lots of good thoughts running through their heads. It was those happy thoughts that kept the P’xxxies away. When the sun came up, the whacko cat crowed like a rooster. “Cock-a-doodle-doo”.

  This was greeted none too warmly by a chorus of, “Shut-up you stupid cat.”

  “I thought cats were supposed to meow,” said K’ssss.

  “I’m just very talented,” said J’azzz-min. “I can also do a very fine imitation of a three-winged silver-spotted tree hopper. You want to hear it?”

  “NO” “NO” “NO” “NO” “NO” “NO” “Yes”

  “K’ssss, you seasick simpleton, don’t encourage her.”

  “Sorry.”

  “You girlies need to get your lazy butts out of bed. You have to cross the Wood by nightfall.”

  “Explain.”

  “Don’t you ever use complete sentences?” Dazzle didn’t respond . . . she just glared at the cat. J’azzz-min shrugged and continued, “It’s in the rules. NO LOLLYGAGGING.”

  “What?”

  “Geez, what are you people . . . the seven stupid sisters?”

  “J’azzz, just tell us what you’re talking about . . . please,” begged Egg.

  “Okay, the rules say you have to cross each land in two days or else I have to take you back to the K’iln and you have to start all over again.”

  “Why didn’t you tell us that before?” asked Sylvia who was having a hard time liking their weird guide.

  “Didn’t ask, did you?”

  That made Aeri’elle suspicious. “What else haven’t you told us?”

  “Lots of stuff.”

  “Want to tell us now?”

  “Not particularly. However, I will tell you how the Wood and the P’xxxies got to be the way they are.”

  “We will hear the story as we travel. Egg, get your sisters ready for the day’s journey, please.”

  So they packed up their stuff and started down the path to the next Dead Tree. And while they walked, J’azzz-min talked.

  “Years and years ago, the P’xxxies were the nicest people. This forest was their home . . . but back then it was like any forest; full of color and noise and life. The little folk . . . that be the P’xxxies for any of you who aren’t following the story real close . . . fed from one plant and one plant only. It was called the Pixel’onia and it was beautiful . . .

  The P’xxxies didn’t eat the plant, they ate its color. But the plant wasn’t harmed by it. Every morning it would bloom again in all its variegated glory.

  One day a new creature moved into the Wood . . . a Six-Strided Sap-Sucker. The P’xxxies welcomed the creature. It was told to enjoy all that the Wood had to offer . . . but please, don’t eat the Pixel’onia. Being a sap-sucker, it had no interest in anything but the sap from trees and readily agreed.

  One day about a year after it arrived, the six leggedy creature decided to try the Pixel’onia . . . just for fun. And to its surprise, it found the taste was good . . . actually better than good. The plant was delicious.

  And the more it drank of the flowers nectar, the more it’s color began to change. In less than a month, it had gone from gray and black to . . .

  . . . red and yellow and orange. The shock of the change gave way to enjoyment of its new beauty. Soon, all it would eat was the Pixel’onia. But the Sap-sucker ate so much and so often that the plants eventually died out.

  The P’xxxies were outraged. They were so mad they forced the Six-Strided Sap-Sucker to leave the Wood and never return. But it was too late. The plants on which they lived were gone forever.

  The P’xxxies didn’t know what to do. Eventually they found that they could live off of other living things . . . by sucking the color out of plants and trees, and joy and hope out of animals and birds.

  And over time, they changed from the nicest of people to the meanest . . . all because they had befriended the Six-Strided Sap-Sucker.”

  The girls had listened with great interest to the story. It was the first time they had ever heard the cat say something that wasn’t mean or downright weird.

  “Can’t they get the plant to grow again?” asked Egg.

  “What plant?”

  “The pixel thingy.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “The plant that the P’xxxies eat. You just said that they . . . oh, never mind.” The old J’azzz-min was back.

  “Cat, I have a question.”

  “Call me J’azzz-min, why don’t you.”

  Sylvia would rather have given it a big whack on the head. Instead, she asked, “J’azzz-min is there any cure if the P’xxxies get you? Or does it wear-off like the sand serpent’s sting?” Both were excellent questions.

  “Nope.” That was a lousy answer.

  “You mean it lasts forever? You never get better?”

  “Yup.”

  “That’s a bummer,” said Bl’azzz.

  “Well, it’s been a barrel of laughs, but I gotta go.”

  “Where is it exactly that you go to?” asked the ever-curious Aeri’elle.

  “Usually just anywhere where you ain’t.” And the cat was gone.

  *****

  They decided that they had better pick up the pace if they were going to get out of the Wood before their time was up. With Aeri’elle in the lead again, they found three more of the Dead Trees in short order. And each time Egg spoke to them as before and K’ssss gave the
m a friendly rub.

  “Didn’t the cat say there were seven trees?” asked Sassi.

  “I think so.”

  “So just one to go. I think we have time to stop and rest. K’ssss and I . . .,” said Soo’, “. . . are not used to all this walking and hiking.”

  “Neither are us dragons. I’d much rather be flying.”

  “Egg, we should rest,” suggested Dazzle.

  So they found themselves a pleasant looking clearing next to a small stream and made camp. While the humans broke out the food and drinks, the serpents slithered over to the stream and slipped in.

  “OH, OH, OH,” sighed K’ssss in utter delight. “It feels soooooo good.”

  “Quiet down, you yammering yam, before you attract the P’xxxies.”

  K’ssss looked around anxiously. “Do you think they would hurt sea serpents?

  “Yeah,” answered Soo’ in an unusually serious voice. “I think serpents and humans are easy targets. We’re fat and slow, and the humans are small and weak (compared to serpents and dragons). Aeri’elle and Bl’azzz will probably be okay.”

  “I think we should go back to camp,” said a frightened K’ssss.

  “Good idea,” and they both got out of the wonderful stream and made their way back to their sisters.

  “How was the water?” asked Sassi as she handed a pickled eel to K’ssss.

  The silly serpent didn’t answer the question. Instead, she asked, “Sassi, will you come visit me when this is over?” She said it with such emotion that it startled the other girl.

  “Of course, I will. K’ssss is there something wrong?”

  “I’m afraid,” she said in a small voice.

  Sassi leaned over and gave her sister a hug. “We all are. That’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

  “I’m not afraid for me. I’m afraid for all of you,” she pointed at the rest of the Sisterhood.

  Sassi was touched. “It’s going to be alright. We’re all going to make it through this. Just you wait and see.”

  The serpent thought about that for a moment, and then said “Sassi, I think you’re wrong. I’m never going to see all of you again.”

  “Why do you say that?”