GIVE IN: God's Hellfire MC

by Naomi West

  Now, Billy Lyons was sitting here, asking me about whether or not he should ask out the new receptionist, see if she wanted to go grab a drink with him after work on Friday. And all I wanted to do was eat my burger, finish the next

  Chapter of the book I was reading, and get back to work to finish out this day.

  “Come on, Peter,” Billy said, slapping my shoulder with the back of his hand, “gimme some hints here, brother. Gimme some tips, or let me like, rub your head or something and get some of that lover-boy charm of yours.”

  That was me. Peter O'Dwyer. Born in Washington, moved out here after high school. I'd been told by Avery Brumfield to not make any friends, form any long-term attachments, or let anyone get too close, or too suspicious.

  “Talk less about yourself, less about politics, or anything else,” she advised. “Your job is to stay insignificant. Eat most of your meals at home. Don't go to bars, don't get drunk.”

  “So, don't have fun,” I suggested.

  “Exactly. You're hiding in fear of your life, not going on vacation.”

  I blinked slowly as I looked into Billy's eyes. “I got no idea what you're talking about, man. I haven't been laid in months.”

  Billy rolled his eyes and guffawed an awful, braying laugh. “Ha, right, dude,” he said, braying again. “I've seen the way those MILFs look at you, dog, at the way they get their husband to even go for the clear coat.”

  “That's because the clear coat protects your paint job, Billy.”

  He brayed out another laugh. “Right, man, right,” he said, slapping my upper arm again.

  It's a funny thing when you're playing roles. If you act a certain way long enough, like really put your mind to becoming that thing, sometimes it sticks and you start to think it's not just a role. Maybe because it wasn't anymore.

  I'd followed Avery's advice, had kept my own personality down. I listened more than I'd used to, kept my mouth shut twice as often as I ever had, and tried to just be all around more humble and not accept a single bit of credit.

  I wanted to be a fly on the wall, a shadow in the back of the room. And that's what I became.

  I thought that, maybe, just maybe, if I could keep my ego in check going forward, I'd be a better man. It had been my ego, after all, that had gotten me into this mess. Somehow, I'd thought I could almost single-handedly rip off a Russian mob boss, then outwit him into proving his own guilt.

  I was wrong, of course.

  And everyone paid the price for my ego.

  All those months ago, Gov had warned me where we were headed. He'd told me I'd bring this all upon myself.

  Boy, was he right.

  Too late to tell him now, though. He was long gone, just like Kaci and the rest of my life.

  “Alright,” I told Billy, then wiped a napkin across my lips, “see you out there. Got some cars to move, I guess.”

  “Yeah, Pete,” he said. “See you out there, buddy.”

  I ain't your buddy, Billy. That was what I wanted to say at least.

  But, instead, I kept my mouth shut. No one wanted to hear that trash from me.

  # # #

  Kaci

  Wanna be bored out of your mind? Go work in an indie bookstore that specializes in old history books. Then live above it.

  The only people you'll ever talk to that are your own age are delivery guys from the deli down the street. They'll leer at you, their eyes traveling up and down your body like they want to own it or possess you.

  And the whole time you'll know that, in your previous life, they never could have afforded you. And you'll also know, too, that they wouldn't have known what to do with you, even if they could.

  God, I wanted to tell them to fuck off and die, just so I could watch their little, sad faced wither. Not because I was mean, but because it would have made my life a little less boring.

  I woke up. I opened the shop. I waited on the handful of customers that came in each day. I closed the shop. I went home.

  Sometimes, though, I went to the movies on a Friday night. That wasn't too often, unfortunately.

  And the worst part about it was that this whole thrilling, exciting life was led under the constant gray of the Seattle sky. It was like God had specialized in, and truly gone out of his way when it came to making me lonely.

  New Miserable Existence! Only $9.99! Now with extra drizzle!

  As I sat there at the cash register, staring out the front window at the streaks of damp running down the glass, I sighed. This was my life now. And, if I wanted to keep it, I had to stay boring. No impulsive actions, no one night stands, even if I'd wanted them. No drinking. No friends. Because that kind of life had nearly gotten me killed, once upon a time.

  The phone rang, the old handset's ringer loud enough to disturb the dust on the even older books, and nearly sending me jumping. Even after three months of this place, I still hadn't gotten used to that ring.

  “Walter's World of War, this is Andrea speaking.”

  “Hi Kaci,” Agent Brumfield said on the other line.

  “Oh, it's you,” I said. “Hey.”

  I know I should have been more excited to hear from an old piece of my previous life. I should have been nearly ecstatic to hear about anything that wasn't old books about old wars my dead papaw wasn't old enough to have even fought in.

  But, I wasn't.

  Instead, every time Avery called it was just another sad reminder of the life I'd left behind back in New Orleans. It called up all those memories, too, of those mistakes I'd made, and the things I'd left undone.

  “Any word on Micah?” I asked, not even bothering to whisper. If there had even been a customer in here, their hearing wouldn't have been sharp enough to hear me if they were in the stacks. “Can you at least tell me how he's doing?”

  “He's alive,” she said, as tight-lipped as ever, “and that's as much as you're going to get out of me.”

  I grunted. “Still won't let me call him, will you?” I asked. I'd spent the first month begging her every chance I could. Just to give me his number at least so I could talk to him. I even promised to just call and hang up right away. Anything to simply hear the sound of his voice asking who was calling, or who was there.

  Even sound of his breath would have been enough to set my world ablaze.

  “Nope,” she said. “Besides, I'm here to see how you're doing.”

  “Today is a Wednesday,” I said. “So, it rained. Guess what it did yesterday, and what it's going to do tomorrow. Come on, Brumfield. Guess.”

  Avery laughed a little. “Your pessimistic attitude isn't doing you any good,” she said. “You know that, right?”

  “Yeah,” I agreed. “But, surprisingly, it makes me feel warm and cozy like my boyfriend used to.”

  “Come on, Kaci,” Avery said, a little bit of chastisement in her voice. “You both agreed to this. You knew what the deal was. You took your shot, it didn't work. That's life, and it sucks. But that's how it is sometimes. But, at least you tried, right?”

  I didn't respond. I just let my silence do the talking for me.

  “Right,” Agent Brumfield said. “Alright, I was just checking up to make sure you're fine. You know the drill, right? You spot anyone crazy or weird hanging around, you call me alright?”

  “Yes, ma'am,” I said, rolling my eyes even though she couldn't see me. “If I see something, I say something.”

  “You got it, Kaci. Talk to you soon.” Then she hung up, and I was back to my normal, humdrum, boring life.

  I blew out a sigh. “Great,” I said before laying my head down on the counter. “Just fucking great.”

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Kaci

  I closed up the shop a few hours after talking to Agent Brumfield on the phone. Wally, who was in back cataloging some new arrivals, agreed it was time to shut the place down, since there weren't likely to be any more customers.

  Wally was a good man, not cranky or mean, or anything, and he never looked at me the way my Jamess o
r the deli delivery guys did. He just treated me like any normal young lady off the street who happened to work for him.

  “You doing okay, Andrea?” he asked, his voice warbling a little in that old man kind of way.

  “Yeah,” I said, giving him a strange look. “Of course.”

  “You just look a little,” he said, pausing to think of the word. “Distracted?”

  I'd been thinking about Micah non-stop since Agent Brumfield's call earlier in the day. The way his arms had felt around me, how his soft, full lips crushed mine into submission when he kissed me, how he'd smelled, how he'd felt inside me.

  I shrugged. “Nah,” I said, trying to play it off as best I could. “I'm fine Mr. Wally. You have a good night, okay?”

  I headed out for the night. I went out the front door, locking it behind me, and headed around to the entrance that led up to the small fully-furnished efficiency that I rented from Wally. I tramped up the damp smelling stairs, unlocked the deadbolts on my apartment, and popped inside.

  After eating a frozen meal for one and watching some bad reality TV, I decided to call it a night. It wasn't even nine-thirty yet.

  I did all my hygienic maintenance for the night, then stripped down to just my panties and pulled on the tee shirt Micah had been wearing that day in the park. It still had grass stains on it, but I could tell his smell was fading despite the fact that I'd refused to wash it.

  I crawled under the covers, surrounded by the faint smell of my missing man. He filled my nose, and my mind, as I drifted off to sleep.

  In my sleep, I dreamed of him.

  Micah's hands felt like velvety soft vices where they gripped my naked body. I struggled against his grip, knowing he liked it when I tried to struggle, but I couldn't break free of him. He pulled me close, his lips tracing down my flesh like firebrands. I was like a rag doll in his grip, a tiny thing that he could do with as he pleased.

  We lay on his bed together, where we'd spent so many nights, and I moaned and writhed under his touch, needing to feel his hands on more of my body. I pressed myself closer to him, begging for more.

  “You like this, Kaci?” he asked as he gathered up my wrists in one hand and pinned them to the bed over my head. With his other hand, he explored my body, his fingers circling my nipples, tracing over my belly button. “Do you like belonging to me?”

  I nodded, moaning louder. I pushed myself into his wandering hand, inviting him to touch more of me, to enjoy more of me.

  “Say it, then,” he nearly growled. “Tell me you like it.”

  “I love it,” I said, going one better, knowing he would appreciate it. “I love feeling your touch.”

  “Good girl,” he said, gifting me with his lips on one sensitive nipple.

  I moaned again as pleasure slowly spread out from where he touched, as it slowly spread from my sex.

  He leaned down, kissed me again. “Such a good girl,” he growled again, his voice raw with passion as his hand dipped down between my thigh and roughly parted my legs.

  I moaned a little more loudly as his hands found my sex, as they began to tease me. He stroked up my inner thighs, his nails just barely grazing over my skin.

  I needed him, I knew. Needed him like plants needed water, or we needed air. I moved my hips invitingly, trying to entice his hand to move higher, to give me what I craved.

  Micah slid his hand higher, the tips of two fingers just barely stroking up and parting my lips. “Is this what you want, Kaci?”

  I nodded. “Yes, sir,” I said. “I want it, please.” I spread my legs wider for him, anticipating what he would want next.

  He slowly, so slowly, traced his fingers around the hood of my clit. I bit my lip, not wanting to call out too loudly, even as the pleasure began to well up inside me. I moved my wrists a little, just because I felt like testing him, then gasped as he squeezed his hand tighter together.

  “Try it again,” he admonished, sliding two fingers into me and finding my g-spot, “and I'll have to punish you.”

  I nodded as well as I could with my head thrown back and moaning under this incessant pleasure, secretly relishing the idea of a punishment by Micah. The feel of his strong hands on my backside, spanking me till I cried out for more. Just the thought of being bent over his lap, with his hard cock pressing into my stomach as he smacked my bare ass was too delicious to pass up.

  He squeezed his hand tighter around my wrist, securing them, as he rubbed my clit with his thumb.

  My whole body quaked with the new stimulation, and I arched up off the bed. I felt like I was dissolving into a puddle of liquid, erotic heat, even though I knew my whole body had seized and begun to shake. I came almost violently, crying out as he mercilessly played with my pussy, making me a puppet for that strong hand of his.

  I knew what I wanted, now, as the orgasm rippled through my body like a set of tiny flares inside me. I looked down at him as I came down from the high of my orgasm. We locked passion-hooded eyes.

  What fun is having someone in control if you can't test the limits of that control? I struggled against the hands gripping my wrists.

  “What did I tell you?” he asked, sighing like I was a wayward strumpet.

  I cringed back a little, giving him what he wanted to see. “Not to struggle, sir.”

  “Come here, then,” he said as he rearranged himself so his back was against the wide, heavy headboard and dragged me across his lap. It wouldn't have mattered if I'd tried to struggle, he was just too strong. Besides, I was craving it. “This hurts me more than it hurts you.”

  # # #

  Micah

  I spanked her, not so much for punishment, but to show her I could. She pushed back, meeting each open-handed slap with a sharp, moaning cry. After each set of five, I carefully soothed away the pain, rubbing her smooth, reddened ass.

  Slap.

  “Oh! Micah!”

  Slap. “Count.” Another slap.

  “One!”

  Another.

  “Two!”

  My hand came down, smacked her perfect ass again as she wiggled under the swat.

  “Three!”

  This continued for a while, till she reached ten. My slick cock was hard as an iron bar, digging almost painfully into her stomach. I readjusted myself as she pleaded for me to play with her.

  “Please,” she whined, her voice higher than normal, “just touch me again. Please.”

  I stroked her puffy lips from behind, slid two fingers into her.

  Kaci moaned, spread her thighs for me as I reached down and grabbed one of her small, pert breasts, rolled her nipple in my fingers, and pinched. She cried out again, her whole body arching backwards, nearly coming up off my lap as I fingered her. She pushed back into my hand, grinding herself on my fingers.

  “Oh God,” Kaci cried out, her whole body purring like a finely tuned machine, “use me, sir. I'm yours, I belong to you. I promise you.”

  I was tired of this slapping and playing, though. I wanted in her pussy again. I lifted her off my lap and helped her straddle me. “Now,” I said. “I want my cock inside you, now.”

  Facing me, her small, firm tits pressing into my chest, I gripped her tightly by the hips. Together we lowered her pussy onto my cock, my head splitting her lips wide. “Oh, Micah,” she groaned, her voice several octaves lower than normal as her eyes went wide. “God, you feel amazing.”

  It was like sliding into pure, liquid heat. I threw my head back against the headboard, groaning as she took all of me inside her. I moved my hips as I raised and lowered her tiny frame, fucking her like it was the last thing we'd do.

  Our lips found each other in the dim light, hers soft and begging for my touch, mine crushing and hard. I pushed my tongue into her mouth, groaning as she sucked on it greedily.

  I felt her tighten and contract around my cock, milking me as I fucked her. Her whole body convulsed and shook as she cried out into my mouth.

  I moved her faster up and down my pole, dragging her up and down
the whole length like she was a feather. I moved my hips, rubbing her clit with the base of my cock.

  She broke away from my mouth, gasping for air. “Micah,” she cried out again, her whole body shaking.

  I kissed her neck, pushed her back, sucked first one tit into my mouth, then the other. The whole time, a litany of words came from my mouth. “Do you like that, Kaci? Do you like having my cock buried inside you? Am I making you cum all over my cock?”

  “Yes, Micah,” she said, “God, yes. Please, don't stop.”